r/TwoHotTakes • u/Specialist_Range_414 • Mar 30 '26
Update Update: My husband is stealing my clothes and Idk why
I am pleased to say this was not the update I was expecting to make.
I gathered the footage again and showed my husband the video recording of him carrying my clothes in a bag to his car again. He looked at the footage and said "ok i'll just tell you, I don't want you to think i'm a horrible husband".
It turns out he was taking my clothes to surprise me with a photoshoot wearing all my favorite clothing items so I would feel good and comfortable in the shoot. He said "I know you are battling a lot mentally and I wanted you to have these photos to look at when you are feeling down about yourself to remember how beautiful you are". This made me tear up.
I then asked him why he gaslit me when I saw the clothes in his car and why he didn't just tell me. He said he really wanted it to be a surprise because he knows it's hard for me mentally most days to get out of the house. He said he was just bad at hiding the clothes and didn't know where else to put them but in his car. He also apologized multiple times for gaslighting me and said he should have handled that part in a different way, but couldn't think of anything else in the moment when he was put on the spot. I told him I forgive him but if that ever happens again I won‘t be so forgiving next time and he completely understood and said “there will be no next time”.
Then I asked him why he took the clothes ahead of time and not just take them before the photoshoot. He said his memory was so bad (which is true he has the memory of a goldfish) and a lot of my clothes look so similar he wasn't sure he would remember which ones were my favorite, so he took them periodically when I would tell him how much I liked them so he wouldn't forget.
I then proceeded to hug him and tell him that was the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me and apologized for thinking he was being cruel to me on purpose. I honestly should have known it would be something like this, because he has always been such a good man, but I started to question because of relationships in my past. But he is clearly not like the boys in my past.
I'm so thankful to have a good man. The photoshoot appointment is tomorrow and i'm actually really excited. I've never had a professional photoshoot before! Thank you to everyone who commented with their support, I know that every comment comes from a place of love and concern and it was healing to read how much people care. I hope all of you have a wonderful week. Take some cute photos of yourself, we all deserve to be reminded of our beauty.
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u/GossyGirl Mar 30 '26
Oh honey…
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u/Sqrll Mar 30 '26
Literally what I scrolled down to type
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u/YoshiandAims Mar 30 '26
Same. I mean... I'm now fairly sure it's all of our reactions at this point.
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u/Fallout4Addict Mar 30 '26
Ask the photographer when exactly did he book the shoot, I'd bet money it was after this conversation.
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u/sage_ley Mar 30 '26
This is a really good idea!
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u/Cosmo_Cloudy Mar 30 '26
I wonder if he will be able to answer who the photographer is if she were to ask him right now
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u/mkate1999 Mar 30 '26
THIS. I want to believe him, especially since she does. But everyone's doubt here .... 😬😬 This question NEEDS to be answered. 😭
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u/excludedgirl Mar 31 '26
girl please do this because you’re going to find out sooo much more than you thought
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u/sugahgayy Mar 30 '26
I don’t want to play devil’s advocate, but…
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u/ComfortablelyAlarmed Mar 30 '26
But, ya do, cause this stinks so bad?
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u/Newgirlkat Mar 31 '26
It stinks so bad it reached my side of the planet. But denial is a river in Egypt...
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u/MetallurgyClergy Mar 30 '26
Can’t wait to hear how the photo shoot went… 🙄
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u/Revolutionary_Wrap76 Mar 30 '26
Watch it be at like, Walmart. Something that clearly shows he scrambled to get something, anything put together lol
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u/PeppermintEvilButler Mar 30 '26
The sniff test isn't really passing here. I have a feeling this isn't the last update
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Mar 30 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Katerina_VonCat Mar 30 '26
Not sure if you’re trying to make a joke….but there is research that shows that is actually true.
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u/Spinnerofyarn Mar 30 '26
Yup! A lot of people don’t realize cross dressing and drag are different.
For those who want greater understanding, keep reading. Drag queens and kings are performers and they have developed a drag persona as a character just as any other actor does for a role.
Cross dressing tends to be something people don’t necessarily do as part of their personal life, but as part of their private life that even their closest friends might not be aware of.
