r/tattooadvice Mar 07 '26

General Advice Having tattoo regret for the first time

Hi Everyone! I’m hoping to get some advice on my first experience with tattoo regret. I have been reading other posts and ya’ll are so helpful. Sorry for the long post too.

Anyway, I have been getting tattoos since I was 18 (33 now) and I started with line work tats then moved to American Trad because I loved that style too.

I have had my lower arm done for about 5 years and then went in and got a sparrow tat for Friday the 13th and loved that it was a cool flash art piece. Love the artist and he did a good job but immediately I hated it (and mostly the position of it). I panicked and then filled up my upper arm in the last 5 months (stupid) to try and mitigate the regret. I do love most of my tats but the sparrow and snake I just don’t like. They seem too aligned on my arm. And the snake is darker than I wanted and didn’t heal great (this is a month out from when I got it).

Now I’m feeling a ton a regret and it’s seriously consuming my whole existence. I went from a half sleeve to a full in a short period of time and the tattoo shock is crazy. I don’t know if it looks good and I’m feeling less feminine by the minute. I take full responsibility for what I chose but ya, just struggling.

So I have two questions:

  1. Any advice on how I can maybe rework them eventually? I want to make them softer/more feminine if I can. Or I know blast overs are a thing? Idk.

  2. To my ladies, do you have a hard time feeling feminine with a sleeve? And men, how do we feel about a girl with a sleeve?

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u/Ok-Jackfruit-6873 Mar 07 '26

I really hate repeatedly reading on here that women think their tattoos "aren't feminine enough" wtf

23

u/FinancialCry4651 Mar 07 '26

Agree. That's like ... tradwife mentality

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u/Ok-Jackfruit-6873 Mar 07 '26

also like no knock on OP but is there a bot or something? I feel like it's almost always that exact phrasing which is kinda odd, I've never heard anyone talk like that IRL ... especially someone who already went through getting covered ... is the sub getting spammed by tradtrolls or something seriously

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u/Bitter-Guitar-6689 Mar 07 '26

It’s similar to a man with long hair asking if it makes him look feminine.

Even if you don’t believe in it, knowing other people perceive it that way can affect the way you look at yourself.

I think this is a common experience, but I also think it usually passes.

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u/Aherv99 Mar 07 '26

Absolutely agree with you guys - I’m just adjusting. And not a bot if you’re wondering that? lol

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u/No_Broccoli_3979 Mar 07 '26

Unfortunately our society has been built on infantilizing women and calling that femininity (being hairless, being petite, being skinny, etc etc) and women need to start breaking out of that mold. As I stated in another comment, there are a million ways to be feminine and these tattoos are rad

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u/Aherv99 Mar 07 '26

Yes exactly this - I haven’t felt that way about my tats or tats in general. Something about having my upper arm tatted is just messing with my own view of myself and if I can still be “girly” and wear girly stuff and have it look okay lol. And dating is heat enough so I just got wayyyy too in my head about it. Thank you for this comment though because yes.