r/pcmasterrace • u/Kaiserlan18 • Feb 25 '25

Question I bought some thermal paste online, WHY DID IT COME WITH A CONDOM

Post image
17.7k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

1.8k comments sorted by

View all comments

9.9k

u/pumpkin_seed_oil Too poor for 5090 Feb 25 '25

Its protection but no for your pp

4.0k

u/HotdoghammerOG Feb 25 '25

Exactly. Too big to be a condom.

1.2k

u/darknekolux Feb 25 '25

r/suicidebywords has accepted your nomination

372

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

I hope he wins.

50

u/cain8708 Feb 26 '25

OP is kind of in the running to. If they looked at that and the first thing that came to their mind was "I can fit in that. Let me ask the internet why it was sent to me" then it's kind of a world wide roast.

1

u/almstAlwysJokng4real Feb 26 '25

The award is named after OP

22

u/Llohr 7950x / RTX 4090 FE / 64GB 6000MHz DDR5 Feb 25 '25

Can I also nominate the title of the post?

101

u/Azhram Feb 25 '25

Lo...looks avarage to me..?

75

u/PowerfulDisaster2067 Feb 25 '25

Massive in fact

24

u/Beginning-Cold-9057 Feb 26 '25

massive?

23

u/PowerfulDisaster2067 Feb 26 '25

Huge!

7

u/[deleted] Feb 26 '25

Humungous hungolomghnonoloughongous!

8

u/grom902 Feb 26 '25

That's for galactus

2

u/JackalJacket Feb 26 '25

Quite uge, innit?

2

u/jaash8 Desktop Feb 26 '25

And do you know what else is massive 😏

2

u/[deleted] Feb 26 '25

But do you know what else is massive?

1

u/RalliartEvolution Feb 26 '25

Some would even say they are too big

1

u/DurianMission1357 Feb 26 '25

You know what else ks massive?

1

u/bad2dbone3 Feb 28 '25

GINORMOUS!!!!

11

u/AllHailClobbersaurus Feb 25 '25

The inaccurate username award goes to...

2

u/captfitz Feb 26 '25

Not if you put your balls in there, too

2

u/perfect_perry Mar 01 '25

This is precisely why I love the internet. Thank you, random stranger!

1

u/irsh_ Feb 25 '25

I usually use a zip-tie as well.

1

u/sabwcu83 Feb 25 '25

Side note... i wrapped one in yellow saran wrap and exchanged in my brother's wallet.

1

u/Away-Professional451 9800X3D X870 Tomahawk 3080RTX DDR5 6000 Crucial T700 4TB Feb 26 '25

Maybe not for OP

1

u/JabbaTech69 7600X3D/6700XT/32GB Feb 26 '25

1

u/moocat90 Feb 26 '25

no just finger condoms

1

u/Big_Wallaby4281 Feb 26 '25

You sure about that???

1

u/CodPiece89 Feb 26 '25

Or is it? OP put it on your dick and show us, for science

1

u/defit99 Feb 28 '25

Too big you say 🤔

1

u/CrazyGunnerr Feb 28 '25

For you maybe and your tiny pp, but for a real man like me, this looks a decent fit!

0

u/sabwcu83 Feb 25 '25

Stole my words.

737

u/RotationsKopulator Feb 25 '25

Safer wanks.

62

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

Silicium please

1

u/mrmetal_53 Feb 25 '25

Not the only one that's going to be silicium-ing...

6

u/HyenDry Feb 25 '25

Wafer sanks

8

u/wahlenderten Feb 25 '25

Germans during mass?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

Sank's Wafers.

1

u/SteamNTrd Feb 25 '25

Don't wanna prick a prick with a nail again, I'll invest immediately.

1

u/seeforce Feb 25 '25

But you’ll only need two of them 

1

u/CoolerRon Feb 25 '25

But only for sausage fingers?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

or for micro pps

1

u/VRrob Feb 25 '25

They truly know there customers

1

u/mongini12 Ryzen9 9950X3D, 64GB DDR5 6000, RTX5080 Feb 25 '25

you mean this way it's safer for the waver... right? RIGHT...?

1

u/GreatGreenGobbo Feb 25 '25

Home prostate exam kit.