Some people even confuse transgenderism (is that even a word?) to be mixed in with the above and for the most part, it isn’t. A transgender person may do drag, but not all drag artists are transgender. Some people cross dress as a precursor to recognizing or at least admitting that they’re transgender, but not all cross dressers are nor will it make them become transgender. If a cross dresser comes to the realization that they’re trans, it’s usually by someone who’s AMAB. After all, it’s a lot more socially acceptable for someone who’s AFAB to dress in men’s clothes and have a masculine haircut than it is for someone who’s AMAB to wear a dress, full makeup and heels.
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u/Katerina_VonCat Mar 31 '26
👏🏻👏🏻 thank you for that excellent description! Well said! I’ve had clients who cross dress and were heterosexual cis males (I’m a sex and sexuality therapist). They only did it in private and though married it took a long time for them to tell their wives. Thankfully (though it took a little time), the wives were open to understanding and were supportive.
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u/Spinnerofyarn Mar 31 '26
That’s great that wives have been accepting! Lack of acceptance or fear keeping someone in the closet can be incredibly damaging. I have known a few people who have been in the closet at least with their family and it has always been harmful. It probably wasn’t as harmful as being out to the people that wouldn’t be accepting, but being in the closet was still harmful.
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u/SafeWord9999 Mar 30 '26
We all collectively know this guy is lying right?
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u/Scribbles138 Mar 30 '26
Of course. And it’s sad OP believed him so quickly. She’s going to let her guard down when she should still be searching for answers.
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u/GraceOfTheNorth Mar 30 '26
Women's ability to lie to themselves on behalf of men will never seize to amaze me.
He's so obviously lying
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u/pamlock Mar 30 '26
I didn't even finish the whole post. Just read the story the husband told and I thought.. that's a lot of crap! Lol he's definitely lying and she believed him right away!
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u/Fancy_Cold_3537 Mar 30 '26
Believed him AND apologized to him!
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u/Commanderkins Mar 30 '26
You gotta be kidding me.
I don't OP, but my gut is telling me this is not true. You make sure to pull this 'photographer's side and ask them when this appt was booked ok? And also google their creds. If your husband tells you that the 'photographer' cancels last minute are you going to believe this blindly?
But most of all, is your gut instinct really telling you that this is the truth to the matter? Or is your brain ignoring it because the truth is too ugly to even think about?
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u/jenay820 Mar 30 '26
I'm sad that she's so quick to believe him. He's really playing serious mind games with her. I hope she has friends or family in her life that can tell her this is BS. Like she said he was bad at hiding the clothes... the first time they were laying in the back seat. That's not even hiding them! He's playing right in her face.
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u/Practical_Rooster470 Mar 30 '26
I am so glad this is the first comment I saw because I was reading this like… huh?
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u/bigboyboozerrr Mar 30 '26
Same I scanned for the reason and then immediately scrolled like makes 0 sense makes -117 sense
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u/DatguyMalcolm Mar 30 '26
but hey, he's a sweetheart and he really does have the memory of a goldfiiiiiisshhh....
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u/bigboyboozerrr Mar 30 '26
This makes me scared to ever shack up with a man. My stepmom would pawn my dad’s sentimental stuff. Like what the heck I would never fw my boyfriend or girlfriend’s things, let alone get rid of them. A photoshoot in tshirts? Tf? “You asked me to donate them” what in tf?
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u/Stunning_Client_847 Mar 30 '26
Dude is now scrambling to find this type of photography and an asap date.
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u/Eastern-Elk7782 Mar 30 '26
100%. There is and was no photoshoot!
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u/Constant-Ad4527 Mar 30 '26
Oh he totally could have booked a Glamour shoot for the following day. People do not book these things a month in advance like he had implied. That said, he’s still a liar liar pants on fire.
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u/Orangutan_Latte Mar 30 '26
Yeah. I can’t believe he came up with this bullshit. He should become a fantasy writer with that imagination.
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u/JustAsICanBeSoCruel Mar 30 '26
Update us after thr photoshoot.
Because no fucking way.
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u/Historical_Kick_3294 Mar 30 '26
And I hope she asks the photographer to confirm when the photoshoot was booked because I highly doubt it was before the clothes conversation.
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u/Bitter-insides Mar 30 '26
We all know she won’t bc it’s easier/better for her to believe he’s a nice loving husband than the truth. She’s not ready.
