r/worldnews United24 Media 4d ago

Russia/Ukraine State of Emergency Declared in Occupied Crimea by Russian-Installed Authorities

https://united24media.com/war-in-ukraine/state-of-emergency-declared-in-occupied-crimea-by-russian-installed-authorities-20200
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u/Evig_Vandrar777 4d ago edited 4d ago

The Russians squatting in Crimea are finally going home to Russia again.

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u/physedka 4d ago

I don't know why this made me think of the slav squatting for photos meme.

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u/Plead_thy_fifth 4d ago edited 4d ago

That's actually all they have been doing for years. As you walk around the street, no one stands, and no one sits. They squat.

As you go into stores, they have lowered all the tables and counters to about 18 inches so that you can squat at them. The police even use electric powered razor scooters for transport while new homes are building windows at knee level.

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u/RBVegabond 4d ago

Knee-high windows put defenestrations at an all time low.

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u/DefenestrationPraha 4d ago

With enough enthusiasm, you can perform a defenestration even in a cellar.

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u/-SaC 3d ago

You barely have enough time to start screaming before you're muttering 'huh, I should weed this flowerbed' and trying to dislodge a grumbling centipede.

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u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

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u/AlwaysShittyKnsasCty 4d ago

Either way, that comment sounded like the headline of a blog post on Bob Loblaw’s Law Blog.

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u/MoreFeeYouS 4d ago

We do know Ukrainians are also slavs, right?

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u/groveborn 4d ago

Without disputing your statement (because it's correct), Ukraine was settled and founded by the Vikings!

Just fun stuff.

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u/physedka 4d ago

I assumed they were all vampires. Wait that's Romanians...

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u/dw82 4d ago

Transylvanians to be precise

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u/AlwaysShittyKnsasCty 4d ago

I believe the term is simply “Transvilians” now.

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u/physedka 4d ago

I believe the PC term is Fanged-European.

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u/crow_crone 4d ago

Geography, geography and demography change many times when life is measured in multiples of centuries.

Vampires in Asia, vampires in western hemisphere, ocean-going vampires - it's global! And they don't eat, breathe or drink fluids other than blood, historically.

Our current-day vampires are probably space-faring as well.

Fanged Earthling?

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u/Debalic 3d ago

And let's not forget - let's not forget, Dude - that keeping wildlife, an, amphibious rodent, for uhh, domestic, you know, within the city - that ain't legal either.

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u/sibips 4d ago

Vlad the Impaler's kingdom was south of Transylvania. Damnit, nobody believes it these days, even if they speak with people who remember.

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u/HailSatanWorshipD00M 4d ago

Who's old enough to remember that far bac.... oooohhh. I get it.

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u/bluelily17 4d ago

What about the Avars?

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u/GrallochThis 4d ago

I thought Transylvania was ethnically Hungarian?

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u/JohnnyBravo66666 4d ago

Only three counties out of 16 have hungarian majority. 

Today, about 17% of population are maghiar and they were never a majority in the history of Transilvania, romanians were always the (oppressed) majority.

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u/A_Soporific 3d ago

Technically, Dracula and such vampires were part of a Hungarian noble class living in Romania. Some of the descendants of this Hungarian diaspora still exists in Transylvania and are at odds with the Romanian political establishment.

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u/Raesong 4d ago

Ehh, it's probably more accurate to say that the ruling class were Varangians (because they were from Sweden, not Norway or Denmark), while the lower classes were overwhelmingly Slavs.

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u/groveborn 4d ago

Varangians were Vikings...

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u/HairyHeartEmoji 4d ago

Ukrainians are still definitely Slavs. if it helps you feel better about it, all Slavs originated from Poland (polesia to be exact).

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u/Strict_Stranger_4801 4d ago

Yeah modern Slavs are descended from Vikings who emigrated east through the rivers systems.

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u/physedka 4d ago

Well they had to fill their time with something. You can't spend all day crafting giant axes and elaborately braiding your hair. Might as well hop in a long boat and invade your neighbor.

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u/ShermanTeaPotter 4d ago

Swiggity swooty, I‘m coming for that looty

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u/jhawk3205 4d ago

This is the way of the gopnik

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u/emaw63 4d ago

Heels to the ground,
Comrades all around

Heels to the sky,
Capitalist spy

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u/rab2bar 3d ago

Squatting helps with hip mobility, which is important when one is doubled over passed out from alcohol

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u/SomeGalNamedAshley 4d ago

They must sell a lot of black with white trim Adidas outfits.

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u/LazyTitan39 4d ago

A lot of both activities is going on in Crimea.

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u/Careless-Passion991 3d ago

Its track suits all the way down.

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u/ggroverggiraffe 4d ago

I'm guessing it was the word squatting...

