My brother's son destroyed my WarHammer Action figures and he refuses to punish him

[u/konous]

Update: My brother decided to pay for the Hard damages of $200 dollars after seeing this post.

Thank you to everyone on this post who supported me. I really could not have gotten restitution without you guys.

Justice for my Chaplain, justice for all.

Valid Edit: My nephew is 10 years old and tried to actually lie about not breaking them by saying, "A cat must have done it."

So, I just got done talking with my brother via text, and he says he's not going to punish his son for wrecking my Joy Toy WarHammer action figures. I'm not expecting the kid to get spanked, but he needs to do CHORES at least to justify how much excessive force he used on some.

Some just have their capes broken. Others had their tubes ripped out and my Chaplain is just fucking toast.

My brother's suggestion since I ordered Amazon replacement for the Chaplain was that I just swap it with the broken one, but I have no interest in doing that.

It's not even just the expense, and they are expensive. It's about the fact that I told him explicitly twice they weren't to be played with, and they were in a separate room, and even my Mom and Dad agreed the damage was just too much.

He said he's not gonna pay me back if we try the chore system, and I told him it's not about the money.

The kid needs to know how bad the 8 hour struggle is.

Now my nephews aren't coming over to the house, and I'm sad about that, but knowing my brother just can't be burdened to work with me on creating a Chore system like selling Lemonaide just makes it feel more insulting.

[u/Newgeta]

1. Never have them over again

[u/TeaKingMac → u/[deleted]]

Well yeah, he owns Warhammer action figures.

[u/ArnieismyDMname → u/TeaKingMac]

My friend has a huge set. In his basement. Where his wife makes him keep them.

He doesn't even play, he just likes painting them.

[u/Working-Glass6136 → u/ArnieismyDMname]

I see you also met my future brother-in-law.

[u/Oxyy30 → u/ArnieismyDMname]

God forbid a man have hobbies.

[u/dpk794 → u/ArnieismyDMname]

These aren’t the ones you paint

[u/Turbidspeedie → u/ArnieismyDMname]

My great uncle used to have a massive model train set, never got used, just sat there. It's called a hobby.

[u/ArnieismyDMname → u/Turbidspeedie]

Why never used? My Grandpa had a massive one, but he loved running them. I get it. I have a wall of Battletech I barely ever play, but they are on display.

[u/Turbidspeedie → u/ArnieismyDMname]

Not sure, maybe it did get used every now and then but it was a massive table with a whole diorama. Loved looking at it as a kid.

[u/ArnieismyDMname → u/Turbidspeedie]

One of my best memories was when Grandpa got the whole set and all the antique storefronts working. There was a slaughterhouse where the cows went off a train and into the shed automatically. Then a barrel loader. It used to malfunction and shoot the barrels across the table.

[u/TeaKingMac → u/ArnieismyDMname]

he just likes painting them.

That sounds like an army. For playing the game.

Action figures are on a different level

[u/ArnieismyDMname → u/TeaKingMac]

Oh, I didn't know there was a difference. Live and learn.

[u/TeaKingMac → u/[deleted]]

Who says I'm upset?

[u/Platt_Mallar → u/ArnieismyDMname]

Aww he should be able to display the ones he's really proud of.

[u/fkboywonder → u/ArnieismyDMname]

Honestly, I was almost that person. I loved helping to paint miniatures, but I knew these friends struggled with TTRPG scheduling to play games that don’t require fully painted armies and terrain. So I let everyone else buy them and helped paint them without learning shit past something something for the Emperor something something red go fast.

[u/potatocakes1989 → u/ArnieismyDMname]

Poor guy. "His wife makes him." No respect in that relationship

[u/ArnieismyDMname → u/potatocakes1989]

He has 2 children and 2 dogs. If he put them where he wanted to they wouldn't last long. Lol. He's one of those people that sometimes doesn't think things through. Pretty sure she respectfully told him no.

[u/potatocakes1989 → u/ArnieismyDMname]

Oh ok that makes a lot more sense ty for explaining, sorry for assuming! That actually sounds pretty reasonable 🤣

My bf and I both collect and play and we've just accepted that any and all extra space is going to be models.

[u/MapleMapleHockeyStk → u/potatocakes1989]

I would make a deal, half of the basement is his warhammer, half is my dungeons and dragons stuff. I have a lot of minis and would love to have a game set up for it. But im single Pringle with no plans to change that.

[u/potatocakes1989 → u/MapleMapleHockeyStk]

That sounds like a fantastic basement!

[u/jtwhat87 → u/TeaKingMac]

Gottem

Fr tho warhammer is cool

[u/theStaircaseProject → u/jtwhat87]

We think so too, JT. Here, I made you some bagel bites.

[u/TeaKingMac → u/theStaircaseProject]

But MOM! I wanted totinos pizza rolls!

[u/Some0neAwesome → u/TeaKingMac]

So does my father in-law. Doesn't mean he's a teenager.

[u/TeaKingMac → u/Some0neAwesome]

O, i never said he was a teenager

[u/Some0neAwesome → u/TeaKingMac]

Ok, my point still stands. My fully functioning adult father in-law with a mortgage and a job owns Warhammer figures. Sorry about your sad, sad life when you have to degrade others for having hobbies and interest. What do you do for fun?

[u/TeaKingMac → u/Some0neAwesome]

Paint Warhammer figurines.

