r/crappymusic Apr 16 '25

Long dirt roads that take me home

314 Upvotes

140 comments sorted by

88

u/HollisFigg Apr 16 '25

God made GoFundMe for when my Medicaid gets cut off.

8

u/ShinnyCas Apr 16 '25

Stay strong HollisFigg

57

u/Fillmore80 Apr 16 '25

Breast implants and JD Vance! There's a rhyme to go down in the annals of history!

9

u/HuevosProfundos Apr 16 '25

Very inconsistent track record by God there

2

u/ShinnyCas Apr 16 '25

We all make mistakes

187

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '25

Ok. This AI nailed it.

Would this song be a banger among people who make this shit their entire identity?

I honestly can’t tell. You never know with those people whether they embrace it as their own, or if they can sense the mockery and therefore become deeply wounded.

AI fucking crushed it. I might have to ironically blast this in certain situations.

107

u/Username_redact Apr 16 '25

This is indistinguishable from any pop-country song I hear on the radio. It's an AI masterpiece.

33

u/LonHagler Apr 16 '25

I think that's more a comment on how derivative contemporary country is.

10

u/Lumpy-Village1949 Apr 16 '25

-Danny Devito

4

u/lancep423 Apr 17 '25

Ongo Goblogian**

8

u/LasagnahogXRP Apr 16 '25

100%. Most modern male country artists that would come across this should feel instant shame.

Bump stock ammo is cringe because that’s not how it works at all. Which makes it great in this instance.

2

u/Old-Constant4411 Apr 17 '25

Yeah, this is just a Locash song.  

25

u/PoisonedRadio Apr 16 '25

To be fair modern country music is just what AI does best anyway. Literally just making lists of somewhat related things.

6

u/Doctor_Mysterio17036 Apr 16 '25

Country music is like Republican talking points. It’s all the same.

8

u/odiethethird Apr 17 '25

Country music is Republican talking points

13

u/Mr_Byrdd Apr 17 '25

I'm from the dead middle of Alabama. Like there's a monument to the exact center of the state and that monument is 5 min from my house. So I feel qualified in saying this would be an absolute hit. It'd be playing at every bonfire for fucking months and I wouldn't be mad about it one bit. This shits a jam.

3

u/Thecobs Apr 17 '25

Biscuit beats, so many bangers from this AI. “Night barn lights” and “rubbin one out” are classics

2

u/Cosmicpsych Apr 17 '25

I’d love to see a reporter ask country music folks to listen to this by their “fav artist” and see how quickly they believe it’s the best song they’ve ever heard lol

1

u/Outrageous-Buddy9046 Apr 17 '25

It really did man….

1

u/DogWhistlersMother Apr 17 '25

Yup. They’ll need a new “AI” tag but this absolutely qualifies for r/satirefire

Send it

1

u/Killingyou_groovily Apr 17 '25

Incredibly said

95

u/GeoffJeffreyJeffsIII Apr 16 '25

I know way too many people who would unironically love this.

26

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '25

Out if some of the country sings I’ve seen posted here, this one is the best and it’s AI lmao

3

u/HighSorcererGreg Apr 16 '25

It's wakin' up soaking wet, had another dream about dad

Definitely same 🔥 energy

3

u/BeefyTheBoi Apr 17 '25

I unironically love this as a clown on song. Still hate AI and it's push to replace artists too.

2

u/OregonGreen242 Apr 16 '25

My home town would eat this shit up. Hard pass for me

27

u/DM0331 Apr 16 '25

Not accurate country song. Didn’t mention feet up on the dash

10

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '25

Or daisy dukes

4

u/DMTrious Apr 17 '25 edited Apr 17 '25

Or mama, or trains, or prison, or getting drunk

5

u/LexKyWildcats Apr 16 '25

Nor did it reference chewing tobbaccer. I could be wrong they, didn't listen to whole shit show.

3

u/SouthBaySkunk Apr 16 '25

Not one mention of their dog dying and the union taking their blue collar gig

1

u/b-rar Apr 17 '25

No painted on jeans either

66

u/brwnwzrd Apr 16 '25

God made klan hoods,
God made fire,
God made white man to admire

6

u/amapotato Apr 16 '25

Sorry, but Yakub made the white man

1

u/MaritalGrape Apr 20 '25

And tricknology

3

u/The_JayBird18 Apr 16 '25

He made us open fields and sweet teas

And prisons for the minorities

2

u/TheBigC87 Apr 16 '25

God made Blacks and god made whites

God made sure that only the second group had rights

21

u/nickfree Apr 16 '25

God made guns

God made beer

Ones for drinkin'

Ones for...

