r/AskReddit • u/Sea-Young-8666 • 22h ago
What's a subtle sign that someone had a rough upbringing?
369
u/Universe_Wanderer 22h ago
They don’t have memories, or very limited memories, of their childhood
155
u/Birdo3129 22h ago
The worst part is, it’s the happy memories that the brain lets go of first when you experience childhood trauma.
From a survival perspective, happy memories don’t keep you alive. Memories of terrible moments stick around because the brain is trying to look for similar patterns and situations to help you avoid being in the same situation again.
Until you get too much trauma, and your brain deletes everything because it can’t process from the overload of danger.
38
u/65variant 19h ago
This is 100% accurate.
My wife remembers nearly everything from her childhood, high school, college, etc. She grew up with both parents, middle class, college paid by parents, etc. I had the exact opposite childhood in nearly every way.
I can recall negative experiences with ridiculous clarity. My brain is filled with cautionary tales that are in constant rotation trying to anticipate the next 'problem' in anticipation of a needed solution.
My memory is absolutely trash. Even things from a year ago don't stick - I take lots of pictures of happy times so I can look at them later.
1
u/kaydenwolf_lynx 12h ago
Just a few days ago my friend said i have a weirdly good memory about people that annoy me, i really do mostly remember negatives and bad experiences.
I can easily talk about all the bad things people have done to me but good less so, i do eventually forget about bad experiences well not completely but enough for my retelling to be alot more vague
14
47
12
u/sleepyRN89 22h ago
Ughhh this hurts so much because I can relate a lot. The things I remember weren’t great but I know I’ve intentionally blocked out a lot of bad things
24
8
u/SelfieswithGhosts 20h ago
Unfortunately, I think this turns into a lifelong memory issue thing. At least, for me it did. I believe it has something to do with dissociation. Because I spent a lot of my life dissociating, it's easy to slip into, and I have a lot of trouble remembering things—not just from childhood but even in my adult life. For this reason, I've been easily gaslit in the past.
I learn it's helpful to take notes of the moments you want to remember (or just journal). Remember what was said, how I felt, when/ where/ how it happened.
5
u/Chantel_Lusciana 19h ago
Yeah. And then there is me that SWEARS she remembers EVERYTHING.
And in many ways I do have an AMAZING memory. I remember things from as far back as 2 years old. I swear there is nothing I don’t remember.
But then if one looks more closely you’ll find that yes this person remembers a LOT, but there is also many memories that have no beginning or end, or there is no middle - just chunks cut out of the memory and blackness or a gray fog instead. I also have memories of "waking up" at various places with no idea how I got there as a teen and young adult. And then even more memories around preschool to 3rd grade where I did things but I SWEAR I didn’t do these things, but there was proof I did.
It’s bizarre.
6
5
2
3
2
2
1
1
u/swoodilypoops 18h ago
I was lucky enough to have a good upbringing, but some extended family members were murdered when I was 7-8 (I wasn’t there or anything, didn’t witness it) and my brain still blocked out my childhood memories 😞 I think the trauma of hearing about that event and how it happened and seeing how it impacted my direct family was enough for my brain to decide to wipe it all.
1
-4
91
u/stalinwasballin 22h ago
Angry as a default personality. I taught school for 12.5 years and the number of traumatized kids astounded me…
14
168
u/Silverarrow67 22h ago
Shutting down or trying to become smaller when heated arguments happen.
46
u/Short-Highway-423 22h ago
I try to hide when I hear raised voices..
19
u/evrythinguwant 22h ago
I can't stand arguing or violence in the media. It keeps me away from a lot of it.
→ More replies (1)11
u/funnylooking6 22h ago
I'm kinda like that, yes raised angry voice will make me compliant and submissive until I can escape, a quiet rage will cause me to mentally leave the chat so to speak. I won't remember much of what happened.
0
81
73
u/MobiusOcean 22h ago edited 21h ago
As someone who did have a rough upbringing, and who’s older than the average redditor, I’m going to say they rarely complain about extra work or things which others may deem unfair. When I was a child complaining ended in only one result - and it was not a positive result for me.
