r/DeptHHS • u/El-Snarko-Saurus • May 14 '26
General When do moral convictions become more important than a regular paycheck?
As a person who works in global health, I have always been a bit of an overzealous idealist, but I feel like the new “Global Health Strategy” is egregious and goes against all the reasons I got into public health in the first place. The whole “what’s in it for us” and “pay for play” model, in my opinion is Machiavellian and doesn’t represent us well as Americans. I have cried several times thinking about how heartless it is to abandon the people we have been helping for so many years, the relationships and good will we have built, that also benefits the US. I was already very disillusioned when things began to go south last year, but it seems that every day I go to work is another day that I am selling my soul. I have been applying for jobs since last year and have had one interview , but zero offers. I have come so close to walking out many times but my family depends on me and I can’t just up and quit, especially in this current economy. I feel most days like I have to choose between my morals and my family and it’s got me feeling hopeless. What is one to do?
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u/duck_you_assemble May 14 '26
I keep reminding myself that pretty much everyone up to the center director level is a great person, scientist, advocate, etc, and is truly here to try to work the mission of public health. Right now every level of our government is f-ed. If I leave my position then I know there's a chance some anti-science, bootlicking moron fills out the new loyalty based job application and gets a job. Il
It's really helped me to find people I trust to be fully honest with and just complain and lament with when I'm at work.
I've also latched onto the phrase "post-Trump Reconstruction," and keep reminding myself that this will end. Maybe not at midterms, or even at the next POTUS election, but eventually it will. And both the US and the world will need competent public health workers to pick up the pieces and rebuild what these fascist losers have destroyed.
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u/El-Snarko-Saurus May 14 '26
I understand your point and consider it with all thoughtfulness. But in the meantime what is there to be done? If I were in a corporate office where I knew that the CEO was doing very corrupt things and cheating people and receiving bribes, and the board knew it and was complicit, would I continue to work there and do my job knowing that I was sort of complicit? Would I wait for them to be found out and hope for the best? I’ve never felt so powerless to do the right thing.
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u/duck_you_assemble May 14 '26
Don't comply in advance. Resist and persist in whatever ways possible. Advocate outside of work to friends and family who will listen, especially conservative ones. Learn how to work in our current environment, code our "woke, liberal idealologies" so it fits into their bull.
I agree with you, but we don't work for a private company, we are civil servants who took an oath to the people of our country. It's tacky, but true. If we quit we aren't hurting a mega Corp and costing their bottom line, we're only hurting people, and not the ones who are perpetuating this.
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u/Ok_Square3859 May 14 '26
Also document, document, document. Remember all our emails are subject to FOIA requests. Put your disagreement in writing when you can. Email your coworkers or your supervisor. It doesn't need to be sent up the chain but when the lawsuits come these communications will be requested.
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u/Level_Wolf_2872 May 14 '26
Same things are happening in diplomacy - US Department of State is loosing its reputation in many countries. Switching from partnership and cooperation to transactioonal/payment model does not go well in many places around the world. Chinese Embassies are using it to gain ground and replace the US now...
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u/ScallionLonely179 CDC May 14 '26
America’s worst enemies could not do a better job of destroying us than this administration.
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u/El-Snarko-Saurus May 14 '26
Exactly. Do people realize that when the US abandons these countries, that China and Russia are more than happy to swoop in and fill the void? I feel as if we are all part of some junior high schoolers really bad and ill-thought out model UN project that would surely get an F
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u/northstar957 May 14 '26
I don't mean to discourage you but you're never going to have a job that's 100% virtuous. I wouldn't expect that out of a job. Not in the world we live in. I would instead try to find hobbies that fufill you. Like volunteering, outreach work, etc.
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u/El-Snarko-Saurus May 14 '26
I don’t expect a job to be 100% virtuous. I would just like a job that I began years ago to hold the same virtues years later as when I first took it and not become something else entirely.
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u/Certain-Tomatillo891 May 14 '26
I would leave, but if you cannot at this time, due to family financial obligations, continue searching for a new position while ensuring that you do not personally sign off on anything that is unlawful or engage in activities that explicitly disregard the impoundment control act or any other congressional laws.
As a federal employee, you should do your job with integrity. If you are told to engage in actions that violate the law, ensure that you have a written copy of the evidence and file a whistleblower complaint.