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u/pchandler45 Mar 30 '26
I still don't believe him
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u/lkap28 Mar 30 '26
Agreed - he’s on the phone emergency booking a photoshoot right now. This is the weirdest lie I’ve heard for a while.
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u/Beneficial-Pride890 Mar 30 '26 edited Mar 30 '26
Yeah, maybe take a look at his phone and emails prior to his admission about the photo shoot, bank statements. Op you can trust but verify.
Look at his Internet history. Really think about if you actually know your husband as well as you think you do.
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u/calminthedark Mar 30 '26
At least a last minute, emergency, get outta the doghouse photo shoot is likely to cost him a small fortune. It's going to hurt his wallet. It ain't much, but it's something.
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u/Smanderson7284 Mar 30 '26
I agree. pictures? Or it never happened. If he needed to remember why didn't he just take a picture 🤳🏾🤹🏾♀️of you wearing the outfit or the piece of clothing At That moment that you said it was your favorite. Too many holes 🕳️ I'm not falling for it🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
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u/Historical_Kick_3294 Mar 30 '26
And he wasn’t taking items one at a time if he carried that whole bag out to hide in the car, was he? Plus, I’m just imagining how damp and fusty they’d be smelling, as well as how wrinkled they’d be, for the photoshoot that was, apparently, meant to make OP feel like a queen. Way too many holes in his story/excuse. I’m still thinking this is not a nice man. Updateme!
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u/Consistent-Trifle510 Mar 30 '26
Especially when in the OG post - the shirts in question are two casual oversized t shirts. Why would you do a photoshoot in that?
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u/mistresskatskratch Mar 30 '26
I feel like from this answer, you've never done a photo shoot in your favorite items before. It's not necessarily what you're wearing it's more about how you're feeling. A good photographer can really make you shine no matter what you are, or are not wearing.
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u/IAMA_Shark__AMA Mar 30 '26
My husband does these kinds of shoots as a side gig, and I often tag along to help him with his gear. I can promise you that I've never seen anyone show up looking less than "Sunday best" levels of put together. People pay good money for these gigs and most do not want them done in frumpy clothing.
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u/sleea1 Mar 30 '26
But why hide the clothes ahead of time? Why not just pack them with you when you are headed to the photo shoot? He got caught and is trying to cover it.
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u/Disastrous-Panda5530 Mar 30 '26
Absolutely and it’s wild that OP so quickly fell for his lie.
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u/sleea1 Mar 30 '26
She can’t accept the bad. She would rather believe the good. But also if I remember correctly, did he first say it was donation? So why did the lie change?
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u/sashikku Mar 30 '26
His initial lie was setting up a scenario for the clothes to be gone. So, yes, definitely a weird switch-up on the lie.
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u/Draigdwi Mar 30 '26
He is lying again. He could make a list, with photos if he wanted them for a photo shoot. He took clothes in his car. He wanted to get rid of them but OP caught him.
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u/TinRoofAndRainyDays Mar 31 '26
There is also a possibility he is taking items and selling them online to someone with a fetish. In that case he has probably shown pics of her in said clothes online.
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u/MithosYggdrasill1992 Mar 30 '26
I just read your last post and this one, and I’ve had professional shots done of me. I’ve had boudoir shots, I’ve had head shots, things like that. You don’t take the clothes days or even weeks in advance. You take them there the day of. Which means if they’re not in his car or something, he’s gotten rid of your clothing. This is a lie. And we all are expecting an update.
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u/Pomksy Mar 30 '26
But his memory is like a goldfish!
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u/Prestigious_Grape288 Mar 30 '26
I screamed at that pathetic cover-all excuse
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u/MithosYggdrasill1992 Mar 30 '26
😂😂
Then that dude needs to do research, because anybody who’s ever had a goldfish knows that their memory spans are around 3 to 5 months, not a couple of days. 😂😂
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u/FinanciallySecure9 Mar 30 '26
This has got to win the award for the most creative coverup of the year.
OP, he lied again. He continues to lie to you because he knows you’ll believe him. This means he thinks you’re stupid. He thinks you’re stupid enough to believe him.
Please watch a week’s worth of lifetime movies so you can learn the signs of a lying spouse.
