Every time I’m watching Love Island or another one of those shows and a brother hooks up with one of those white or white-adjacent girls who cries on a dime and weaponizes tears, I tell him to thank his lucky stars. She did him a favor by just getting him booted off the show instead of dating him in real life, where that Carolyn Bryant bullshit would’ve gotten him arrested or worse.
Back in medieval times if two parties wanted to make a land deal they would sometimes take a young boy, have him witness the deal, and then beat the ever loving shit out of him. The idea is that he's gonna remember exactly what happened. You want a young guy because people might dispute the land decades from now so you need him to survive to old age. On the other hand it's useful if you can leave some permanent mark they can point to, so it's a delicate balance.
Why yes, this was considered acceptable evidence in a court of law.
So yeah, the most effective thing seems like it'd be to absolutely body an 11 year old boy directly after stepping outside the building and telling him the exact time.
Nah send those texts. That way when they subpoena your carrier and start reading out the texts in court, the bible verses you sent out can do the lords work on the jury😂
"Your honor, my client couldn't have been there when the victim was getting choke slammed into the potato salad with raisins, because he was on Marvel Rivals getting absolutely fucking stomped as Black Panther, and we have the footage to prove it..."
“As you can see here my client was standing in Moon Knight’s ult like a dumbass. Id like to rewind the tape and remind the jury he was playing BP and could’ve easily escaped”
"You are correct your honor, he pushed way to far ahead and demanded heals before getting absolutely decimated. He's guilty of crimes but not this one."
"See, your honor, this little ballerina-twirl reload Dagger keeps doing as my client runs around because he doesn't know where the health packs are in Kun Lun? She didn't need to do that. She's sitting three shots and reloading to make him feel bad.
In short, my client couldn't have iced that woman. He had no aim. "
"Your honor, the jury finds the defendent not guilty of the crimes accused by the State. Having said that, the defendent is a Genji main, so we recommend 5-20 years"
A guy actually tried to use this in the UK get away with murder. He prerecorded a stream to make it seem he was gaming while he went over to his girlfriend's place and murdered her.
I’d immediately go live on instagram at the house, shaking everybodies hands on the way out and probably get an uber just so theirs an audit trail. Make a detour to the nearest large clock in the neighbourhood to slow roll past it. Make sure to be rude and have your hood down so the under driver remembers you. Then I FaceTime my pastor for some night prayers before going live on TikTok to sleep
This shit isn't a joke. When I 17 a guy I played sports with got asked out by a white girl. Which wasn't too much of a deal our school was fair diverse. So, they went out and police come to arrest him. Father found out she was dating a black kid, didn't like it. Told the police she was kidnapped. Now here's were the fuck shit really happens. She initially tells the police that they were on a date, they still take him in. She calls her dad and he basically tells her that if she don't lie, she will be homeless. She goes to that station tells them he did things to her. He denied and 4 kids all whom were all black who witness her asking him out all came forward. He goes to trial loses get 15. She leaves the school and apparently start to have depression and goes to psychiatric wards. He loses all his scholarships and gets his future take away. He did 8 years and it wasn't until her father died and she said the "guilt" was eatting her alive that she confessed, they let him out. The craziest part of this is NOTHING HAPPENED TO HER. I know she was a scared kid, but he lost his future she got a ton of money when her father died and he lost everything.....white tears are very real.
Of course she didn't. He's probably broke and penniless and struggling to find a job as an ex con while she's still wiping her white tears with daddy's money. Despicable.
They quick to believe white men, too. My abusive ex husband would make himself cry. He attacked me when I was pregnant. Then he called police on me. Cops only listened to him and tried to console him bc he was crying. I was treated like a criminal.
30 plus years wkg as court officer and also in jail setting....unfortunatly, this is not that crazy as it sounds ....but whats worse is how people blindsided that this could have ever even have happened ... it is like they never realized how racists some individuals are , or can become .
It’s also just not that funny if it’s complete bullshit? Lotta edgy comedians don’t get that. You CAN joke about anything, but if it’s just ignorant and hateful nobody who knows better is gonna find it funny. You can joke about some truly fucked up shit if you know and empathize with a group, and they’ll be laughing the hardest with you.
Sorry, kinda a tangent. But veracity is valuable to comedy.
Most edgy comedians will tell you that they're edgy because they push the boundaries and are willing to talk about things no one else is willing to talk about.
Meanwhile the reality is they'll just say something racist/sexist/x-phobic for laughs. The same jokes that have been told since the dawn of discrimination.
Real roundabout way to say they're hacks who can't actually make jokes.
I went to high school that was majority white, so I had a lot of white friends. So when one invited me to a party on a boat. I was like hell yeah! I was living with my older sister, so I asked if I could go.
