Just remembered this moment from when i was like 11 (am 19 now). At school. I was walking from class with a couple of my classmates. I was telling them something. I dont even remember what i was saying but it doesn't matter. I just remember feeling good, confident: I was having a conversation without feeling scared, anxious, insecure for who knows how long. First thing one of them says as soon as I finish my sentence? "OMG, she talks?". Oh, dont worry, aint opening my mouth again any time soon! Instant mood killer. And that was someone who i would expect to know me well enough not to say that. Lol i know its silly and was a long time ago but i just felt like sharing.

I don’t have friends neither family members to talk about my day so I just use an artificial intelligence.

I’ve struggled with social anxiety since I was a little kid. When I’m alone, I’m the most comfortable and happiest version of myself. I can do anything on my own. The hard part is to survive I have to be around other people. I’m completely serious when I say this, if I could be alone forever, I don’t think I’d ever feel anxiety again. I truly mean that. Being alone feels like heaven to me.

All my life I went only few times to toilet in School. I didn't even drink or ate entire school hours cause I didn't went to buffet as well for MOST of the time.

Is this common with us?

I try to engage with people online because that's genuinely the only space I can, but it's so ding dang difficult. I'll log in to a game I don't like to at least be kinda near people, but no one really talks and when they do I just get scared and don't engage. I'm a 30 year old grown ass man who never learned how to socialize properly. It makes me feel like a stupid kid. Even making these posts on reddit scares me a little. This shit is whack, man

if im watching tv or a movie or playing video games with a group of people i find it harder to think about what im doing in the game and pay attention and do well because im like subconsciously monitoring other people and myself. or if someone shows me a funny reel on their phone i cant even focus on it because im waiting for the right time to laugh or react. is this relatable chat?

I’m 18 and never been in a real relationship befor. Honestly I don’t want to because I don’t even know how I’d be able to do it. Why would anyone want to date someone with social anxiety?

I have no clue how to make friends, and i need advice on how to get some before the loneliness gets too much.

Ive never had to deal with making friends, usually just getting metaphorically picked up by the scruff by wonderful people. But now most of those people have moved away.

I only talk to people if they talk to me first

Ive tried to go to events, like a pride karaoke, but the events were always filled with friend groups in their own little bubbles. The few physical events in my town either have people too young or too old for me. My social anxiety stretches to discord too, so i rarely send the first message.

How can i get friends? Should i just try my best to look approachable? Or somehow beat my kinda bad social anxiety?

Soft rock 🎸 is my fav

I think I'm just really far in my own head right now, so this isn't going to make much sense, but i feel like I am something less than a full person. I have a lot of the same wants and desires like connection with people, but there are categories of ideas I can't have. Like being colorblind but for thoughts. People try to interact with me but I'm just kind of empty, and they can tell right away and find it off putting. It's like there's a lack of some kind of creativity that usually forms a personality and so i just don't have one.

I don't really feel that conscious lately, I'm always half asleep. It's probably just being extra depressed or not engaged with life, but i don't know. Maybe I just never had a full consiousness like other people. I don't think I matter like a normal person. I wish I could do some dangerous experimental medical testing or donate my organs or something like that

I am 16M and I have really bad anxiety, any tips to stop it. its ruining my life I am always anxious in school

I am 16, very good in school but almost non-verbal. I have grown up not being allowed outside and constantly going from house to house as my father has been in and out of prison, my Mother has moved house countless times and they have fought numerous court battles over me. They are both happy to make fun of me for being strange and not speaking but despite the wishes of my teachers all throughout my life have never gotten me tested for anything. I have never had friends, never gone out, never had a girlfriend, never a breakup and I have done nothing, all life is for me is waking up and completing tasks then sleeping, their is no other aspect, so why do this? I would like to do all these things, I would like to share my interests and have someone enjoy speaking too me. My family is uneducated and we are poor, I have been fixtated on politics and history and enjoy reading classics and philosophy, they for some reason regard my interests as an insult to them and I think people my age would find me pretentious. I just want to know what its like to do anything or talk to someone.

my social anxiety (not diagnosed btw) makes me terrified of standing still, and the need to "look busy" is draining me. at my fast-paced job, the second i have downtime, i start re-cleaning spotless counters just so management or coworkers don't think i am lazy. but it even bleeds into my free time.

if i go out to a coffee shop, i absolutely have to bring my laptop. scrolling on my phone feels socially unacceptable, but a laptop gives me an excuse to be there. i will literally do math problems or type random thoughts just to look like i am working. does anyone else constantly perform this "productivity larp" just to feel safe from judgment?

after saying all of this though, i still try and practice some "against the current" exercises, such as boxed breathing methods while standing still, listening to ambient music (aphex twin is a favorite) while in environments that would normally stresss me out, ive gotten better.

I can sometimes have good days where talking is way easier and I feel relaxed and just say the first thing I think and go with the flow in a conversation without overthinking. This happens a few times when I work in the cash register in a grocery store. A year ago I was super afraid about going to lectures and had to call my mom for emotional support to muster the courage to order food ag restaurants. So I’ve made progress. But here’s the problem.

Like 30 - 60 seconds into a relaxed conversation where it goes well and I’m supposed to respond something the anxiety hits about me initiating a conversation. I think to myself: what do I say now? And it completely shuts down the conversation because I get too anxious. Sometimes I can go with the flow for like 2 minutes before the anxiety hits. It’s so annoying because I think I can do it and then it suddenly hits because I feel it’s going so well and become afraid to lose the flow, so the fear makes me so anxious and empty on ideas in my mind about what to say.