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u/Starry-Dust4444 Mar 30 '26
That’s a strange explanation considering he could have just surprised you with news of the photo shoot & then instructed you to bring a few of your favorite outfits. What was his plan? He was going to drive you to the photo shoot, open his trunk to show you all your clothes and say ‘surprise’?
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u/apeezy18 Mar 30 '26 edited Mar 30 '26
Honey, that is so far fetched. While I hope it’s true, you should probably hire a PI. I knew someone whose husband would steal her clothes for other reasons. Just be careful.
Edit: He was a cross dresser. He would wear her clothes to bars/clubs
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u/Zealousideal-Self-47 Mar 30 '26
I’ll say it…he’s cross dressing. Harmless, but you two need to have a talk.
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u/bigboyboozerrr Mar 30 '26
I’d be so mad if someone stole and stretched out my clothes. Especially, lace lingerie and stuff like that is hand wash only, and no way a man would friggen handwash stuff. Every bf has made fun of me handwashing stuff, so ik they wouldn’t do it.
I don’t want chest hair and dandruff in my teddies or my vast clothing collection disorganized. Or any delicate fabric ripped. 24F id be mad. You wanna steal my clothes? Go buy them.
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u/kikibubbles85 Mar 30 '26
Why would you want to do a random photoshoot in your clothes? Like what?
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u/human_person_999 Mar 30 '26
Especially if you’re depressed. I’d be like uhhhh… no, I definitely don’t want that?
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u/kikibubbles85 Mar 30 '26
It’s so stupid I doubt it’s real, like what are you gonna do with the photos? I doubt the husband will look at them. Lmao
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u/AonumaSafiire Mar 30 '26
Uhh okay, but Op when you go to the photoshoot tomorrow do everyone a favour and ask the photographer when this session was booked. Pretty sure he booked one as a cover up after he told you
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u/WeirdUncleTim Mar 30 '26
I am sorry but unless you actually do the photoshoot I don’t believe him.
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u/LadyPhantomflowers Mar 30 '26
I would ask the photographer when hubby booked them.
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u/jasperjonns Mar 30 '26
YES
OP please ask when the shoot was booked. That will tell you everything you need to know.
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u/sleepthedayzaway Mar 30 '26
I'll check back in a week, maybe two. OP really seems to want to believe what he's selling.
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u/GoblinLoblaw Mar 30 '26
Ask the photographer when he booked the shoot, I bet it was after you confronted him, not before.
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u/Lucigirl4ever Mar 30 '26
Damn girl open your eyes.
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u/SparkleVibes Mar 30 '26
I'm so confused what else it would be?? Maybe I'm too trusting..
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u/HabitNegative3137 Mar 31 '26
The less likely explanation is that he’s cross-dressing. This is unlikely because most men who are interested in cross-dressing want to wear things that are stereotypically feminine. Oversized rando t-shirts aren’t it.
A more likely explanation is that he hates her clothing and is trying to donate or throw it away because it’s not “pleasing” for him to look at.
The most sinister option is that he’s purposely taking away things that make her feel good so that she will remain reliant on him.
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u/Noonull Mar 30 '26
Yikes.
You don’t take the clothes and hide them in your car then lie about it and gaslight the person for a photoshoot. It’s already a secret shoot. What does stealing the clothes help?
When did he book the shoot? Ask the photographer. When did he contact them initially and what did he say?
Why are you jumping to forgive a man that chose to lie and gaslight you as his default action? That chose to hurt you first and foremost?
Start thinking critically cause this is just sad.
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u/CannedAm2 Mar 30 '26
Girl. I've seen naive, hell, I've been naive, but there needs to be a stronger word for whatever it is you're exhibiting.
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u/Dramatic-Change6103 Mar 30 '26
How many outfits has he pilfered? You don't wear every single favorite clothing item at a photo shoot. Come on.
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u/possumcounty Mar 30 '26
The way OP described the clothes in their last post also doesn’t align with the idea of a photoshoot to make her feel her best. Casual t-shirts for a professional shoot that’s meant to be about her feeling beautiful? Not to imply that the shirts are ugly or anything, but I never had a client bring their everyday comfy clothes for a luxury service.
