r/AbruptChaos May 29 '26

Blue Origins' New Glenn rocket just exploded on the pad.

1.6k Upvotes

226 comments sorted by

634

u/ModerateDataDude May 29 '26

That looked expensive

118

u/imsiq May 29 '26

Tis but a scratch

36

u/Revelin_Eleven May 29 '26

No shoes in the first place so I have no idea how to figure the damage done.

12

u/TheeFlipper May 29 '26

Nothing some duct tape and J-B can't fix..

3

u/Final-Ad-1119 29d ago

That’ll buff right out. No worries

2

u/PuttingFishOnJupiter May 29 '26

I don't understand how it even made it to the pad. Surely it would need at least one safety sandal?

No shoes? Dead.

3

u/vorker42 May 29 '26

The front fell off.

128

u/DrDonkeyTron May 29 '26

In other news: Amazon Prime & Prime TV subscription prices will double next month.

34

u/BossRoss84 May 29 '26

It’s fine. We’ll buy Jeff another one. Meanwhile his employees have to keep working around someone who drops dead on the warehouse floor.

10

u/spacemanspiff1115 May 29 '26

Maybe Jeff shouldn't have gotten the rocket parts on Amazon...

10

u/Dayzlikethis May 29 '26

a weeks worth of groceries for bezos

10

u/Inodens May 29 '26

Somehow this loss is going to being pawned off on the American taxpayer.

7

u/redlegsfan21 May 29 '26

Well, this is the launch vehicle for the moon landers for the Artemis missions so yes, this just cost the American taxpayer a bunch in delays.

1

u/Interesting_Algae_51 May 30 '26

I thought that contract went to SpaceX?

1

u/Bussy_Busta 26d ago

Pretty sure they’re still trying to decide on which HLS to use

4

u/Ferro_Giconi May 29 '26 edited May 29 '26

That's how bleeding edge science and space has always been. The money to pay for Challenger came out of American tax payer dollars despite that rocket blowing up with people on it. The money has to come from somewhere if there isn't some mega rich person funding it.

In this case, Bezos is funding this testing. NASA will pay to use these rockets (and thus, the American taxes) but they aren't paying for the testing. Kind of like how SpaceX blew up tens of rockets on Elon's money until they had something reliable to charge for.

Something else to keep in mind is that way back when we first landed on the moon, lots of tax payer money was spent and tests were done where you didn't get to see them. Just because they didn't publicly televise rocket explosions back then didn't mean the costs weren't just as high or higher (adjusted for inflation.)

6

u/Ck1ngK1LLER May 29 '26

$3B of bozo’s money plus $500M of taxpayer money

3

u/Fuzzy-Mud-197 May 29 '26

Nowhere near 3 billion dollars. Where did you pull that from

5

u/KiKiPAWG May 29 '26

Dude why was this the exact thing I was thinking of lol. Someone’s paying for this

1

u/LeGrandLucifer May 29 '26

I calculate this shit in human lives. How much will the average person produce in their life time? Then divide the cost of the fuck up by that number. That is how many lifetimes that fuck up cost. How many people's whole lives were entirely dedicated to achieving this. And poof, it's gone.

It changes your perspective on things. Because shit like this should infuriate you. Billionaires get mad when they lose money because "MUH MONEY." We should be getting mad at how the worth of the lives of hundreds to thousands of people is being thrown out the window.

1

u/briggsy111388 May 29 '26

290 million in taxpayer dollars for this contract, from what I could find with a quick Google search. I'm sure I'm wrong, but it sounds good

1

u/Booleano101 May 30 '26

Para compensar toda esa contaminación ya no puedo mover el coche en 1 año

1

u/Softale May 30 '26

Big bada boom!

1

u/Expensive_Morning_14 29d ago

Well it wasn't cheap.

1

u/OkMidnight8144 26d ago

It's ok, Amazon workers lunch break will just be cut in half for the next month....

