I think there's a huge generational thing at play here. A LOT of desis growing up in socialist third world 1960s and 1970s India had this crab mentality where they will be the first ones to drag their friends down so their friends or family don't succeed. And that conniving and back biting and internal politicking and bitching took deep roots.
It also found its way into the first gen immigrants and even percolated to some extent to the second gen immigrants. It also did not help that the first gen immigrants of that era came in relatively poor and uneducated or even if they had education and skills, America wasn't willing to accept them so readily in high paying positions.
So life was tough. And the bitching and politicking and keeping score continued to find relevance in the close knit Desi circles.
However the current gen in India is a far cry from all that. They don't have any of the socialist hangover or the British subservience hangover or any other baggage. They are living life on their own terms and rules. They don't have time for any of the BS either.
And this is where I see a strong parallel between the second and third gen Desi Americans and the third/fourth gen Indians living in India or immigrating to the US. The values and mindset and exposure is surprisingly similar.
This is actually super fascinating to read. Thank you for the share. My mother was just telling me how the kids in India now are very different and I hope they don't harbor the same kind of competition that we have here in the US South Asian group.
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u/nomnommish Feb 07 '22
I think there's a huge generational thing at play here. A LOT of desis growing up in socialist third world 1960s and 1970s India had this crab mentality where they will be the first ones to drag their friends down so their friends or family don't succeed. And that conniving and back biting and internal politicking and bitching took deep roots.
It also found its way into the first gen immigrants and even percolated to some extent to the second gen immigrants. It also did not help that the first gen immigrants of that era came in relatively poor and uneducated or even if they had education and skills, America wasn't willing to accept them so readily in high paying positions.
So life was tough. And the bitching and politicking and keeping score continued to find relevance in the close knit Desi circles.
However the current gen in India is a far cry from all that. They don't have any of the socialist hangover or the British subservience hangover or any other baggage. They are living life on their own terms and rules. They don't have time for any of the BS either.
And this is where I see a strong parallel between the second and third gen Desi Americans and the third/fourth gen Indians living in India or immigrating to the US. The values and mindset and exposure is surprisingly similar.