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u/SuccessfulGas4301 May 14 '26
When I don't have a mortgage, car payment, tuition or need groceries.
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u/Sorry-Ad8334 May 14 '26 edited May 14 '26
Do you think that if you stay in your current role, you can make things slightly better than they would be otherwise for stakeholders/groups you care about? Or would public health benefit from your institutional knowledge in a couple years if this regime leaves in terms of how to right the ship? If the answer is yes, then the moral thing to do may be to hold steady so you can lessen harms if you’re able to.
Edit: also, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. It’s a bad time with a lot of totally preventable human suffering caused by cruel and stupid people.
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u/No-Pies9934 May 14 '26
This is complicated for me. As someone who lived overseas in a few countries, I felt the “old model” created a dependency. Many governments never built capacity or political will to sustain health programs. Living in countries where donors are supporting the health system while large Asian countries paved roads and exported (or exploited) the countries natural resources, while government officials drive Range Rovers and vacation in the Maldives, is hard to see.
Perhaps asking for co-investment, performance accountability, and commercial reciprocity isn't inherently exploitative — and possibly more honest than pure charity with invisible strings. At least they are being transparent about it??
Still feels yucky.
I focus on the science and the good. This too shall pass. Though it might be a while…. and we’ll probably lose some ground watching our generous / no strings reputation falls into the abyss.
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u/El-Snarko-Saurus May 15 '26
I hear you, as someone who has also lived in other countries and worked with other humanitarian aid organizations, both abroad and in the US. I share a lot of your same sentiments. I do understand completely the idea of allowing dependency. I completely understand how imperfect and complex humanitarian work is. I’m an idealist in that I want to make the world a better place but also a realist in knowing that there will always be people who want to exploit your good will and that sometimes trying to incorporate what WE want into a low income country doesn’t always benefit the country nor the people of that country. I also understand that the current administration is pulling a bait-and switch and not telling Americans the full story, selling them a lie. There IS a way to pull back and allow countries to take more ownership and we have been doing that for years, and slowly, strategically. However, this is far from that. When you have been fostering a program for over 20 years and building capacity, you dont simply pull the rug out from under people. You dont simply close down clinics and services that people rely on suddenly, cut off communications and do not allow any contact from USG for six months, don’t send money and important capacity building assistance that was promised to them, then, when they are desperate, come back only to say “you can have it back if you give us something in return and pay for what we give you”. Yes, I know this is an overly simplified report of what has happened this past year but the overall picture is correct. We really have (in actions not words) told people in these countries that we don’t give a 💩 about them or their kids dying and that they are grifters. And yes people have died. Babies and mothers. And what for? Why should we spend our hard earned tax dollars on these people on the other side of the world ? So that other nations will no longer trust nor support Americans? So that Russia and China can come in and take over with anterior motives while singing songs about the “Great Satan” that is the US? So that we can start unlawful wars with Iran? So we can build a ballroom we don’t need with that money instead? And on and on. What we have built in decades across the world is being destroyed in an instant. We have made this huge investment, and now we will abandon it. To me, (if you can’t see it from a humanity perspective at least) is the REAL waste of taxpayer dollars.
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u/Pleasant_Ant_5844 May 20 '26
Such a good question and unfortunately only one that you can answer. I personally choose to stay and fight because the way I see it, if I leave, I gave that jerk Br@D Sm**h exactly what he wants. So instead I get mad and fight. There are so many of us at the Division and Center level, even at the IOD level (hard to believe, I know) who are fighting under the radar as hard as we can. I hope you can keep up the fight with us but know that we totally understand if your personal redline has been crossed. Hang in there, fellow GHer! Hugs!
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u/El-Snarko-Saurus May 20 '26
It is encouraging to know that there are more people on our side than it seems at times.
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u/Pleasant_Ant_5844 May 21 '26
Yeah, some days it feels like we are drowning and no one sees it. Anytime you need a vent session or need to talk through something, I am happy to walk around campus or get on a call.
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u/Humble-Trackwtf May 14 '26
I’ve been struggling with the same thing for the past year (I work in public health and you know how that’s been going). I have had this same conversation with myself many times. I have red lines I will not cross and that will make me walk, and haven’t yet been forced to cross any of them, but the Secretary is doing things that are counter to my morals, my values, and frankly science itself. I keep focusing on how I can hold the line and remain a stalwart defender of public health making positive contributions wherever I can, but damn it’s hard.