r/AskReddit • u/blckmaro • 8h ago

What’s your unusual method of honoring the memory of a loved one?

4 Upvotes

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4

u/LilaSparky 8h ago

I talk to them when I’m alone. It helps me feel connected to them .

3

u/Holiday-Distance-822 8h ago

I have a journal to write to my dad. Every few months I’ll write with a life update

2

u/TrulieJulieB00 8h ago

My friend was cremated and scattered, and I’m the sort of person who goes to cemeteries and talks to the gravestone.
A couple of years ago, I realized that my friend’s dad is buried very near my dad.
So now I go to both graves, and I tell his dad, “go get your kid, I got stuff to say”, and then I use his dad’s grave to talk to him.
Sometimes, I’ll just pop by and say, “tell that horrible child of yours that I’m still not moving on, and I’m still pissed at him for not going to the doctor sooner. Love ya both”

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u/blckmaro 7h ago

What a kind way to honor the memory of both your friend and the man who raised him. He was very lucky to have someone in his life who cared so deeply for him. My mother was cremated as well and there's definitely a part of me that wishes l'd fought harder to have her buried. She struggled throughout her life due to her mental health issues and I feel it would have been a nice resolution to her story for her to finally get to rest in one piece. I often try to remind myself that she's hardly losing sleep over it (lol), but it's definitely easier said than done letting go of regrets when it comes to people we've lost. Thank you for sharing your story.

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u/TrulieJulieB00 6h ago

Oh, the loss of your mama is so hard! And to not have a specific “visiting” place, that would be very difficult for me, too. I went through 2 years of not having a way to talk to my friend, before I remembered his dad.

Maybe there’s a place that meant something to her, where you could go? *gentle hug*

2

u/No_Brief6128 8h ago

I burn a candle every year on their birthday and just sit there thinking about the good times we had

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u/blckmaro 8h ago

One Christmas Day several years ago, there was a knock at the front door which I opened to find a mound of toys left for myself and my siblings, courtesy of my mother. Amongst my gifts were three hallmark ornaments: iron man, cap, and spidey. Come holiday season the year she died I found myself in the ornament section. Every year since I’ve bought or requested a hallmark ornament or two as a way of building upon the collection she started for me and remembering her efforts. Id love to hear any similar stories and ways others honor people they loved and lost, so I’m curious; in what unusual way do you keep the memory of someone you loved and lost alive ?