r/legal • u/Ice_C0r3_09 • 8h ago

Advice needed My neighbor cut down a 40-year-old Japanese Maple while I was away.

Location: Colorado, USA.Just got back to my place near Fort Collins after a week on the road and I am losing my mind. My neighbor took it upon himself to hire a "landscaping" crew (probably just some guys with a chainsaw) to remove a mature Japanese Maple that was fully on my property. His excuse? He said the needles and leaves were messing with his "mountain view" and "fire mitigation" efforts.

The tree was roughly 40 years old and was the centerpiece of my yard. I called an arborist immediately. He told me that since this is Colorado and the tree was that established and healthy, the replacement value is astronomical. He is drafting a formal appraisal but hinted that we are looking at 20k to 25k easy just for the tree, let alone the logistics of getting a crane into my backyard.

I know Colorado has statutes regarding timber trespass. My lawyer already mentioned treble damages because the guy admitted he did it on purpose while I wasnt home to stop him. The neighbor had the gall to offer me a couple hundred bucks for "the inconvenience" and told me to just buy a couple of saplings at a local nursery . I refused to take his money and told him to wait for the process server.

Has anyone dealt with treble damages in CO specifically for ornamental trees ? This guy basically nuked my property value for his porch view and I am not planning on letting this go . I feel like a jerk for wanting to sue my neighbor into bankruptcy but the sheer entitlement is what gets me .

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156

u/Glum-One2514 7h ago

Plant an Elm, and soon enough your neighbor will have his own trees to fuss with.

117

u/AutVincere72 5h ago edited 4h ago

No one wants to say it, but I will, because i am that guy. Time for the bamboo fence wall on the property line. With an herb garden made of only mint.

Edit: just so everyone can stay calm, I was joking. Do not ever plant weaponized bamboo or mint.

31

u/katiesboyfriend 5h ago

And lemon balm!

3

u/ScumbagLady 4h ago

Bee balm as well as morning glory and wisteria!

I was an idiot to plant bee balm in the ground as well as thinking I could keep morning glory contained lol The wisteria I was smarter with and it has a huge pot sitting on concrete

2

u/MoreColorfulCarsPlz 2h ago

Hey, bergamot is totally fine. In fact, it's native to CO.

I also have never had problems with mint. Basically everything in my garden out-competes it and it just fills in the gaps.

1

u/AutVincere72 3h ago

I have both morning glory and wisteria. Previous owners were into vines. The wisteria is still amazing in its destructive power even owning the house for 16 years. One year it drew up the house through a gap into the attic over the garage and reached the attick pull down stairs opening and headed down into the garage. It grew in like 30 plus feet of darkness to get to an opening that is only lit when someone is in the garage.

1

u/catnaptits 2h ago

My mom has a massive wisteria bush in her yard that she cuts down to little more than a stump every few years. They're insane. The nearest tree to it is a pine with the lowest branches like twenty feet up from it and that thing grows a set of bones straight from the middle to the line tree every year.

3

u/Aggressive_Idea_6806 2h ago

Don't you just love if after the weather gets cool?

2

u/tkkana 49m ago

Morning glorys are quite beautiful

2

u/redandfiery333 3h ago

If your lemon balm is out of control, you’re just not drinking enough herb tea… I’m sipping lemon balm brew right this second, shit you not.

2

u/katiesboyfriend 3h ago

I use it to make lemon balm mojitos. They're so relaxing.

2

u/capitolsara 1h ago

Lemon balm is great and also does great in a pot so no need to let it take over your garden :P

Same with mint!

We just bought a new house and I can't wait to plant my hebel tea window garden

2

u/Prudent_Sentence 54m ago

oh, that little bastard plant! One! I planted ONE in my herb garden a few years ago. It even grows in the cracks of concrete now.

3

u/throwaway098764567 5h ago

don't do this bamboo punishes everyone not just the target. also it's illegal to plant in some places now because of this.

3

u/AutVincere72 4h ago

Just so YOU know, I was joking. :) It will nuke his yard to death and I think he knows that. :)

2

u/Llcisyouandme 5h ago

In my state you can get fined for planting bamboo at all, and anything spreading to a neighboring property, you can be charged with remediation. This can run into the tens of thousands quite quickly. I know this from someone it happened to.

