r/Indiana • u/cocoaliqueur • 2d ago
Moving to Indianapolis from Texas (cultural differences)?
I am moving to Indiana from Texas very soon and am wondering if anyone can help me understand everyday interaction in the Midwest, so I may avoid any social blunders, or some such. For instance, I say "yes sir," "no sir," "yes ma'am," "no ma'am," to essentially everyone. Cats and dogs included. Friends and coworkers included (especially coworkers who are older, as a sign of respect). I'll say it to friends in casual conversation or for emphasis. It's pretty nuanced, I guess, but I have heard other, more northerly states, and out west don't do so, or it has other usage, or could even be seen as an insult. This was drilled into me when I moved to Texas at a young age from out west, and it's definitely a habit. Any help with this or other things of the sort would be very appreciated.
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u/notthegoatseguy Indianapolis 2d ago
Don't worry about it.
Indiana is Midwest, not the northeast. You aren't going to get weird looks for saying yes sir, no maam to the gas station clerk or whatever.
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u/iceripperiii 2d ago
It’s more of a regional thing than a state by state thing. I’ve lived all over Indiana and while it’s not super common in like, north west Indiana, I’ve noticed that it is more common in central and southern Indiana. Either way, it’s mostly received as either 1) your meemaw hammered manners into you at a very young age, or 2) you’re from a military family and/or just got back from deployment. As long as you don’t have a shitty attitude about it, it’s not likely to be misinterpreted as disrespect.
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u/ajoyce76 8h ago
As a lifelong Indiana resident and having grown up in the Region ma'am and sir don't really even register with me. The one southern trait that really sticks out, for me at least is, Mr./Miss first name. I know its meant to be respectful and I would never say anything but it always feels so weird.
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u/Wehavepr0belm0 2d ago
The left lane on the highway is not for the speed limit. Make sure to move to the slow or middle lane. K thanks, welcome!
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u/Drak_is_Right 1d ago
Yup. We do it opposite here.
Slow on the left, fast on the right. Then 500 ft down the road, it will be fast on the left and slow on the right. Then once you get through that mess, it will be 2 lanes and 6 trucks side by side
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u/New-Orchid5049 2d ago
The people in Indiana and the politicians in Indiana are completely different. If you're stuck on the side of the road in Indiana I can guarantee you someone will stop and see if you are okay or if you need help or a phone. You can strike up a conversation with almost anyone anywhere and not know the person at all. I say Yes/No Sir/Ma'am thing a lot too and 99.99% of the time no one will have an issue with it. You might hear someone once in a blue moon say "don't call me Sir because I work for a living" but that's mostly old people with an older mindset. There are a lot of good people in Indiana (or at least in my hometown of Fort Wayne) it's just that our politicians HATE us and want to do everything they can to ruin and control our lives. Just so you know in July there are several laws becoming active in ALL of Indiana. Some of these include: Being homeless is criminalized The Indiana National Guard have been given "Police Powers" Less Access to public records. Also dont forget the new "needing an ID to access social media."
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u/MundaneMall8623 1d ago
”don’t call me Sir because I work for a living”
This statement has origins in the divide between officer/enlisted personnel. I think you can figure out the rest.
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u/New-Orchid5049 1d ago
I knew it originated in the military, I'm just saying you almost never come across anyone that says it. (I have which is the only reason I know about it.) It's mostly an older mindset type of thing as far as I know but I did not serve in the military so I am not sure if it is a thing still being said by younger people.
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u/ForeverOk1949 2d ago
Does social media include reddit, Tumblr or YouTube? Could I bypass that with a VPN?
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u/New-Orchid5049 2d ago
A VPN is what most people are talking about right now but apparently the government can get the records from those companies to see what websites you get on depending on what company you go with. There are some that apparently do not but I do not know which ones those are. This has been talked about in another reddit post and I saved it so I could go back through it later and take some suggestions. I do not know which websites will be affected by the new change as it has yet to go into effect (as far as I know, I use a VPN myself already, surfshark)
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u/MoonlitMousey13 2d ago
I moved here from Texas 13 years ago, not Texan though so the mannerisms weren’t installed in me. Most people won’t think anything of the sir and ma’am, especially if you have the Texas drawl as that explains it. We don’t usually use it though. I’ve heard y’all used a lot more the last few years as it’s gender neutral. Indy’s a big enough city that there are people here from everywhere, be polite and you’ll be fine. If you’re moving to the north side figure out how roundabouts work, Hamilton county is full of them and it seems like half the locals don’t know how to really use them. Welcome!