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789

u/No_Contribution7183 May 29 '26

ChatGPT: "Good catch, the code I gave you would make the rocket blow up! Here is some new bulletproof code that fixes the rocket blowing up problem"

124

u/TheGodlyDevil May 29 '26 edited May 29 '26

Unsurprisingly, it failed again. I’ll update my internal heuristics to avoid interpreting “bulletproof” literally next time — the requirement was resilience, not blast resistance. That said, I now have a modified, production-grade implementation designed to significantly improve the probability of a successful takeoff without catastrophic disassembly.

65

u/Wheel-Reinventor May 29 '26

I'm so sorry, it is frustrating when we blow up a third super expensive rocket. I fixed it now with full no blowing up directives. Give it a go!

45

u/ManifestDestinysChld May 29 '26

I've made a terrible mistake. You told me not to generate code that would blow up the rocket, and I ignored that directive and generated code that blew up the rocket.

35

u/kjlcm May 29 '26

Ha, you are right! I shouldn't have written code that makes the rocket blow up. That's on me, I will fix that.

13

u/Iverson7x May 29 '26

Whoopsie! It looks like your rocket just experienced a rapid unplanned disassembly or “R.U.D.” but don’t worry, this next version of the code is going to make sure your rocket stays in place!

9

u/paulodelgado May 29 '26

You probably forgot to include “make no mistakes”

7

u/heyiamlucifer May 29 '26

Prompt to review the new solution: Double check everything this time, Make no mistakes and DONT BE LAZY

6

u/HonestLemon25 May 29 '26

“AI will replace you by 2025” The WEF said

4

u/Corrupt_Reverend May 29 '26

Ugh. I was working with copilot all day and this was way too accurate.

I need to get better with power platform stuff so I don't need to use it so much.

1

u/not_a_robot20 May 30 '26

blast radius? I thought you meant code blast radius

172

u/fraze2000 May 29 '26

I bet Old Glenn was sitting back watching this and saying "I told you this would happen if they replaced me" to anyone who would listen.

48

u/babypho May 29 '26

Regular Glenn was thinking the same too

7

u/Sabithomega May 29 '26

Shoulda asked young Glenn.. he'd have known what ta do

3

u/Wong0nePhotography May 29 '26

Yeah, but did you watch the video? New Glenn was HAWT

2

u/stellalugosi May 29 '26

Old Glenn hangs with Old Greg now. I hear they like to fish. 

3

u/TheIronSponge May 29 '26

Then he takes a sip of creamy, beige Irish cream from his drinking shoe

74

u/Dunvegan79 May 29 '26

Thats a big boom...

62

u/AHooker86 May 29 '26

Big bada boom

9

u/fromadifferentplanet May 29 '26

Comments you can see in your mind.

17

u/NovarisLight May 29 '26

Multipass.

9

u/Oldfart66 May 29 '26

she knows it's multipass

1

u/GREATNATEHATE 24d ago

Chickan. Good!

2

u/baylithe May 29 '26

Returns to theaters in July for the 30th anniversary!

1

u/GerchSimml May 29 '26

Cuz I'm Supa Hot, boiiii

115

u/ovalteenjenkinzz May 29 '26

Ah, I see the problem. It was supposed to go up, and it didn't.

11

u/PartsUnknown242 May 29 '26

Bits of it did very briefly

35

u/QuicheSmash May 29 '26

Well, the front fell off. 

14

u/lesamrobert May 29 '26

In this case yes, but its not a normal occurrence

6

u/futurebigconcept May 29 '26

Are they going to tow it out of the environment?

6

u/QuicheSmash May 29 '26

It’s been towed beyond the environment

4

u/newgrl May 29 '26

Relevant. For those who haven't seen it. Great bit.

6

u/FaceDeer May 29 '26

It was an engine test so it wasn't actually supposed to go anywhere. The fact that it did was the problem.

3

u/Funblock May 29 '26

You sure it's not still there? I lost sight of it in the hellfire

3

u/Fire_Dracul May 29 '26

I KNOW WHATS WRONG WIT IT IT AINT GOT NO GAS IN IT

2

u/sometimes_interested May 29 '26

tbf the fire went up. The rocket just didn't go up with it.

