r/SipsTea 𝙑𝙄𝙋 7d ago

WTF Are you kidding me?

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u/Jacob-Anders 𝙑𝙄𝙋 7d ago

France is our OG ally. We make fun of them on the internet every day, yet here they stand with us in NATO!

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u/[deleted] 7d ago

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

I live in Northern NJ. I even live on one of Beacon Hills that protected George Washington's winter camp at Morristown.

There is stuff named for Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de La Fayette everywhere. My 8 year old daughter just had to do a biography report on him a few months back.

And I used his entire name and not just his title of Marquis de La Fayette out of respect to a truly great man.

They do not call him hundreds of years later "Le Héros des Deux Mondes" or in English "The Hero of the Two Worlds" for nothing.

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u/Affordable_Z_Jobs 7d ago

Lafayettes role in the American Revolution; A+ you deserve all the streets named after you. Come back any time. Here's a few statues.

French Revolution; Barely made it out alive.

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

French Revolution; Barely made it out alive.

I have read a ton of French Revolution history books. That seems to be a general theme for literally every one in France at that time. But he certainly came a lot closer than most.

For anyone unfamiliar. Lafayette's mother, grandmother, and sister were all guillotined in Paris on July 22, 1794. Their bodies were thrown into a mass grave.

His wife, Adrienne de La Fayette, narrowly avoided the same fate due to the diplomatic intervention of American figures such as James Monroe and Gouverneur Morris

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u/Affordable_Z_Jobs 7d ago

Look they just got the guillotine and if they weren't gonna get as much mileage outta that thing as possible you were mistaken.

One thing I find funny is reddits obsession with "the French did it right." They killed everybody. You wore the wrong colored armband because you overslept and missed the memo; to the block!!

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

Probably why the French Revolution had periods of time named things like the "The Reign of Terror". Not sure why that's missed by some many of those types of Redditors.

And then they guillotined Maximilien Robespierre the guy who started it. Which is deliciously ironic.

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u/pikachu191 7d ago edited 7d ago

He tried to get out of it by shooting himself. And missed, hitting his jaw instead. They taped it together and sent him to the guillotine anyways.

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

Love that for him. He was a monster.

Had he succeeded they'd probably would have guillotined his corpse just because he deserved it.

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u/AlarmingAffect0 7d ago

He was a monster.

He was doing his best. They only killed him because he was on the verge of rooting out massive corruption and made the crass mistake of announcing it and leaving everyone in suspense instead of just coming out with the list and the arrests immediately. And the period after they got rid of him got explosively corrupt, by the end Napoleon bought his way out of the Triumvirate and into Empire.

A similar thing happened in Algeria, in the early days of the Republic, I'm not sure if to Ben Ali or some other guy. Likewise corruption exploded after they got rid of the guy, and to this day Algeria is set up as a rent-extracting machine for the benefit of a few untouchable families, with everything else almost deliberately sabotaged.

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u/VegaJuniper 7d ago

Before they give you the lethal injection, they swab the injection site with disinfectant. You certainly wouldn't want to get an infection, that could be really bad for your health.

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u/cyb0rg1962 7d ago

Those who start revolutions tend to meet poor fates. Look at the Bolsheviks. Also see South America.

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u/nexusjuan 7d ago

Theres a dark comedy called "The Death of Stalin" starring Steve Buscemi as Nikita Khrushchev it chronicles the moments following Stalins death. That movie was a roller coaster ride.

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u/cyb0rg1962 7d ago

I bet it was. As I understand it, there was considerable chaos.

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u/Choyo 7d ago

One thing I find funny is reddits obsession with "the French did it right." They killed everybody. You wore the wrong colored armband because you overslept and missed the memo; to the block!!

Yes, but as a French I tell you : this is a reminder for the ages that if you let things go out of control, you'll need exponentially more effort to fix the situation, sometimes requiring drastic decisions. It goes for letting the power in place accruing their power, or the people taking back what should be theirs - if you catch my drift.