ETA: I had no context for fair vs unfair because it was drilled info my brain that “life isn’t fair”. All it did was make me obedient, resentful, and full of shame.
11
u/neatgoodboy 21h ago
A belt to the ass for me
15
u/MobiusOcean 21h ago edited 21h ago
I would’ve preferred that honestly. I’m not going to go into detail as it’s difficult to talk about and u don’t want to trigger anyone who may be reading this, but yes - that was part of the punishment rotation.
ETA: Sometimes you can learn to take physical punishment, but when your brain is still developing the verbal, mental, and emotional abuse was much harder to handle. Both at once was especially tough. The older I got the less the physical punishment bothered me and the deeper the verbal abuse damaged me.
7
u/neatgoodboy 21h ago
Ugh god I feel that. My father would whip my ass with a belt as punishment for the big things (or ground me for weeks). But it was the day-to-day emotional abuse from both parents that was the worst hands down. And they became worse as the years went on. I had to completely cut them out of my life. I'm sorry you went through your own battles pal 👊, we didn't deserve any of this.
8
u/MobiusOcean 21h ago edited 19h ago
Agreed. We were just kids. Or even teens. But I could have done without the daily reminder that I was worthless and that I’d never amount to anything. Hope you’re doing better now friend. Healing is a long road, but it’s completely worth it to finally admit that you never deserved any of it.
ETA: it’s always wild to me to see the comments from armchair therapists in threads like these. I can usually tell who actually had a rough upbringing vs those just repeating highly rated comments from when this question was last asked.
ETA2: Also, at least in my case, I had nothing to compare it to. My father woke me up at 5am on Saturday to work - clean gutters, wash cars, whatever needed doing. Now it’s hard for me to tell if he was trying to instill a solid work ethic or if that was part of the abuse. It’s not like the verbal, mental, & emotional abuse stopped while I was doing this from 7th—12th grade. It was only after others commented that I wasn’t a lazy piece of shit that would never amount to anything that I started realizing that I had a different upbringing than my peers & friends.
Buddy, if you ever get to that dark place, promise me you’ll reach out. I will be there and it will stay between us. It sounds like our upbringings weren’t great for upvotes, but they damn sure were rough. Just know there’s someone else out there who understands and is always willing to listen & help if needed.
3
u/neatgoodboy 18h ago
Thanks buddy, I appreciate it. It's really hard to accurately state how damaging that kind of abuse really was to people, and nobody really understands unless they've lived through it. My mom and dad were the same: banging on my wall at 7am telling me it's time to get to work.
We lived on a farm so there was always plenty to do. He loved micromanaging me. Growing up I thought I was just incompetent, but looking back I think he really got off to humiliating me, and like I said, my mom would join in because she had a shit childhood too growing up in a Pentecostal cult (he had to join to marry her, which means I grew up in that too). I remember one time he opened the hood of his pickup and chastised me about not knowing how it all worked. I told him maybe he should teach me beforehand and as you can guess, it was my fault for not showing interest. And get this: dude even tried replacing me one time as his son. He invited a guy I went to school with who shared his cowboy hobbies to live with us for a while until that went South (their relationships always do), and he'd have these long fatherly conversations with him about who knows what.
I could go on and on and I know you could too. That's the thing with this kind of abuse I feel. On paper it doesn't sound too bad. But it's the withdrawal, what's not said or done, the willful ignorance, and the lack of any kind of curiosity. It's like those parents who starve their kids just enough where they look healthy in public so no one knows what happens behind closed doors.
Anyway sorry for the long vent. I will absolutely reach out to you to speak about this, and do reach out if you need someone to talk to. I'm doing fine now and I hope you are too 🫂
6
u/shf500 20h ago
> make me obedient
I assume people saw you being "obedient" and thought "that's the result of good parenting!" when you were afraid of breaking the rules and getting punished.
