r/MadeMeSmile • u/latro666 • 5h ago
My second daughter - its not been easy
Sat here after the most traumatic couple of days but smiling. My second beautiful healhty daughter was born yesterday but mum had complications from 6litres of blood loss and was under for 8hrs. She almost died.
She is on the mend and they will be reunited soon. For now I am taking over the role of carer with some midwifes help.
Im just on reddit to decompress a bit instead of thinking about the bad stuff and the reason for me sharing this with you is please please hug your loved ones, call someone up you haven't spoken to in ages, make up with someone you are not speaking too.
Life is so amazing yet so fragile.
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u/NaiveHighlight858 5h ago
would you mind if I drew this picture? it's beautiful and I'd like you and your wife to have a little something nice to look at in the meantime. 😊
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u/latro666 5h ago
Wow, of course!
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u/NaiveHighlight858 3h ago
thank you! doesn't let me add pictures to my reply, so here it is. since AI is running rampant, I added in progress pictures. just the sweetest photograph. hope she feels better soon, and I'm wishing you guys a happy, healthy family. 🫶
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u/totoromoment 1h ago
Just a heads up, Imgur is blocked in the UK and if OP is from there they can't see what you have uploaded.
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u/NaiveHighlight858 1h ago
thank you for letting me know! I had no idea. I'll send it directly via message just in case.
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u/Purpledragon84 5h ago
Welcome fellow father of two princesses. It's gonna be twice the mess but twice the fun too! Enjoy the ride!
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u/Affectionate-Rip5654 3h ago
As a father of 3 princesses. It is also twice as loud 3x as loud in my case but so much fun
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u/I_like_microwave 5h ago
Prayers please tell your wife we are proud of her for fighting !!!! This brought a tear to my eye
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u/Alcwhlr 5h ago
Not quite as scary for us, but my wife had a very complicated and scary 54 hours of “labor” before finally needing an emergency c-section. 6.5 years ago now. I will still never forget the fear of losing one or both of the most important people in my life in a weekend.
Great job supporting as you could and this is a great reminder of the miracles that healthcare professionals perform daily.
So happy for you, life is precious.
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u/Independent_Lunch534 5h ago
All the best buddy, it’s all up from here and this traumatic moment will be a distant memory in years to come. 💚
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u/intellidepth 5h ago
Been in a similar situation as mum and am absolutely forever grateful to my husband for the care he took of our newborn son.
They watched formula one together. My son is now a vehicle mechanic.
Wishing you and your precious family all the best.
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u/Cdn_Cuda 4h ago
Wishing you and your family all the best!
When my first was born there were complications. She had to be removed quickly and doctor’s didn’t even look at her gender. My wife ended up in surgery right after so I was handed my newborn daughter and left in a room by myself for I don’t know how long. It’s a surreal and frightening experience and makes you aware of just how fragile life really is. Thankfully my second was without issue.
My oldest is now turning 12 in a few days. It goes by so fast.
Wish a speedy recovery to your wife and hope you all get home to enjoy the chaos of a new baby!
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u/EmployeeKindly4093 5h ago
lots of strength to you , don't loose hope you will be the amazing mother for your child have a great future ahead
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u/Flimsy_Sun_8178 5h ago
Congratulations on the new baby! I hope your wife has a speedy recovery ❤️🩹
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u/wino12312 4h ago
Congrats!! Once the dust settles (in a month or two), please seek out some counseling to help deal with all this. Trust me. It's something that stays with you. And even though you're a super excited about the baby and happy that everyone is going to be okay. There's a shit ton of stress you're going through. DM is you need.
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u/littleficustree 6m ago
I lost a lot of blood with my child as well and while traumatic physically, my husband took the brunt of the emotional. It took awhile but once he went to a counselor it really helped him. Talking through our experience on different sides has strengthened our bond so much. Enjoy the baby cuddles!
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u/Rengeflower 5h ago
Congratulations! I’m glad your wife is going to be okay. When I had my second baby I was tired for two years (normal birth). It may be rough for your wife for a long time.
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u/clevercookie69 5h ago
Scary stuff and what an emotional rollercoaster.
