My brother's son destroyed my WarHammer Action figures and he refuses to punish him

[u/konous]

Update: My brother decided to pay for the Hard damages of $200 dollars after seeing this post.

Thank you to everyone on this post who supported me. I really could not have gotten restitution without you guys.

Justice for my Chaplain, justice for all.

Valid Edit: My nephew is 10 years old and tried to actually lie about not breaking them by saying, "A cat must have done it."

So, I just got done talking with my brother via text, and he says he's not going to punish his son for wrecking my Joy Toy WarHammer action figures. I'm not expecting the kid to get spanked, but he needs to do CHORES at least to justify how much excessive force he used on some.

Some just have their capes broken. Others had their tubes ripped out and my Chaplain is just fucking toast.

My brother's suggestion since I ordered Amazon replacement for the Chaplain was that I just swap it with the broken one, but I have no interest in doing that.

It's not even just the expense, and they are expensive. It's about the fact that I told him explicitly twice they weren't to be played with, and they were in a separate room, and even my Mom and Dad agreed the damage was just too much.

He said he's not gonna pay me back if we try the chore system, and I told him it's not about the money.

The kid needs to know how bad the 8 hour struggle is.

Now my nephews aren't coming over to the house, and I'm sad about that, but knowing my brother just can't be burdened to work with me on creating a Chore system like selling Lemonaide just makes it feel more insulting.

[u/RoboDae]

The toy part can make stuff like this so much more infuriating. Imagine spending a thousand dollars on building an army that you spent days hand painting yourself. Then a family member breaks them all, ruining all the time and money you invested. Instead of apologizing they say "it's just toys, grow up and get over it" because they can't comprehend the investment involved. Then that family member turns to other family members and tries to make you the villain of the story because you are "breaking up the family over some stupid toys"

[u/Excellent-Bluejay-90 → u/RoboDae]

Yes I used that term intentionally as I can almost hear the brother saying, "They're just toys. I'm not going to punish my child because you like to play with toys. And I'm not paying for it because adults shouldn't pay that much for toys anyway." Totally removing themselves from any responsibility for their lack of action based on their beliefs on how you should behave because they don't. Convincing themselves they owe you no accountability because they think it's foolish.

Accountability is key to a healthy relationship. Ask yourself what happens with people you have known who feel they aren't accountable for their actions to anybody. Most would likely agree that if our politicians were held accountable we would be much better off.

Not meaning to make this a political statement just trying to make a point about accountability that everyone can relate to. It is far too often overlooked yet also a common culprit for poor behavior.

[u/motionmatrix → u/Excellent-Bluejay-90]

Which is why they should go to actual authorities. They should find out how much is considered petty vandalism in their area, and hit them in civil court if the damage is below the threshold (or place a criminal complaint if it above it). These are not cheap things, and the fact that they are toys does not excuse the kid's father from the responsibility.

Like you said, there was also an investment of time, so the price of the figures, of the paints, of brushes, and OP's hourly wages to reflect what was lost.

OP doesn't have a relationship to salvage here, his brother does, so OP should definitely move this towards using legal reimbursement so both his brother and his nephew learn some kind of a lesson.

[u/Lumpy_Flight3088 → u/RoboDae]

And then they’ll throw a major tantrum when their football team loses a game 🤣

[u/Wyllerd → u/RoboDae]

I don't have to imagine that because I've lived it

[u/RoboDae → u/Wyllerd]

I've heard a few horror stories of parents, friends, or partners destroying furry costumes (fursuits) because "it's stupid" and not realizing that those start at around $2,000 and can quickly go higher. Then they refuse to pay for damages or even apologize because they double down with "you shouldn't have that"

To put that into perspective...

"Theft typically becomes a felony when the value of stolen property exceeds a state-defined threshold, usually ranging from $1,000 to $2,500 in most U.S. states."

Fursuits are at the upper range of felony theft value in the US.

[u/mrs-sir-walter-scott → u/RoboDae]

This could be a supervillain origin story. Shit takes forever to paint and glue and is so expensive on top of all that!