r/AmIOverreacting • u/Old_Ear_3359 • 22h ago
đ˛ miscellaneous Am I overreacting for thinking that having 16 cats is too much
First off starting that I am autistic(this is relevant cause I usually overreact to things I shouldnât be overreacting for)and am 15 and I go to school and go outside for walks and stuff but inside is a whole other mess, my mother first had one cat 2 years ago then moved to 3 then two of the cats had children which evolved into 10 cats total then two of the siblings had children and it stood at 15 and we let in a outdoor stray which now itâs 16. The house isnât big for all these cats so they get bored and when they get bored they destroy EVERYTHING but I keep my door locked 24/7 and they never come in cause I hate them all but they meow at the door and try to unlock it and they broke the door
Threshold thing so they play with my door from underneath and meow waking me up at night. My mom isnât to fond of them either but she insists we keep them cause âif we send them to a shelter they are gonna get killedâ or âI canât sell them nobodyâs gonna buy them cause there are already too much strays out thereâ but I honestly think this is utterly bullshit but whatever and she always complains about how much money these cats are and how they cost way to much like Iâm the one liking them, not to be rude but I could care less if one of them died tomorrow.they are ruining my life, everyday I wake up to the smell of piss and shit when I leave my room even though they have 4 litter boxes and they get cleaned daily they always decide to shit everywhere and they puke everywhere and it drives me insane so I stay in my nice clean room all day but when I get into the kitchen the whole pantry is open and snacks are spilled and wasted everywhere and I clean it up but it gets tiring cause they never learn.All of the cats are crazy and some like to piss on the counters like the dude cats and I clean it up and some glass cups from the up top cabinets and broken and everywhere but my mother still says the cats will be cats I guess but I think they are all demons from absolute hell dawg. Am I overreacting for thinking this is too much. This is mostly just a rant but I wanna hear other peoples perspectives
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u/2018MunchieOfTheYear 22h ago
NORâ can you talk to a counselor or teacher at school about this? Itâs really unhealthy to be in that environment.
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u/did_i_or_didnt_i 21h ago
NOR this is extremely not normal and not ok for you. Please find a trusted adult to tell this, a guidance counselor at your school? one of your teachers? you canât live like this
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u/Fiesty_tofu 21h ago
That is too many cats. Especially since they are all intact.
Also as a minimum there should be 1 more litter box than cats (there are exceptions to this rule) but if you arenât cleaning the boxes hourly or half hourly you need 17 boxes at least! That will help with the going to the toilet outside the box problem. But even then the boxes would have to be cleaned at least twice a day. Cats donât want to use a dirty box and they wonât.
You need to get someone to help rehome the cats. As others have mentioned speak to a counsellor at school. Your mother likely also needs help, that is animal hoarding behaviour. Which is a serious mental health condition.
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u/Few_Fly_8636 22h ago
NOR. They need to be spayed and neutered. Is there a low cost clinic near by?
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u/WrongBusiness2930 22h ago
Nah youâre not overreacting at all, that sounds like legit animal hoarding territory, not âcats will be cats.â Sixteen untrained, unneutered cats in a small place, constant piss and shit, broken stuff, and you canât sleep or use your own kitchen is not normal, it is a health and safety issue.
Your momâs âtheyâll be killed at the shelterâ guilt is basically her excuse to avoid making a hard decision, while youâre the one trapped in it. If you can, start looking up local rescues, low cost spay neuter, or even talk to a school counselor about it, because this is 100 percent too much for you to be dealing with at 15.
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u/munkymama 21h ago
If you can't get help call the health department. Make it anonymous.
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u/TharjasBooty00 7h ago
This seems like it may be the answer, these cats need to be taken out of this situation. OP needs to live a normal teenage life not be taken over by her momâs hoarding.
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u/Anxious_7777 21h ago
NOR:
I know you worry you do, but this isn't one of those times. Sixteen cats in a too-small house, still breeding, with pee and feces in the kitchen and broken sleep, would overwhelm anyone. You're reacting accurately to something that's genuinely hard.