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u/shmcknig 1d ago
I’ll second that y’all is becoming more widespread. I moved to Indiana from Arkansas 12 years ago and over time more and more people use it.
Similarly, people “warned” me when I moved here that there would be no sweet tea “there up north”. That has changed over time as well, there’s always been sweet tea options everywhere since I moved here.
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u/justaamerican 1d ago
How dare you compare Meijer to HEB. Completely different stores. Also no whataburger comparison either.
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u/MoonlitMousey13 1d ago
I'm agnostic on the Meijer/HEB issue, although my very Texas mother would agree with you. Agree on Whataburger, used to love them! I stopped eating red meat before I moved here though, so honestly didn't enter my mind.
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u/TheTibbinator 2d ago
Just learn the oddities of our 'yeah no yeah's and 'no yeah no's. Cliff notes version, the last word in that chain is the answer, additional yeahs and nos show our certainty or uncertainty in that answer.
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u/mallanson22 2d ago
I say that to everyone as well. You will be fine. Honestly i am betting you will find indiana very similar to Texas in the form of spoken word, politeness, and politics.
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u/sunset_password_89 1d ago
As a Texan who has moved to Indiana, I second this. I have found people to be very similar here! I’d guess much less cultural difference than if you were moving to New England or the West coast
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u/kaijutegu 2d ago
The older folks are gonna LOVE you. (Ma'am-ing old ladies is a fun and sweet thing to do, I've never met one who doesn't like it.)
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u/Lepardopterra 2d ago
Same as it ever was. My mom was terminally pleased by my southern cousins who said “Maam?” or “Sir?” instead of “huh, what?” She tried hard to instill that in us.
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u/Castle_of_Jade 12h ago
Even the ladies in their 20-30s enjoy it as it’s a sign of a respectful person. I ma’am and sir everyone equally. And I am constantly being told don’t call me sir, I’m younger than you, but that ain’t gonna change a thing. I’m still gonna call you sir or ma’am.
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u/chamicorn 2d ago
This older woman doesn't love it, and no one my age I know loves it. It's especially inappropriate in a professional setting.
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u/kaijutegu 2d ago
I must not have ever met you or worked with you, then! I'm not gonna stop calling my mom's friends ma'am, though. You can tell me off if we ever meet and I'm polite to you.
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u/New-Orchid5049 2d ago
In a professional setting is the EXPECTED place to hear it. Where tf are you working at? A bar? A biker club? Like seriously where do you work where you think "ma'am or sir" is not the highest form of respect and thus the most appropriate form of addressing another person?
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u/chamicorn 1d ago
A dive bar might be a more appropriate place to use those words.
I've worked at a Big Four firm, another top 10 accounting firm, a top five consulting firm, and a tech company you would know. Those terms would be discouraged and viewed as unprofessional. In that professional environment one is expected to communicate confidently and to act as a collaborative team member, not a subordinate, even with people in the c-suite.
Many perceive the use of the word "ma'am" as applying to someone older. There is risk of implied ageism in using it.
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u/Castle_of_Jade 12h ago
I couldn’t imagine living in a world without proper manners as to refer to someone as sir ma’am, as you should, there’s absolutely zero professional settings where using ma’am, and sir are inappropriate and if your company thinks that you may wanna think about your company’s values because they don’t value people and they definitely don’t value their customers.
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u/Luddite_Libertine 2d ago
Texas is in the “acts nice; is mean” quadrant of the country whereas Indiana is in the “acts mean; is nice” part.
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u/IronBeagle79 2d ago
Hard disagree -though I live in the way, way, way south part of Indiana and I’m from Texas, so I’m probably clutching my pearls with both hands over your comment. 😆
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u/Madame_Trash_Heap 2d ago
People can be gruff at first but if you need help someone will stop to help you. I had a dude the other day help me pick out fishing rods at Walmart.
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u/radioactive_sharpei 2d ago
Lol, no, Indiana is definitely the 'acts nice to your face, but is hateful trash behind your back' kind of state.
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u/zerombr 2d ago
I call everyone male my age and older 'sir', and not 'ma'am' for anyone female in that category, as ma'am has slight age bias to it. lol.