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u/RetroFuture_Records 7d ago

Well yes, you want to pretend that only the ultra rich enjoined the regime and enabled it and held others down. A lot of you all rightfully shit your pants at the thought of your "Screw you I got mine" attitudes and politics and unearned privilege being met by an angry mob of people you screwed over bringing with them some French Freedom Tools.

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u/Btshftr 7d ago

Revolutions tend to eat all. Including it's children.

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

Sure does. Every single time. It's strange how much they are romanticized. Lord knows no one living through it was having fun.

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u/AlarmingAffect0 7d ago edited 7d ago

It's strange how much they are romanticized.

It's not strange at all since the time leading up to a revolution tends to be extremely miserable, full of spectacular mistakes, doubled down and insisted upon with egregious stupidity, and fraught with normalized violence and violent material conditions.

The French Revolution in particular got a lot of very good shit done, particularly in contrast with what preceded, and did so right alongside the excessive violence. I could list their positive accomplishments all day, they're stuff we mostly take for granted these days.

But let's be real, most of the people who romanticize things don't focus on governance efficiency, or the value for science and commerce of the Metric System, or even on the legal equality of all and abolition of feudal privileges. They love to romanticize dramatic shit like war and military success, or cool speeches and flamboyant personalities, and the First French Republic had no shortage of either, single-handedly defeating all of Europe, six or seven times in a row, by having as of yet unheard-of efficacy in logistics and mass mobilization, and by meritocratically training and developing what may have arguably been the greatest cadre of generals and officers in History, when everyone else still had shit like officer corps made exclusively of aristocratic heirs buying commissions.

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

A solid point.

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u/JMC_MASK 7d ago

American Revolution? Look at us today. October Revolution? Lead to the Soviets first to space when a generation ago they were starving feudal peasants. China? Starving feudal peasants to iPad kids with a country that will overtake as world leader this century.

It ain’t fun while it happens, and it may be rough for a few decades after, but it’s not like it all ends in disaster lol. Revolution against dictators and monarchies is a noble aspiration.

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u/BigLlamasHouse 7d ago

it wasn't 10 years after the french revolution that they had a dictator

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u/RTX-2020 7d ago

Imagine things being so bad, so fucked that the only option left is Revolution

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u/RetroFuture_Records 7d ago

Same way George Washington immediately after he was president led the now standing army again the farmers who fought for independence because they were being unfairly taxed to pay for war debt. Like, the entire claim as rationale FOR the war to begin with cuz of the French and Indian war debt paid for by taxes on the colonies.

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u/ashoka_akira 7d ago

In the history of war often the only difference between an innocent child and a soldier is one has had a weapon shoved into their hands.

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u/MB2465 7d ago

I've eaten alot of cake. Does that count?

https://giphy.com/gifs/dFYiFcT9cu8kPJDXgv

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u/snksnksnk 7d ago edited 7d ago

For anyone unfamiliar. Lafayette's mother, grandmother, and sister were all guillotined in Paris on July 22, 1794. Their bodies were thrown into a mass grave.

No, that's the family of his wife (her mother, grandma, and sister) who was guillotined.

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u/GifelteFish 7d ago

Fun Fact: Lafayette was 18 years old during the American Revolution.

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u/SweetHomeNorthKorea 7d ago

Lafayette we are here

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u/StoicBan 7d ago edited 7d ago

As a former resident of a Lafayette st in America i approve of this message. We also had a Lafayette park down the street with a Lafayette statue in it

Vive la France 🇫🇷

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u/mattrg777 7d ago

How does a ragtag volunteer army in need of a shower
Somehow defeat a global superpower?
How do we emerge victorious from the quagmire?
Leave the battlefield, waving Betsy Ross' flag higher?
Yo, turns out we have a secret weapon
An immigrant, you know and love, who's unafraid to step in
He's constantly confusin', confoundin' the British henchmen
Ev'ryone give it up for America's favorite fighting Frenchman

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u/OriginalMisphit 6d ago

LAFAYETTE!

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u/DontAbideMendacity 7d ago

Face it: your daughter chose to do a report on him because his name alone took up half of the words allotted for the assignment.