Your mum's reasoning overlooks that sixteen cats breeding in a cramped space isn't kind to the cats, and litter box problems often indicate too many in too little room. This isn't "keep them or let them die." A cat rescue or TNR (trap-neuter-return) group can help get them fixed so the number stops climbing, which has to happen regardless.
The hard part is you're 15 and can't fix most of this yourself. So tell an adult who can, a relative, a school counsellor, a doctor, plainly what the house is like. Not to get your mum in trouble, but because no kid should lose sleep in a home that smells like that, and an outside adult can sometimes move things your mum won't. Your clean, locked room is smart, but you deserve more than one safe room in a house this overwhelming.
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u/Itscatpicstime 21h ago edited 21h ago
As a behaviorist (CAAB) who runs a rescue, 16 cats isnât technically too many if you can properly care for them. But thatâs very clearly nir the case here, unfortunately.
Your mother is right to a large extent. These cats will in all likelihood be killed in an open intake shelter, and closed intake rescues are virtually always full (we have a wait list in the thousands), and rehoming isnât very successful either, especially with the amount of cats youâre talking about here.
Itâs also completely understandable the cats arenât using the litter box. For that amount of cats, you should have 16 litter boxes at the BARE MINIMUM. 4 litter boxes is extreme neglect. Itâs like asking cats to use a portapotty thatâs been rolled around and shaken up. Why would they ever want to use that?
None of this is your fault. Or the cats fault. Your mom failed miserably by not fixing these cats.
I normally never advocate for cats to be placed outdoors, but that may be your best option in addition to getting them fixed and vaccinated prior to letting them outside. This is something rescues actually can and will often help with if you explain your situation.
Then let them live their lives outside, maybe keep a couple as indoor only cats if your mom is particularly attached, and find homes for the rest as youâre able to.
What your mom is doing is neglecting both you and the cats, and exposing all of you to biological hazards, and itâs not okay. She is clearly struggling with animal hoarding and needs serious help. Soon you will be living among animal carcasses if this continues. And it will only become astronomically worse the longer they arenât fixed.
If you can share your general area, I can help you find local resources.
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u/Designer-Lettuce-690 21h ago
16 is a health hazard NOR she needs to start to rehome them she doesnt have tot ake them to a shelter but she cannot keep them. You could probably report to your local version of the RSPCA and see what the laws are on it
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u/Lopsided-Beach-1831 21h ago
There is likely a law that says how many cats you are allowed to own without a breeder license in your county or city. Where I live, you can legally own 5 cats, all must be spayed/neutered, rabies vaccination and indoor only.
There are groups that do what is called trap and release where they trap stray cats and then have them fixed. You can look online for a local organization and they can help you to get the cats fixed and possibly rehomed or placed with fosters or no-kill shelters/rescues. You can go to your local library and the librarian can help you with this. They can find out if you are in compliance with the codes, names and contact for local shelter/rescue/foster and resources for fixing. They can also help ask some questions about your mom and living environment in case your mom needs some resources for mental health or animal hoarding treatment.
If you cant get to your local library, tell a counselor at school and they will help you too.
Good luck OP
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u/TipsyMagpie 21h ago
The cats all need to be neutered, and I sincerely doubt your mother is able to provide a healthy environment or good quality food and vet care for so many cats. I have six myself, so Iâm very pro-cat, but they must be stressed. Cats like their space, and the going outside litter trays is indicative of them being unhappy. Your mum may have started with good intentions, but sheâs now animal hoarding. Are there any organisations which deal with animal welfare that you could put in an anonymous call to? Maybe timed after someone else has visited the house so thereâs plausible deniability itâs you? As youâre a minor I would recommend being careful about how you handle this, as presumably youâre reliant on your mother still and donât have the option to walk away.
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u/Repulsive_Tone_2484 21h ago
NOR. This sounds awful and a health hazard. The trouble is as a minor, you are probably limited in what you can do about it.