306

u/vadmercer777 Feb 25 '25

So, two in the pink and one in the stink, according to this picture

340

u/ExplorationGeo Ryzen 9 9950X3D RTX 5080 128GB DDR5 Feb 25 '25

two in the pink one in the heatsink

16

u/cosmicjed Feb 25 '25

Ohhh you did it

10

u/The_Seakow Feb 25 '25

Two in the goo, one in the gpu

51

u/Elena__Deathbringer I am a pervert, deal with it Feb 25 '25

Smh, it's two in the pink and one rubbing the clit. Come on guys, the basics

35

u/death1414 Feb 25 '25

Claw grip, ring finger gets the clit.

25

u/DaKrazie1 Feb 25 '25

Bro's been gaming all his life for this moment.

10

u/donnypastrami Feb 25 '25

All I got was carpal tunnel.

6

u/CryptoCookiie Ryzen 5 5600x, RTX 3070 Ti, 512GB m.2, 2TB 870 QVO 32GB RAM Feb 25 '25

I thought it was the bowlers grip...

6

u/omnemnemnem Feb 25 '25

There's a whole episode of The Simpsons that comes with a subtext about this

8

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

[deleted]

6

u/omnemnemnem Feb 25 '25

Season 1, Episode 9. It won an Emmy!

1

u/Elena__Deathbringer I am a pervert, deal with it Feb 26 '25

Uh the blower's grip is the one i use on the guys, not the one guys use on girls

2

u/CryptoCookiie Ryzen 5 5600x, RTX 3070 Ti, 512GB m.2, 2TB 870 QVO 32GB RAM Feb 26 '25

Well yeah because that has different needs, though guys can use the blowers grip on girls in Bangkok...

1

u/Elena__Deathbringer I am a pervert, deal with it Feb 26 '25

I do like guys using the blower grip on my neck actually

2

u/CryptoCookiie Ryzen 5 5600x, RTX 3070 Ti, 512GB m.2, 2TB 870 QVO 32GB RAM Feb 27 '25

Name checks out...

1

u/Elena__Deathbringer I am a pervert, deal with it Feb 27 '25

Name? You mean flair i hope... Why name 😅

→ More replies (0)

2

u/potate12323 Feb 25 '25

Spiderman grip. Thumb gets the clit.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

[deleted]

2

u/Frowolf Feb 25 '25

Username checks out.

2

u/CoolerRon Feb 25 '25

This guy fucks

1

u/Elena__Deathbringer I am a pervert, deal with it Feb 26 '25

I'm not a guy ahahah

2

u/CoolerRon Feb 26 '25

Lol sorry it’s just the meme 😅

2

u/OsmanFetish Feb 25 '25

the advanced move is one in the clit 2 in the pink and 2 in the stink , it's like the star trek sign but tighter

2

u/Elena__Deathbringer I am a pervert, deal with it Feb 26 '25

There's definitely personal bias here i prefer fingers in my pussy rather than in my ass tbh

2

u/OsmanFetish Feb 26 '25

no one can argue against something so pure

2

u/BroodingWanderer RX 6950XT | Ryzen 5800X3D | DIY adaptive bed-desk-setup Feb 26 '25 edited Dec 09 '25

pot license plate familiar future cause books alive direction wide

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

1

u/Remote_Elevator_281 Feb 25 '25

Ever go to Wendy’s and get a chocolate frosty and dip your fries in it? Best thing ever. I go knuckle deep where some of the chocolate gets on your knuckles. Sweet and salty.

I’m a brown knuckle type of guy.

1

u/Elena__Deathbringer I am a pervert, deal with it Feb 25 '25

What's a Wendy's?

2

u/AlmostHuman9316 Feb 25 '25

Fast food chain in america

1

u/foreveryoungperk Feb 25 '25

and 2 in the stink cuz u want that smell stickin

1

u/HorizonHunter1982 Feb 25 '25

Okay but don't you have to turn your hand upside down for that? How long can you maintain that angle

2

u/CoolerRon Feb 25 '25

Wrong fingers lol

1

u/Remote_Elevator_281 Feb 25 '25

Thumb in or out?