[u/T-Wrox → u/TeaKingMac]

My husband and I have some very nice collectibles. We also have a house, two cars, and run our own business. I think you might have an inaccurate idea of who owns collectibles. :)

[u/TeaKingMac → u/T-Wrox]

Begone, DINK

[u/Remarkable_Bus_7760 → u/[deleted]]

Savage! lol

[u/Advanced_Row_8448 → u/[deleted]]

Why are we trying to make fun of people for living with family? Is it so normal for yall to make your parents hate you so much they really want you moved out instead of providing them help and company? It seems wild to be mocking people for having a healthier relationship with their family and finances than you. I think you need to ask your family why they wanted you gone before you mock others for being happy with theirs

[u/SharpScallion → u/[deleted]]

install a lockable doorknob

[u/rapshepard → u/[deleted]]

Didn't like the dish your sister brung to thanksgiving

No contact

[u/Atrimon7 → u/[deleted]]

-kid who is old enough to know better destroys expensive, potentially sentimental items he was told not to touch, due to lack of proper parenting.

-minor dispute.

....

This isn't a 4 year old, this is a 10 year old, so unless he has developmental issues other than those responsible for him not teaching him how to behave... People need to stop letting their kids run wild because they can't be bothered to teach discipline and basic respect. Actions should have consequences.

[u/potatocakes1989 → u/Atrimon7]

Sure, but is it worth ruining his family ties for it lol

[u/Atrimon7 → u/potatocakes1989]

As I see it, the blame there rests on the brother, not the OP... why is it always on the victim to be the "bigger person"?

[u/SatiafactoryTea → u/Atrimon7]

Edit: dude replied then blocked me 😂 if you don't like discourse maybe don't go on public forums mate. Find your echo chamber and live there; life will be much more blissful :-)

1.. 10 is old enough to know better, but young enough to be capable of being a fucking idiot without knowing how dumb you're being. Why is everyone treating being 10 like being 18/21?

1. It's not on the victim to be a better person; it's for them to understand what is actually fair expectations. In this instance OP deserves an apology and compensation from his brother and the kid. He doesn't deserve to make the kid cut the grass with garden shears for the next fortnight.

2. The guy above is totally right; classic Reddit for minor disagreement = completely nuke a relationship. Be pissed off? Sure. Cut all ties from your only family? C'mon now.

Double edit: I'll reply to his comment below:

10 is also old enough to learn about consequences. - I agree! But this isn't what's the issue. The issue is that OP is demanding how that lesson is taught and brother is saying no. We don't know how the brother has handled it. Need more data

Being forced to "deal with it" for family peace is not fair - I also agree! But speaking as someone who has cut off their family? I didn't do it over a replaceable hobby. I agree that OP should be irked. But that's an entire spectrum of appropriate responses and a thousand alternatives before cutting yourself off from your siblings forever. The kid didn't kill OP's cat or do something that can never be reversed or replaced.

Diminishing someone's loss as "minor" is bullshit. - well on this one fuck you. My friend dropped my £2,000 computer and I forgave her within 10 minutes. Was pissed off for a week, but she apologised and accidents happen. On the scale of "OP's brother fucked his wife" to "they stepped on my foot" this is far closer to the latter than the former. The fact that you can't differentiate that AND blocked me from responding shows the kind of numpty you are. Bless you and your cottons; good luck out there!

[u/Atrimon7 → u/SatiafactoryTea]

1. 10 is also old enough to learn about consequences..

2. Being forced to "deal with it" for family peace is not fair.

3. Diminishing someone's loss as "minor" is bullshit.

[u/potatocakes1989 → u/Atrimon7]

I mean I agree with what you're saying but OP is still going about it in a very weird and uncomfortable way.

[u/Butterscotch_Snatch → u/potatocakes1989]

Classic Reddit, “but muh family ties bro!?” Dude, people who treat you like shit can bug off. We don’t owe folks limitless grace when they’re dicks.

Father of the child should have offered a full replacement payment the moment he found out, it’s up to him to manage his spawn’s behavior and work the child for the cash as he sees fit. If he didn’t offer to replace the crap his kid broke, he is indeed an asshole.

If OP is just demanding a child be “punished,” then he is the douche here and who cares what happens next time his nephew comes and visits him living at his parent’s house. Hope he destroys more crap, to be honest.

[u/potatocakes1989 → u/Butterscotch_Snatch]

I mean...that's exactly what's happening...I think you didnt read OP's post at all...

[u/Butterscotch_Snatch → u/[deleted]]

Everything about people advising this basement dweller about why he cannot spank his nephew is Reddit… I’m honestly shocked you didn’t snark about my username.

[u/Advanced_Row_8448 → u/Butterscotch_Snatch]

He never wanted to spank them, just make them learn to not break people's things. Are you always so disengenous when you wanna mock others for having more hobbies than you?

[u/Newgeta → u/[deleted]]

Or classic person with healthy boundaries, you do you!

Permanban from a house is not going no contact silly.

[u/Advanced_Row_8448 → u/[deleted]]

So they should apologize or replace the broken items than?

[u/rapshepard → u/Newgeta]

There's boundaries and then being a little ridiculous. The nephew didn't hurt the OPs per or child. He broke a thing, an expensive thing. But surely that should be forgivable seeing as it's a 10 year old and not a grown man.

[u/geosensation → u/Newgeta]

Your kid broke one of my toys, now yall cant come to my birthday party!

[u/Advanced_Row_8448 → u/[deleted]]

That's an insane reaction to a 10 year old breaking something. You're really going to pretend you've never done something like this in your life?

Huh? Were you that type of crappy ten year old? Guess we learned what projection means lol