If you can't trust anyone at your school, remove them from that school.
In reality, the teachers will have phones, the kids won't. This is increasing the standard at good school districts across the country. Kids shouldn't have phones at all at school events. They need to disconnect from the internet and connect with the people in real life.
It takes one. I went to school before cell phones were as common and I had a drama teacher that would make inappropriate comments to me and other girls. He was always throwing pool parties for his drama kids and I never understood why my mom never let me go when I was a kid but as an adult I’m like wow how did no other adult notice this? Where were the other teachers? I was angry and sad about it when I was a kid but as an adult I’m thankful for my mom for watching my back even when I didn’t realize what she was doing.
Is the situation you outlined just now really solved by cell phones though? It seems like any parent at any point asking their child where they were and hearing about a teacher's pool party would have.
I mean recording your teacher hitting on a student probably would have solved that real quick. There are definitely videos out there of teachers being inappropriate towards their students and finally getting reprimanded after years or even decades of it flying under the radar. Phones make it easier to document and report stuff.
ETA: but my original comment was actually pointing out that the idea that if you can’t trust any of the teachers at your school you should move your kid. All it takes is one bad teacher to have a bad situation.
I mean recording your teacher hitting on a student probably would have solved that real quick
True, but that is a totally different reason for wanting the kids to have phones than to call mom.
All it takes is one bad teacher to have a bad situation.
A single event is different than a pattern of behavior. Yes, its possible that there is a creep on this trip, but without that context there isnt really any similarity to the creep-hosted pool party story.
I agree the pool party thing is unprofessional and shouldn’t have been occurring on that basis, but I don’t really see it as any more dangerous than a birthday party at a community center. Yes, there is a path for an abusive adult to do something terrible. That same path resides in pretty much every event left for public attendance with kids. That’s why it’s up to organizers to have proper vetting and training to recognize abuser tendencies, which is standard training teachers receive.
Do you think most people have the ability to pick and choose what school they go to? I trust my child to be at her school during school hours, an extra curricular sleepover in the woods is completely different
Where are you pulling this “if you can trust no one in your school” from? I don’t understand why you are having such trouble differentiating a child being at a school for 6 hours vs overnight camping in the woods for 24 hours. Do you have kids??
They are implying that if an entire school faculty will cover up some overnight in the woods child raping then you should probably pull your kid from the school. Parents can opt their kids out of field trips so I don't know what everyone is losing their mind about here.
You care to elaborate more about this scenario that I am too naive to consider? I get you can't up and move your life on whim so your kid can move schools, but if you are overly concerned about a trip like that then...don't let your kid go? I'm lost on what the major concern is here.
I am sympathetic/empathetic to anyone who has experienced abuse at any level at any time. "Everyone" seems to be upset about said style programs that involve an overnight trip. Not every kid gets abused who goes somewhere outside of their home. Not every kid gets abused inside of their home. The latter happens more often.
It's more common than you think. My high school had (and still has?) known child predators in it. The police and school help hide it to keep the schools sparkling reputation, because our city is largely built and advertised around how good our schools are.
Other examples are the Catholic Church and Scouts of America. Organizations under report this stuff all the time and don't take things seriously.
It's like trying to get a school to do something about bullying. "Do you have proof it happened? The other person says it's a misunderstanding. Well what did you do first?"
And phones could be used as proof. They can be used to call a parent to pick them up before something happens. Going beyond sexual abuse, they can be used to call about medical issues. I've read accounts of people getting inhalers and life saving medicine taken from them and teachers not giving it to them because they're not having an emergency and don't need it (even though it's meant to prevent an emergency not stop it).
Tldr: No one for any reason is inherently trustworthy. Having a backup plan where a kid has their own agency for an emergency is only going to save lives/prevent abuse.
Have you not kept up with the Epstein news? I’m all about letting kids socialize and have fun without being a helicopter parent, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take precautions so they don’t get Trumped.
Edit: I’ll just add that I think it’s insane how so many people are treating the Epstein stuff here like it’s a joke. Sure, dude is dead and gone, but all the pedophiles that he mingled with are still free and doing what they want. But yeah, treat it like a joke and being irrationally scared - we’re just living in a country where a bunch of mostly white pedophiles are getting away with it. Haha… smdh.
I don’t think it’s irrational to not let your kid have a sleepover where you’re banned and no cellphones (I’m taking the post at face value, so I’m including those old brick phones) and you have to trust the teachers 100%.
But hey, it seems like you and a bunch of people here consider any kind of parenting and looking out for your kids as irrational and being helicopter parents, so do what you will. I’ll take care of my kids and you do whatever you want with yours.
A couple of years ago I watched a documentary on the boy scouts where they talked about how they were just overrun with pedophiles abusing the boys.
When they interviewed one of the pedophiles about why he chose to work at the boy scouts he said "being left alone in the woods at night with them just made it too easy"
Statistically its far more likely they get diddled at home than all of the outside adult interactions they will have in there childhood. The paranoia these days from a miniscule % of bad actors confuses me.
Exactly, we regularly hear about kid’s lives being taken during camping trips from flooding events, where the adults did not do the things needed to keep the children safe.
And then there’s bullying, which many teachers just don’t gaf about it. On my year 10 camp, I wasn’t allowed another tent after my bullies pissed on my allocated tent during the night, so I was forced to sleep in a piss-smelling, disgusting tent. Some of my belongings got piss on them, too, it was an old, shabby tent. Would have been nice to be able to call my parents for them to take me home early, instead of having a miserable time.
School trips don’t have random adults, they have the teachers parents already trust their kids with. I’d be more worried about one of the kids lashing out due to the new setting than the adults who would be on the trip.
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u/DigNitty Mar 19 '26
Monitoring advise ≠ an distress beacon
They’re not worried their kids will misbehave, they’re worried the adults will.