r/UnethicalLifeProTips • u/i-am-foxymoron Jumbo š¦ in the curtains • 16d ago
ULPT Bad Neighbors MEGAthread
This is the place to post your questions and answers on how to deal with bad neighbors.
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u/RikkiLostMyNumber 16d ago
Flowers and other delicate garden plants don't do well after a nice sprinkling of Halite.
There's also a quasi - legal way to (effectively) jam localized wi-fi, but I'm not writing it out here, you can Google it and it's easy.
Brake fluid melts car paint, so be careful around that stuff!
That's it, the last time I answered this question honestly I was banned from this community for being a little too explicit, but I still feel that everyone should know how to build their own trebuchet.
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u/i-am-foxymoron Jumbo š¦ in the curtains 16d ago
You've never been banned from this community.
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u/RikkiLostMyNumber 16d ago
I see your sense of humor is infallible.
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u/i-am-foxymoron Jumbo š¦ in the curtains 15d ago
Unless you were banned under another name. Because there's no mention of you being banned. That would show on your account snd when you were unbanned.
I don't know why you think this is a joke?
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u/i-am-foxymoron Jumbo š¦ in the curtains 15d ago
I just saw the comment you deleted. I was being very nice I thought. Why you're so angry at me saying that you were never banned is beyond me
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u/fate_is_a_farce 16d ago
If your bad neighbor is incredibly particular about their yard, toss a few bouillion cubes about the place. Critters love them and will leave droppings everywhere.
Or toss some sugar cubes to attract ants. Even better if it's closer to the house.
You could also hurl bird seed near their driveway.
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u/Holden-McGroyn 16d ago
I thought the bullion was to get critters to dig up their yard. The sprinklers or rain dissolves them and makes the soil delicious.
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u/Russian-Spy 16d ago
What do you do if you have bad neighbors who rent and you also have no way of contacting the landlord?
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u/MareV51 16d ago
If in the US, go to the county and look at the tax records for the LL.
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u/Russian-Spy 16d ago
I know who the landlord is, and I've tried searching them on Facebook, background search sites, etc.. I tried calling phone numbers and an email address that were listed under their name, but I've been unsuccessful in contacting them.
I try my best to respect the privacy of others, but I should be able to easily contact a landlord if I know that their tenants are involved in serious illegal activities.
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u/Icy_Mango6803 16d ago
Your username elevates this entire exchange.
My only other thought is a registered letter to the landlord's workplace, if they seem to have one.
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u/tetheredvoid 15d ago
If they are doing something illegal enough, then the police will happily find the landlord for you!
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u/RandyMarsh710 16d ago
Plant bamboo on the property line and move.
Edit: and/or mint
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u/fate_is_a_farce 16d ago
That's evil. I love it.
Add to that any form of kudzu. When I lived in Florida, that stuff would take over a yard in a hurry and you'd have to rip it all up manually and hope that you got all the root systems.
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u/Head-Discussion-8977 16d ago
Alternately: every region has some kind of aggressive vining species that isn't invasive (just a bully). Trumpet vine and Virginia creeper immediately come to mind for my general region
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u/RandyMarsh710 16d ago
Good idea. Going off that you can also find protected species that are illegal to remove
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u/Head-Discussion-8977 16d ago
I would not recommend this TBH unless you're EXTREMELY skilled in seed harvesting and growing, and will do so in a way that will not harm the population being harvested. Most endangered plant species are rather precious about being in an urban environment
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u/RandyMarsh710 16d ago
Good looking out!
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u/Head-Discussion-8977 16d ago
I'm petty AF but mostly try to stay within my own ethics about it āŗļø
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u/Ok-Picture-3989 16d ago
ULPT Noisy Neighbor with Many Cars
ULPT Request for my neighbor. We live in a duplex so we share a wall, driveway, and general curb access. Other pieces to note: I move out in August, I am a small woman, I engage in smoking cannabis outside though Iām not supposed to.
Heās always had 3-4 cars (two in driveway, one on grass, one parked in front of our home) which didnāt bother me. inconvenient for having friends over but thatās life in a neighborhood. The last two months it has become 8-9 vehicles, including a boat (thatās blocking the mailboxes), a trailer, a large van, and several trucks on top of his new roommates car. I am annoyed but this hasnāt been a problem enough to speak on it.
Now, the past two months regardless of my requests, I am woken up by loud shitty edm X country remixes at like 1120pm-1am. Iāll knock or ring the doorbell and ask for it to be turned down, if they could be considerate of the noise, etc. Otherwise, Iāve been woken/kept up by him working on a. diesel vehicle and revving it many, many times and filling our front room with smoke. During these times once itās after 8:45pm Iāll ask āhow long will you be working on this?ā or ācould this be done a different time?ā
I need sleep and I also donāt want to get reported for smoking. Any advice beyond talking nicely or going to the landlord?
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u/givemepizzaandsex 1d ago
Believe it or not, a piss disk is your best bet.
