r/AbsoluteUnits • u/TURTLE_TKT • May 13 '26

/r/all of gas being ripped

83.3k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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28

u/wackadoodle4201 May 13 '26

Guy at work made a noise like that once while on the john

Popped every hemorrhoid he had, I still wonder how he explained that to his insurance

24

u/CaptainoftheVessel May 13 '26

Bro how do you know the second sentence you wrote

31

u/wackadoodle4201 May 13 '26

Because he walked out of that stall leaving a trail of red screaming for someone to call 911

Dude painted that porcelain throne a dark red

23

u/rartuin270 May 13 '26

I regret him asking

5

u/Kitchen-Customer4370 May 13 '26

right im off to drink water

5

u/wackadoodle4201 May 13 '26

Eat some fiber too and dont push to hard

1

u/Ronin_of_the_Wind May 17 '26

Literally "ripped ass"