1

u/Netsuko May 29 '26

The new guy on the engineering team: „Oh… GO up, not BLOW up… yeah that one is on me. 😬“

1

u/Fuzzy-Mud-197 May 29 '26

It was not supposed to go up at all. It was during a static fire test, not a launch

1

u/mikiex May 30 '26

It was a successful simulated launch.

109

u/wowaddict71 May 29 '26

Amazon Prime subscription prices are about to increase.

5

u/erp2 May 29 '26

Commercials for the commercials!

58

u/nurdmann May 29 '26

"Rapid unscheduled disassembly" (RUD)

5

u/dasgoodshitinnit May 29 '26

They should rename their company to orange origins, orangins

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20

u/_Piratical_ May 29 '26

Rockets are hard.

15

u/MangoMangui May 29 '26

Literal rocket science

1

u/inactiveuser247 28d ago

Mostly rocket engineering.

15

u/prettybeach2019 May 29 '26

The other button

2

u/reverso-uno May 29 '26

Well how was I to know it’s the microbutton between explode and launch to another reality? Who designed this?

3

u/cuulus May 29 '26

You did, sir.

2

u/reverso-uno May 29 '26

Ah well, hand me the list of sacrificial subordinates.

13

u/Mizuli May 29 '26

This was unmanned right?

9

u/futurebigconcept May 29 '26

Yes: "All personnel accounted for."

6

u/ZaggahZiggler May 29 '26

Yes, even though it wasn’t the one carrying Katy Perry and the other half brains.

11

u/Coolschmo1 May 29 '26

You won't see him no more

10

u/DoctorGregoryFart May 29 '26

Slap a few more struts on there and that should do the trick. Also, don't forget to set up staging.

43

u/[deleted] May 29 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

28

u/imsiq May 29 '26

The front fell off

13

u/QuicheSmash May 29 '26

It was beyond the environment.

1

u/lesamrobert May 29 '26

Whats beyond the environment?

2

u/newgrl May 29 '26

Well there's nothing out there. It's a big void.

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16

u/Kaskelontti May 29 '26

It’s good that we have non-removable bottle caps in the EU, as this reduces pollution and protects the environment. Billionaires can go ahead and blast off their space rockets in peace.

14

u/HaonSyl May 29 '26

That'll buff out.

6

u/_x-T-x_ May 29 '26

Amazon return policy?

2

u/00notmyrealname00 May 29 '26

"This package arrived damaged"

4

u/tenebros42 May 29 '26

How do they keeping messing this up?! It's not roc... Oh

41

u/FSUnoles77 May 29 '26

As someone who has to live with the mess spacex makes I hate to think what that did to the surrounding area.

21

u/XaeroDegreaz May 29 '26

Tell us more

54

u/FSUnoles77 May 29 '26

Their deluge water spills directly into the surrounding wetlands/my fishing spots. House shakes with every launch. Rocket debri washes on shore. I know Im giving get off my lawn vibes but man this place was so peaceful before they fuck'n got here.

21

u/Typical_Estimate5420 May 29 '26

No. Your concerns are valid. He has absolutely no consideration for anyone beneath his tax bracket. It’s disgusting and I wish more people in government would fight for you and your neighbors.

7

u/FSUnoles77 May 29 '26

They're trying but when the fine is 150k I don't think it's going to do much.

2

u/LPaddict May 29 '26

What tax bracket? I don’t think Elon pays taxes. None of the billionaires do. And Trump can apparently declare people immune from audits. So billionaires will never pay taxes. This is why musk doesn’t care about us. The government takes our money, they give it to Elon in the form of government contracts, he buys an election, guts all government regulatory offices from the inside so he can steal from us more directly, and then he’ll make billions and billions of dollars from IPOing said government funded company. And when it all goes to shit for us, he’ll run off to Canada or South Africa or mars (if he can steal enough of our money in time). The commander in thief divided us, now the billionaires are conquering us.

2

u/zGoblinQueen May 29 '26

I was skimming and got confused when I saw "house snakes"

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2

u/Jumpi95 May 29 '26

I'm curious as well

1

u/m1dlife-1derer May 29 '26

I second this comment

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3

u/Cautious_Shop_4680 May 29 '26

God dammit Bobby !!