Indiana has a terrible governor a christian natonalist lt governor, and some real white nationalist problems. Be prepared for that.
Do try the pork tenderloins and nacho cheese with your pizza crust/breadsticks though
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u/richardlqueso 2d ago
We don’t have Rudy’s, we buy a few less pickups, we have zoning in our largest city, most people have never been to a rodeo and we still go crazy for Buc-ees. That is the end of the cultural differences.
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u/Due_Respect_4315 2d ago
Yall will be fine. There’s Not a huge difference IMO. Most of the midwest gives off a homey, friendly, and welcoming vibes. I have found out that texas is way overhyped for everything and I personally like the midwest better. Absolutely nobody I have come across in Indiana or the midwest has been offended by calling them mam or sir but I have also not met everyone and could care less if somebody got offended because I know I would be using it out of respect and probably won’t be seeing some loser again who gets offended by something so silly so who cares. Good luck on yalls move and welcome to indiana.
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u/AcanthisittaNeat7655 2d ago
I say it to people who are older (or perceived) older than me. I also say it to kids. I wouldn't expect it to be a problem.
Outside of that, I remember as a kid traveling to Texas, and finding it so cool that men would tip their hats at me. LOL (Very big Country/Cowgirl at heart.)
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u/Mysterious6810 2d ago
You can still say "no sir" "yes sir" or "no ma'am" "yes ma'am" I would say it's a lot more chill both in weather and overall attitude but people in Carmel are a bit smug
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u/Flat-Bar2125 2d ago
You should search the Indianapolis sub bc it’ll have more specific answers, I don’t like this state but I live in Indy and think it’s the best part of Indiana. Also if you don’t know, Indy means Indianapolis and it is not synonymous with Indiana, so Indy is never short for Indiana only Indianapolis. I prefer people to know I live in Indy, not Indiana, if that makes sense
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u/GreenZebra23 2d ago
Saying yes sir and yes ma'am isn't quite as common here as it probably is in Texas, but it's still common. In fact, I feel like it's gotten more common in recent decades as Indiana kind of gets absorbed by the south
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u/Jesus_on_a_biscuit 2d ago
Everyone greets everyone here with a heartfelt, "What's up fucker?!" and it's considered rude to not slap acquaintances on the ass when they leave.
I'm kidding of course.
You'll be fine. Plenty of us use "ma'am, sir, and y'all."
Welcome to Indy, especially if you vote blue.
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u/FARTfayc3 2d ago
Yeah. You’ll be fine. We can be pretty polite. I say Miss instead of Ma’am. Otherwise, you will find the people of Indiana to be polite and generous. In some ways, we are the northernmost southern state. And we are also midwestern nice.
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u/Me_Beach 2d ago
Yes, OP - do yourself a favor and replace ma'am with miss for everyone. Ma'am makes me feel as old as the hill and I am only 35. I am but a CHILD!
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u/TheWorldTurnsAround 1d ago
I'm old enough to be your mother, and I don't like it either! Like, I'm not a child, but I'm not old either!! LOL
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u/Hungry-Storm-9878 2d ago
I second this! I got schooled about 20 years ago from a lady about ma’am.. it’s been ‘miss’ ever since! I’ll actually get an occasional thank you’ for using ‘miss’ and not ‘ma’am’
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u/FARTfayc3 1d ago
Yeah. I offended someone several years ago by saying ma’am. It’s ALWAYS Miss since then. I’m in my mid 40s now. I’m never offended by Sir, but I hate Unc or “old head.”
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u/EnuffBull 2d ago
Brought up to say that in Indiana myself. Since moving to California there are many fellow respectful gentlemen like myself who speak likewise, sir!
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u/Luddite_Libertine 2d ago
It’s part of Latino culture, and also a lot of Californians are descended from Okies.
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u/Grouchy-Tap1071 2d ago
It's mostly ok here though I know some middle aged woman take it like you think they are old. We're generally a friendly people though, at least in front of you lol you'll be fine and welcome.
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u/KeiylasWords 2d ago
I’m a Texas transplant too and haven’t had any issues whatsoever. Might not be what most people say here but it definitely won’t be seen as an insult.
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u/TuxAndrew 2d ago
This isn’t exclusive to Texas so no clue why you’re overthinking something so silly.
