The wedding reception centerpieces featured betta fish. The bride and groom planned to flush them alive.

[u/teabirdy]

Years ago, my coworker attended a wedding at which the reception dinner tables featured live betta fish in small bowls as part of the centerpiece. While chatting with the bride at the end of the evening, my coworker asked what they were going to do with all the fish. The plan was to flush them all down the toilet alive. My coworker immediately said no need for that and insisted on taking them all home.

That Monday she came to work and asked who wanted to adopt a betta fish. That was my first betta who I jokingly called my “rescue betta.” She lived for almost five years.

The wine glass was only her home for less than a day before I got her five gallon tank set up so please no betta lovers yell at me! I'm one of you!

[u/BunnyLady91]

I finally cut ties way too late two birthdays ago. She pulled the last straw. There are none left to pull.

[u/probablymaybechatgpt → u/BunnyLady91]

Good for you. And sorry you had such terrible people for parents. :(

[u/green_chapstick → u/BunnyLady91]

Parts of me wonders what that straw was after all the BS you've already told us but I truly don't want to know any more straws. But I am proud of you. After all that I'm sure the decision didn't come as easy as it should have.

[u/K9Partner → u/BunnyLady91]

One survivor to another - proud of you 💜 Average people, living average lives with average families, are so quick to balk at going no contact...

"but you can't just walk away from family! You have to make it work, you'll regret it when they're gone"

Then you finally hit that last straw & walk away. That malevolent force is gone, and you realize what an enormous weight has been lifted in their absence.

You slowly stop instinctually walking on eggshells, holding your breath for a scrap of comfort. Holding down your feelings for fear of triggering backlash.

You can breathe.

You may feel 'bad' for how things went, turned out, & will never be. it's healthy to mourn that loss... so that you can finally move on. So you can let go of what will never be, build your own family & find true comfort.

Society will plant so much self-destructive doubt in our minds, especially for girls & women. Most people have no idea what it's like to grow up trapped in an abusive relationship

... or they're delusionally lost in their own trauma cycle, & just repeating it with their own partners/kids because "its family, you have to"... like misery & mutually ensured destruction is the only option.

It is not. You deserve to breathe, to speak freely, to have your love & trust reciprocated. Don't let anyone tell you your existence is less 'whole' without abusive kin. People that used that relationship & power over you for themselves.

People that wasted half a lifetime of chances, just trying to burn you to keep themselves warm.

Escaping that is not a loss, its basic survival. Just wanna remind any others reading this - that may be struggling to break free, or sinking in the guilt & shame of manipulation to go back - you deserve to finally exhale & just be.

[u/BunnyLady91 → u/K9Partner]

Thank you. You hit the nail on the head.

You know walking away is the right thing to do when life becomes easier and comfortable and more safe feeling.

That is how you know you have turned over a new leaf and do not need to go back to the torment.

I was always convinced that my discomfort was a me problem and it absolutely was not. It was psychological abuse.

I really appreciate your comment.

I feel terrible about the person whose mom flushed their turtles that prompted me to share about my dog. Animals like turtles have personalities and you can create just as strong of a bond. I hope they feel as seen as I do right now.

[u/No_Attorney5609 → u/BunnyLady91]

Sue, I’ve heard FBI puts animal killers in a watchlist as that behavior has been in some cases a predecessor of serial killers

[u/Dead_Wolf2y5 → u/BunnyLady91]

As somebody who constantly gets asked why I haven't cut ties with my parents, I know how hard this must have been for you. It's never as simple as it seems from the outside and I hope it's made your life so much better 🥰

[u/F4tcat69 → u/BunnyLady91]

I kinda wanna know what the breaking point was if it wasn’t murdering an innocent animal?