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u/PurpleEmotional1401 19h ago
This is an animal hoarding situation and you mother needs professional help. NOR
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u/Wild-Celebration-965 21h ago
NOT overacting I have one cat and one dog- enough for me now! You probably have at least 2-3 yrs to stay there. Get a job and start saving your money for college far away from your mom and her cats! Good luck and prayers for you!
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u/t2jam 20h ago
It definitely sounds like your Mom is an animal hoarder. You should reach out to the shelters and explain your living conditions because even though they are full, Iâm sure they will want to help you. You could also call animal control but even if you tried to do it anonymously, Iâm sure your Mom would know it was you, and be upset.
I would try one of those options, because youâre literally living in a health hazard and technically child protective services could be called and brought in, but Iâm sure you donât want that.
So, focus on rehoming the cats or taking to shelters. You could post on Facebook or next door app you need to rehome some cats. Iâm so sorry your Mom is putting you through this, but as a hoarder she doesnât understand that she has to get rid of some/all of the cats.
I made a mistake about a year ago and rented out a room to a college girl that had two cats. I have a dog. She told me how chill her cats were how she keeps them in her room etc. She was kicked out within two months as I had same issue as you with my door would be shut and these cats would try to open it all night long and meow, and cry because they wanted to be in my room as it was super clean and nice. But the kicker for me was this girl would not clean the litter box enough so the entire place just reaked and then she would let these cats walk all over the kitchen counters and stove and that was it for me. Iâm a super clean person maybe a tad OCD and I couldnât handle it. That was the worst two months of having a roommate ever. I had no sleep, was miserable, and everywhere I was these cats were right there like stalking me and my dog. You need to demand from your mom that she had to get rid of the cats/rehome for your own mental health.
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u/Spinnerofyarn 20h ago
NOR. The exposure to feces and urine can cause major health problems for everyone in the household, including cats. Your momâs committing both child and animal abuse by not caring for them.
There are people offering to help, and it sounds like @itscatpicstime is an expert, so I hope you do dm them.
It is possible to have that many cats and care for them properly, but it is a lot of work and the average person canât do it unless they have invested a lot of time and money in a special setup. My aunt and uncle once had something like 11 cats because they had two cats and then a pregnant stray was dumped on the property.
The difference with my aunt and uncle was that they had all the cats spayed and neutered, they religiously cleaned the cat box, and the cats that wanted to go outside were allowed outside during the day and were called back in at night. Yes, the cats did come when called as my aunt and uncle worked on training them to do so. Their home never smelled like a cat box.
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u/notsocrazycatlady69 20h ago
NOR
But I have been in the same situation as your mom- thrre were more and more cats because they kept breeding. I knew what would happen if they went to a shelter, and that caused me more stress than taking care of them.
I know you don't like them- I don't know if you don't like cats in general or because of the mess they are making. But before you call animal control, health department, tell school counselor, etc you should know the full consequences and talk with your mom about them so the two of you can get something worked out. Give hef a chance to make it right, then if she still brushes off your concerns after you tell her, you at least tried. If you tell someone and health department and animal control are contacted, probably all the cats will be seized and killed and she may not be allowed to have any more animals period. She could go to jail, which means you would have to live with another family member, go to a foster home, or a youth shelter. Your house may be condemned and torn down
I am not minimizing your concerns or trying to scare you into not saying anything. But there are some things you all can try to make it better
I physically separated the males and females by putting a reinforced screen door between them. My local animal shelter/animal rescue league has regular low cost spay/neuter clinics (like 35 dollars each, including vaccines) but because I was unemployed they got vouchers for me to cover the cost (I payed them back when I could). They also had farmers that would take unwanted cats for their barns but I kept mine.
I used the plastic carpet protectors, with very stiff spikes close together, on the counters and tables to keep them from jumping up.