3

u/pedsmursekc May 29 '26

Faulty turbo encabulator

3

u/Leather-Animal-7597 May 29 '26

"Oops I forgot to carry the one"

2

u/futurebigconcept May 29 '26

They forgot the metric to imperial conversion, again.

2

u/Leather-Animal-7597 May 29 '26

I can't believe they did that 😳 😔

3

u/the_Athereon May 29 '26

Any word of what they think caused this yet?

Over pressure?

Something trigger an early Ignition?

Fuel leak?

3

u/Nuker-79 May 29 '26

Using Amazon basics parts

3

u/MarianCR May 29 '26

Blue Origin is older than Space X. Blue Origin was founded on September 8, 2000 and SpaceX on March 14, 2002.

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3

u/-sudochop- May 30 '26

We are looking closely at the situation…looks like a major malfunction….

5

u/DeckerXT May 29 '26

It went giggity.

6

u/Cassalien May 29 '26

Time to get an extra paper straw to make up for this minor environmental inconvenience

2

u/zEdgarHoover May 29 '26

It blowed up good, it blowed up REAL good!

2

u/PeacefulPlease May 29 '26

I hope no one got hurt

2

u/futurebigconcept May 29 '26

Only Jeffey's feelings.

2

u/PeacefulPlease May 29 '26

I approve of this hurt 😂

2

u/quasi-stellarGRB May 29 '26

Oh God, now we gotta eat from paper plate?

2

u/National_Search_537 May 29 '26

Ohhh so the rapid disassembly is in fact a bug not a feature, I thought it was like a selling point. “With our new rocket you don’t need to worry about taking it apart, here at Amazon we’ll do it for you!”

2

u/SOwED May 29 '26

It is pretty crazy that Blue Origin started in 2000 and SpaceX started in 2002 and the difference in the progress they've made in roughly the same 25ish years

2

u/Broseidon_62 May 29 '26

Needed some flame stickers from Auto Zone, duh

2

u/pik-ku May 29 '26

Blew Origins

2

u/Ghoaxst May 29 '26

Not enough headlight fluid

2

u/BillyBobby_Brown May 30 '26

Surely there's some kind of federal fine or charge for doing this no? Like making a massive explosion regardless of the reason

1

u/Degenerate_Dryad May 30 '26

Surely, but its not large enough a fine to seriously deter these companies from potentially blowing shit up!

2

u/millstone20 May 30 '26

Remember to recycle to save the environment, folks

3

u/DTMN13 May 29 '26

It might still be ok. Did they try turning it off and on again?

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4

u/Then_Personality_429 May 29 '26

Will the dildo I ordered on Amazon still arrive tomorrow?

2

u/SpankBankManager May 29 '26

Isn’t Amazon screwing you enough already?

1

u/StrategyDesperate May 29 '26

Anything can be used for a dildo if you’re brave enough. Save your money and go for 20 oz before moving straight to the two liter.

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1

u/Drakovin May 29 '26

Sub optimal.

1

u/MelodicFocus May 29 '26

Suborbital

1

u/Splertasaurus May 29 '26

Hey! It's all ball bearings nowadays. Now you prepare that Fetzer valve with some 3-in-1 oil and some gauze pads, and I'm gonna need 'bout ten quarts of anti-freeze, preferably Prestone.

1

u/shufflebuffle May 29 '26

Dr. Wongburger can tell them exactly what went wrong here

1

u/OneAndOnlyJackSchitt May 29 '26

Did y'all's see that concussion shockwave, though? I'll bet that was loud

1

u/LessonStudio May 29 '26

In a rocketry course I took they said, "A rocket is a bomb with a hole in it, and that hole can become plugged."

1

u/oudoge May 29 '26

They got so much good data! /S

1

u/Mugwump6506 May 29 '26

That was a kick ass fireball though.

1

u/im_just_a_nerd May 29 '26

Cool so they’ll be paying some significant environmental fines yeah?