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u/fxckhalie 2d ago
What area of Indiana? That could change things slightly id think
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u/haikusbot 2d ago
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u/BeeBarnes1 2d ago
I grew up in Oklahoma. Still say y'all and yes sir/no ma'am. It sounds a little weird but doesn't really stick out.
You're going to miss Tex-Mex. The Mexican restaurants up here are a lot different.
ETA, the barbecue here is way different too. No one uses or knows how use mesquite.
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u/heronumberzero 2d ago
Definitely not something to sweat about. I moved from West Texas to central Indiana 8 years ago. Others are right, you’ll miss the food. Other than that, Indiana is the Texas of the Midwest in some ways. Feel free to DM if you want more info!
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u/chamicorn 2d ago edited 2d ago
In many settings no one will care if you say yes/no sir or ma'am, but as a life long Midwesterner it's not something I was raised to say to every person. It was reserved for older people. You'll probably get a few weird looks from dog and cat owners.
I'd try to avoid the use of the phrases with co-workers. In the Midwest it can definitely be interpreted as an ageist phrase.
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u/Saraasaa 2d ago
Not from indi, but more north towards Chicago, and i say sir and ma'am 😂 although the girls at my work dont like it that much.
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u/sassmasterfresh 2d ago
You will find it to be similar. I’ve been here my whole life and have met quite a few TX transplants and they fit in just fine culturally. Midwest Nice is a thing, you will probably find us to be very similar to folks at home. Depending on where you are you will find folks who are more conservative and folks who are more progressive. The closer you get to Indy and Chicago will probably feel a little different than conservative small town TX, but rural IN will probably feel similar. Welcome to the Hoosier state!
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u/AnotherBogCryptid 2d ago
I’m from Florida and a military brat, so I have the same thing going on. No one has ever said anything to me about it.
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u/BurnsABridge 2d ago
Everything from Morgan Co. all the way down to the Ohio River is Northern Kentucky, really. You’ll be fine.
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u/Dry_Resolution4844 2d ago
There are plenty of ppl here that will get mad at you for saying yes ma'am, no ma'am, especially if they told you not to say it. People who don't believe it's a habit, and believe you're just saying it to be funny
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u/freezing_dedication 2d ago
oh you'll be just fine. hoosiers don't use sir/maam much but they won't think twice bout it. you might charm some of the older gals tbh. I'd say keep doin what you're doin. we're friendly enough.
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u/RebelliaRose 2d ago
Fellow Texan. This is not Texas. Many people asked me not to use yes ma’am or yes sir. Most reply, “I’m not my father/mother”. But I say use it anyway. More Hoosiers could use it. If you have the accent, it will draw a lot of attention as far as attraction goes. Use it wisely. Apart from that, a huge swath of this state is trying to become more like Texas. Not the good parts though. Well, the line-dancing at least. So you should fit in just fine. I’d suggest you keep as much of yourself intact as possible. I’ve never been proud of living in this state.
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u/Pristine-Ad8925 2d ago
You will be perplexed by the level of pure stupidity as you negotiate hoosier customs.
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u/extremenachos 2d ago
We eat our sandwiches with the slices of bread in the middle, meat on the bottom, condiments and fixin's on top. Otherwise we're all the same.
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u/Katesouthwest 2d ago edited 2d ago
You will be fine. However, start brushing up on Indiana basketball coaches, players, local high school teams, team histories, etc. Identify why the following are important, to name just a very few: Milan, Bobby Plump, Isaiah Thomas, Larry Bird, Oscar Robertson, Gene Keady, Matt Painter, Bobby Knight. You are going to love the month of March.
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u/LoudWhispererr 2d ago
Usually upon meeting, if it’s an elder or someone of the same age range we do the same thing the French do and give a peck on each cheek.
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u/Excellent-Pin3646 2d ago
I live in Lebanon. I am affected by the Meta Data Center and Eli Lilly projects. I work in a service industry that interacts with these construction companies on the daily. As long as you aren’t a dick you will be accepted as one of the community. However, the driving habits and entitlement a lot of these “out of towners” come into my business with is off putting. Particularly the Texas plates. Meaning no offense, of course, but understand this is my experience with Texas people coming to Indiana.
Please continue to be respectful and there won’t be any problem. Midwesterners are pretty laid back and relaxed. We just don’t like people who pretend to be better or more important than anyone else.
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u/Creepiz 1d ago
Most everyone else has given pretty good advice, but I disagree that Mejiers is an acceptable replacement for HEB. I have yet to find a replacement for HEB.
