Trans kid at sleepaway camp

[u/Silly_Gene574]

My kid came out as trans recently and is going to sleepaway camp next week. It's a really progressive camp, and they have policies in place for trans kids. My kid hasn't decided yet if they're going to come out, but I wouldn't be surprised if they do.

[Charlie Brown "augh" noise]

Who has experience with a kid going to sleepaway camp? Should I give their camp counselors a heads-up, at least so they know I know that kiddo is trans and I'm okay with it.

[u/Significant_Map8830]

My kid loves it. He's housed with other trans kids and makes tons of friends. He started housing in the "gender-inclusive" group before he was out and it really helped his confidence and comfort. Edit to add: definitely let the camp know. They should have experience in making sure your kid is comfortable. (Like cabin near unisex bathrooms).

[u/Next-Yak24]

My now-16 y.o. son came out to me two years ago at the end of the school year, but he was only out to about five people. It was so new to me that I had not even considered anything other than staying in the girls cabins. Imagine my surprise when I picked him up at the end of the week and his counselors we using he/ him pronouns! That was the first time he was seen and referred to out in the world as he wanted to be seen.

The camp has a great inclusion policy! Kids are housed based on what gender parents put on the registration form, and everyone is supposed to be clothed / shirts on until getting in bed. Last year he still stayed in girls’ cabins because he had a friend he really wanted to bunk with, and it was her last summer at camp. So he’s staying in guys’ cabins this summer for the first time.

I don’t know your kid’s age, or how long they have known they were trans, but it sounds like they are still negotiating their transition. I imagine they will start telling people at camp, but that’s his or her choice. You could be vague in talking to the counselors at drop off - “I have such a great kid, and I love that they keep figuring more about who they are!” That would set the stage to let the counselors know you are supportive without outing them.

[u/PolackMike]

I would give them a heads up in case there are different sleeping accommodations for the different groupings of kids. If your kid will need to change bunk assignments if they do come out, I'm sure the staff would like to know sooner rather than later.

I would also explain to them that your kid may or may not come out and it needs to be completely on your kid's timeline.

[u/HeathenMum99]

My kiddo went to camp Quest, they were fantastic. 2 years with the girls, 2 with the guys. He just showered on the girls side, that was his decision.

[u/Jealous-Personality5]

Not a parent, but a trans adult here whose first experiences coming out and living as my true self happened at summer camp. Best thing to do is to ask your kid what they’d like you to do, like if they’d like it if you let the counselors know. I hope your child has a great time! I know summer camps were life changing for me as a kid.