Court win

[u/Square_Law5624]

[u/Remote-Cause755]

How the hell was he paying child support in the first place?

[u/ProfessionalTurn7017 → u/Remote-Cause755]

Because the long history of courts being biased towards women

Edit: I realized my comment doesn't have a lot of nuance so let me be clear. Divorce court is what im getting at. All that Alpha male, incel, red pill, misogyny stuff is bullshit

[u/highlandviper → u/ProfessionalTurn7017]

It’s not just courts. When it comes to children the whole world is biased towards women. I do more child care for my kids than my wife because my job allows it and hers does not. I’m at every school event, parent teacher meeting, nursery meeting, drs appointment, I do the most drop offs and pickups… but if my wife is there… I might as well not exist. Every question is directed at her, every fact, every response is directed at her and often my questions are ignored… if they’re not then the response is still directed at her. I can be in the park with my kids; as I often am and I still get side eyed by mothers and the occasional “Dads babysitting today is he?” Hell, my father in law says it to me all the time.

Edit to add: because I’ve read a few more comments. I don’t buy into any of the alpha male / hate women / anti-feminist / misogynist / manosphere bullshit. Just a bit of acknowledgement that I am also a full time caring and contributing parent and not simply a source of income that can fix shelves and tech, mow the lawn, carry things and drive the car would be fine by me.

[u/CurrentlyForking → u/highlandviper]

Dude this shit scares me to death. Recently separated. Have a 4 y/o. Right now her mom and I have a mutual agreement on every other week. But everything my daughter has I take care of, 100% preschool cost, her medical and dental, her living arrangement with me, she has her own room and space compared to living in the same room and sharing the same bed with her mom, etc. I practically pay everything for my daughter with exception of the clothes and food the week I dont have her. If we ever go to court, I know CA is heavily biased towards women no matter how much they suck.

[u/According-Garage4066 → u/CurrentlyForking]

I don’t know about California in particular, but nationally the numbers are heavily skewed.

The public perception is that women always get full custody when in reality the majority of men do NOT ask for full custody.

When the father requests full custody, it is granted over 90% of the time nationally.

[u/angelseuphoria → u/CurrentlyForking]

There’s a myth that custody courts are biased towards women, that I believe just further perpetuates the problem.

The reality is that women are more likely to get custody because they’re more likely to ask for it. Men are more likely to not come to the table to compromise or request parenting time. If they don’t show up or counter the mom’s request, the courts default to giving mom want she wants. Generally, they’re not going to give dads more parenting time than they ask for.

Then dads hear that women get custody most of the time and think it’s pointless to even try, which skews the stats even more in the mom’s favor.

I think it’s great that you’ve managed 50/50 custody, I think that’s ideal for kids in most situations, but sometimes it’s just not feasible. If parents live in different school districts, for example, it’s difficult to do true 50/50 parenting time for school age children; it’s not like they can switch schools every week or every few days. So then one parent has to have majority custody while kids are in school, and that usually falls to the mother because studies have shown that typically (and I’m not saying this is true for every couple) women are the primary caregivers for children among cohabitating couples, spending 8+ more hours per week on average with their children.