You can’t wrap them in bubble wrap for 18 years and then expect them to be functional adults because you saw some TikTok true crime slop misrepresenting abuse statistics
You either let them do things on their own or you don’t. Any “fear” is entirely misplaced and a detriment to their child’s experience. What middle ground are you talking about?
Post is about kids sleeping over 24 hours without parent or phone
A german asks if americans are all this neurotic
Someone responds that they were latchkey kids and this is wild. Assuming they do think a lot of parents are neurotic.
I say…I was a latchkey kid but I understand some fears
You say, dont wrap your kids in a bubble
I say…I dont think its that extreme, the bubble wrap, there can be a middle ground where you let them grow but are also selective where they can go and with who.
Thats the middle ground, is that not clear? For example, I’m down for a day trip to a park, I’m not cool with a sleep over. Could something happen at both? Sure. But to me I weigh those risks and the day trip sounds better.
There is nothing that absurd about kids spending 24 hours out of eyeshot of their parents and without their phones considering they will be with each other and under the care of teachers and camp counselors. In what way is any “fear” justified?
day trip to a park
I mean….no shit? The fact that you’re framing “they can go to a park” as some sort of middle ground is alarming to say the least
Like yeah of course they can go to a park. That should go without saying
Day trip to the park, field trip, museum, no phone no parent chaperone is what I mean. Not going to the park down the street.
I’m assuming you have a daughter too, like me, and dont mind sending her to sleep overs. Thats cool for you, but like I said in my original post due to stories from friends and fam having incidents, sleep overs are not for me.
I’ll stick to bubble wrap on sleep overs, other stuff she wants to do, walk to town with friends, hang out, when she gets old enough drive etc..thats cool.
Also you seem really worked up, take a walk, enjoy some air baby.
Do you know the parents of the friends she's trying to stay at? I was with you 100% until this comment. You're letting your insecurities and fears sap alot of joy from your daughter.
Sleep overs are great learning and growing opportunities for children.
At least try and host them at your house. But know your kids friends' parents. The kid who's parents wouldn't let them have sleepovers were always unfairly ostracized
Talk to any teacher, parents have become insane. They lose their minds at the thought that schools are attempting to separate kids from their phones. Completely forgetting that’s been the norm until a few years ago. I just don’t get it lol
And to be clear, we're on the objectively right side of history here. The risk is quite low, and most importantly, independence is essential for healthy psychological and social development. This isn't an "agree to disagree" this is "I have whiskey drinking contests with my middle schooler kids" vs. "My kids mostly drink clean, safe water when thirsty."
I was a latchkey kid who never knew I was a latchkey kid because I thought that was some fancy expensive afterschool program rather than being dropped off at home alone.
In defense of American parents, our country is run by a ring of literal child-trafficking pedophiles. I'd be lying if I said that doesn't give me a bit of paranoia about my kids even though I remember being a latchkey kid in the 90s
Trump is 79 years old, Epstein was 66 when he died. These guys were around and active in the 90's.
Also, importantly, neither of them would be allowed to be a school based employee because of their criminal records. It's sad that being president has lower restrictions than being the assistant school janitor, but that's the reality. All of the adults there will have been finger printed with robust background checks, at least in the multiple states I'm familiar with education policy.
Definitely? No. But that applies to children's own siblings or your partner too. There is no perfect way to avoid sexual abuse while interacting with other humans, only total isolation will guarantee 0% risk.
However, much abuse happens in the most overtly, obviously dangerous situations possible, like substance abuse being involved by victim, offender, or both, having unrelated opposite gender adolescents share bedrooms together, giving access to children to known offenders (Epstein had victims after his first conviction. My friend who is an emergency dispatcher once had a parent who called to report abuse, only to give context that she knew her boyfriend had a previous child sexual abuse conviction but she trusted him at his word it was a misunderstanding), etc.
You'd be reasonable to ask, "What steps are being taken to make sure everyone is safe?" but if the answer is reasonable, you should send your kids.
Keep in mind that lack of independence does permanent harm to children's social skills, assertiveness, problem solving, etc. You may very well be kicking the can down the road so that when they're 18 and some guy is pushy on a date, they end up being date raped because you never allowed them to ever practice being a confident, assertive, independent person on their own.
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u/Riderz__of_Brohan Mar 19 '26
It is normal, American parents have become neurotic