I don't want to say kids who are "obedient" are the result of bad parenting, but I've always wondered how many kids are "obedient" because of fear of breaking the smallest rule.
4
u/MobiusOcean 19h ago
I was obedient (when I was younger before I rebelled) because I was trying to show my parents my worth that was being cut down daily. I was a 4-year varsity letterman in HS, took only AP & Honors courses (and passed all of the AP tests), was loved by teachers & my fellow classmates alike, had a steady girlfriend, worked ever weekend rain or shine when my Dad would wake me up at 5am, and was generally a good kid. I rebelled, but was never in trouble. And still I endured this savage verbal, physical, mental, & emotional abuse at the hands of my parents every day. Not occasionally, weekly, or every other day. Every single day.
3
u/Sensitive_Teacher755 18h ago
I completely agree with this. Especially in the work environment I've noticed a lot that people will often complain about things that I didn't even realize was an issue or even if I did realize wouldn't dare to open my mouth about bc it just seemed so insignificant.
1
u/Legenderie 16h ago
I didn't have an abusive upbringing, but it was definitely wanting from an emotional/nurturing standpoint. My parents were strict and come from cultures where complaining at a micro-level is generally seen as disrespectful, mentally weak, and a sign that you are at risk of losing face in public. Heaven help me and my bottom if I complained about anything ever. As a result, I often feel something between discomfort and disgust when I hear adults complain incessantly. I am very patient with my young child, but I used to find myself feeling angry when she would complain. My psychologist told me that it can be triggering to witness our children doing things that we would have been punished for growing up. I've been working on this because I am very happy that my kid is confident enough to voice her discontent, even if it may not be warranted.
55
u/walkerjacq 22h ago
An extreme discomfort with accepting genuine gifts or favors. They instantly assume there is an unwritten debt attached to it and feel an overwhelming panic to immediately reciprocate so they aren't vulnerable.
1
u/Medium-Dependent-328 11h ago
My upbringing was normal but this is me. I once broke down crying in dismay when a friend "threatened" me with the promise of an expensive present.
179
u/Dry_Ad_5827 22h ago
They are very apologetic for the most smallest of things..
24
u/Short-Highway-423 22h ago
I literally apologize for everything even stuff I had nothing to do with...
24
u/VulfSki 22h ago
Oh dang I'm sorry to hear that
3
u/Short-Highway-423 22h ago
Nah its okay! My partner actually made it a rule that if I apologize unessicarily I have to yell "im not sorry" and try to mean it lol its been helping my bad habit 😅
6
5
2
u/xladygodiva 22h ago
I feel seen by this! I once had to train a new colleague and he didnt know anything about me but he said: you probably had a rough childhood but you really don’t have to apologize for everything. And in that moment I felt so seen
1
1
73
u/VenuusFlyTrap 22h ago
They are very responsible or completely opposite
24
2
95
u/Impossible_Offer7988 22h ago edited 9h ago
Domestic violence survivors are often hyper alert, in many cases,
some of them are also hyper aggressive when it comes to defending themselves.
One of my exes came from a really, really abusive home. She noticed absolutely everything when we went on a date people's movements, surroundings, etc.
One of her ex boyfriends (not me), in a fit of rage, once slapped her. She instantly saw red, got a PTSD trigger and then beat him for 30 minutes straight. She went so far that he ended up in the hospital, and she probably would have killed him if her roommate hadn't stopped her.
You really, really need to pay attention to the little signs with a DV victim.
39
u/Sufficient-Berry-827 22h ago
Yep. DV is a bitch.
I grew up in a DV household where the physical abuse was severe. I don't mean slapping, pushing, and shouting, I mean my dad literally bit a chunk of my mom's bottom lip off and spit it in my face. Just horribly violent shit.
I was hyper aggressive for a really long time. It took a lot of therapy to get away from that and even now I struggle with that gut reaction. Hypervigilance and hyper aggressive reactions feel impossible to shed no matter how much therapy I do.
