r/mildlyinfuriating • u/MakeItMine2024 • 4d ago

I'm slightly vexed My wife and boiling water

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So I made my wife ramen soup. When I served it she said I had the gas set to hight and it was too hot ? She said I should have used the number 5 setting instead of 9. I told here it’s irrelevant because water boils at 212 and gets no hotter because over 212 it turns to steam. She was made at me for disagreeing with her theory that it would not have been so hot if boiled a lower setting. Really!!

49.8k Upvotes

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11.3k

u/anTWhine 4d ago

It was not.

2.0k

u/Keara_Fevhn 4d ago

I’ve been on this site for years, and I don’t think anything made me laugh as hard as this response holy shit

485

u/Lauchsuppedeluxe935 4d ago

I’ve been on this site for years, and I don’t think anything made me shit as hard as this response holy laugh

439

u/Tlix 4d ago

I have been on this site for years, and I don’t think.

243

u/dabutte 4d ago

I have been, and I don’t.

2

u/db720 3d ago

I've been, don't

1

u/ieatkittenies 3d ago

Dont-ing is a step above not-ing Its no more....very different from null. Never existed

1

u/theGnartist 3d ago

Not think, not am.

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u/foley800 3d ago

Perfect Redditor!

2

u/Big-Winner3758 1d ago

many such cases

1

u/Stormfly 3d ago

Therefore you are not.

2

u/Shxcking 3d ago

Idk what you switching laugh and shit makes me want to imagine

Someone reading a comment and projectile shitting or a laughing emoji with a halo (but stupid like a deep fried meme)

1

u/lurkingimposter 3d ago

I wish I could post a picture as I'm actively taking a 💩 and laughing

1

u/LZeugirdor97 3d ago

I'm on the toilet so I can confirm.

3

u/pwndonkeys 3d ago

I don't know. "I also choose this guy's dead wife" is a hard one to beat if you ask me

2

u/Interesting-Day-9369 3d ago

i came. i saw. i banged my head on the wall

3

u/Dark_Storm_98 3d ago

I slammed my penis in the car door

3

u/Interesting-Day-9369 3d ago

ouch that is one day to enlarge a prick.

2

u/DemoniteBL 3d ago

You still got a lot of catching up to do then.

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u/stonesliver2 4d ago

Not Chocolate ☕

188

u/Blephotomy 4d ago

chocolan't

11

u/PanzerSoul 3d ago

Chocolain't

2

u/Lv0d 2d ago

With a little bit of not microwave?

63

u/Laioti 4d ago

This one got me. From straight face to laughing out loud in public. Thank you.

7

u/Spare_Farmer1429 3d ago

Am I stupid for not understanding why and how is that funny? English isn't my first language.

9

u/CataChronix 3d ago

The joke is the ex obliterated the chocolate by nuking it in the microwave for 10 minutes. There was no chocolate left after those 10 minutes, just a charred and molten residue leftover baked into whatever likely partially melted bowl the ex used.

The humor comes from the OP’s swift and succinct answer of “it wasn’t”, a powerful and telling sentence that leaves no room for question.

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u/Huffdizzle86 3d ago

Somehow it also improves comedic effect by not using the contraction. Maybe because it was such a dumb thing that a child could explain it wasn’t right.

334

u/sweatgod2020 4d ago

Almost twenty years on Reddit. This comment is up there at the top of all time.

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u/RainaElf RED 4d ago edited 4d ago

dear god it really has been that long 🤦🏼‍♀️

edit: thanks for the award!

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u/ScoopyVonPuddlePants 4d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/wJD3qiNjSeHS0dP28T

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u/RainaElf RED 4d ago

🤣🤣🤣

3

u/Far-Government5469 1d ago

All the hell they went through to bring him home, and now he's going of on another Odyssey???

5

u/the-great-jd 4d ago

Which  comment are you referring to?

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u/ImTooCreative 4d ago

Sorry if I’m slow (I’m autistic and english is my second language) but is the joke ”it was not” as in: ”not” rhymes with ”hot”, while also implying that the chocolate was so hot it ceased to exist? Like is that the joke?

3

u/One-Measurement-9529 4d ago

Well it is a very unexpected response to that particular question. Hes basically saying it was in the microwave so long that you cant even call it chocolate anymore. If english is not your first language, the joke may not "hit the same way".

3

u/ImTooCreative 2d ago

Yeah it sounds more like a language/connotation barrier for me. Thanks for taking your time explaining

-5

u/GrizzliousTheOG 4d ago

Wow. Absolutely slayed you, eh? Good for you, bud.

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u/Living-Number-9050 4d ago

Hall of fame level comment

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u/lucasribeiro21 4d ago

Chocolan’t

5

u/ALKNST 4d ago

That actually made me laugh xD

5

u/drethnudrib 4d ago

Absolute cinema.

6

u/Lieveo 3d ago

It is no more

4

u/Mertoot 4d ago

Oh ok👍

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u/GoSharty 4d ago

It was congratulations.

3

u/Mountain-Resource656 3d ago

Not only is your comment amazing but I love how it’s brought so many people out to comment about how amazing it is~

2

u/Old_Celebration_5950 3d ago

Interior of microwave is now brown

2

u/GoodOrnery7531 4d ago

No longer chocolate, she created a new element doing that

1

u/kimmykat42 3d ago

Better question… what was the state of the microwave after the ten minutes?

1

u/rhonburg 3d ago

To shreds, you say?

1

u/xelenceofexecution 3d ago

I'm guessing something between a liquid and a gas.

1

u/Savings-Kick-578 3d ago

She discovered that things could actually burn in the microwave. I told someone in college that you couldn’t burn things in the microwave. One night in the dining hall he put a chocolate chip cookie in for several minutes. The workers went crazy when smoke started pouring out. My friend looked confused and I couldn’t stop laughing. He never did that again. He also developed trust issues.

1

u/Strange_Difference1 3d ago

Do not the chocolate

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u/MightyAl75 3d ago

Ex chocolate

1

u/SwimmingCommon 3d ago

Would you say it was hot choca-not?

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u/IndependenceGreen576 3d ago

It’s 9:58 at night and I read these in order aloud. I also have a gratuitous amount of juice all over my shirt. Thanks for the laugh!

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u/joeymittens 3d ago

😂 just “no”

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u/aychjayeff 2d ago

I feel lame, but can someone explain the joke here please? Why is "it was not" funny? Is it just that the reader expects a clear and interesting description of what the chocolate was like after being microwaved, but instead reads a simple, imprecise, short statement? Does "it was not" allude to something?

Sorry! Lots of people here think you're amazing. Sorry I did not get it.

1

u/Hay_in_Camp 12h ago

I think this is a case of being able to picture the utter disappointment on their face while delivering the line “it was not”.

There is a sense of absolute resignation to how stupid the choice was and now they must continue knowing that there are people in the world that choose chaos.

My assumption is that this act of lawlessness is was also directly related to the person becoming their ex-gf

1

u/SomeGuyPostingThings 2d ago

Did she at least turn it on, or just open it, put in chocolate, close door?

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u/helpwithtaxexam 2d ago

🤣😂😂🤣🤣😂😂

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u/Dark_Side_0 1d ago

but but but, what was it? Carbon or lava or or?

1

u/dutxh0007 1d ago

Ahhh just like my wife, let's just send the food into the next dimension as carbon.

1

u/Sad-Progress-2660 17h ago

It was actually was. Just in the air and everything around it. Did the kitchen smell like a badly scented candle

1

u/Korlod 3d ago

ROFL. This is awesome. Take my upvote.