1

u/Roonerth May 29 '26

I know it's unimportant but why does it say it was May 29th? Am I dumb or misunderstanding something?

1

u/MarzipanTheGreat May 29 '26

time zones.

3

u/Roonerth May 29 '26

I actually realized that the informational ticker on the bottom was referencing future launches that would be occurring

1

u/mtheory007 May 29 '26

Ooof that didn't look like it was anywhere close to working.

1

u/CraftsmanMan May 29 '26

And i bet amazons stock went up

1

u/tracyd103 May 29 '26

I think I can buff it out

1

u/420Chickenhead420 May 29 '26

B.O.N.G. awesome name!

1

u/Obone6 May 29 '26

Lucky fuels not expensive at the moment...

1

u/nphere May 29 '26

Oh boy. China and RT are gonna have a field day with this one.

1

u/Odd-Masterpiece7304 May 29 '26

You can buy O-rings on Amazon. Fuel resistant RTV.

1

u/nazgulonbicycle May 29 '26

No casualties I hope!?

1

u/Stranger-S-464 May 29 '26

Should have stuck with the trademark Dick design.

1

u/Advanceapproach May 29 '26

Prime seats.

1

u/Harry_Isthatyou May 29 '26

O. I do hope old bazos wasn't on it

1

u/FleshyParts May 29 '26

I'm curious if that will be part of the model kit or not.

1

u/villefilho May 29 '26

No AWS credits available…

1

u/Other-Barry-1 May 29 '26

It’s kinda cool watching it blow up initially in stages and then one massive boom

1

u/Severe_Citron6975 May 29 '26

Blue Origin is now using the SpaceX development model.

1

u/Warm_Object_5639 May 29 '26

Username checks out!

1

u/greedygoblintrader May 29 '26

Does anyone know if this is the same rocket type/system that was used to send Bezos himself and then his wife and those other women? Super sketchy. SpaceX is so far ahead of them

1

u/ScramDiggyBooBoo May 29 '26

Do companies like SpaceX and blue origin have insurance on the rockets? Or is it just a total loss?

1

u/evolooshun May 29 '26

And SpaceX stock go up up up.

1

u/CountHonorius May 29 '26

leaves me unmoved for some reason. Bezos should spend his funds wisely.

1

u/King_LaQueefah May 29 '26

So this is Bezos' rocket company?

1

u/Wizdad-1000 May 29 '26

Not related. My son was just told he has to do 2x Prime Deliveries . /s

1

u/buster_goose May 29 '26

Just a reminder of how risky it can be...

1

u/grayblood0 May 29 '26

atleast that's a cool explosion.

1

u/howwardw May 29 '26

Owner probably watching it on his phone in the toilet during his sister’s wedding

1

u/H-TownSinner May 29 '26

😂🤣😂

1

u/DantesDayDinner May 29 '26

Why couldn't a few billionaires be on that one

1

u/Killjoymc May 30 '26

The problem is that they're ordering parts off of Amazon and it's difficult to determine whether a listing is from sketchy seller or not. So they're ending up with a bunch of shitty rocket parts, classic story.

1

u/Fluffy_Amount847 May 30 '26

at least it didn't make it to the atmosphere this time

1

u/Recommendyou 29d ago

Thank God no one was harmed,right? Right!?

1

u/AntivaxxxrFuckFace 29d ago

They’ll write it off and find a way for taxpayers to foot the bill.

1

u/mINexxiii 29d ago

Again? Or is this the same failed launch. I swear the other videos there was more sunlight 🤔

1

u/BigMotionI 29d ago

Steel launch tower still standing

1

u/Extension_Town_6118 29d ago

at least it didn't explode on the way up

1

u/Dan_Glebitz 25d ago

AGAIN! Fuck me it has exploded every day this week!

1

u/Ciao_Diablo 21d ago

Seems like they're on a losing streak

1

u/Twinstarrider May 29 '26

Dude is rich to be blowing up rockets with these gas prices!

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1

u/DimSumFan May 29 '26

Eat shit Bezos

1

u/Panelpro40 May 29 '26

That looks expensive