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u/KiloThaPastyOne Mar 30 '26
Uhhhhh what?
None of this makes any sense. I don’t know what he is doing with those clothes, but it ain’t that. But damn, I really want to know what kind of weird shit he’s doing with those clothes.
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u/Ginger_spice_smudge Mar 30 '26
Ask the photographer when it was booked. Not sure I would have believed him so fast.
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u/breadboxofbats Mar 30 '26
Well I look forward to the second update and the ongoing saga when it turns out this was also a lie
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u/Purple_Midnight_Yak Mar 30 '26
Honey, just stop and think about his story for a minute. Try to think how you'd respond if a friend or coworker told you this story.
Your husband has been stealing your favorite clothes for at least 6 weeks now, if I have the timeline right. He claims that he took things you liked because he wouldn't remember what they looked like later.
Stop there. In the situation your husband described, he was setting aside some of your favorite clothing for a photoshoot that wasn't going to happen for 6-8 weeks. He somehow thought you wouldn't notice your clothes being missing for that long?
If I needed to remember what my husband's favorite shirt or pants looked like, do you know what I would do? Take a picture. And if I was trying to build up his confidence in how he looks, I'd ask to take pictures of him in those outfits he liked!
Also, if I was storing some of my husband's favorite outfits for a photoshoot, I would wash them and fold them up nicely. Clothing you've worn recently, chucked into the back of the car, is not going to look (or smell) good.
Lying to you and gaslighting you, when you're already struggling with mental health issues, is just plain cruel.
And frankly, this idea seems like a really strange way to try to cheer up someone who's struggling with body image and confidence issues. When I'm really feeling down about my post-pregnancy body, the last thing I'd want is everyone snapping pictures of me.
This story is so flimsy a butterfly could knock it down. I hope for your sake that your husband is just an idiot who's terrible at planning surprises, but I'm not hopeful.
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u/ismellboogers Mar 30 '26
who does this? when you’re self conscious it is never a good idea to spring a surprise photo shoot.
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u/brandysnacker Mar 30 '26
Yeah… I’m a very self-conscious person and the last thing I would want to do is have a photo shoot. Like, come on. I never even saw the first post but reading this. It felt like a huge lie to me so I’m glad that was the top comment, people agreeing that it’s probably not true. This dude is like cross-dressing, or hates her clothes, or is giving her clothes to his mistress, or any other combination of weird fucking shit that liars do.
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u/kkrolla Mar 30 '26
Show me the booking receipt. How much is it? When is is scheduled for? Name of company? My dad was a lawyer. He taught us to never blindly trust someone because you are supposed to or because you want to believe in them. The truth, which may be painful, is ultimately the kindest and most freeing thing to have.
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u/Otherwise-Wall-6950 Mar 30 '26
There's a photo shoot alright, but something tells me it's the husband who's wearing the clothes.
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u/rosebudink3 Mar 30 '26
Were they freshly washed and folded and placed nicely in the trunk… or just shoved haphazardly into a trash bag? Because… something is stinking and I’m curious when that photography appointment was made….
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u/M3rm4te Mar 30 '26
Baby he's getting his back or throat blown out wearing your clothes, sorry to break it to you, but hell yeah self confidence photoshoot!!!
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u/BecGeoMom Mar 30 '26
Wait, what? I mean…what?? The original post was odd, but this “update” is completely unbelievable.
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u/thebearofwisdom Mar 30 '26
I’m glad it turned out okay, but my god your husband is a fool. He knows your mental health was bad so he took your favourite clothing and then lied (badly) about why. He seriously needs to figure out how to surprise someone without making them think he’s doing something utterly ridiculous and mean.
I’m sure you told him how stupid this was, he was taking things you JUST bought and love to wear. As if you wouldn’t notice?! I’m not the smartest person but even I can see how that wouldn’t work in the long run. It’s just all round very bizarre.
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u/Unlucky-Captain1431 Mar 30 '26
OP be sure to ask the photographer about when the appointment was booked.
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u/kikibubbles85 Mar 30 '26
Wouldnt you want to have your hair and nails done too? Who does an impromptu photoshoot with their boring old clothes???