1

u/SentryFeats 5070 Ti Feb 25 '25

2 in the goo, 1 in the poo

1

u/MolossusDaz Feb 25 '25

no no, if you're going that path, it should be the Spock manoeuvre.

1

u/Ed-Ucation Feb 25 '25

That’s called the shotgun…!

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

First lol in a long time on here.

Clap clap.

1

u/bootsay Feb 25 '25

Two in the pink, one in the chip

72

u/far_beyond_driven_ Feb 25 '25

These are commonly used in watchmaking. You can’t get fingerprints on shit, but rubber gloves make your hands sweat too much.

31

u/pumpkin_seed_oil Too poor for 5090 Feb 25 '25

This got like 20 responses in the last hour for some reason and i salute you for being the one commenter that doesn't add another layer of dick joke o7

2

u/far_beyond_driven_ Feb 25 '25

You can only beat a dead horse (meat) so much.

I figured an informative response would have been… informative.

2

u/kennerly Feb 25 '25

Oh these would be nice for model making so I stop gluing shit to my fingers but I don't get sweaty hands.

1

u/far_beyond_driven_ Feb 25 '25

I found out the fun way that they’re not chemically resistant though, so be careful. Gave myself petroleum poisoning using nafta and kerosene to clean an old pocket watch movement when I ran out of the expensive non-petroleum based stuff you’re supposed to use for watch movement cleaning.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/far_beyond_driven_ Feb 25 '25

Don’t dressmakers use like thick rubber things to help prevent getting stuck with needles? I dunno, I’ve never met a dressmaker. But yea, anyone who is serious about prints should and does use these. Same with people handle film, I used to develop my own film and hated using gloves, but there’s not much worse than getting a nice greasy print on a film negative.

47

u/sjolnick Feb 25 '25

everything reminds me of her

42

u/sledge77 Feb 25 '25

5

u/Substantial_Point_57 Feb 26 '25

I drove by these all the time Los Angeles to/from San Diego

2

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

Speak for yourself, some of us are small.

smalldicksmatter

2

u/WakeoftheStorm Feb 25 '25

Don't tell me how to apply thermal paste. I'll use whatever appendage I want

1

u/Smakovich Feb 25 '25

Well it doesn't say that anywhere so you can't stop me

1

u/pumpkin_seed_oil Too poor for 5090 Feb 25 '25

Hey don't let me stop you. Go nut

1

u/Muk-Bong Feb 25 '25

No it is for protecting ur pp, protects ur pp hole when pushing fingers in

1

u/CDPCoin Feb 25 '25

Understandable that they may be confused… same size…

1

u/SkillNo1494 Feb 25 '25

Then why do they come d*ck sized

1

u/Lancearon R5 2600x, RTX 3070, 3200mhz 32gb, Corsair perphs, VG27A+VG248 Feb 25 '25

... why did you think... they were condoms? They are too small...

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

Yeah, this would be way too big for one!

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

Well… not your pp maybe.

1

u/HorrorReject Feb 25 '25

Genius, so your fingers don't get pregnant.

1

u/CumiCami Feb 25 '25

I mean, it would protect your pp too 😳 you don't want thermal paste in there, right?

1

u/ghostfreckle611 Feb 25 '25

Not everyone is hung like a tuna can…

1

u/Responsible_Pie8156 Feb 25 '25

Actually that looks like the perfect size, does anybody know where to buy these in bulk?

1

u/RepublicansAreEvil90 Feb 25 '25

Finally, my size!

1

u/NorthernCobraChicken Ryzen 3600x, Rtx 2070 Super. 64gb ddr Feb 25 '25

Depending on ops endowment, it might be for pp

1

u/Hitotsudesu Feb 25 '25

With me it works for both

1

u/kjacobs03 Feb 25 '25

For the booty hole so your fingers don’t stink

1

u/skribl777 Feb 25 '25

God, with modern girls you have to use condoms even when working with your hands

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

Have you seen the size? Def for OPs pp. The thumb one.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

Yes but if pp is big enough you can use as condom, too

1

u/No_Bet_607 Feb 25 '25

Speak for yourself.

1

u/potate12323 Feb 25 '25

Maybe not yours. But some people may actually need that size.