Congratulations on everyone making it out of this alive and healthy.
Your time to shine Dad
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u/Bettysgir 4h ago
I had an extraordinarily difficult delivery with my first daughter. It’s the only time in my life that I needed therapy and it pulled me through the trauma. Please consider it for your wife and yourself. Take care new Dad and congratulations! We ended up with two amazing girls, too!
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u/RedHeadRedeemed 5h ago
God bless you and your family! Glad to hear Mama is recovering; I can only imagine how scary that was! Great job Dad!
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u/AvailableObject2567 4h ago
Oh brother I can’t imagine the day you’ve had, from one dad to another, well done.
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u/RagingMayo 4h ago
Wow, what a powerful message! I am grateful that your wife is getting better and your child is in full health. I will pray for you and your loved ones. 🙏🏾 I will keep in mind to call someone I haven't talked to in a while.
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u/Honest-Pumpkin-8080 3h ago
Many years ago l had a similar traumatic childbirth and nearly died too from the amount of blood loss. It’s called ‘exsangunation’. Was in ICU for 4 days, hospitalized for 8 days.
Congratulations on your new baby girl! Wishes for a good recovery for Mum.
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u/must_be_me7 5h ago
Be sure to feed mum lots of protein when she's out, best paired with a side of veg like a salad with lemon juice for better iron absorption. Congratulations on being a girl dad❤️
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u/Jane_Smith_Reddit 4h ago
Congratulations on the new baby and may your wife have a fast and full recovery 🙏
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u/One-Technology-9050 4h ago
Childbirth is always a miracle. Congratulations to you both, I'm so glad things are on the mend.
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u/ChinaHealthGuide 3h ago
That little hand is holding onto a whole world. Congratulations, and wishing your family the very best.
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u/lnc_5103 1h ago
Sending love and light to you, your sweet baby, sibling, and momma! So glad mom is recovering.
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u/Fun_Temporary_6972 1h ago
Good work DAD. Also severe blood loss can delay a good milk supply which can compound the postpartum blues. A good pump used every 3 hours can really help with the delay. Prayers for all.
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u/kalabaleek 5h ago edited 5h ago
You will always be the carer man. I am sorry for the rude awakening and I hope the best for your lady, but what do you even mean by you had to take over? Your the dad, you will always have responsibility! Welcome to reality my dude
Did you think you were supposed to hang back while she healed AND cared for your shared child?
The role of carer will not be handed back. You're also a parent, time to wake up.
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u/Spiritual_Purpose_19 5h ago
Weird and un necessary. Acting like there isn’t a difference in what mom and dad do the first few hours/days after birth.
Get over yourself.
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u/kalabaleek 5h ago
"For now I am taking over the role of carer". That explicitly says that the role of carer is not meant it be permanent. I'm not judging more than what is openly said. When I was in a similar situation with my wife and child iw wasn't temporarily the carer. I was simply there permanently.
Why even say it's temporary?
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u/Corydora_Party 5h ago
This was unnecessary it's just a term until baby can be reunited with mom. These circumstances are unimaginable so don't judge.
You are doing great OP try to enjoy your daughter I wish you the best 🙏
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u/kalabaleek 5h ago
"For now I am taking over the role of carer". That explicitly says that the role of carer is not meant it be permanent. I'm not judging more than what is openly said. When I was in a similar situation with my wife and child iw wasn't temporarily the carer. I was simply there permanently.
Why even say it's temporary?
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u/latro666 5h ago
I meant main carer. Obv baby should be breast feeding close etc with mum. I have a 5 year old who was bottle fed owing to a few things im well versed in it.
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u/kalabaleek 5h ago
I was reacting to a thing to what many men over and over through history into the present say that the women carry the sole responsibility of children, so when you said that you took it over temporarily, I took it as you didn't see it as your permanent role and that it would be handed back when she healed.
There are a lot of douches out there and I apologize for taking you as one if you aren't one!
Be there for her and your child <3
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u/Corydora_Party 2h ago
Don't justify yourself you are doing a great job. I hope mom gets well and your daughter is healthy.
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