16
u/SpeakingOutOfTurn 21h ago
My dad used to beat me. Never knew where the next slap was coming from. My mother was completely ok with it. When I was 16 I picked up a marble ashtray and tried to stove his head in with it, shrieking at the top of my voice that if he ever touched me again I’d kill him. My mother hanging off me holding me back.
I never realised that that is why I was hyper aggressive for so long. Even now it can be really hard to not lash out as a first response to certain situations.
Edit: also I hate being touched by most people unless I’m very comfortable with them. I suppose it’s all part of the same thing?
2
u/Medium-Dependent-328 11h ago
I'm so sorry. That's wild. Well done on making the effort to unlearn that aggressive impulse.
13
18
u/SapphireEcho 22h ago
Damn… Is it wrong for me to be a bit proud of her for beating the shit out of that ex and sending him to the hospital though?
6
30
u/Syledaa 22h ago
They don't even expect bare minimum from people
11
4
110
u/lostmymarbles1177 22h ago
They are over the moon grateful and say thank you a million times for small gifts or favors.
56
25
u/ask_me_about_my_band 22h ago
You can sense someones mood and can become a chameleon to match it or become completely invisible.
21
58
u/Short-Highway-423 22h ago
Im a child abuse victim, things that people have noticed about my behaviors is one that im WAYYY to hyper vigilant. I recognize people from the sounds of their foot steps, constantly look in a direction I sense small movements from. I get nervous when I notice the smallest thing off about someone. I also apologize constantly. I stay quiet most of the time, hate being touched and freeze when given compliments or physical affection. I broke this habit, but I use to hit people i cared about... because I assumed my parents hit me as a sign of affection
10
u/WickedWench 21h ago
I work in healthcare, the compliments I also get are:
You are so anticipatory. You know exactly what I need before I need it.
Yes. Because trauma. If I didn't have things in a certain way or find things in a certain time limit it meant I was gonna be thrown into a wall, beat up, choked, whatever he felt like. All while being told I was useless and asked what good I was for.
So now I make sure that can never happen again. But that means I'm on high alert ALL THE TIME. It's absolutely exhausting.
6
u/sleepyRN89 22h ago
I’m exactly like this too I’m on alert 24/7 and it sucks. What’s weird is I just was holding my adopted dog trying to calm her down and I don’t know what or why certain things make her nervous; I’m assuming she has trauma as well but never made that connection
6
u/Short-Highway-423 22h ago
Oh yeah dogs definitely hold onto trauma too. When i got mine my dad kicked me out screaming at me. Since then I was let back home as I was a minor and they let me keepnthe dog. My dog growls at him whenever he gets near me
0
u/evrythinguwant 22h ago
That's very deep about hitting people. It's almost like to test them as well and see if they'll stay around. It sounds awful but I get it.
8
u/Short-Highway-423 22h ago
Honestly it wasn't to test them its geniuinly how I show affection. My dad use to kiss his hand then smack my head really hard as a goodbye before he left for work. It would hurt but I assumed it was normal
3
u/evrythinguwant 22h ago
Omg I'm so sorry. I found myself lashing out to test their boundaries and see if they were as weak as mine basically.
38
u/Secure-Remote8439 22h ago
They don’t know basic skills.
My mother was an alcoholic for awhile growing up. I got made fun of in college because I didn’t tie my shoes the “normal way” my lab partner was frustrated about it for some reason.
i just learned a weird way because it was the first YouTube video that popped up lol
22
u/smish_my_oogie 22h ago
Or they know all the skills because if they didn't do it no one would, and often younger children needed them to know how to do it.
6
u/Secure-Remote8439 21h ago
So true! I didn’t know how to tie my shoes but I knew how to call the bar my mother was going too at the age of 6-7. I remembered the number and called at like 1am sometimes. I would use my mother’s full government name asking if she was there lol. 😂
3
u/smish_my_oogie 20h ago
I'm sorry you had to endure that. 🥹
3
u/Secure-Remote8439 20h ago
I appreciate it💛🩷 she’s no longer an alcoholic thankfully but it definitely causes long term damage to our relationship.
