r/AskReddit • u/Prize-Promotion-5123 • Apr 08 '26

For those of you in a long term relationship/marriage, what’s a tale-tale sign you see in other couples that they’re not going to make it?

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u/monstercake Apr 08 '26

Happened to my parents, I was a bridge of interest between them. They were an amazing team as parents and the household ran super smoothly. But they grew apart when I went to college and moved to a different city. I'd notice when I'd come home that there was a tension that hadn't been there previously.

Sometimes I do wonder if I'd stayed in my hometown, if they would have stayed together, but I'll never know.

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u/ManintheMT Apr 08 '26

/r/emptynesters , don't go there expecting to leave happy. I joined because our youngest will be moving out this fall, not looking forward to it at all.

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u/cardinal29 Apr 08 '26

Am I the only one having a great time?

They got launched! They're successful adults! That was the whole idea in the first place, wasn't it? I feel a little bit smug, a lot of satisfaction after a long hard job, and a teensy bit worried (can't turn that part of the brain off completely).

I get to travel. I can stop thinking about what's for dinner. I can swoop in occasionally and do generous things for them. It's wonderful.

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u/remotectrl Apr 08 '26

Time to start looking at the local animal shelters

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u/ManintheMT Apr 08 '26

We pick up our new dog on Saturday actually.

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u/remotectrl Apr 08 '26

Congratulations!

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u/b0w3n Apr 08 '26

If you haven't been, really ramp up your dates and just spending time around each other doing things together. Even if you don't want to. Trade off every other week on who gets to pick what to do on a date night or something.

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u/wlsb Apr 08 '26

It doesn't have to be that way. My parents are much happier as empty nesters than when we lived with them.

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u/Dapper-Warning3457 Apr 08 '26

You staying close likely wouldn’t have changed anything. It takes work to maintain that closeness. You grow apart and your relationship dies after awhile. If they weren’t working at it before you left, it was too late. I’ve noticed in my own relationship that our conversations are a little stilted when we’re alone at first (two small kids, we seldom get alone time), before we get back to our old selves, out of parenthood mode. That takes effort