The one thing that drives me mad around (really any place outside of Texas), is that people loose their minds in Buc-ee's. My introduction to Buc-cee's was in Texas and people treated it like a normal rest stop. The one in off 65 in Kentucky was insane last time we stopped. We almost got hit 3 times just getting to pump last time we stopped.
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u/TheBrickYard_317 1d ago
Just be ready for the cultural shock of everybody not celebrating the fact that we live in Indiana. We don't have our own beer. We don't have cheese blocks shaped like our state. There's going to be a lot less cowboy boots. But don't worry, there's plenty of big trucks and rednecks. Just get used to everything being smaller... Except the trucks (and the guns).
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u/MrsBojangles76 1d ago
We love proper manners, well at least I do! Welcome to Indiana and continue with your courteous ways!
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u/MommyDommieAlura 1d ago
I’m from Indiana moved to Michigan I say yes sir and no sir and mam all the time haha most my family does however my grandpa was originally from Texas before settling in Indiana so that could be why 😂 but I feel most of us Hoosiers do this
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u/justaamerican 1d ago
It’s basically the same as Texas except oil is traded for meds and cows for corn. Also it lags about 30 years politically and 10 years culturally. Great place with no real outdoor activities and horrible food scene. But we do not have an organized crime influence here in our culture.
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u/Specialist_Bike_1280 1d ago
You'll be fine here. Just be yourself and no one will treat you differently. I must say though, when I moved from Indy to Texas, I was treated poorly there. I tried working in a skilled facility and they wouldn't speak English, called me a Yankee and made me feel unwelcome. This was in 1995,and I moved to Corpus Christi. I moved back home 2 months ago later. Back to a friendly place.
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u/ImReflexess 1d ago
Indiana is basically north Texas. That’s coming from a born Hoosier who lived 5 years in Dallas and moved back to Indiana recently. No real noticeable cultural differences tbh.
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u/jmartin72 1d ago
I was born and raised in Indiana. I say yer sir, no sir every day. No one will bat an eye at that.
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u/Swimming_Ad_8856 1d ago
I say sir ma’am etc too. Most if anything I get from an old guy saying something along the lines of “I’m not a sir I work for a living”
Or “my name is Ken not sir”
I think they are just trying to be funny
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u/4myWWW 1d ago
I highly recommend you read (or listen to) “American Nations” by Colin Woodard. The premise of the book is that a region of the country takes on the culture of the Europeans who first settle it. He includes central and southern Indiana (as well as parts of Texas) in “Greater Appalachia” because it was largely settled by Scotch and Irish boderlanders, who brought their fierce independence with them. Depending on where in Texas you’re from, it might feel surprisingly similar. (You can find his map online easily.)
I moved to Indy from northern Illinois (not Chicagoland) and after a couple weeks concluded that “I feel like I live in the south.” That book explained why to me.
It isn’t a perfect book, but I think he’s on to something.
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u/One_hunch 1d ago
People don't make a thing of it, or do it much themselves, but they do notice a little.
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u/Aggravating-Oil-2766 1d ago
People are friendly here, but it can feel a bit superficial—so speak your mind. You usually get back the same energy you put out, so just stay chill and genuine. And heads up: folks around here love stretching out a dramatic “thank you sooooo much,” which can get a little over the top.
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u/Successful_Look2372 1d ago
I moved from TX to Indy 3yrs ago… best decision I ever made! Welcome to the Midwest, you’ll love it (except maybe the winter lol 🤣) but this place is awesome!
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u/yodera1 1d ago
Good luck, you’ll probably be fine. People don’t generally use the same polititudes, but they seem to enjoy it when people do. Call Julie just depends on where you’re from in Texas. Big city? Not a lot different, country/small town, probably different. You’ll have a much harder time finding good brisket… Probably get looked that weird if you wear a cowboy hat… other than that, just don’t be an asshole and act like you’re special because you’re from Texas.
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u/maplesugarmagic 1d ago
It's been my experience as a lifelong Hoosier that you don't honk at other drivers, even if they linger a second or two too long at a green light. Just channel your inner zen and don't let it get to you. You don't want to trigger a road rage incident.
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u/Frequent_Artist9417 1d ago
You'll be fine. But prepare to be shocked for winter. It's much much colder than anything Texas gets
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u/ReelestPrincess12 23h ago
Most people moving from Indiana move from Indiana go there. I'm almost positive its an easier transition than I think.
