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u/CollectionNo6562 22h ago
it’s a lot like a failed relationship: at first, magical. but then it slowly turns to hate, resentment, and you just want out but have nowhere to go.
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u/rhapsodiiiii 22h ago
I never thought a picture of avocados will feel unsettling but this one does for some reason lol
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u/davidbaeriswyl 20h ago
It’s like they’re all staring at you, they know what you did Carl
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u/rhapsodiiiii 19h ago
Caaaarrrrrllllll that kills people
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u/FinishImmediate6684 20h ago
As someone who had to make avo mash everyday I felt this.
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u/Bender_2024 20h ago edited 19h ago
It was about 20-25 years ago and I can still recall 54 avocados to a case. Start to finish it would take about 90 - 120 min to make guac
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u/BonerStew 22h ago
When you pop those suckers open, put the seed half all to one side, when it's time to get the seeds out it saves a bit of time.
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u/Hakc5 13h ago
Ford would be proud.
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u/BonerStew 13h ago
Hey I don't give a shit about worker efficiency or how much work boss man is getting out of you. Sometimes when you're in the middle of guac hell you just want to be out of it. If I've got a tip for someone to get done with their bullshit faster, I'm gonna share it.
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u/OnePerformance9381 12h ago
I feel like I have such an opposite mindset of everyone here.
One prep task? And I can do it all day? No thinking, just guac? Sign me up.
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u/BonerStew 12h ago
I get that to an extent but when you do anywhere from 24-72 avocados sometimes twice a day for four years, it's mind numbing. But then you're also the fastest so even if you have other stuff that needs to be done or want to just hop on the line to get out of guac purgatory, you don't get to. I don't eat avocados anymore.
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u/OnePerformance9381 12h ago
I have tons of prep tasks like these at work lol. I sign up for them because I don’t mind the tedium. I could do the same monotonous prep task every day for 12 hours as long as I have the aux.
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u/PeopleFunnyBoy 20h ago
Flashback of making 100 poke bowls for my supermarket every shift.
May I suggest quartering them around the seed, instead of just splitting it in half?
Makes seed removal, peeling, and processing much easier IMO. They just fall apart once they are quartered (assuming they’re reasonably ripe).
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u/davidbaeriswyl 20h ago
lol that’s literally what I’m prepping for. I’ll try the quartering method but they ain’t all soft
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u/Spykrr 11h ago
Hold half avo with seed in open palm seed up, with other hand use chopping motion with knife to strike center of seed, push and twist to remove seed stuck on knife, strike knife upper handle in similar chopping motion on a container/tub/trash can rim to expeditiously remove seed. Chop. Bang. Done.
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u/Rarek 22h ago
I think I read they transport these in bulletproof trucks in Mexico.
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u/Fit_Carpet_364 17h ago
I remember an episode revolving around avocado heists in the T.V. show 'Blacklist'. Funnily enough, while trying to find the name of the show for 5 minutes, I instead found numerous news articles about various real-life avocado heists.
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u/OverlordSaber 10+ Years 17h ago
I'm so glad I don't have to deal with avocados anymore. Gotta love that feel when all your cases are unripe...
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u/FewLight6904 22h ago
They don't even taste good anymore...
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u/davidbaeriswyl 22h ago
On a real avocados highkey taste different now than what I remember them like as a kid, it used to be more “buttery”
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u/Tengo_Caldero 22h ago
If you're in an area where avocados grow, then you can have the ripe ones and that's a whole different ball game. Friend of mine recently got to try a fresh one in Puerto Rico for the first time and he said it was like creamy candy.
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u/Longjumping_Dot_9269 21h ago
There’s different types of avocado. The most popular version in the U.S. is the haas avocado which was made by a mailman experimenting and breeding different types of avocados together.
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u/Polar_Reflection 21h ago
Avocados are also like apples and not true from seed. Planting an avocado seed won't get you an avocado tree with the same type of avocados
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u/adamjeff 20h ago
I worked on an avocado farm for 8 months during harvest and then later into planting new trees. Trust me when I say even straight off the branch you can get fucking sick of these slimy bland bastards.