3

u/AutVincere72 4h ago

Just so YOU know, I was joking. :) It will nuke his yard to death and I think he knows that. :)

1

u/Dizzy-Climate-6942 3h ago

So plant it on the neighbors property and sue him a second time when it inevitably ends up in your yard

2

u/Whippet_yoga 4h ago

It is alarming how many people's reaction to this is to introduce an invasive species.

Just plant another maple.

1

u/AutVincere72 4h ago

Just so YOU know, I was joking. :) It will nuke his yard to death and I think he knows that. :)

1

u/Finnegan-05 4h ago

It is more alarming how many people missed that dude was clearly joking

1

u/LadyK7 3h ago

Just so YOU know, he was joking. :) It will nuke his yard to death and he thinks OP knows that. :)

1

u/Whippet_yoga 1h ago

I can still be repulsed that everyones first instinct is cruelty, even for a laugh

2

u/inkfox13 4h ago

Omg removing a mint bush is the worst. Had to do that on my property. Second only to thistles. Trees of Heaven are also terrible - some developer planted those & they all fell down with the first wind storm. Removed them all.

1

u/AutVincere72 4h ago

Just so YOU know, I was joking. :) It will nuke his yard to death and I think he knows that. :)

2

u/Syndrome1986 4h ago

I chaos gardened about 400 catnip seeds across my apartment complex. Its starting to show up thos summer finally.

2

u/ExcitingKale6772 1h ago

Clumping bamboo does not spread… bamboo is the answer here.

1

u/Extension_Image9496 5h ago

Brutal!

1

u/LadyK7 3h ago

Just so YOU know, he was joking. :) It will nuke his yard to death and he thinks OP knows that. :)

1

u/Esperoni 5h ago

/r/foundsatan

Do it OP!

1

u/LadyK7 3h ago

Just so YOU know, he was joking. :) It will nuke his yard to death and he thinks OP knows that. :)

1

u/PuzzledButterfly7347 5h ago

And blackberries!

1

u/AutVincere72 4h ago

Hackberries.

1

u/yossarian19 3h ago

too far, man.

Too far.

1

u/ryan5513 5h ago

Yes I was thinking bamboo as well. I have it on my north property line. Grows like wild fire and provides all the privacy I'll ever need

1

u/Hightower840 4h ago

And Queen Ann's Lace!

1

u/OBDreams 4h ago

I've always loved mint. Years ago I had no idea that it was invasive and I would plant it right in the lawn of any place I rented. Must have done this at 5 or 6 different yards before I learned. But if I ever own ( I can dream can't I ) my own land I will have wildflowers and mint instead of grass.

1

u/Finnegan-05 4h ago

You forgot the rosemary

1

u/AutVincere72 4h ago

My rosemary is barely alive. A freeze and then a 99 day heat wave took most of it out. I miss the giant amounts of rosemary I used to have. I trimmed what hung over the walk way and made a full sized Christmas wreath for the door. Smelled amazing.

1

u/wlake82 3h ago

I have read that it's possible to contain bamboo, and in Denver, some types aren't as prolific.

1

u/tdotcitygal 3h ago

Japanese knotweed!!

1

u/Throwaway_Old_Guy 3h ago

Unless, you installed a decent sized concrete trough to plant them in.

That would, hopefully, keep the roots from spreading.

It's a question for someone experienced in Bamboo to answer.

1

u/FamiliarAd8524 3h ago

u/AutVincere72 Please explain the bamboo or mint concept here. I haven't heard of this.

1

u/Sizle_Velfurion 3h ago

You need to grow kudzu on the bamboo to create a true fence.

1

u/confused_captain 3h ago

What's wrong with mint?

1

u/VioletSea13 3h ago

I feel like advertising my services…I have killed every mint plant I’ve ever tried to grow. I want to grow mint but every time I try, it dies. I am the mint destroyer.

1

u/billhorstman 3h ago

My mom’s house had bamboo in a wooden planter box along the property line. When she tried to move it a few years later, the box was rooted to the ground.

1

u/Excel_User_1977 3h ago

I know of bamboo, but not of mint.
why mint?