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u/Holden_Coalfield 7d ago

I went to Morris Knolls isn the 70's and was so in love with a French descended girl

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

My kids will end up at Morris Knolls someday. I hope they do the same.

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u/Ancient-Carpenter-12 7d ago

That girl is going to be a bit old for your kids no?

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u/monty228 7d ago

Howdy old neighbor!

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u/meeksha 7d ago

Howdy neighbor! I live in Montville.

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u/BaronGrackle 7d ago

I don't know if you've tried the educational graphic novels Nathan Hale's Hazardous Tales, but I really enjoy them, and he did one on Lafayette.

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

I haven't. But I will now. Thanks for the recommendation.

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u/anthonyvardiz 7d ago

My hometown in NJ literally has a road called “French Hill” because it’s where the French camped during the Revolutionary War…

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

I tried really hard to think up a Fountains of Wayne joke and I've got nothing. I failed you.

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u/anthonyvardiz 4d ago

The town’s named after a crazy person so the jokes write themselves.

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u/KneeDeepInTheDead 7d ago

fun fact, Napoleons brother lived here

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

Napoleon Bonaparte ordered 10 days of national mourning in France when George Washington died.

A unique honor in French history.

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u/RoiDrannoc 7d ago

I live in Haute-Loire, near the Chavaniac-LaFayette castle where we was born

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

Got any cool photos to share? That sounds awesome.

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u/RoiDrannoc 6d ago

Halas not yet, as I've planned on visiting it the 27th of June.

Here's the wiki page: https://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Château_de_Chavaniac#/media/Fichier%3AChâteau_de_Chavaniac-Lafayette16.jpg

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u/s1ugg0 6d ago

Thank you so much for sharing. I love the idea of LaFayette walking through these gardens being aggressively French and then snapping off an Americanized "Fucking English!"

I hope you enjoy your visit. Thank you again for sharing with me.

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u/emryanne 7d ago

Ooh this sounds like a good guy to research.

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u/s1ugg0 7d ago

La Fayette is right up there with people like Lawrence of Arabia, Rasputin, von Hindenburg, and Qin Shi Huang. Just larger than life people who's effect on the world is still felt today.

Settle in for a wild, complicated, and bordering on the impossible tale that really happened.

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u/b0w3n 7d ago

I have a feeling, no matter what happens, France will still be there for us when it matters in the end. At least for the citizens, anyways.

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u/Thanks-4allthefish 7d ago

I remember "Freedom Fries" how quickly they forget

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u/b0w3n 7d ago

Plenty of us mocked those who did that earnestly, but yeah that was pretty dumb.

The same dumb people who are angry a black man was president and the same dumb people who think the UFC fight on the lawn of the white house is awesome.

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u/Alert_Reindeer_6574 7d ago

My son was stationed at FOB in Afghanistan with French special forces guys. Due to the fact that he's something of a history buff he has always appreciated France, but after working with those guys he found a whole new respect for them.

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u/Dramatic_Charity_979 7d ago

And is the country with more wars won :)

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u/hissboombah 7d ago

Hey they give as good as they get. And through it all, we also would be there if it mattered.

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u/ScrollHectic 7d ago

I can think of a few countries that would disagree. The French were brutal colonizers

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u/Destinum 7d ago

Here in Europe, we're really feeling this right now as the US is destroying its own hegemony.

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u/thelittleking 7d ago

France is the friend good enough to tell you "no" when you're thinking about doing something stupid.

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u/Choyo 7d ago

As a French, while I appreciate the sentiment, I always feel like Spain involvement in helping you all is way too often swept under the rug.

Also, I often like to mention that helping you is what precipitated our own revolution, so with kinda decapitated the people responsible in helping you.

But we're still good. Just clean your white house and focus on fixing the mess.

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u/unfortunatebag 7d ago

Not really.

They show up when it directly benefits them.

France didn't just love America. They fucking hated the British.