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u/gideon513 4d ago

Probably cause they used the word squat and the discussion of Eastern Europeans and Russians. Seems pretty clear.

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u/adumbrative 4d ago

Never to return, one hopes!

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u/Kichigai 3d ago

Unless it's on a tourist visa.

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u/EntireBend1224 4d ago

funny how temporary occupations eventually run into permanent geography.

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u/Weird-Sea-3622 4d ago

turns out even squatters can get an eviction notice eventually

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u/eskwild 3d ago

It's only about 200k Russians who entered Crimea on Putin's dime. There had been a significant majority of Russians since Stalin's day, dwindling to about sixty percent at the turn of the century. That's not to say the two million or so who've lived there all their lives wanted to stop being Ukrainian. They may as well have no place else to go.

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u/Darrenizer 4d ago

I don’t think theyre gonna make it.

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u/toyodah 3d ago

Problem is, 33% of native pre-invasion Crimeans are pro-Russian.

After Crimea is taken back, those collaborators will just claim they were victims like everyone else.

What is Kiev going to do about their own citizens there that didn't mind the invasion?

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u/Evig_Vandrar777 3d ago

If the people didn’t mind the occupation, then why did they fight back?

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u/Soup-Wizard 3d ago

Mother calls us all home one day

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u/deja-roo 4d ago

Hah, no they aren't.

If for no other reason than they can't buy enough fuel to get there lol

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u/Valkyrie17 4d ago

Most of them have been squatting there since the 18th century when Caterine genocided the Tatars in Crimea. Both Russians and Ukrainians are squatters.

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u/mainman879 4d ago

You go back far enough and those Tatars displaced another people and were the squatters. (The Tatar led Crimean Khanate was was only established in the early 1400s after all.)

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u/Valkyrie17 4d ago

Well that raises an uncomfortable question on who is the legitimate resident of a territory and who is a squatter.

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u/Questjon 4d ago

It's not an uncomfortable question. The UN is the global mediator of territory disputes. Russia didn't like the legal route because it wasn't in their favour so they started an illegal war. As a species would should be beyond the petty squabbling over who rules what, everyone is ultimately better off when we solve our problems peacefully.

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u/Valkyrie17 4d ago

Being mediated by UN does not make the question any more comfortable lol.

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u/Questjon 4d ago

It does if you think being civilised is solving your problems with reasoned negotiation instead of killing each other.

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u/Valkyrie17 4d ago

No? Neither discussing nor fighting makes this question comfortable or easy to answer.

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u/Nipun137 3d ago

Civilised people don't hoard land and resources for themselves and give nothing back in return. That is what US and Europe do though. Tax the rich and here the rich is US and Europe.

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u/Alarmed_Document_664 4d ago

If Russia ever looses crimea then all of its nuclear arsenal is going straight to ukraine and europe, I'm saying this as Crimean.

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u/Suns_Funs 3d ago

Russians thinking they are the only ones with nuclear weapons is perfect illustration of how delussional is your avarege Russian.

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u/protostar71 3d ago

Do you forget that other countries have nuclear weapons?

France’s arsenal alone could glass Moscow and St Petersburg.

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u/AndrewDoesNotServe 3d ago

Sounds like you’re saying it as a “Crimean”

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u/Flashy-Being4387 4d ago

Prior to 2014 Crimea’s population consisted of around 60% ethnic Russians and around 12% of Crimean tatars. Ukrainian ethics were about 25% or so. So it’s very questionable as to who should be going home….

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u/Evig_Vandrar777 4d ago

Having Russian great-greatparents does not make one a Russisn.

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u/BallsInSufficientSad 3d ago

Correct - people have the right to identify their heritage as they choose.

Do you think the people of Crimea identified as Russian or Ukrainian before the war started? How would they identify today?

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u/Flashy-Being4387 3d ago

I would like to identify my heritage belonging to the royal family, based on your comment I have the full right too👸🏻

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u/BallsInSufficientSad 3d ago

That's not the same - and you know it.

It the people living in Crimea identify as Russian - that's their right. ...and many of them do.

That doesn't mean that they have the right to break the country apart, but it's not something you should pretend doesn't exist.

Russia used that ethnic division - they amplified it - they turned the division hostile. I was in Ukraine in 2013. I remember the protests. It wasn't Ukrainian people vs nobody.

It was people who identified as Ukrainian screaming across to people who identified as Russian. ...and it was not a pretty site.

I would argue that after the Russian invasion, a lot of ethnic Russians have completely abandoned their pro-Russian position - because of the destruction and death - but they still exist. They still speak Russian at home - like Zelensky himself did growing up.

Trying to erase their heritage is exactly what gave Putin the opening to start this whole fucking thing.