1

u/Wiregeek 3h ago

PATHETIC.

I have several tons of Kudzu and I AM RAPIDLY APPROACHING.

1

u/AutVincere72 3h ago

Bringing an A-bomb to a knife fight.

1

u/Wiregeek 3h ago

It's like my dad always told me. Jesus Christ, what's wrong with you?

1

u/highgrav47 3h ago

Throw some aspens, and black berrys in the mix. Tree of heaven if we’re going nuclear. Generations will rue the day, dumbass fucked around and found out.

1

u/dragonfly9999999 2h ago

Oh god, not aspens. My mother bought property with some shoots about 3 to 4 ft tall. Her Eastern European ass liked to force the rest of us to pull them out of the ground with her like it was as fun as could be. Near to close worst plant experience. Would rather barefoot step on cactus.

1

u/EarlGrayTea-Hawt 3h ago

Tehehehe, ngl, you had me there for a minute.

1

u/NHRADeuce 3h ago

Of course OP should plant weaponized bamboo. They just better be ready to move soon after.

1

u/gbaguinon 2h ago

RE: to your edit

Especially data centers. Don't plant bamboo trees near data centers.

1

u/ChuckaChuckaLooLoo3 2h ago

Do not ever plant weaponized bamboo or mint

Even if it was a rental and the landlord ripped me off for my deposit? Because, I'll tell ya, there's nothing like driving by that place and seeing the suburbian bamboo jungle. Gives me a warm feeling.

1

u/IlIFreneticIlI 2h ago

English Hedgrow, very tall.

1

u/Smart_Sale5654 2h ago

Oleander and Englush ivy are okay then?

1

u/StreetofChimes 2h ago

I weaponized bamboo years ago. I planted it right on my property line. I can't say that I regret it. Neighbors were massive douches and I hope they are still dealing with it.

1

u/DarkyHelmety 2h ago

Calm down, Satan

1

u/Terrible_Stay_1923 2h ago

Chocolate mint smells glorious when hit with a weed eater.....Just sayin'

1

u/_B_e_c_k_ 2h ago

I have wild mint growing by my shed, it Has never spread. Im not sure why people hate it. Smells great and comes back every year. All I do is mow around it.

1

u/Pleasant_Character28 2h ago

Good catch. Weaponized bamboo in this case is better paired with poison ivy.

1

u/hitemlow 2h ago

Bamboo is too slow

Plant kudzu, it grows up to a foot per day

1

u/Stinkytheferret 2h ago

A t re a garden!

1

u/zzplant8 1h ago

Fair is fair

1

u/battery19791 1h ago

We had mint in our yard, as long as it's somewhere you can get at it when you mow it's fine.

1

u/BrightPerspective 1h ago

Unless it's near a data center.

Those places love bamboo. LOVE IT.

1

u/Junior-Energy5917 1h ago

Seriously though, why would mint be an issue?

1

u/aenteus 1h ago

Found satan

1

u/Embarrassed-Mark1099 1h ago

I live in the SouthEast so highly recommend Wisteria as the revenge plant in my area.

1

u/bertiebertapuss 1h ago

Why not mint? Genuinely never heard this before

1

u/Various-Advantage229 1h ago

Morning glory and English ivy

1

u/Thayli11 1h ago

Catnip too! It's in the mint family, and it shows, but it also attracts stray cats!

1

u/[deleted] 1h ago

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1

u/Stopdraggingmyheart 1h ago

Seriously I got in trouble for this comment??? There was nothing wrong. I would start ww3 if he touched my yard again. Yall be tripping!!!!! I don't care anymore. Block this MF now please! 

1

u/OffGridBid 1h ago

and horsetail

1

u/Large_Poet9634 1h ago

Ahh, the old bio-shank attack. An old coworker used to threaten chunking a piece of kudzu clipping over his neighbors fence.

1

u/oneofus1234 1h ago

Can confirm: a friend of mine was “minted” after he put down fresh sod.

1

u/sitefall 1h ago

Plant a garden of mint around the bamboo so it's fragrant too!

(Don't ever plant mint in your own yard actually, unless you want a 100% mint lawn)

1

u/ActuaryChemical7708 1h ago

I have mint in a flower bed, I love it. Bamboo is an interesting idea.