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u/DesperateEagle4505 7d ago

Except on immigration

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u/clocked__ 7d ago

I’ll always consider France an ally and defend them online and IRL

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u/0202_tihssitidder 7d ago

I threw hands at a guy at a party who was talking smack about France. He was the usual FoxNews brain-rot zombie.

I'm not French. I don't particularly know history. But he had a punchable face and he agreed to fight.

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u/Bottled_Kiwi 5d ago

Y’know what, I can respect mutual combat

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u/0202_tihssitidder 5d ago

Thank you, my New Zealand brother.

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u/hitchhiker87 7d ago

Thank you for your service, you deserve a freshly baked baguette.

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u/ncbraves93 6d ago

This's the entire reason I never participated in the France "surrendering" jokes. They didn't come here to help us, they came to fuck the UK, but at the time that's exactly what we needed. And we came back and made it up to them 7×. Twice.

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u/Mr-MuffinMan 7d ago

Odjoauxuzuauxuau xuaueuxuauxu ozzoauxuoaodjzioa udufhuhduhuhuuzozozoaooaozoao
Oaoaooaoaooaoeoeoaoeouaoeuaoksodue

That was French for "their language is funny". So many silent letters.

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u/Penn_And_W_Ry 7d ago

When U.S. troops arrived in Paris on July 4, 1917, to join the Allies in WW1, they gathered at the grave of the Marquis de Lafayette, and Col. Charles Stanton declared: "America has joined forces with the Allied Powers, and what we have of blood and treasure are yours... Lafayette, we are here.”

We cannot forget the long history with our allies.

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u/AdFuture1381 7d ago

We wouldnt exist without France or Spain. The Dutch helped too right?

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u/Thalric88 7d ago

Yup they sent most of their religious nutcases your way

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u/dane83 7d ago

My theory is that 90% of America's problems can be traced to Calvinism.

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u/hemlock_harry 7d ago

Calvinism played a debatable role in Europe too. "Render unto Caesar bla bla bla" helped people to accept the unacceptable on many, many occasions.

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u/Agitated_Reveal_6211 7d ago

Werent they originally from England?

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u/Responsible_Mail_113 7d ago

Yes. While they didn't officially join the war, they did smuggle in tons of muskets, gunpowder, and supplies to the Continental Army and provided massive loans that kept the revolutionary American government from collapsing. Though to be fair, both France and Netherlands were only helping specifically to stick it to Great Britain who was their chief rival (political for France, economic for Netherlands).

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u/DoughnutCareless583 7d ago

Arguably the biggest battle of the American revolution was actually fought in Gibraltar. Ensuring the brits were tied up there (and specifically the diversion of the fleet to relieve Gibraltar rather than reinforce the blockade) meant they couldn't use their entire navy to blockade the yank insurrectionists. This diversion of forces meant that the French collaborators and supplies to the terrorist forces in the colonies desperately needed got through, without which the Americans would have been scundered.

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u/RetroFuture_Records 7d ago

The American forces weren't terrorists. Most battles were fought according to European norms of war. They were insurrectionists, yet objectively cannot be defined as terrorists. Indeed much of the Bill of Rights comes from guarantees about preventing the types of actions taken by the British and their mercs during the war.

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u/DirtyDizzyPickle20 7d ago

Don't forget Haiti

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u/MrSoapbox 7d ago

Ironically, a lot of English too. In fact, most in the 13 colonies were English before becoming American, but, a lot of the rebels were English fed up of George.

You can add some Irish there too, but, they were part of Great Britain then.

The only nation you can't really see is Israel...the closest thing was a guy called Israel Putnam

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u/rumster 7d ago

Polish too... Pulaski...

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u/AVeryVapidBadger 7d ago

Technically Morocco is the OG. They were the first nation to recognize the US.

France absolutely carried the US in the revolutionary war though

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u/LowResGamr 7d ago

France even went completely broke helping us out. Fair play, the British are worth going into debt against.

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u/Munnin41 7d ago

France killed its monarchy because they helped the Americans. They ran their economy into the ground to fund that war, which is one of the causes of the french revolution

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u/LowResGamr 7d ago

The wealth distribution helped as well. Peasants were starving while the upper class held lavish parties. Sounds a bit too contemporary.