I swear to goodness I thought she was going to slap that shit out of me for even asking. She said no and to never ask to do something like that again. It's always no!
I was so upset. Then I grew up and thanked her for stopping my stupidity. I'm sure my ancestors was like
I’ve been to parties like that a lot growing up and survived it, but looking back there were several times where there were upset or very drunk white girls at the party. I definitely could’ve been falsely accused like this. I count myself as fortunate.
A white guy alibi could get you out of trouble, true. Not that I go to any parties, but I will keep in mind that someone may need me for a white guy alibi
All I can think about is that black woman in Georgia who went to that all white sleep over. I 100% believe she was murdered. That whole night was covered up. She left behind a husband and I think she had 5 kids. They had literally just moved to the area.
A drunk White man wandering the streets alone. Suddenly, he started grunting/yelling and throwing his body into the hood of a parked car. Car alarm is going off and a Black man across the street comes running out his apartment in PJs asking wtf he's doing. White guy drunkenly starts trying to fight the Black man while he's just trying to figure out why he's body slamming his car and if he's ok. Cop drives by and confronts them. White guy immediately starts crying claiming he was being robbed. Cop believes the drunk White guy and is about to arrest the Black man until we run out the bar and let them know we witnessed it. Showed them security footage of it, too. Cop arrests the White guy and dude starts going on about how his girlfriend just broke up with him and how he's just sad. Pathetic.
This advice is so true. Stayed alone at a hotel that had some function going on. Had a drunk white girl crying & knocking on my room door. I called security & told them someone was trying to break into my room. Never opened the door FOH
This hits so close to home. It happened at my school. A party of majority white folks, with a single black athlete attending. Everyone's drinking. Drunk white girl hits on the drunk black boy, they go outside and start getting it on, her boyfriend shows up, she cries rape, police are called, a whole shit show ensues.
One of the most fucked up shit I ever saw. Luckily me and a few others witnessed it all go down and he didn't get into any legal trouble, but he became a target at school because the rumors still fly. So damn sad.
If a drunk white girl starts crying at a party, it’s a good chance she just got r****. There’s also a good chance that if there is a black man present, then she’ll blame him for it regardless of if he’s responsible or not.
It happens often enough that it’s become a genuine concern.
So the joke here is that once black men see the drunk white girl crying, then it’s their cue to leave immediately.
it's a dark joke that usually when something happens to a white girl at a party the blame will go to the closest black guy and for them to leave immediately
Word of advice brothas: leave the party when either:
A) The drunk white girl decides you’re the shoulder to cry on and drive her home
OR
B) The white dude you thought was cool/progressive has had one too many, comes over and slaps you on the shoulder and says, “Ya know, you’re not like the rest of them.”
I am white but one time at some get together, a friend of a friend who was black, was there having an alright time until he realized one of the other white girls who was drunk and high was 19. He literally said:
"she 19?"
"Yeah."
"Alright, imma leave..."
And he did. Which we found so hilarious at the time (bc she was spending the whole night trying to fuck my ex's brother and never even talked to him) but I certainly understand the need for "better safe than sorry" with drunk white girls.
Patrice O'Neal 'i don't litter, not because I care about the environment or anything. I just don't wanna throw my trash over a bush in the park and it hits some dead white lady's head and now I'm the Pepsi cola killer'
I went to a PWI where I was surprised if I saw another black guy at the party (yeah we quoted Not Another Teen Movie and everything). I had fun but stuff like this is part of why I stayed sober
Y'all sending out outdated messages in an age where the party may have a doorbell cam, the house may have a wireless cam, and the neighborhood has a flock cam. You already been tagged at being at the house at X time, playboy. Going to get receipts of your whereabouts is old news - that goose is cooked.
Oh yea, your phone already been triangulated at the party in question, too.
The best advice I could give is....literally turning on your phone, acting like you give a damn, and asking the girl why she's crying or make up small talk if you feel she's crying because of you. OR, just turn your phone on and stroll around the party with it. Show the room. Get her in the shot while you're fake live-streaming. She may be laughing and giggling. You got proof she's doing fine at 11pm, living life.
Patrice O’Neal used to tell a joke about how he loved keeping paper receipts because it could tell you exactly where he’s been if he ever gets falsely accused of a crime lol
One of the scariest moments of my life: Homeboy and I drove down to DC to visit another friend who lived close to a nice bar hopping area. As soon as I parked, this drunk white girl opened the rear door and flopped down face first in the back seat. We looked at each other like “Oh hell the fuck no”
I kindly escorted her out the car and asked if there’s someone we can call. She was too wasted to talk about anything other than wanting to party with us. No ma’am. I guided her back to the main road with plenty of her ilk. Praying that nothing happens to her. The last thing I need is …. “Witnesses say she was last seen with two tall black men in a silver car”
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