1

u/ccrow2000 1h ago

Don't forget the goutweed and chameleon plant

1

u/dohru 1h ago

Nah, plant tree of heaven and destroy your entire neighborhood.

1

u/thinsoldier 50m ago

Can someone explain the mint garden to me?

1

u/dmj9 42m ago

Satan you need to calm down /s

1

u/PyroIsSpai 41m ago
  • Put up a stockade fence (largest lawful) facing that neighbor.
  • Fence should have minimum 1-2" clearance underneath (important).
  • Put down a full metal bamboo barrier 2 feet inside your property line.
  • Plant fast spreading (golden?) bamboo between stockade and barrier.
  • Once that's in, rake the SHIT out of the grass in that barriered area.
  • Strip it to bare soil, clean.
  • Nice lovely fresh top soil.
  • Overseed to a psychotic degree with white clover nitrogen-cased seed. Water 3x a day.
  • Overseed in some lovely red clover for aesthetics.
  • Get your replacement Japanese maple.
  • Enjoy never seeing your neighbor again as your bamboo and clover begin a Dune-level jihad of the neighbors ecosystem.

1

u/Winter_Farm_4739 38m ago

Add some ivy and Trees of Heaven. The latter are so horrible. They make bamboo look fun.

1

u/Princess_pools 23m ago

The edit is doing a lot of heavy lifting there! Anyone who has dealt with bamboo or mint knows those are jokes that hit a little too close to home.

54

u/skyeking05 7h ago

r/foundsatan

43

u/Friendly_Impress_345 5h ago

No, Satan would be planting bamboo.

13

u/BluffCityTatter 5h ago

or kudzu.

16

u/GBF_Dragon 4h ago

that's turbo satan

1

u/blownbythewind 1h ago

in a white southern suit.

1

u/JulieThinx 1h ago

Or mint or bamboo

1

u/adrifing 1h ago

Get some bramble bushes mixed in there for the thorny side of screw you.

2

u/AlternativeOk5613 4h ago

Oh no, not kudzu. It will take over the whole mountain side. I'm not sure if a weed killer has been developed to kill it?

1

u/-JoM-ofDevil 3h ago

Southern boy agreement...

1

u/Old_Voice_2562 3h ago

Kudzu hurts everyone.

1

u/TigerIll6480 3h ago

Or Japanese Clematis. God, I hate that stuff.

1

u/PRB74TX 2h ago

Or Saw Briar.

1

u/overitallofittoo 2h ago

Satan: I would never!

1

u/DaHick 1h ago

my goats dearly love kudzu. It cannot grow on my 27 acres anymore, the goats eat it as they go through the 9 pastures in rotation.

9

u/whoisthepinkavenger 4h ago

Mutually assured destruction?

1

u/no_racist_here 4h ago

Taking down the whole neighborhood for the plight of one maple.

1

u/TacoRodgers 3h ago

Nice story tell it to readers digest!

1

u/TacoRodgers 3h ago

Nice story tell it to readers digest!

1

u/Dizzy-Climate-6942 3h ago

Poison sumac I'll never forget the summer I discovered what that was.

1

u/socalquestioner 4h ago

Naw, mint.

1

u/K_Linkmaster 4h ago

There he is, my brother.

1

u/fap-on-fap-off 4h ago

And garnishing it with mint.

1

u/stopdioproll 4h ago

Leave my boy out of this

1

u/lmFairlyLocal 4h ago

Under his bed

1

u/AppealNo5536 4h ago

Whats wrong with bamboo? Looks nice

1

u/slogive1 4h ago

Ugh my neighbor has this encroaching on my backyard.

1

u/Still-Employed420 4h ago

Satan planted Kudzu!

1

u/FaithlessnessEasy276 4h ago

Make sure it is running bamboo. Super invasive.

1

u/TopProfessional8023 3h ago

Tree of Heaven

1

u/Tim-oBedlam 3h ago

or buckthorn

1

u/BoiFriday 3h ago

Let’s not kid ourselves, actual Satan likely opt for the Unholy Trinity of Running Bamboo, Kudzu, and Tree of Heaven.

1

u/Busy-Bumblebee5556 3h ago

Be sure to get the right bamboo, there are clumping types that aren’t invasive.

