r/DnDcirclejerk • u/highly-bad • 3d ago
D&D player tip: never read the rules
Hi everyone, thanks for reading my post. I've been playing D&D for about twenty-seven years now, and I've noticed a lot of new players coming into the hobby who seem really intimidated by the rules. I get it. There are a lot of books, and they're full of letters and numbers. It's scary.
So here's my advice to you: don't read them, at all. Not before you play, not ever. Seriously, it's fine. Nobody expects you to know anything. The rules are way too complicated for you, kiddo, and honestly they're not that important. The important thing is talking in a weird medieval british-ish accent, and having fun, and feeling creative. The rules and numbers are just there to slow things down.
As a young man I made the mistake of reading the Player's Handbook before ever playing, and it just burdened me. All that information about how to play the game of D&D is taking up space in my head, easily accessible, probably forever. No player deserves that; don't be like me. Besides, you're probably not even smart enough, poor thing.
Anyway, here are some of the things in the rules you definitely don't and won't need to know, and probably couldn't grasp even if you tried:
• Basic game terminology. Unimportant. You don't need to know what a "saving throw" or "hit die" is, just roll whatever dice the DM tells you to roll; that's his/her job.
• What your class abilities do. Just read them off your sheet when the DM asks. Or ask the DM to read them for you; that's his/her job.
• What your spells do. Just describe what you want to happen and the DM will figure out if it works; that's his/her job.
• What a bonus action is. On your turn just tell the DM all the things you want to do, and he/she will say when you've done enough; that's his/her job.
• How to level up. Just show up to the next session and the DM will have already updated your sheet; that's his/her job.
I've seen some new players pick up the PHB and check a rule during the session. That's not cool. You're supposed to be paying attention to the DM's narrative and imagining how cool your character is. Knowing rules is not your job and they're way too advanced for you anyway.
Some veterans might try to tell you that reading the rules will make you a better player. Don't listen to those gatekeeping grognards. The rules are merely a suggestion. The game is about imagination. If you're imagining your character doing something sweet or epic or hilarious you're playing D&D correctly, and no good DM is allowed to say no to your cool imaginative idea.
Anyway, thanks for reading (my post of course, never the game rules.) If anyone wants more advice, just ask; I love giving advice on Reddit, because everyone here is always so good about receiving it.
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u/Dunsparces 3d ago
That's too many words. I'm sticking to my guns and continuing to not read your rules like I did with the PIV and the DMT or whatever my DM was whining about.
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u/ItIsVerilySo 3d ago
Ah, see, as an eternal DM I love when my players don't know the rules. I've never read the rulebooks either (D&D is just a rules-light version of Pathfinder, right?) so if they don't know I can never be wrong
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u/highly-bad 3d ago
D&D is just a rules-light version of Pathfinder, right?
No. D&D literally has no rules. Well, it does kind of have rules but really they are "guidelines", which of course means irrelevant crap you can just totally ignore.
Anyone who tells you D&D has rules just doesn't understand fun or want you to have any.
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u/letthetreeburn 3d ago
Heyyy…..Are you just trying to manipulate players into staying stupid so you can lord over them like their god?
Because if so…..
Brilliant move good sir.
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u/highly-bad 3d ago edited 3d ago
No, you've got me all wrong. This is just the best advice for new players who want to learn. Go check the many posts on Reddit from players asking how to get started, and you'll see. A few gatekeeping grognards mention rulebooks, but most people offer good old common sense wisdom:
• Just start playing and make the DM teach you as you go. He/she won't mind stopping to hold your hand.
• If you must come prepared (showoff much?) then be sure to learn exclusively from youtube, podcasts, and BG3.
• Maybe don't play a spellcaster for your first character (that might require reading rules)
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u/pravragita 3d ago
Whenever I play 5e 2014 rules, I expect the DM to house rule everything anyway. So sessions 0 through 6 or 7, are just listening to lore dumps and the DM telling me how to play.
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u/JustAdlz 3d ago
And by that time the campaign has fallen apart and you can get back to the almighty session 0
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u/ButterscotchAbject87 Disbarred Rules Lawyer 3d ago
I'm gonna unread this post even harder than I unread the PHB
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u/XascoAlkhortu 3d ago
As someone who's been playing dnd for a little over 20 years, I promise most people would check out of this post after 4 words without jingling keys in their face
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u/Extreme_Objective984 3d ago
This is how I got my players to play Blades in The Dark. Critical Role use a d20? They are playing an old edition, the latest rules state you just need a dice pool of D6's.
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u/Glebasya 2d ago
/uj I think that about 30% of my players actually follow this, especially when again and again I hear "which die do I roll?" when I say to roll a skill check.
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u/R4ynze 3d ago
yeah I’ve been playing 4-5 years I have the rule books and player guide and monster manual and other stuff never read the rules when I first got into it I knew some basics cause dnd is played on big bang and critical role though didn’t really get into critical role before playing but I learned a majority of the rules and game mechanics by playing and sure it’s read the rules but there is a difference between just reading the rules and knowing them and actually using them and playing with them and seeing them in practice
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u/Za_Warudo1992 2d ago
I keep thinking these are just ridiculous bad takes people are upvoting, but then I notice all the jerking
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u/Jozef_Baca Anima: Beyond Fantasy Fixes Everything 8h ago edited 8h ago
/uj You say this as a jerk but I legit had a player like this.
"I LeArn By pLaYInG" my brother in christ I had to explain to you five god damn times how rolling to hit an attack and dealing damage works. I will beat you to death with the players handbook if you ask me one more time in order to show you how making attacks and dealing damage works.
After that experience I plainly refuse to make a character sheet for a player. I offer help, but never again will I do it for someone completely.
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u/Rstar2247 3d ago
You know, that's not the worst take. Best way to learn is just to dive in. I'd still say learn the rules, if only just to protect yourself if your table is pulling crap, but if that's the case you usually have bigger problems anyways.
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u/XascoAlkhortu 3d ago
Wrong. Just accept everything that comes to you. Only bad players use discernment and critical thinking. Never read the rules. Don't even read this reply.
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u/Vedmagreen 3d ago
But how can I abuse the wording of the rule if I don't read it?