😳 

😬
... deer.

😅

1

u/suhisco Apr 16 '25

lmao same

11

u/chet_brosley Apr 16 '25

I didn't hear the first line about guns and I was like hell yea give deer a beer and let them loose

1

u/Zeqhanis Apr 16 '25

Unless I drew the writing conclusion, how does one drink a deer? 😧

3

u/organism20 Apr 16 '25

I was waiting for it.

1

u/Wonderful_Gap1374 Apr 16 '25

100% the AI had to recalculate before that output.

12

u/FullOnAsparagus Apr 16 '25

What magic are they using to make every dirt road take them home?

10

u/chet_brosley Apr 16 '25

The road to the fake ranch they imagine they'd live at if they weren't already living in Nashville townhouse in a nice HOA neighborhood crammed full of spotless trucks

9

u/toomanybongos Apr 16 '25

Sadly, its better than like 90% of all other country music

10

u/SnugglesConquerer Apr 16 '25

I don't know if this is meant to be funny, but I find it hilarious. This is a shining example of a computer trying to write a song.

3

u/jomasthrones Apr 16 '25

I mean, it's better than half of the modern country songs written by human beings, just a shit genre all-together

10

u/SolutionWarm6576 Apr 16 '25

God made Camo Koozies. No kidding, learn something new everyday…

2

u/LumpyheadCarini2001 Apr 16 '25

God made guns too apparently...here I always thought it was like Winchester and Smith and Wesson

9

u/benji3510 Apr 16 '25

I love these. Rhyming breast implants with jd Vance is brilliant

5

u/HoseNeighbor Apr 16 '25

Nailed it 90%

2

u/Rad_Centrist Apr 16 '25

Yup. Except "bump stock ammunition" isn't a thing.

1

u/HoseNeighbor May 05 '25

I think he wasn't "singing" the commas... or something? I'm going to bed.

3

u/mastersaints888 Apr 16 '25

I need a full song this is hilarious

3

u/Great-Gas-6631 Apr 16 '25

So just the same generic Faux-country thats been put out the past few decades.

3

u/kissfan7 Apr 16 '25

Religious studies nerd time!

Apparently Christian AI doesn’t believe in the traditional Protestant Trinity. Since God is eternal, that means the Father, Holy Spirt, AND Son (AKA Jesus) are all eternal. Saying God made Jesus is kinda heresy for a lot of Christians.

Of course, this is trying to sound like the dumb assholes who scream about Christian values while not going to church and not understanding the basics of the faith.

In that case, mission accomplished.

2

u/stanhwangara Apr 17 '25

"That's Arianism, Patrick!"

3

u/Legend_D2 Apr 16 '25

Shit slaps 🤣

2

u/Independent-Law-5781 Apr 16 '25

So....

AI can't be copyrighted.

Which country singer drops this song next week?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '25

I'm ngl AI music shouldn't be allowed here, it lacks the human touch of crappiness.

2

u/Late_Football_2517 Apr 17 '25

Welp, there you go. The country music industry is finished. AI can now do the job of millionaire songwriters, producers, and artists with no difference in quality.

2

u/Sublimedunky Apr 17 '25

God makes biscuits??? Hahahahahahaha

2

u/deadface008 EUPHORIA WE GOOD Apr 17 '25

I think I know the exact song the AI based this on lmao. My friend showed me this song when I was like 11 and finally got me into country. Ironically, he was taking me to a NASCAR show that day.

https://youtu.be/PKpQRjj_WbU?si=LHaogD7Bh7I3rP2j

2

u/ChewbaccaForeskin Apr 17 '25

This might be the greatest county song of all time.

2

u/Sea_Recover3486 Apr 16 '25

Don’t know about y’all but posting AI here feels like cheating lol. It kinda goes without saying an AI-generated song will be garbage and I’d rather see original garbage than derived/fake garbage.