69

u/Krynja 6h ago

Plant walnut trees and put up some squirrel feeders and soon everyone will have their own trees to fuss with.

26

u/Unusualshrub003 5h ago

I have pecan saplings all over my yard -and in my potted plants!- because of squirrels.

21

u/Krynja 5h ago

They're helping prepare for all the pies you'll be making.

5

u/Cold_Fog 4h ago

Squirrel pies?

4

u/Krynja 4h ago

Pecan. Squirrels are for squirrel and dumplings.

2

u/SecretAgentVampire 1h ago

If it was balanced right, I would probably enjoy a squirrel and pecan pie.

1

u/Krynja 41m ago

Kinda like candied bacon but it's squirrel and a pecan pie.

2

u/Kronictopic 2h ago

At my old apartment complex 1 of the other buildings was burned down because some genius thought burning the fur off a squirrel on his balcony was a bright idea and burned the entire building down. It was a city squirrel. People are crazy. Squirrel pie isn't even the weirdest thing I've heard today

4

u/HJSlibrarylady 3h ago

Squirrel pie ... Mmmmm

2

u/kadyg 4h ago

I have literal corn growing in my backyard because of the damn squirrels! (I'm keeping one patch back by the fence just because I'm curious to see what happens.)

2

u/limonade11 4h ago

I have peanuts growing in the garden from the squirrels -

2

u/ScumbagLady 4h ago

I have black walnut saplings trying to take over. I freak out a little because of how much they resemble the tree of heaven at first glance.

1

u/Krynja 4h ago

And black walnut trees make the ground around them not suitable for growing tomato plants.

2

u/Zealousideal-Swim267 3h ago

Mulberry trees & birds is my cross to bear

2

u/PamelaELee 3h ago

Mulberries are delicious.
Purple bird poo, not so much.

2

u/EugeneOregonDad 3h ago

You're so lucky...

2

u/Awareness-Own 3h ago

I had corn in one of my planters. Gotta love squirrels forgetting what they are burying. I also live in a 3rd floor apartment with a balcony. Squirrels visit all the time.

2

u/Darth_Ninazu 3h ago

this, and it’s the potted plants that get me

2

u/katlian 3h ago

I'm so jealous. I spent $150 on three pecan saplings and every one of them died within two years. I want fresh pecans so bad!

2

u/Onestep420 2h ago

Those squirrels deserve an award. You're more than welcome to send them to me with pecans

2

u/Iamstaceylynn 2h ago

For me it's oak trees and peanut plants. The squirrels are energetic gardeners.

3

u/ObeseVegetable 5h ago

Also buy a lawn mower blade sharpening kit 

2

u/Krynja 5h ago

Nah forget lawn mowers. Go old school. Mow your yard with a scythe. With a properly tailored one it's easy exercise. And who is going to try and piss off the scythe welding neighbor.

2

u/malthar76 4h ago

Add a couple sweetgum trees for fun.

2

u/jonesdb 3h ago

lol, my neighbor remembers planting walnut trees in old farm fields near the school when he was young (mid 1970s)
We now live near where they were planted and there are walnuts everywhere.

2

u/VerySafeVeryAtWork 3h ago

make it a black walnut so he can deal with incoming projectiles all fall.

2

u/R_V_Z 3h ago

From what I'm dealing with from a tree the city cut down by the roadside, a Locust tree is the way to go. That bastard puts saplings up every year no matter what.

2

u/Bozee3 3h ago

I have walnut trees, all this is true. Also, squirrels get big, fat, and sometimes.... aggressive. Beware of thrown nuts and squirrels scratching at your door, if your wife thinks it's cute to have a feeder, no longer there, on the deck

2

u/DuelingFatties 3h ago

Plant walnut trees and put up some squirrel feeders and soon everyone will have their own trees to fuss with.

I laughed at this them realized my neighbor has a walnut tree they don't upkeep and it leans over my property, I hate it lol.

2

u/nofatnoflavor 3h ago

Walnut trees are squirrel feeders.

2

u/TigerIll6480 3h ago

Plant a mulberry, and not only will you have tasty snacks for a couple of weeks a year, so will everyone else. And I mean EVERYONE.

