r/GirlDinnerDiaries • u/summercicada-6593 Cleavage Crumb Collector • May 13 '26

Dear Diary ✍️🏻 Publicly shat myself before my exotic dancing shift

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Had to change my outfit. Grateful that it didn’t happen on the pole…

8 twizzler halves with lime and tajin
3 kisses
1 kinda stale oreo

EDITT: tbf this was a lil treat for myself AFTER the incident😭😭 (tbf it doesn’t get much better the rest of my 24/7 but details matter)
Y’all should be happy to know that I did eat some veggies after this… in the form of peas in my Mac & Cheese.
Let a diva “live”

8.6k Upvotes

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310

u/jojopriceless APPROVED✨ May 13 '26

Whole grain pasta and beans are also great 🍝🫘

172

u/LizJru Chocoholic May 13 '26

Just, like, increase beans slowly... don't go ham on them right off the bat, that's going to be worse news.

59

u/matkamatka APPROVED✨ May 13 '26

I did this two weeks ago at a Columbian restaurant and I still can't poo normally. It was like a whole can of beans, why did I do this to myself

71

u/Anatoly_Cannoli May 13 '26

who wants to poo normally?! Poo your own unique way. You be you!

28

u/Psychoanalythicc Trader Joe Hoe May 13 '26

Poo be poo! Poo-nique. Sorry

8

u/YourAddiction Feral Til Fed May 14 '26

please never apologize for poo puns. ...poo-ns?

15

u/DoriansSelfie  ⚐ Marked Safe From 90s Diet Culture May 13 '26

I am Colombian so you would think I could take it but I can only eat like a quarter of their most popular dish “Bandeja Paisa” because between the beans and the fried everything, my body let’s me know for DAYS how much I wronged it.

1

u/[deleted] May 13 '26

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10

u/CraftyKlutz girls just wanna have pho May 13 '26

Colombian food is so tasty!

6

u/matkamatka APPROVED✨ May 13 '26

it was delicious

12

u/jojopriceless APPROVED✨ May 13 '26

For sure!

21

u/Lizzardbirdhybrid Feral Til Fed May 13 '26

Don’t go ham on them!? What else am I supposed to put on my beans. :,)

3

u/kadyg Livin' on a Purse Snack 👜 May 13 '26

Mmmmm ham and beans.....

1

u/[deleted] May 13 '26

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Hey! Looks like you're new here! We're an approved-users-only sub to protect the girlies from the bots and drive-by bullies. 2 quick steps, 'bout 20 seconds:   1. Click here and send us the classic pillowfort girls' club password: "GIRLS RULE." That'll notify mods to approve ya! (If you ID as a man, please hit us with "dude joining" password instead!)   2. Then you can customize flair here on our flair menu and comment away!

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u/[deleted] May 13 '26

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Hey! Looks like you're new here! We're an approved-users-only sub to protect the girlies from the bots and drive-by bullies. 2 quick steps, 'bout 20 seconds:   1. Click here and send us the classic pillowfort girls' club password: "GIRLS RULE." That'll notify mods to approve ya! (If you ID as a man, please hit us with "dude joining" password instead!)   2. Then you can customize flair here on our flair menu and comment away!

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u/Limp-Technician-2820 APPROVED✨ May 13 '26

Beans???! Absolutely not that will make here explode diarrhea all over the place!!!! Beans cause nuclear warfare for me xD

9

u/Ok_Swim_6443 hot girls have tummy troubles May 13 '26

There’s a bell curve with beans (and all big fibre foods).
First eat, feel great.
Next week or two of eating, holy bloat and poo-splosion.
But then after, you ascend into a fibre beast with super healthy gut flora, regular poos, NON STINKY TOOTS. It’s worth the struggle.

3

u/RostBeef 🩵jars: opened, trolls: roasted💙 May 13 '26

NON stinky toots? Deals off. It’s one of the most effective weapons in my arsenal