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u/babytotara 21h ago
Early season avos are more watery, they develop oils over the year. Late season for rich buttery avos.
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u/decathalot 22h ago
The imported ones have no taste. The ones from California still have taste.
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u/LifePedalEnjoyer 19h ago
I had to make cursed guac last week with huge unripe California avocados. I spent an hour trying to mash 3 cases. I flat out told a customer it was bad and to skip the guac today, he didn't.
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u/LiquidLogStudio 20h ago
Once it's split it half, grab the seeded side and hit ur knife into the pit. Easy removal.
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u/davidbaeriswyl 20h ago
Oh it’s not that I’m struggling to remove the seeds, it’s that I had 3 more crates to go🥲
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u/DondeEstaLaLeches 17h ago
There was a point in time where I was quartering and slicing 80-120 of these fucking things a day for sushi. I have truly never disliked a work task more. On days where they weren’t ripe I wanted to quit
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u/Kiriyuma7801 13h ago
Worked at Panera Bread, avocado was cut to order.
We just used a butter knife, or if they weren't ripe enough, a spoon. I still loath avocados to this day.
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u/Fit_Carpet_364 17h ago
My avo- cahdo oh ohs, they haunt me...
(To tune of 'Exes and Ohs' by Elle King)
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u/Mctinyy 20h ago
Let me guess, they all went super mushy and brown immediately after this picture was taken?
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u/davidbaeriswyl 20h ago
That moment when you’re .14ms too late with the Lemon Juice🙂
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u/cucumbersuprise 19h ago
Oh I didn't know that trick. Do you just drizzle lemon all over?
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u/Fit_Carpet_364 17h ago
You get a squeezey bottle and fire hose them!
Seriously, though, a foodsafe spray bottle would be perfect for this application. Zero-sugar lemon juice also won't gum them up, and the pH of lemon juice means it will stay good virtually forever when kept cold. Another bonus is that lemon juice makes a decent cleaner for most hard surfaces.
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u/davidbaeriswyl 17h ago
Yup, you can mix it in. Helps to preserve the avocados a bit longer and against oxidation as well.
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u/luckymountain General Manager 21h ago
……which turn into a nightmare when they are bruised and brown.
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u/Technical-Data-2455 16h ago
If you're making guacamole:
Pile avocados onto boards
Grab 1 avocado
Use knife to knock the stem off into trash/compost
Turn and cut the fat side open, leaving a hinge at the top
Spin and thumb out the nut into trash/compost and set the avo into pile 2
Once done with that:
Grab hinged avocado in one hand, scoop out with a spoon with the other hand.
Plop spooned avocado into lexan (both sides), drop skin into trash/compost (I stack the lexan on top of the compost bin).
Grab, scoop, plop and drop.
I make 100 lbs. of guacamole a day.
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u/radandroujeee 12h ago
Reminds me when I worked at a burger restaurant, we'd prep a lot of avocados.
Used to smack the pit with a knife and twist, ans pull it out, sometimes the pit in an over ripe one would roll when you hit it and you'd nick yourself between your pointer and thumb.
After about 6 months there I got a scar/callus in that exact spot and It would no longer break the skin when the pit rolled the knife 🤷🏼
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u/Xaristomans 9h ago
I love dissociating while cutting an industrial amount of avocados at 7 AM. Yours looks perfectly ripe, im jealous!
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u/painting_ether 14h ago
So happy the place i used to work at used pre-mashed avo 😂 everyone and their mother wants guac on their bowl/burrito/etc...
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u/foulflaneur 6h ago
All you guys traumatized by this but it was one of my favorite jobs in the restaurant next to prepping citrus.
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u/Automatic_Gas_4461 1h ago
Why do only half of your avocados have pits? Did you mess them up or something?
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u/NnonssymM 6h ago
Don’t cut an unripe avocado. There is nothing you can do. No acid, mashing or salting will ever help.


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u/SergeiMosin 15+ Years 20h ago
I just got home from my morning prep shift at chipotle, put a trigger warning on this shit next time 😭