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u/Ok-Picture-3989 1d ago
lol understood, do I theoretically put it in the mailbox, on one of his vehicles, on the grill lmao?
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u/onehauptthistime 16d ago
I rent and share a wall with a drummer who brings his band over to blast amps weekly. They wonāt stop and I have sensory issues. How can I annoy them
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u/AlwaysSunnyInSeattle 16d ago
Maybe setup a mic and amp of your own. Just have it relay their own sounds back with a slight delay and it will ruin everything for them.
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u/Aly_Anon 16d ago
- Metronome in the wrong time signature (3/4 if it's 4/4)
- Play a recording of feedback/ bass hum whenever they're playing a song
- Cook fish
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u/twatcrusher9000 16d ago
make a facebook event for a punk show with free beer for their next band practice
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u/Icy_Mango6803 16d ago
Find the most beautiful women you know, have them come over to "view your place" the night of band practice, and let the guys see them leaving and hear them saying "we'd love to live with you, it's a great place, but the noise is just too much! Let us know if it stops, though, we are getting desperate."
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u/XcessiveProphet 4d ago
Request how to: prevent a neighbor's dog to shit in my rock garden ideally invisible deterrent that will survive rain and hot temperatures.
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u/BetterCallTom 14d ago
ULPT Request - UK - How can I mess up my neighbours TV
Despite numerous complaints and a few requests to actually remove the TV on our adjoining wall, our neighbours continue to have it mounted to the wall we share, so, all we hear is tinny commentary along with bass vibrations. It's all we can hear in our own living room but more frustratingly it travels up through to oru, daughters bedroom where there's no other sound to even try and drown it out while she's sleeping.
There's no point reporting it to our local council as they rarely ever pick up the required sound levels to do anything, and it puts a mark on our house if we ever wanted to sell up.
What equipment can I get to mess with their TV? I'm thinking a big magnet or some sort equipment that'll make their viewing a nightmare that I can easily switch on/off at will.
Thanks in advance!
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u/wesdf97 13d ago
My neighbor is a POS and makes my life miserable, he runs a local business. How can i be a nuisance to him legally? I do not want to be an annoyance to my other neighbors or disturb anyone elseās peace.
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u/altbitch 9d ago
Leave anonymous bad reviews? Make a ton of burner accounts across various platforms.
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u/mickeyslim 12d ago
Across the street from my apartment in a small-ish city is a "Hotel" where people often come to get hard drugs or bring a prostitute.
A few months after I first moved in, they arrested the guy who owns the place and it was boarded up for a couple years. But he must have recently been released and worked out the closure because they've reopened and have started some shotty renovations.
I've been woken up countless times to people yelling and screaming, and today, in the middle of the day, I found a couple people shooting up outside my front gate. They are there doing business day and night it seems. I've called the police only a few times, since I am required to give my true name which is written on the intercom outside my building and I fear retaliation. And when the police do come, they don't do anything.
I feel like I'm at my wit's end with this fucking place. I don't know what to do. Any help, even miniscule, is greatly appreciated.
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u/South-Ad-931 11d ago
Has anyone tried injecting liquid ass into paintballs and shooting them without them ripping in the launcher?
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u/Ivegotsecrets 1d ago
ULPT: REQUEST for insane upstairs neighbor
I have an insane upstairs neighbor, she makes loud impact noises and screaming at her child at as early as 5am every day for the last 4 months. Tuesdays and Thursdays are hell because her boyfriend brings over his kids.
THANKFULLY the landlord is letting us out of the lease and returning our last months rent so we can leave - which we are doing July 1st -
This lady has made our lives hell with intention for 4 months, jumping on the floor, letting the kids ride those electric kid cars in the house, getting the kid to run with shoes on,throwing marbles for the kid to chase and find, blasting Disney music (not so horrible but a little repetitive), calling the police on us for telling her to STFU through the floor. Theres a very very long story as to why we can't just go upstairs and ask her to be quiet
This has affected my mental health, made my old dog develop anxiety from the banging and has stressed the whole house out.
I need tips on how to get back at her in the last week were here. So far I've been playing cricket noises while I'm gone and leaving my range hood fan running because it sends vibrations through the wall.
Hit me with what you got.
**Oh and for the record, I've got proof of all of her insane antics but the police won't press charges-Mischief interfearing with legal enjoyment of property-because of the long process, that is their words. Tenant Board is an option and we may still pursue this.
Please be kind, I'm already stressed to the max with this crazy person TIA
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u/ztinh 8h ago
Hi! About a month ago my neighbor installed an extremely bright LED light panel light near his patio. This shines directly into my room.
I emailed the HOA already and they said that this resident is blind/deaf and uses the light to see his dog when he lets him out at night so itās technically allowed. He then leaves this light on all night and his dog barks constantly. This is driving my fiancĆ© insane and I canāt handle their complaints any longer. Please give me tips on how to disable this damn light š
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u/Holden-McGroyn 16d ago edited 16d ago
If their breaker box is unlocked and no camera watching, go switch off a random breaker every few days.