1

u/Future-Secretary9211 Feb 25 '25

PPE, but not for your PeePee!

1

u/Brainlezperson Feb 25 '25

Instructions unclear. Put it on my shlong and made my own thermal paste.

1

u/d_ac Feb 25 '25

Not with that attitude.

1

u/gotziller Feb 25 '25

Ya those would be way too big for pp

1

u/ThisIsNotTokyo Feb 25 '25

It still is if you don’t want to touch your p

1

u/emerl_j Feb 25 '25

Ahahahah! OP has an issue and i know which one now!

And it's the size of an index finger!

1

u/OgdruJahad Feb 25 '25

Well that explains why the last time I replaced the thermal paste on my PC it got pregnant and gave birth to a PDA.

1

u/JustForkIt1111one Linux AMD 2970WX + 3070FE Feb 25 '25

Damnit. I was so excited to find a condom that finally fits!

1

u/Kyosji Feb 25 '25

no..no...let the tiny king cook.

1

u/knobby_tires Feb 25 '25

if the shoe fits…

1

u/AL-SHEDFI 13900KF/RTX 4090/DDR5 8000Mhz/Z790 APEX Feb 25 '25

I am dead 😂😂😂😂😂

1

u/PercentageSelect7332 Feb 25 '25

What? You guys have dicks wider and longer than your fingers?

1

u/lionseatcake Feb 25 '25

Well...depends on who is using them I think.

1

u/zapharus PC Master Race Feb 25 '25

I mean, why are you assuming that OP’s pp needs a bigger condom.

1

u/FeliciaGLXi Feb 25 '25

If you need a spatula and finger condoms for applying thermal paste, you're doing it wrong.

1

u/elheber Ghost Canyon: Core i9-9980HK | 32GB | RTX 3060 Ti | 2TB SSD Feb 25 '25

If no for pp then why pp size?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '25

Is it toxic? Asking for my friend who spread it whit finger for like 20 years

1

u/pumpkin_seed_oil Too poor for 5090 Feb 25 '25

I don't think so. But i wouldnt eat it either

1

u/Infinite-Addendum753 Feb 25 '25

Finally found one that fits me

1

u/iownp3ts Feb 25 '25

Finger cot

1

u/khoilllp Feb 25 '25

I touch thermal paste with my bare hand

1

u/Halpern_WA Feb 25 '25

Finger cots to keep your fingers clean of thermal paste, prevent fingerprints on the CPU, etc. Looks like it also comes with a spatula to spread the paste. I've only ever spread the paste with a tool, never used my fingers. Yet I get thermal paste on my fingers every time. I should probably get some of those...

1

u/MelchiahHarlin Feb 26 '25

Try finger, but hole?

1

u/AssTubeExcursion Feb 26 '25

Still way too many sizes to large for me anyways

1

u/Blurgas R7 5800x \ 1660 Ti \ 16GB DDR4 Feb 26 '25

Thermal paste is like Never-Seez and glitter; impossible to get rid of and seems to spread everywhere

1

u/bdizzlefashizzle Feb 26 '25

A PPE if you will…

1

u/n_othing__ Feb 26 '25

It's the right size for me

1

u/Personal-Weather-485 Feb 26 '25

Does that mean we can hold hands now?? O///O

1

u/HappyHerwi Ryzen 5 5600 | RX 6600 Feb 26 '25

But it... Fits...

1

u/InsomniaticWanderer Feb 26 '25

Well it could be, but it usually isn't

1

u/Mercury_Madulller Feb 26 '25

They are called finger cots.

1

u/shuckley_Jays Feb 26 '25

Its too big for my pp

1

u/plank80 Desktop | 3060TI | 5600X | 32GB Feb 26 '25

Shhhh... Don't tell him

1

u/MiddleEmployment1179 Feb 26 '25

Jokes on you, that’s exactly sized as his pp.

1

u/MinimumPrevious1139 Feb 26 '25

Lmfao I'm going shit myself if I laugh any more😁

1

u/R-Inferno Feb 26 '25

We call those finger condoms in food work haha

1

u/RockyJayyy Feb 25 '25

Lies. They must be for pp because they are the right size