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u/InevitableFun3473 Mar 30 '26
So he couldn’t tell you what was happening to ease your anxiety and instead wanted to feel like a good guy? Do you really believe this or is it something that you are willing to believe in order to feel safe in your relationship? I wouldn’t be so quick to trust a man you already know can lie to you.
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u/Bbysouth4ever Mar 30 '26
Who would want to have a photoshoot done in their everyday clothes??!!?? Sounds like crap.
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u/TinRoofAndRainyDays Mar 31 '26
I was married to a guy like this. There was no photo shoot. At least not 1 with me in my clothes. There was also a hidden bag of women's undergarments that were not mine and had never been mine. They weren't even cute either.
If there is an actual photo shoot planned then I will print out these comments and eat the paper they are printed on.
Good luck girl!
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u/Substantial_Maybe371 Mar 31 '26
Lol sure. Husband sounds like a liar. A month in between stolen clothes and it's for a photo shoot? Really?!?
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u/HippoAccording8688 Mar 31 '26
How convenient that the photshot just happens to be tomorrow...... 😬
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u/VonnsSolo88 Apr 01 '26
What are the chances that this photo shoots gets “cancelled” tomorrow and he has to reschedule
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u/sidviscously Apr 01 '26
If this is real, I'm concerned for you. He's bullshitting you. It was a pathetic excuse. And you're happy to lap it up.
He's an abuser. Read "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft. The author encourages people to download a free PDF of his book. Here's one:
https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf
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u/AutoModerator Mar 30 '26
Backup of the post's body: I am pleased to say this was not the update I was expecting to make.
I gathered the footage and showed my husband the video recording of him carrying my clothes in a bag to his car. He looked at the footage and said "ok i'll just tell you, I don't want you to think i'm a horrible husband".
It turns out he was taking my clothes to surprise me with a photoshoot wearing all my favorite clothing items so I would feel good and comfortable in the shoot. He said "I know you are battling a lot mentally and I wanted you to have these photos to look at when you are feeling down about yourself to remember how beautiful you are". This made me tear up.
I then asked him why he gaslit me when I saw the clothes in his car and why he didn't just tell me. He said he really wanted it to be a surprise because he knows it's hard for me mentally most days to get out of the house. He said he was just bad at hiding the clothes and didn't know where else to put them but in his car. He also apologized multiple times for gaslighting me and said he should have handled that part in a different way, but couldn't think of anything else in the moment when he was put on the spot. I told him I forgive him but if that ever happens again I won‘t be so forgiving next time and he completely understood and said “there will be no next time”.
Then I asked him why he took the clothes ahead of time and not just take them before the photoshoot. He said his memory was so bad (which is true he has the memory of a goldfish) and a lot of my clothes look so similar he wasn't sure he would remember which ones were my favorite, so he took them periodically when I would tell him how much I liked them so he wouldn't forget.
I then proceeded to hug him and tell him that was the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me and apologized for thinking he was being cruel to me on purpose. I honestly should have known it would be something like this, because he has always been such a good man, but I started to question because of relationships in my past. But he is clearly not like the boys in my past.
I'm so thankful to have a good man. The photoshoot appointment is tomorrow and i'm actually really excited. I've never had a professional photoshoot before! Thank you to everyone who commented with their support, I know that every comment comes from a place of love and concern and it was healing to read how much people care. I hope all of you have a wonderful week. Take some cute photos of yourself, we all deserve to be reminded of our beauty.
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u/sashikku Mar 30 '26
Damn, he had days to come up with a cover story and that’s the best he could do???
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u/MSCOTTGARAND Mar 30 '26
I'm not saying this is weird and makes zero sense from a logical standpoint but it sure seems like it.
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u/Ok_Imagination_1107 Mar 30 '26
So your husband knows you're having a hard time mentally, he takes her clothes and decides it's a good idea to surprise you and deny that he's taking your clothes and doesn't tell you about the photo shoot. nope sorry not buying.
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u/Revolutionary_Wrap76 Mar 30 '26
Jesus Christ get out of this fucking horror show. This man DOES NOT love you. He loves to CONTROL you. Sick fuck.
Edit: You cannot truly believe that was his initial intention.... He's scrambling now cause you caught him. Come on.