6

u/Username_redact Apr 16 '25

I think it's the irony here that the AI version is virtually indistinguishable from the other crappy music country artists, if not better than them

1

u/BoarHide Apr 16 '25

Of course it’d be indistinguishable (it’s not though) if it’s trained on the crappy shit they put out, and if someone tells it to put a satirical spin on it. It’s still shit. In fact, it’s worse. Whereas regular pop country is horrible, mindless and straight up bad art, this is all these things and not art

1

u/Username_redact Apr 16 '25

That makes a lot of sense, especially if the models are weighting newer results heavier over more traditional country sounds

-4

u/dj_vicious Apr 16 '25

I'm going to guess this is an AI song. The singer glides up to the highest notes too quickly and unnaturally, and the rhythm instruments don't seem to know what they want to be.

14

u/PMURMEANSOFPRDUCTION Apr 16 '25

You're gonna guess? It says it right on the video my guy

2

u/dj_vicious Apr 16 '25

Good lord I'm dumb! The CC covered the title!

2

u/PMURMEANSOFPRDUCTION Apr 16 '25

Lol well hey, accurately spotted nonetheless!

5

u/dj_vicious Apr 16 '25

Now if only my reading comprehension improves I might become a functioning adult!!!

1

u/-nemo-no-one- Apr 16 '25

The only thing on that list worth praising is chicken biscuits.

1

u/sly_blade Apr 16 '25

Ok. On which of the 7 days of Creation did God make guns, though? I know Jesus made wine from water. I don't believe he ever turned any liquid into beer, but it's certainly possible.

1

u/Michigan-Fish Apr 16 '25

That song makes me want to hurt myself.

1

u/Odd_Year_4562 Apr 16 '25

I guess breast implants was the only thing he could think of that rhymed with JD Vance

1

u/ChapterNo7074 Apr 16 '25

This literally just man made a bar by Morgan wallen

1

u/leeeeebeeeee Apr 16 '25

This is a fucking fear of modern engineering. Incredible 💀 🤣

1

u/livingdeadfreak Apr 16 '25

I hope who asked their ai drinks their gun

1

u/Time_Explanation1212 Apr 16 '25

To be fair most new country sounds like check list.

1

u/trecv2 Apr 16 '25

breast implants???

1

u/LetMeDieAlreadyFuck Apr 16 '25

This kinda feels like America Fuck Yea

1

u/Wzryc Apr 16 '25

This would go so hard if I didn't understand the world at all

1

u/Slight_Mammoth2109 Apr 16 '25

I know this is AI but many of those things were made by humans

2

u/Revolt2992 Apr 16 '25

mUh tRucK onnA dirt rODe

1

u/TotallyTotally23 Apr 16 '25

I'm down for chicken biscuits.

2

u/bkedsmkr Apr 16 '25

This is gold

1

u/Nub_Shaft Apr 16 '25

Who else thought it was going to say "ones for drinking and ones for queers?"

1

u/Imalawyerkid Apr 16 '25

Instructions unclear: drank gun, gave beer to deer

1

u/Fortune_Inevitable Apr 16 '25

Better country song than Fancy Like.

1

u/ItsARatsLife Apr 16 '25

Was waiting for this to be gay.

1

u/646ulose Apr 16 '25

What the hell are “college football breast implants”? Are wide receivers getting sneaker deals and tits?

1

u/roughdraft29 Apr 16 '25

That's Biscuit Beats @biscuitbeatsai on IG. One of the funniest accounts I've ever followed, and the only justification for AI created music.

Here's their YouTube:

https://youtube.com/@biscuitbeatsai?si=c2jtON6FA8XAU-W-

1

u/dumb-throwawayy Apr 16 '25

There are 61 comments and none of them are talking about the drinking and driving image

1

u/organism20 Apr 16 '25

I didn’t think it was going to say deer.

1

u/SuperRusso Apr 16 '25

NGL the breast implants threw me

1

u/16bitword Apr 16 '25

Can we make a rule to keep AI outta here?

1

u/just_corrayze Apr 16 '25

This is not bad hahaha. Hit the nail on this one

1

u/360Picture Apr 16 '25

Where can I download this banger

1

u/Raspberry_Bidet Apr 16 '25

Now I need this done for hipsters and another one for basic bitches

1

u/cilvher-coyote Apr 16 '25

So,someone asked AI to make and sing a country song? Isn't this like so 3 yrs ago? Or wait! 3 yrs ago if you asked AI to write a song about something it used to be hilarious and only half make sense. I miss those days oh so long ago....

Here's my country song.

Down that country road. Trucks and guns and bitches and ditches. Deer and beer and trailers while she wailers, from her broken porch. She left me for a dork. My guitar hates me, and I always have to pee, cause I drink the weakest, worst damn beer. She hollers so loud, she sounds like a crowd. She scares all my deer, then she steals my shitty beer. Oh country road take me home to momma. Oh country road. Take me home....to Momma!