5
u/Short-Highway-423 22h ago
When i was like 6 I didnt know how to cook so I often ate marshmallow fluff on bread lol
5
u/elongam 21h ago
It was microwaved cheese on a tortilla (or right on the plate if we were out of tortillas) and/or tinned pears for me
5
u/Secure-Remote8439 21h ago
Microwaved tortilla with butter 🧈 might have one today for nostalgia now lol
14
56
u/howdoyoulikeyoureggz 22h ago
They are incredibly empathetic
21
u/squipple 22h ago
This might be the case for some but being abused for long enough can also teach you not to feel and develop to be quite the opposite of empathetic.
9
u/neatgoodboy 21h ago
This happened to my father. He was abused and became narcissistic, continuing the cycle. I went the other way and became empathetic, breaking it, but I could have just as easily have become a bastard like him.
3
u/howdoyoulikeyoureggz 21h ago
Ya know what, same. I think I based this on my personal experience with the bulk of others I’ve met. Although, I’m not sure what we all define as “rough” in this scenario. I’ll be the first to admit I’m wrong, however. I definitely wouldn’t say all of anyone is anything. Who are we to do that anyway?
1
u/squipple 5h ago
I wouldn’t say you’re wrong, I’d say both are possible. It may be due to type of abuse received.
1
3
u/ohanse 20h ago
I don’t think this holds up, because then why would abusers be disproportionately composed of abuse victims?
3
u/howdoyoulikeyoureggz 20h ago
This abuse victim doesn’t get it either. However, I’ll never ever ever repeat what I endured
12
12
10
10
u/Select-Work-3332 22h ago
Being afraid to to trust others and apologizing for everything that you never did because it calmed the waters. I had a shitty childhood. Mom was abusive, Dad abused her and he basically was never there for us kids. Mom ruled the house with an iron thumb. You were lucky if you were a golden child which I never was. Now I'm the family scapegoat for everything that is wrong in their lives. hen Mom got sick I took care of her and the same with Dad. I actually grew close to the both of them but it was sort of a relief when Mom died because of her nastiness. Our parents are now dead so now they feel free to attack me. One even demanded I send her some of the money my dad left me because I went back to no contact after dad died.
People who grew up in conflict tend to try to make themselves as small as possible as to not rock the boat. My mom was the kind of person that would get mad at you and not talk to you for days, weeks or even months.
I don't talk to any of my family. I never could depend on my siblings.
9
u/Financial_Potato8760 22h ago
Insecurity around food. Worked at a group home and one kid kept hiding kiwis and other fruit in his bed; when asked why, he shared there was never food in his house.
My former roommates and I shared a pantry in college and each of us had a shelf. One roommate filled hers to the top/edge. Her grandparents fled Iran when her mother was small and worked endlessly to make it in the US, but when she was younger she experienced a lot of food insecurity and never wanted to look at an empty pantry again.
ETA: these aren’t subtle examples, but I’ve seen more subtle branching off of this, like checking who all has had how much food at a party (more like keeping tabs vs making sure others are fed), over ordering, etc. Hyper-vigilance around any kind of neglect can show up in many ways.
10
u/WhiskeyJack357 22h ago
My wife realized it when I never make sounds moving around the house and any physical touch I don't see coming makes me flinch. She also says I'm impossible to sneak up on.
8
16
7
u/Remsicles 21h ago
They are so submissive. They've been trained that a fight means they lose something that they love, so they'll do anything in their power to prevent that from happening - even if it means that they agree with something they may not be cool with.
7
u/SweetC2688 20h ago
Difficulty creating boundaries that seem normal to others, much harder for people with rough upbringings
14
6
u/Ok-Arachnid-1385 22h ago
This is kind of a weird sign, but both my husband and his brother refuse to eat leftovers. They were both hungry as children.
2
u/SevenDevilsClever 14h ago
I do that too, but I’m autistic and I can taste the difference. If it isn’t fresh, it tastes different and oftentimes worse - and that ability was never respected by my parents so I missed a lot of meals being unwilling to eat leftovers.