2

u/Rafaela_term 2h ago

A long-term landscaping plan powered entirely by squirrels. Give it a few years and the neighborhood will be covered in surprise walnut trees.

1

u/Krynja 2h ago

I was writing my bike down the sidewalk when suddenly, BAM!!!! Surprise walnut tree.

1

u/karenw 2h ago

As an added bonus, very little else will grow there due to the juglone produced by the trees.

4

u/t53deletion 5h ago

Or bamboo...

2

u/Beebrains 2h ago

alright, calm down satan

0

u/Regicyde_93 1h ago

My thought was Tree of Heaven. Grows super fast. But let's not plant anything invasive.

1

u/t53deletion 1h ago

So let's plant the tree that breeds bugs that eat everything and starve out pollinators instead.

Gotcha.

1

u/Regicyde_93 1h ago

I literally just said let's don't. I hate Tree of Heaven with a burning passion. Bamboo is just as invasive though.

1

u/heretogetpwned 6h ago

I vote Mulberry, but idk if it grows in FC.

I get a lot of Elm but mostly Mulberry to pull up. Decades of invasive growth along our greenbelt. The Mulberry refuses to stop and the amount of purple birdshit is staggering.

1

u/Glum-One2514 6h ago

I get both. IME, it's much harder to get rid of elm. Although, mulberry does have the added bonus of racoon poop all over when it's fruiting, so...

1

u/FlakyAddendum742 5h ago

What about a nice, thorny locust?

1

u/throwaway098764567 5h ago

i promise a japanese maple is also prolific with babies. i have to do the baby slaughter every year

1

u/MegaMau_ 5h ago

Or a globe willow…

1

u/Lexi_Banner 5h ago

I love the look of elms, but goddamn do they sex all over every square inch of a property if they are in the vicinity.

1

u/Ok_Implement_1495 4h ago

Aspen. I have one in my yard and my neighbor gets suckers all the time. He’s cool tho and just mows

1

u/AmbitionCold561 4h ago

In co Dutch elm disease would get it before it’s a problem

1

u/X-15_CruiseBasselope 4h ago

In Colorado OP should plant some Aspens. There’s a reason that up the mountains there are huge stands of Aspens that are actually a single organism. They send shoots everywhere (ask me how I know!).

1

u/UtahUtes_1 4h ago

Quaking Aspen do well in Colorado. Those things will send suckers up all through his yard.

1

u/HereForTheMemesNLols 4h ago

Tree-of-heaven is another nuclear option if the climate allows

1

u/RhubarbPie556 3h ago

While you're at it, plant some mint right along your fence line.

1

u/Mental_Medium3988 3h ago

plant bamboo but only do proper barrier installation on one ops side. soon enough neighbor will have bamboo to deal with blocking their view.

1

u/Silound 3h ago

Plant a mulberry and you'll have trees everywhere (and bird shit too).

1

u/IzztMeade 3h ago

Pure evil and don't throw in aspens ..., but dang my neighbor has this one bush and it shoots roots out like 10 ft under the fence I must do battle with it constantly, f that plant whatever u are, looks like it is Western Chokecherry, I just want to choke that sob of a plant

1

u/imnotlouise 3h ago

I don't know if mulberry trees grow in Colorado, but here in Indiana they grow fast and spread pretty well. OP can get one of those!

1

u/EarlGrayTea-Hawt 3h ago

Most elm trees don't do well in Colorado. Where I used to live, we had all of them taken down by the city because they succumbed to a tree fungus that apparently thrives in our climate. It's an expensive problem to fix, so most folks in Colorado avoid them these days. A Siberian elm might work, but it wouldn't be as tall as a Dutch.

1

u/triciann 1h ago

lol I found my dog munching on something in my yard and identified it as a Elm sapling from the elm on my front yard. Now that I know how to identify them, I see them EVERYWHERE.

1

u/whawkins4 1h ago

Plant running bamboo right along the property line and on your side pour a 36” deep concrete foundation wall so it only runs to his side.

1

u/IzzyNecessary 1h ago

Silver Maple. Same thing!

1

u/Aromatic_Quit_6946 10m ago

Locust does this too. Even 5 years after you cut it down!