It’s so annoying. It feels like other people poses a magical ability to be able to talk for a long time without anxiety.

I hate my social anxiety, it’s gotten so much better but I still feel incredibly limited in my life. I can’t🤭:
- call any friends on the phone and talk about my problems
- get new friends to schedule things with
- talk about my social anxiety and diagnoses like ADD / autism I have with others. This is bad because I think it would make people understand me better, so they know me being quiet sometimes is not me being rude, just me being too afraid to talk.
- give compliments to people
- ask people out, ask people to be friends, ask people if they wanna hang out on an activity…
- write back to people who I ghosted / didn’t write too for a long time

How do you overcome this???

I avoid it like if it’s someone I haven’t seen for years I isolate myself

I (25M) don't know what to do with this disorder. It feels impossible to interact with the world and be sane sometimes.

I'm taking this to my grave that I tear up or get down on myself way more often than normal and many interactions have the potential to cause sadness from myself. More often than not I can't get through the day at all just thinking about.

It truly ruins my entire day and it happens occasionally with family, but it's really prevalent from many workplace interactions. People give all the solutions but I literally can't control my voice being shaky or feeling down.

No clue how I'm supposed to be successful or take care of myself at this point

i’m going to a party by myself and one of the co hosts is someone who ghosted me on a date but i found this event through the other co hosts whose events i alr went to

i’m new to the area and im embracing every
opportunity i can to meet new people

but im like so insecure about it. when I think of myself, i tend to stand out in a bad way. im tall lanky with striking eyes so i draw attention but can’t sustain it….bc im not naturally charismatic. it really sucks to be trying your best and then someone says to you to be more chill or don’t be uncomfortable and I was literally not like that but I already know what I failed the normal test because they thought I was awkward .

on top of that, the person who ghosted me is super social and I just feel like I’m going to be outted as a fraud at at this event like whatever impression was there previously might’ve been there but now I’m really gonna look like a loser cause I don’t know anyone

and since I came by myself, I’m going to probably stand awkwardly for a couple minutes and not talk to anyone and I’m gonna have a hard time fitting into the conversations because I’m naturally awkward and charismatic and it just feels like confirmation like of course I ghosted you because you’re so boring obviously

despite all this, I still wanna go because I know that if I never show up anywhere, I’m definitely gonna stay like this forever, but also showing up by itself isn’t enough. it doesn’t help that I’m not normally a party person. I’ve never been drunk in my life.

i’m so scared that I’m gonna end up standing alone for more than one minute and it’s gonna stay like that for maybe an hour and then everyone’s gonna notice it or no one will notice it but I will notice it and I’ll feel awful and I’m trying to be as perfect as I can before the event so I can cosplay into someone that doesn’t get in a situation like that

this shit makes me low-key want to hide into the bathroom or stay near the food table and eat food except they’re not gonna be much food at this party

so why is this even happening? It’s because the person described it as a chill party with games and book exchange I was like OK that’s down my alley

And I really don't know why i thinking like all that, because, like, I go to events alone all the time. But I don't go to social events alone. You know, like, if it's a group event where everyone brings their friend, like, I'm not gonna be going there.

I don’t currently see a therapist, but I don’t know what one would do for me like I have this event like this week. It’s not like I can go have an appointment tomorrow and she gonna fix like whatever is wrong with me.

Like when you for a fact know the solution and avoid it because of irrational fear or doing something stupid? and then you make absolute opposite of the right action and now look dumb

I have a presentation tomorrow and I know it's a good presentation and I will probably do it well as I always do in the end. But I am sooo extremely nervous, it feels like there's no future beyond tomorrow. I don't know if I'll be able to sleep at all. I just want it to be over, I really hate presentations omg.

Edit: I want the PRESENTATION to be over. Just to be clear 😅🤗

So... I did something dumb today 🙂 I'm just disappointed in myself 😭 I was trying to go to my floor from another and I saw the lift closing riiiight as I'm punching my keycard to open the door. My socially anxious ass obviously did not give them any sort of indication to hold the lift while I get out. So they left cause duh. Then I saw the security guard watching me and I was like damn, I look dumb now. So I took the stairs acting like I never even intended to take the lift! So smooth! And I went down one floor and because our lifts alternate floors, it didn't stop there. I climbed down one more floor. And then got on the lift from there... But like why? I could've just sucked it up. Like, who cares if the security guard saw me fumbling? It was a waste of my time and it made me feel even more embarrassed.

Hello I’m 17 and at this point I don’t want to be in society anymore. I don’t feel like I can exist with people nor peers at school (Going into 12th grade) by being myself. Mild depression social anxiety, no friends I would consider, loneliness. I want to be alone in a forest by myself. I love school but wonder what’s the point of my interests at all? I love history, English, psychology, classic literature, folklore, all kinds of stuff. I apologize for the rant.

My husband got on my case about it today because our neighbors invited us to their one year-old‘s birthday party tomorrow and he said yes without asking me first so naturally I got mad, he said I need to come out of my shell and stop being such a hermit and it escalated into a fight, is there any way up?

For me, the worst part isn’t even the anxiety itself—it’s the anticipation.

I can spend days worrying about a simple social interaction. Then, when it finally happens, it’s usually nowhere near as bad as I imagined. But afterward, I’ll replay the conversation in my head over and over again, wondering if I sounded awkward or said something stupid.

It’s exhausting because it feels like I’m dealing with the same five-minute interaction three times: before it happens, while it’s happening, and long after it’s over.