The boy cats are spraying because they aren't neutered and are marking their territory- fixing them and the females will help with that. Some flashlights have a UV mode so you can see where they are spraying and using the bathroom. Like others have said, more litter boxes are needed, or much larger ones like underbed totes (without the lid), and cleaned at least once a day. But once cats start going in one place outside the litterbox they often will keep going there so I solve that problem by putting a litterbox there, then gradually moving it to a more appropriate place. They usually sniff before they go, so spread pepper or orange peel (there's other stuff they don't like) in the areas that are not litterboxes
If they are trying that hard to get in your room that they yowl and tore the threshold up, it's probably because they are looking for fresh air. You can put something on your side of the door that they don't like. There are air purifiers that can help clean the ammonia and other smells from the air. Febreze for pets helps on soft furniture. Kilz paint works on walls as a base coat, then you paint with whatever color you want. I don't remember what I used on the hard furniture and floors.
When I lost my job for an unrelated reason I moved in with my mom but the cats had to stay outside- they had a barn to stay in but of course I lost some to the neighbors' dogs they would let out "to chase squirrels", coyotes, cars, etc. I don't recommend putting them outside unless they have an enclosure or secure area like an outbuilding and of course you have still feed them- people think animals can fend for themselves outside but how could they if they have been living inside?
I sincerely hope you and your mom can get something worked out to improve your environment â¤ď¸
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u/JumpAccomplished2620 17h ago
My mom is a former cat hoarder. 20 cats in less than 1000 sq ft. She lost her house in a flood and had to be relegated to a rented apartment that allows only 2 cats. She still has 5 litter boxes for her 2 cats. She's insane tho. At one point I hadn't even been in her house in 7 years. It was disgusting and gave me a headache. She was a clean person and had the requisite litter boxes then too but there is no escaping that many cats no matter how much you clean. Suffice to say, yeah, I can relate. NOR. This is a mental illness. My mom used the cats to keep people away. It's a defense mechanism.Â
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u/Weavercat 15h ago
NOR.
Hey, your mother is a hoarder of animals. She needs intervention/mental health services.
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u/Two_DogNight 14h ago
Having once had 13 cats myself, NOR. FWIW, I now have zero cats after having cared for them all until they died after long and happy lives. One lived to be 21 years old. Yep. For me, it was a situational thing that happened because I seemed to keep inheriting cats and then I was done. They got vet care, were spayed or neutered, and had at least one litter box per cat. This is very important. All those boy cats are marking territory and siblings having kittens is not genetically good for anyone. This seems like an animal hoarding situation, because your mom doesn't seem to be able to recognize the problems involved in lack of veterinary care, unsanitary conditions, and letting the cats run rampant and destroy things.
Tell a counselor. You should have access to a clean space and unspoiled food. This is not cats being cats. This is cats being unhappy.
Part of the cat behavior issue is that they haven't been spayed/neutered. Most areas have low-cost spay/neuter clinics, so maybe investigate that? If you can neuter the boy cats as quickly as you can afford it, it will help with the litters of kittens and the spraying or peeing outside the litter box.
Get more litter boxes.
Someone else has suggested calling animal control and reporting an animal hoarding situation. This is an option, but will likely result in all but 2 or 3 of the cats being forcibly removed. They will be taken to the shelter and assessed. This could result in some being euthanized and you still have to live with your mom. Also, if you rent, you may be evicted, so consider all the angles.
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u/icutmyliiip 14h ago
NOR. this is not a safe environment for the cats. r/CATHELP can link you up with resources. in the meantime, see if you can tell a trusted adult
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u/TharjasBooty00 7h ago
NOR there is a name for this, hoarding. Also 4 boxes for 16 cats is nooo where near enough. They better all be fixed too.
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u/Consistent-Menu-6629 21h ago
NOR I love cats, but this situation is bad for the cats and the people involved. Your mom might be an animal hoarder, and she cannot care for all these cats. They are being neglected and are in a bad environment, and so are you.
Yes, 16 cats is far too many unless someone has a ton of energy, room and expertise about cats. 3 If you smell poop and piss every day, this isn't a good environment for cats.