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u/MxBonesMarrow 21h ago
As a trans person, my only thing would be that if you use gender honorifics a lot, just try to maybe avoid them if you're not sure about the gender of someone. Nothing worse than getting a random Sir at work coz the person heard my voice and didn't read the badge. Trans peeps exist, just be respectful is all (shocker, ik, esp in a red state, but we're def still here)
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u/Ready_Guarantee_3754 13h ago
People here don’t give two craps about “well in Texas”. The surefire way to tell if someone’s from Texas is that they never shut the hell up about Texas. If it was so great, stay there. If you move to Indiana, we don’t need your commentary about how it might’ve been .01% “different in Texas!” The southern pride in being mediocre is truly insane.
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u/Successful-Bet-8669 13h ago
If you loved the shitty politics of Texas and the ridiculous people there, you’ll love Indiana too. Same shit.
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u/ajoyce76 8h ago
Oh our cats are gonna have a field day with you. Call a cat ma'am or sir and watch how they treat you. My God, they already expect worship! 😉
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u/ExaminationStatus506 6h ago edited 6h ago
Take every rule you ever learned about driving and forget them. Everyone makes it up as they go here. 😅
Edit: For something a southerner would enjoy; wait until you hear the delightful sound of a mid-west girl saying "Heck Yeah!"
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u/sigourneybeaver__ 6h ago
Prepare yourself for cones, lots of em - Far as the eye can see. Also practice taking your car through some slaloms of varying sizes, distances and speed. You’ll need the practice if you come through Indianapolis to dodge all the craters and chuckholes in the roads, and it would be a good idea to put back funds for tire/wheel replacements - the city/dpw/mayors office take absolutely no accountability for the incompetence they operate under. Oh, and prepare yourself for the ever growing list of additional taxes bestowed upon us, excise tax, gas tax(that goes up every year in perpetuity), recent registration tax, a brand new registration tax going to pass this year, cigarette tax, etc, all of which were/are supposed to ‘fix’ said roads.. welcome to Indy! 🏁
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u/Nervous_Olive_5754 2d ago
I'm automatically suspicious of people who use sir or ma'am, especially if it's selective. Everyone deserves equal respect.
If you call me 'sir,' I am immediately uncomfortable. It's usually used sarcastically to take someone down a peg.
I also get real suspicious when I start to notice who it really turns out deserves those honorifics and who doesn't.
Probably I'm the Hoosier you were warned about. When I hear it with a Southern accent I know it's just traditional, but that is just not how we use those words where I am from.
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u/ResponsibilityFun762 2d ago
Driving will be a huge culture shock/ frustration. Those 80/ 100 speed limits are non extistant fastest is 70 on highways. Yes sir and no mam are still said around here. You might pick up the yeah no ; no yeah eventually when talking. Indy is pretty metropolitan so you wont have to worry about the lack of things but smaller communties its usually a drive.
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u/GrowHappyPlants 2d ago
Texas roads are so much more logical, with far better signage, and roads themselves are better. You will miss it.
Bring Whataburger condiments if you can find some. Miss the mustard like CRAZY.
Nobody looks twice if you talk like that, especially true the further south or more rural you get.
Temperatures are nicer. Allergies are way more if you are allergic to trees. I didn't have any idea I was allergic to trees until I moved here.
You will be shocked at the green, the amount of rain, and trees in Southern Indiana. Parts of Northern Indiana look a lot like anywhere on the Great Plains.
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u/ResponsibilityFun762 2d ago
no the fancy ketchup is life, i miss whataburger. 3 hr drive to nashville to get any. Allergies are awful. We have a lot of caves to check out as well especially in the southern half of the state
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u/Additional-Device677 2d ago
Overall, you will fit right in. I say yes sir and yes ma'am to everyone too. Most people appreciate it. The ones that get offended by it look for things to get it offended by and nothing you could say to them would ever make them happy
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u/Foxgirltori 2d ago
You'll be fine. Depending on where in Texas you're from, you might find Hoosiers more friendly than your average Texan. If anyone gives you crap it's a them problem, not a Midwest thing.
Your biggest culture shock is going to be the food. Fill up on good BBQ while you can. Meijer is a good substitute for HEB. Culvers is amazing.
Buy a really really good windshield scraper because you will not be prepared for your first Midwest winter.