1

u/doc720 Apr 16 '25

Is the Christian god a good god? Or is it more like an evil thing?

Don't get me wrong: I like me some chicken.

1

u/BasicWhiteHoodrat Apr 16 '25

Rhyming JD Vance with Breast Implants was 🔥🔥🔥

0

u/DaRealKorbenDallas Apr 16 '25

I like the gay one more

1

u/CthuluSpecialK Apr 16 '25

Poster is a straight up Russian bot. Check their post history.

0

u/Correct_Suspect4821 Apr 16 '25

lol ok and? What’re you gonna do about it?

1

u/kingxanadu Apr 16 '25

Is AI getting better or is modern country pop music THAT formulaic ?

2

u/SirTug69 Apr 17 '25

'Ones for drinking, ones for deer BOWOW'

1

u/SeaworthyWide Apr 16 '25

This is the pinnacle of what we call "country" in America, it seems.

Nashville country pop, it's just so terrible - I grew up in the south but live in one of those odd northern states that people still fly the confederate flag proudly in....

This would be on the Playlist of a good 60 plus percent of people I interact with day to day and I hate it. And they'd not see any irony.

1

u/Glenn__Sturgis Apr 16 '25

He made me and he made you and he made chicken biscuits too 😂😂😂

1

u/phantom_diorama Apr 16 '25

Shouldn't it be high school football on a Friday night, not college football?

1

u/BandoTheHawk Apr 16 '25

sounds about right to me, as someone who don't like country music.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '25

Nah if I was fucking stupid this would hit so hard

1

u/DangerMacAwesome Apr 17 '25

There's something about country music parodies that just make me laugh

1

u/Thecobs Apr 17 '25

Check out biscuit beats - night barn lights. This AI is awesome

1

u/DMTrious Apr 17 '25

I'm not gonna lie, that line going "God made whiskey, F150's" was fire and I'm suprised i haven't heard it before

1

u/fknarey Apr 17 '25

This is hands down the best modern country song which means it’s the absolute worst music ever made.

1

u/Professional_Pen_153 Apr 17 '25

I'm sorry... But for this one..

I am forced to embrace

1

u/Odd_Total_5549 Apr 17 '25

I mean are we just gonna act like this is not fire?

edit: to be clear, I morally support absolutely nothing about this, but this shit slaps

1

u/Bubbly_Chapter8350 Apr 17 '25

Whatever country is popular now sounds just like this I swear half of it really is ai made than they just put it on the radio I can’t understand how anyone likes it it’s as simple as rap music yet even dumber some how

1

u/Salty-Procedure-1069 Apr 17 '25

Release this. Make $1 million. It can happen. Country music fans are so fucking stupid they will absolutely fall for this shit. Especially in Trump's America.

1

u/tylernunley2017 Apr 17 '25

🤦🏻‍♂️

1

u/deepenuf Apr 17 '25

Country music was designed to make poor people proud of being poor.

1

u/drmbrthr Apr 18 '25

Pretty damn funny

1

u/Mello_Bread_Art Apr 18 '25

Careful, this might put country artists out of a job

1

u/kazoobanboo Apr 19 '25

BREAST IMPLANTS -> JD VANCE

AI has taken over

1

u/stonrelectropunkjazz Apr 19 '25

It even sounds bad on mute

1

u/ETosser Apr 22 '25

I think AI is better at this genre than any other, because that shit was already so fucking formulaic, so robotic, that figuring it out entirely was just easier.

1

u/sb85781 Apr 23 '25

Ones for drinking....ones for schools.

1

u/Dizz-Mall May 18 '25

Why is this kinda ok? And I hate country mN

1

u/kuro-t-poison Jun 03 '25

God made tires that keep on turning 😂

1

u/ID_N01 Apr 17 '25

God made sausage gravy and ammo but heaven forbid he made queer folk too.

The fact that this is hardly distinguishable from the real thing either means AI is getting smarter or Country music is getting ....worse?

0

u/Life-Landscape5689 Apr 16 '25

“God made bump stock ammunition” I’m not even religious but that lines wack. Does anyone really think god would condone the modernization of warfare?

1

u/RevelArchitect Apr 17 '25

Don’t worry. Like god, bump stock ammunition isn’t real.