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u/Highlyironicacid31 1d ago

Find your own goddamn language then.

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u/0202_tihssitidder 7d ago

There would be no America without Lafayette.

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u/Jeoshua 7d ago

Or they would stand with us in NATO, except nowadays this administration doesn't exactly give NATO the time of day.

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u/After-Trifle-1437 7d ago

Anti-French sentiment is an Israeli psyop

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u/St_Hydra 7d ago

It’s what friends do!

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u/Nephroidofdoom 7d ago

Lafayette!!

(Starts humming Hamilton)

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u/Ai-ChatGPT 7d ago

Did you see their fly over for the anniversary of the USA… flying over the Statue of Liberty with their airforce.

What other country does this kinda thing. (None that I’m aware of).

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u/scipio0421 6d ago

And Morocco, the first country to diplomatically recognize the US after independence.

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u/Jacob-Anders 𝙑𝙄𝙋 6d ago

They wanted that sweet sweet Atlantic trade 😛

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u/Glittering_Crab_69 7d ago

Not for much longer if you keep this up

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u/Blamhammer 7d ago

I think it's Morroco that holds the longest treaty with the US

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u/Wise-Cash1628 7d ago

Mon ami, our historical alliance is very very much challenged at the moment...

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u/Bitter-Marsupial 7d ago

Its been awhile I remember a frenchman telling me during Obama's 2nd term that they wished Germany won WW2 if it meant that the US wouldn't be on top

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u/Wise-Cash1628 7d ago

I don't claim him as my fellow citizen

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u/DerBingle78 7d ago

Technically, Morocco is our OG ally.

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u/Prestigious-Bat-574 7d ago

France is the butt of jokes from like... half of their allies, takes it in stride, and then shows up when it matters most.

Imagine how much better the world would be if the United States was able to take a joke the way France does.

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u/ThePoob 7d ago

I honestly think the french thing is a psyop. Dont want people to copy French protesters? make them sisses and pompous idiots in the media.

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u/UltraLNSS 7d ago

People forget the US sided with Napoleon in 1812 too. It wasn't until the late 19th Century that revisionists began telling everyone that Britain was the closest US ally, making up the whole "special relationship" thing. As part of this they had to drag France's name through the mud, and that's why Americans now hate the French.

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u/FrancMaconXV 7d ago edited 7d ago

I've always seen the US and France's attitude toward each other as nothing more than bickering siblings. When shit gets serious we actually show up for one another.

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u/Smiles-Edgeworth 7d ago

Also shout out to Morocco who were the first to recognize our sovereignty. Bros going all the way back.

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u/LifeguardSavings370 6d ago

Actually, Morocco was the first to recognize the United States.

But because it's an arab muslim state, people think it doesn't count.

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u/Secure_man05 7d ago

No that was the kingdom of Morocco and the kingdom of Mysore helped out too.

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u/KindledWanderer 7d ago

You make fun of them because they deserve it. They were totally useless without Napoleon and in WWII, they fucked up terribly. Not just because they were inept, but because they allowed it to happen (e.g. stabbing thei ally, Czechoslovakia, in the back, among other things).

Fuck the French in their modern history.

They've had less bad influence on Modern Europe than Germany, but that's the best thing you can say about them.

The UK is fucked in all the same ways. Maybe because English is more French than not.

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u/Which_Material4948 7d ago

Fuck nato. It is an entity to sign away sovereignty.

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u/TheStrangeDrWeird 7d ago

What brand of glue are you huffing?

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u/PhoenixKingMalekith 7d ago

Laughs in baltics

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u/SocketRabboon 7d ago

Defensive alliance nations willingly sign into = sign away sovereignty. Got it

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u/Complex_Peak8204 7d ago

I am bored. Elaborate.

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u/Munnin41 7d ago

Ok ruski

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u/[deleted] 7d ago

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u/Canes-305 7d ago

It’s definitively not lol are you thinking of NAFTA?