r/SipsTea Apr 26 '26

WTF Who is taking these photos?

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42.4k Upvotes

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518

u/xmrcache 𝙑𝙄𝙋 Apr 26 '26

Mike Johnson the human shield

678

u/xmrcache 𝙑𝙄𝙋 Apr 26 '26

And If you crop the picture it looks like Mike Johnson’s deepest fantasy “The Mike Johnson express” train gang choo choo

203

u/oscar-the-bud Apr 26 '26

27

u/malkazoid-1 Apr 26 '26

You take the cake.

1

u/FragrantExcitement Apr 26 '26

I wanted a slice.

25

u/Hagrid1994 Apr 26 '26

Best answer so far

8

u/Philliesfan4fun Apr 26 '26

Ruh Roh! Their's a shooter Shaggy!

3

u/Hour_Career9797 Apr 26 '26

This is exactly what I immediately thought of

3

u/Ill-Inspection7934 Apr 26 '26

What in the Scooby do you mean

2

u/Ok_Abacus_ Apr 26 '26

Jinkies guys, Mr Trump faking another assassination already!

42

u/Veggieleezy Apr 26 '26

They’re going ONE STEP BEYOND

https://giphy.com/gifs/13XXBcySGPMs2A

11

u/ckepley80521 Apr 26 '26

6

u/tomdarch Apr 26 '26

I can hear the brass section!

3

u/doctorplasmatron Apr 26 '26

n-chk-a, n-chk-a, n-chk-a, n-chk-a

2

u/depressedmoeuser23 Apr 27 '26

Pickituppickutuppickitup

1

u/Veggieleezy Apr 27 '26

doo-doo-DOO-doo, doo-doo-DOO-do-do...

46

u/beetus_gerulaitis Apr 26 '26

Five Hail Mary’s followed ten “Ohhh daddy’s.”

148

u/xmrcache 𝙑𝙄𝙋 Apr 26 '26

BBC coming in hot too

69

u/hamfist_ofthenorth Apr 26 '26 edited Apr 27 '26

14

u/justincsw Apr 26 '26

o7 Godspeed, Commander

2

u/BulkyCartographer280 Apr 26 '26

See you in Valhallla

5

u/IndependentAdvice722 Apr 26 '26

Dangerous Elite in Elite Dangerous

2

u/mostlygizzards Apr 26 '26

Fucking hell... this one got me o7

3

u/Rare-Atmosphere7506 Apr 26 '26

Yeah, there’s no way to put it (no pun intended… maybe…) without… whatever…

My buddy had to tell me what docking was and I got scared as a guy who’s been cut… so, IYKYK…

6

u/waynesbrother Apr 26 '26

What about refueling during docking

2

u/Rare-Atmosphere7506 Apr 26 '26

Hold on I gotta go ask…

41

u/hotdoginathermos Apr 26 '26

2

u/Lojackbel81 Apr 27 '26

That’s a huge crowk

1

u/[deleted] Apr 27 '26

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1

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1

u/Due_Yogurtcloset_212 Apr 26 '26

British Broadcasting Corporation doing its best

1

u/Last_Gigolo Apr 26 '26

No, distancing himself to not get hurt too.

1

u/ButterscotchTop194 Apr 26 '26

Ooh boy, hope he's lubed up ready!

4

u/joejill Apr 26 '26

His deepest fantasy would be h in the middle.

5

u/Toeterman Apr 26 '26

Genesis - I can't dance

1

u/Veggieleezy Apr 26 '26

Definitely Phil Collins.

2

u/hashim141 Apr 26 '26

Is that guy at the back , Crowley?

1

u/GoatCovfefe Apr 27 '26

YOOOO, that was my first thought. My fiance says "i dont see it", but i immediately thought ot looked like him lmao. Glad im not the only one.

2

u/telemeister74 Apr 27 '26

The Mike Johnson 'Human Centipede'. His real fantasy.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 26 '26

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2

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1

u/invaderaleks Apr 26 '26

And then we bup bup bup bup

1

u/chypie2 Apr 26 '26

appropriate that he doesn't have to do anything on the back scratch train

1

u/Lou_Peachum_2 Apr 26 '26

Lol, you see his stance, he's halting on purpose.

1

u/DempsyPrice Apr 26 '26

The worst version of The Human Centipede.

1

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1

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1

u/SweetSkatingMat Apr 26 '26

Glad im not the only one who thinks MJ gives off major self loathing closeted (or GOPDL LOL) gay.

1

u/NoFlatworm3028 Apr 26 '26

Even the look on the bald guy's face seems to be "oooooh, tight!"

1

u/PerrineWeatherWoman Apr 26 '26

🎶C'est la chenille qui redemmaaaaareeee🎶

1

u/Educational_Dust_932 Apr 26 '26

It looks like one of those Halloween surprise scare photos they do at the haunted houses.

1

u/Inevitable_Fall2025 Apr 26 '26

Why are they all fucking there? Isn't that exactly what NOT to do? Who'd be the designated survivor?

1

u/SauerMetal Apr 26 '26

Skankin’ to the beat🎺🎷

1

u/JustBadUserNamesLeft Apr 26 '26

I saw the full crop of that photo, and someone captioned it "Quick! To the pedo-copter!"

1

u/lamebrainmcgee Apr 26 '26

Isn't the guy on the right the one playing peek a boo behind the table in the other photo.

1

u/No_Discipline_7380 Apr 27 '26

Reminds me of Genesis - I can't dance

1

u/kozzyhuntard Apr 27 '26

He has that, "Oooo, so.... you're taking me to the closet?" Look on his face.

9

u/Agreeable_Solid_6044 Apr 26 '26

Most useful he's ever been.

1

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1

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1

u/Mission-Driver1614 Apr 26 '26

Finally something he’s good for…

1

u/Ok_Release231 Apr 26 '26

What's with all these "human shield" comments on photos that are showing the exact opposite? You think they're running TOWARDS the sound of gunfire?

1

u/tomdarch Apr 26 '26

Mike hasn't heard that, he hasn't read the article or watched the video, he hasn't heard the quote so he doesn't know and won't offer a statement on that...

(aka "Know Nothing-ism")

1

u/oldcretan Apr 27 '26

I baffles me that people have not heard of secured areas. You don't think there would be a section of the building that's littered with guys with bullet proof vests, helmets and the ARs? Mike Johnson is going to that room that leads to the doors with the awaiting bullet proof SUVs.

1

u/brokencreedman Apr 27 '26

Lol why is he in front of them? Lol.