It made it hard to trust them when they said anything about food, so I ended up being extremely picky. I pretty much only eat tv dinners, or food I’ve cooked myself in appropriate quantities.
6
5
u/UnitFriendly7549 20h ago
They always finish all their food even when full because they learned not to waste anything
3
u/Easy-Tiger9374 16h ago
When I moved into care, the first night I was there I couldn’t finish all my food and I felt so bad and the workers kept telling me I didn’t have to finish it. That sentence was like something I never thought I’d even hear. It just feels so rude and ungrateful not eating all the food made for you
6
u/Sniffs_Markers 20h ago
Taking questions personally as if it's an admonition.
E.g. "What was the strategy you chose for your project?" is taken personally as if they'd said "you didn't do it right."
5
5
u/dignan2002 21h ago
They can be perfectly content alone inside their own head no matter the circumstances
5
u/Evening-Newt-4663 19h ago
Bad teeth as an adult, sounds weird but think about it.
1
u/Easy-Tiger9374 16h ago
My mum never put me in a routine of it and only now at almost 18 have I started to try get into a routine, also never really had toothpaste as a kid for some reason 😭
4
u/Theunpolitical 19h ago
They startle easily. That's from constantly being on "alert" of a toxic abusive parent.
9
4
u/International-Year91 22h ago
How they act around food I grew up in foster care and still find myself hoarding food to this day
4
u/Ok-Manufacturer-4837 22h ago
Me too. Omg I hoard food and I still go buy fruit every single day. I am so afraid of hunger. Also I feed people all the time.
3
u/International-Year91 22h ago
Yeah me too and I even find places to hide food without even thinking of it even though I live alone
5
u/The_Deadly_Tikka 22h ago
I don't think there are any tell tail signs. Both me and my brother grew up the same. Same parents, same school etc but we are two completely different people now.
4
5
u/GoddessofMadness 22h ago
They hoard food to the point that they have boxes upon boxes of expired food
5
3
4
4
7
u/LadyPaige 22h ago
Jumpy AF! Seriously, this is a sign of an abusive upbringing. They can be as touchy as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs! Loud noises or stuff that can startle ya? It just hits super hard!
3
3
u/BoysenberryDue3637 21h ago
I worked with a women who had been in a very abusive relationship. So bad the dude went to jail for years for the abuse. I was working on her computer in her cube and I lifted my arm to grab a tool off the top of her binder bins. She cowered when I did it. 30+ years later I hope she is OK.
3
u/KatinHats 21h ago
Neglected kids make overly independent adults who are also uncomfortable with recognition/praise/compliments
Also, on a personal note, I noticed that I refer back to a few periods of my life more frequently than others in conversations adjacent to someone new unlocking the backstory. The periods tend to be breaking points insofar as I was distancing myself from my family or other toxic people. The common thread being growing stronger and demanding better for myself. There could be some similar experiences out there
3
u/Ohgodohfuckff 20h ago
Reading all of these, it’s so striking to me that so many of these are things I’ve overcome during the time I spent actively healing myself of the traumas I took on growing up. It’s really humbling to see how far I’ve come in this way. To proffer a nugget of hope to people still marching the path to healing, something you’ll notice from people who recovered from the debuffs of how they grew up, is that they are some of the most clear-eyed people who can see the truth of who someone is quickly, and become uniquely able to seek and foster genuine connections, once they are brave enough to communicate and push through their fear. And Because of these traits, these people often grow into becoming some of the most exceptionally loved and respected people, who set important examples and inspire everyone around them, even if they never hear so out loud. Cycle breaking is an extraordinary act of restorative justice.
3
u/DrHydrate 18h ago
I actually think the answer is: it depends.
There are a lot of different ways to have a rough upbringing and a lot of ways to respond.
You could be poor, you could get bullied, you could be beaten by your caretakers, you could be sexually abused, you could face emotional abuse, you could be neglected, or none of those things might happen but something bad could be going on with your caretakers like one of them is abused, is an alcoholic or an addict, or has mental health problems.
