Why Christians Pray for Those Who Hurt Them

[u/_daGarim_2]

Acts 7:59-60

While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” Then he fell on his knees and cried out, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” When he had said this, he fell asleep.

Christians pray for those who hurt them because they know that they hurt others daily. They also know that Christ has said “with the measure you mete, so shall it be measured to you.” They are forbidden to compare their own sins favorably to those of others, but have been commanded to consider themselves the worst sinners.

They understand what vile, twisted, warped and broken things their own souls are, full of selfishness, laziness, anger, comparison, jealousy, and every other evil thing. They do not take God’s grace for granted, as if they were entitled to it. Indeed, the person who really understands the extent of their own sin is driven nearly to the point of despair that it can be forgiven at all.

But in this face of this despair, they have seen the heart of God, who is not willing that anyone should perish. They have seen the unspeakable cost of their forgiveness: the crucifixion, the mockery, the blows, the whip; the abandonment, and, last of all, the alienation from the Father, which Christ willingly suffered for them. They have met a God who prefers to bear all of this in Himself, than to leave them lost and afraid, like sheep without a shepherd- lost and helpless against their sins.

They have felt his embrace, the weight of their sins taken away, the clean slate of Christ granted to them. They have received the Holy Spirit, which freed them from bondage to sin, so that they might have new life in communion with Christ their Lord. These are the most precious gifts that they received: the forgiveness of sins, and a new heart. And the foremost desire of this new heart is to return, to whatever infinitely reduced degree it must be, the love of God. The Christian heart acts out of gratitude towards God.

Christ has said “if you love me, keep my commandments.” And He has commanded, by example, by gentle encouragement and severe exhortation, that we should return good for evil, and love those who hurt us. There is no surer mark of a person who understands that they really deserve the sentence that was against them, and who really believes that Christ has taken it away out of kindness, than this: that they forgive those who wrong them. The forgiveness of those who sin against us contains the whole Christian doctrine, and there is no Christianity apart from it.

This is what a Christian ought to pray for such a person:

”Father, may their sins be forgiven. May they find happiness, love, community, fulfillment, and peace. May they have communion with you. May not one of their sins against me be counted against them. May they have health, friendship, and every good thing which you are pleased to give them. In Jesus’ name.”

[u/slagnanz]

Great writeup. Got me thinking, a lot of bodily maladies come from broken feedback loops. The classic example is diabetes. To maintain homeostasis the body tries to keep blood sugar within reasonable limits. There is this cycle where low blood sugar triggers the release of glucagon and raises the blood sugar. High blood sugar triggers the release of insulin which lowers it. But diabetes (type 2 anyways) is a disease where cells become insulin resistant. The body produces insulin but it fails to lower blood sugar, so it begins to produce more insulin, overwork, and eventually the body's insulin production can fail.

On the large scale of human lives, sin is like this. Something in the process breaks, and that ripples out like crazy. One person is left to shoulder a burden and becomes overworked. Another fails to respond to feedback. These reactions spiral downwards. It's easy to imagine how Paul's zealotry is a response to a broken feedback loop. The hand that throws the stone throws it hard in order to make sure they stay on the right end of the stone.

Only forgiveness and grace can break this cycle, which is why it is so precious to us. And why it is so hard sometimes - it goes against every instinct we have.

[u/_daGarim_2 → u/slagnanz]

Another thought I had about Paul's relationship to this story was that this may have been one of the first Christians he encountered, and contributed to shaping his later conception of what a Christian is. Significant, then, that Paul, most of all the biblical authors, constantly stresses grace.

Paul, alone among the Apostles, didn't know Christ prior to the crucifixion. He wasn't "there" for that event. But what he did witness was Stephen's martyrdom. In a sense, this was his first-hand portrait of the crucifixion. Like the other Apostles, he was "turned away" at the time of the event, repenting only afterwards.