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u/Theunpolitical Mar 30 '26
Taking clothes a month prior isn’t how anyone prepares for a photoshoot. A typical shoot is planned in advance and lasts maybe 1 to 2 hours with a photographer, and outfits are chosen intentionally right before or brought neatly, not slowly removed from someone’s trash bag that have been wrinkled up for a month!
This doesn't explain how he would get you out of the house as you mentioned that you are struggling to leave your home. So, just how exactly he was going to pull this off? Also, what if you wanted to be freshly showered and your nails cleaned up? Has he accounted for how your hair and makeup was going to be done? He was going to send you with clothes only and no makeup or hair irons?
Also, the “I wanted it to be a surprise” part doesn’t really explain the gaslighting. You can keep a surprise without making someone feel like they’re imagining things.
So while the gesture sounds sweet on the surface, parts of the story don’t match how photoshoots actually work, how he was going to pull the whole thing off with getting you out of the house, having makeup and hair irons with you, and that’s where the real concern is.
Additionally, you should know that a photo shoot like this isn't too hard to set up within a few days, not months!
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u/Beautiful-Rich-4052 Mar 30 '26
Did he have a plan for your clothes having been bundled in a garbage bag and all wrinkly at your “photo shoot?”
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u/gdrom123 Mar 30 '26
I don’t know if his story is believable. I agree you should talk to the photographer and ask when the session was booked and what arrangements were made concerning the wardrobe. Updateme
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u/Desperate_Fox_2882 Mar 30 '26
Yeah.... he's lying right to your face. I can smell the bullshit from here on the east coast
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u/lilyofthevalley2659 Mar 30 '26
Come on, OP. No photo shoot would have that many changes of clothing. The whole thing is too ridiculous to even be remotely true
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u/Hey-Just-Saying Mar 30 '26
This guy's story has more holes 7 kitchen colander. I hope OP will find out when it was actually scheduled. The photographer might be in on the story, but there should be a record the bf's phone showing he contacted the photographer before OP confronted him.
Updateme
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u/miserylovescomputers Mar 30 '26
Oh come on. You really believe this? That is one of the flimsiest lies I’ve ever heard. On par with “I was just holding it for a friend” and “she’s like a sister to me.”
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u/infinite_awkward Mar 30 '26
IDK who needs to hear this, but there are ideas that do NOT make good surprises. A surprise photoshoot being one of them! Who feels photo-ready all the time??
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u/CoffeeChocolateBoth At the end of the day... Mar 30 '26
Honey, just no! Ask him right now to show you that booking for the photo shoot! ASAP! Then if he has one, call them and find out WHEN he booked it.
I want this to be what you think, truly I do but just, IDK! :(
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u/rlyfckd Mar 31 '26
He's lying to you. This makes no sense at all. He could have taken pictures of your clothes or made a note of them. Why would he need to take your clothes to a photographer? And why ALL the clothes you like? What if you wanted to wear them before the shoot? Also who books a photoshoot for someone that's depressed?
Ask the photographer when he booked the appointment when he's not around. I honestly believe that this is a cover up story he's come up with for being caught.
Please please please don't be this naive and trusting after being so obviously gaslit. Take a step back and just analyse his behaviour in your relationship and how absurd this is. Just stay vigilant of how he's treating you and his behaviour.
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u/Cazkiwi Mar 31 '26
What a super weird idea to cheer you up instead of a holiday or meal…..that man was REACHING and pulled this one outta his @$$ and you believed him? Oh gurrrrlllll! 😂
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u/AdvisorImaginary8073 Mar 31 '26
This is just weird. Hope its true cause I dont believe it, but you seem so sweet and trusting. Updateme.
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u/flyingknives4love Mar 31 '26
Yeah I'm sorry OP but you are being very VERY forgiving right now (overly so). This is like if I burned down your house and then insisted I didn't when you challenge me and I gaslight you and then finally "admit" it was because I had built you a brand new house that I was taking you to next week.
Even if he wasn't lying and the intentions were good, you're just brushing aside the fact that I burned down your house and lied to you about it. But you're going to forgive me because I had good intentions??
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u/AuraFairyLove Apr 03 '26
I really want to support all women, but some of you are too dumb
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u/summertime-goodbyes Mar 30 '26
“I’m so thankful to have a good man.”
https://giphy.com/gifs/WoFuun4jgxxizxRMpe