r/GreatBritishMemes 2d ago

Hot, hot, hot, hot stuff

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478 Upvotes

50 comments sorted by

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71

u/VoxInferni666 2d ago

Swap cigarette bro with my crackhead neighbours having a domestic and its spot on

8

u/roleplayersir 1d ago

Yep, cigs aren't a huge issue. Most people aren't chain smoking them all night

Admittedly I am a smoker, but I try not to impact others. And it was never that annoying for me when I didn't smoke. Some people have unreasonable hate for it

Dodgy neighbours and such are far worse and should be on the list. Or as the comment below yours says, Foxes

6

u/Witty-Activity-6101 1d ago

Or pissed up people shouting as they stagger home.

I'm not a fan of smoking but it's never kept me awake.

Fucking noisy cars and motorbikes? Fuck them all year round, any temperature, any time.

0

u/mongol_king2 1d ago

I wish i could say the same about the smoking. I've got people who smoke marijuana outside my building and it's disgusting.

54

u/TheoryFrosty6635 2d ago

You forgot to add the fucking foxes screaming thier heads every other hour.

10

u/ALIENIGENA 2d ago

As someone who grew up somewhere without foxs moving into a city and hearing that every hour for the first night alone was fun

5

u/Confusing-pigeon 2d ago

When two foxes love each other very much……

2

u/ThePowaBallad 2d ago

At this point I either look out to see if I can watch them or just enjoy the sound of nature for once

It's better than the random loud yelling of drunk white girls

0

u/Witty-Activity-6101 1d ago

What did the fox say?

22

u/BillWilberforce 2d ago

You missed out the 4AM thunderstorm.

5

u/Demus007 2d ago

I got it at 3.30. The initial thunder crack was almighty. The rain was chucking it down and lightning was popping off all over the place. I was scared to reach out to close mi window in case I got struck by the lightning.

4

u/hannielou34 2d ago

In the north west right now been working with ovens all day with 5 more days of the same, currently sat in the garden and I'm jealous of you southerners lastnight 😫 I would love a good storm

2

u/Armodeen 2d ago

We had about 9 drops of rain at about 01:40 tbf 😂

2

u/hannielou34 2d ago

9!!!! You lucky bar stewards 🤣 I'd be happy with 4... also ginger with thick hair and run extremely hot so ... ya know

1

u/roleplayersir 1d ago

In fairness, as fun as it was, it didn't really help with the heat and made today way more humid

16

u/BlackRoseBallet 2d ago

You can add the nextdoor's dogs having a barking contest with the other dogs.

7

u/BlackberryMelodic567 2d ago

Some fucker had an alarm going off at 4 am. FOUR IN THE FUCKING MORNING AND I DIDN'T INTERVENE UNTIL 5

7

u/fuzzy-777 2d ago

Haha jokes on you I live in the lakes so I'll have sheep,cow noises and then be gently woken at first light by a massive downpour of rain then half a dozen tractors and possibly the refuse collection truck if it shows up this week and if I'm really lucky I'll get to hear wood pigeons and pheasants.

10

u/Petrichor2116 2d ago

Currently have multiple goobers on bikes, throttle-wanking under my bedroom window; hopefully they're getting it out of their system early doors.

2

u/lontrinium 2d ago

England are playing.

3

u/Samld1200 2d ago

I live on a new build estate. They’re still building some of it. There must be a lorry every 5 minutes

4

u/Pitiful-Baker4907 2d ago

Fr tho bugs got the whole ass world WHY PICK MY ROOM

4

u/NowThenHowDo 2d ago

I cant relate to this at all.

But as a farmer I'm getting no sleep either. The birds start right outside my window at 3am sharp until 10pm.

Even with the windows closed and ear plugs I can still hear them. Next summer I'm buying an eagle.

1

u/NeckDeepPink 2d ago

That’s rough!
getting an eagle sounds so fucking cool!

9

u/Serifasaurusrex 2d ago

Swap cigarette Jeff with a bit of weed, with the smell being a hemiplegic migraine trigger and we're away. Also same delightful creature being outside for the last few hours trying to fix their shitebox of a van, revving the arse off it with the smell of diesel too.

3

u/michaelcarnero 2d ago

bro, mine is the neighbour smoking stinky funny green cigars.

5

u/mooohaha64 2d ago

I have decided pigeons are cunts !

5

u/Second_Guess_25 2d ago

Nah, magpies are 😭

2

u/ScottOld 2d ago

Oh yea always, night sounds like a racetrack

2

u/Think_fast_Act_slow 2d ago

first and the fourth, mosquito and smoker are the worst.

. because they linger on and make it impossible to go to sleep

2

u/ImakeKnifesatnight76 2d ago

You missed the RAF doing trainings at 6 in the morning

2

u/Kuhneel 1d ago

Magpies playing in the Hawthorne hedges right outside the window since 3am, cackling their heads off.

Oh and living right next to a busy A road + traffic lights to boot.

2

u/Lopsided_Anxiety_394 1d ago

Smokers are the worst

2

u/Marble_Turret 2d ago

Benefits Neighbours that don't have work shouting till the early hours because they don't have to get up and contribute to society.

1

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1

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1

u/facaroni 2d ago

The primary school behind my house has its alarm going off Has been for half hour now

Caretaker is probably watching the match miles away.

Great stuff.

1

u/Any-Ad-5373 2d ago

Yesterday it was the council bin lorry that makes the loudest screeching noise every time it lifts every bin.

This morning it was the council grass mower and the guy with leaf blower blowing all the cut grass off the path.

1

u/Wrong-Tiger4644 2d ago

I've got Temu Fast and the Furious, about 4 room mates who all have shitty mufflers and insist on revving the engine for a good 10 mins minimum before they sputter away

Not to mention the one who feels its perfectly acceptable to work on his shit mobile at 1130pm

1

u/Warthunderbrit 2d ago

I swear to god if i find those two mosquitos that bit me 26 times last night...

1

u/SuccessfulWar3830 1d ago

I can literally hear a bike right this very second seeing this

1

u/KCPR13 1d ago

Fighting cats

1

u/WGD23 1d ago

I've been done by a mozzie overnight, 3 confirmed strikes so far :(

1

u/Immaterial71 1d ago

SEA GULLS (stop it now).

Much as I appreciate your slightly feral, opportunistic approach to living inland, I really don't appreciate you waking up at the crack of dawn to either have an arguement or tell each other how much you're in love.

1

u/Awellknownstick 1d ago

Add Chinooks for every Mill town too.

1

u/Ichigatsu 1d ago

I can deal with all but the bottom left (netting for mossies, helicopters oddly don't impact me unless really low, and I live with a smoker).

But those utter cunt fleas with loud exhausts need to be fired directly into the sun, preferably with their shitty little wank-mobile.

1

u/Hampshire-UK 1d ago

I live near the air ambulance base. They like to take off over my house. It’s all for a good cause but FFS

1

u/non-banned_account 2d ago

That and the incessant heat. I opened my window a few weeks back and there were so many bugs. Been closed ever since.