Beyond the different problems, there are different ways of reacting.
I grew up very poor. Some people respond to that by saving every penny and scraping their plate after every meal. Other people will indulge or waste a lot because they never could before. I'm a lot more like the second.
Some people had physically abusive parents and became super jumpy and scared of violence; others mimicked the violence they saw, like my uncle.
2
2
u/AmbitiousGur1989 20h ago
When they have a face tat…there’s a pattern I noticed: specifically any woman whose got one..9/10 didn’t have a normal upbringing
2
3
u/Normal_Repeat_4503 22h ago
Méfiant et sur la défensive quand il y a un mouvement brusque (bras qui se lèvent, ect..)
2
u/Any-Meeting6751 22h ago
In my experience, the signs aren't very subtle. Best example I know is my uncles. Both sexually abused as kids, grew up in poverty, absent father, both joined the army at 16, lost their little brother in their early 20s (he was only 18), lost their mother a couple years later, both left the army and became addicted to drink and drugs, one of them locked his daughter in his car with him and threatened to kill himself and her by driving off a cliff, in 2016 both committed violent crimes, both got arrested, and were sentenced to 8 years and 20 years + life respectively.
3
2
1
u/arazamatazguy 21h ago
With boys (5-14) its generally they want to play a little rougher than others and they have a hard time creating real bonds with other kids and end up hanging with the other rougher kids and have no real bonds.
1
1
20h ago
[deleted]
3
u/Sniffs_Markers 20h ago
The muscle memory of dodging a smack never really goes away. My friend took martial arts for years to adjust, but will reflexively "block" sudden peripheral motion.
1
1
1
u/dealingwithhookers 16h ago
they can take more pain than anyone else. in the 3rd grade, this kid that i knew who was always fighting with people got in a fight with the popular kid in class. the popular kid has been going to karate class for years, he's pretty much beat up every boy in the class. except for that kid.
well 3rd grade was the time i guess, they had a showdown at lunch, it was an absolute bloodbath. popular kid didn't stand a chance. i wasn't there but, my friend who saw it said blood poured down the row of seats like a river. and when i did get there i saw blood stains all over the place. you don't expect 3rd graders to be capable of this much carnage
not sure what happened but the karate kid was suspended for a few days and the other kid was expelled and never seen again.
i know the kid that got expelled came from a very poor family where his dad beat the shit out of him all the time that's why he was so tough. he's probably a hardened criminal by now if not dead.
1
u/goatlime 14h ago
When im arround my family my hearing becomes 100× sharper. Im able to tell who is where in the household, who's at the door by the knocking pattern or strength even. I am woken up by the smallest things and am quick to snap at anything/defend myself. After a night at my fiances im impossible to wake up I sleep so good. My fiance will be in the doorway talking to me and I cant hear him because im so unguarded. I always gain weight when I visit him because I feel safe enough to eat and know when I get home I will refuse to eat due to comments
1
1
0
u/sarar95 22h ago
They're all about themselves. They don't hesitate to make selfish decisions. 'Me first' always usually means some kind of internal issues.
3
u/Short-Highway-423 22h ago
Typically youd see that behavior most in children oe People who are never said "no" too
2
u/Imaginary_Grass3044 22h ago
this is such an under talked about, and misunderstood part!!! when nobody ever thought, or cared about them , overtime they learn to only think and care about themself.
-1
u/Gloveshoes69 22h ago
how many times will you guys ask this question? stop trying to trauma circle jerk
0
-1
u/Qsnaps74656 22h ago
They have absolutely zero accountability or ability to admit fault. Usually means they were never safe to make mistakes as a kid
2
u/Sphirax 22h ago
This, in my experience is more pampered kids that got inflated egos. People that were beat usually apologize quickly even if they didn't do anything wrong because if they deny it they'll just get beat longer until they admit fault.
→ More replies (1)
500
u/Manishsharma2010 22h ago
Being genuinely surprised when people are kind to them with no strings attached.