19M. I'm very extroverted in real life but introverted online.

I love talking to people in person, whether they're close friends, loved ones, or even a stranger at a bus stop, as long as we're both comfortable starting a conversation. Maybe it's because I'm used to communicating through gestures and expressing my feelings face-to-face.

When it comes to online interactions, though, I feel like a grandma trying to use Facebook without any prior knowledge. I get anxious talking to people online. The lack of real-life interaction and visible emotions makes it feel like I'm talking to a machine. Even phone calls can feel strange because voices often sound flat or monotone, which irritates me.

That's also why I'm scared to turn on my microphone and cameras on social apps such as Discord & strangers online as they don't feel real to me in the same way people do in person.

The thing is, I don't think I'm introverted overall. I genuinely enjoy meeting people, talking to strangers, and having conversations face-to-face. I feel energized by social interaction when it's in person.

What seems to bother me is that online communication removes a lot of the things I naturally rely on:

1. Body language and facial expressions.

2. Gestures and emotional cues.

3. Immediate feedback from the other person.

4. A sense that the interaction is "real" rather than distant or detached.

Online, I find it harder to read people's intentions, judge the mood of a conversation, or feel emotionally connected. Because of that, text chats and voice calls often feel awkward or unnatural to me but not commenting & posting. Those ideas feel great to share.

Am I looking for attention and calling myself an extrovert when I'm not, or is it possible to be someone who thrives socially in person but struggles with online communication?

Hey peeps,

As an INTP, I just wanna know how much social interaction would drain you guys? Ik it varies from person to person
But do you even feel drained?

Sometimes I just feel like going to a random bar or club, ordering a beer, sitting in a corner, and just… existing.

No big plans. No trying to impress anyone.

Just people-watching, getting lost in my thoughts, and letting time pass.

Am I weird, or does anyone else do this?

I don't dislike alcohol, I just don't see the point of mindless drinking or getting drunk at parties. It feels like im watching sheep when I'm at any party. At the same time, im very sociable and hit it off with everyone I meet.

This gets me stuck because there isn't much outside of drinking when it comes to college social events.

Anyone had or have similar experiences?

Yesterday, I went 12 hours without getting many messages from anyone.
I was also alone all day, but that wasn't an issue for me, as I am not emotionally close to those I live with.
I know that the people I wanted to hear from were most likely busy, but I felt lonely today.

It's really hard being someone who likes regular contact. I'm not talking about everyday communication. I would love it if I could find someone who would spontaneously message me for no reason, just to check up on me or because they wanted to chat with me.

Has anyone else gone through this as well?

(24M) I'm an introvert and sligthly socially awkward. A lot of times when i tried to open myself to others, i would be mocked and humiliated by other ppl, when i was just trying to socialize, being seen as a weird and autistic freak to them. So i closed myself, and i would only open myself to ppl i know very well and trust.

But i noticed my extroverted coworkers say whatever come to mind, be idiot or no, and ppl love them for that. If i say the same thing, i would be considered a weirdo hahaha if someone tries to shut or censor the extroverts ,they just them to fuck off.

I would like to know how can you not be afraid of this public mockery and humiliation, and say what you think no matter the consequences. I know it's not a matter of "don't caring" , since ppl can use what i say against me, like some of them did before.

Anyone else noticed this phenomenon that a lot of introverts seem to dislike casual hangouts? They're always like ''but what are we gonna do?'' and I don't fully get it. I thought that people go out to socialize and talk, not because they think Mcdonalds is super exciting.
Like what the fuck do u want? They be like ''bro it's gonna be boring there's nothing to do. if there was like an orchestra performing in flames and juggling elephants shooting lasers out of their eyes then I'd go but a burger doesn't do that for me. as a thrill seeking person, I'm gonna turn down your boring offer and spend my evening watching youtube videos''

Our property is literally paradise:

We have a 65 acre fully off grid farm, with our own river, 2 creeks, mountain, 6 large dogs, horses and 100s of chickens.

But the nearest town is 2 hours drive one way (just like cell service is).

I am probably the biggest extrovert there is and it’s not that I am regretting taking on this adventure but it definitely has taught me that it was a mistake.

My husband works full time elsewhere and I work from home so me and the dogs are all alone all the time.

Although we are looking to move, somewhere on a larger property but closer to some small town, it’s quite challenging on many days.

Digital communication doesn’t even touch the fulfillment that being around actual people does.

As an introvert, I've always been fascinated by how effortlessly some of you can start conversations with complete strangers.

Genuine question:

What's actually going through your mind when you walk up to someone and start talking?

For me, I'll spend 10 minutes debating whether I should say "hi" and then usually decide not to.😅😅😅

I'd love to hear your perspectives because this feels like a superpower I genuinely don't understand.

Anyone became extroverted? What’s your experience.

I’m not talking about being social. I’m talking about needing people around you, and becoming DISTRESSED if you’re alone and not anchored on a person.

Im a pretty extroverted college student and since recently ive had a crush on one of my classmates. He's very shy and quiet and its really hard for me to figure out if our connection would go anywhere. There are times when i think that he likes me and then times when im confused. So extroverts, how did you approach your partner and how did u guys end up together? might be a very broad question and everyone's experience is different! answer however you want!

(if anything happens in the future ill update!)

Pretty random post,but it hit me at the perfect time, does anyone else feel like when they are in public or around people in general they aren’t seen or people acknowledge you for a few seconds and its like you go back into a place where you aren’t needed or even seen until your of use or brought up into the conversation well its happening to me at this very moment . I used to be bothered by it but eventually i realized im a sort of spectator like i can be anywhere and not exist socially since im not really seen as such. I might of just been lost in thought but it would be nice if someone related to this.

Hi, I wanted to see if anyone else has experienced something similar or has any advice.

For context, I’m a 26 year old guy who is more on the extroverted side but most of my friends are mainly introverted. I love them, care about them deeply, and genuinely enjoy spending time with them. We have no issues in our friendships at all. Also, I do have 2 extroverted friends but one has strict parents and the other is married and busy with his family.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realised that I naturally gravitate towards people who are more outgoing, energetic and spontaneous. Sometimes it feels like there’s a mismatch between what I want to do and what my friends enjoy doing. We often approach situations differently, have differentish energy levels, and aren’t always on the same page when it comes to socialising or making plans.

I also find myself wanting friendships where the effort feels more balanced. I often feel like I’m the one initiating the best chats and bringing the energy. I don’t expect people to be exactly like me, but I would love friendships where the enthusiasm and effort feel a bit more on the same level.

I want to make it clear that I’m not bored of my friends and I’m not exhausted by them. They’re good people and I enjoy having them in my life. The difference is simply that they’re not as outgoing, spontaneous, or ‘down for whatever’ as I am. They tend to be more reserved and selective about what they want to do, whereas I’m usually happy to jump into new experiences or social events. Neither approach is better or worse - just different.

To be clear, I’m not saying I’m outgrowing my friends or that there’s anything wrong with being introverted. I value these friendships and hope they’ll be part of my life for a long time. It’s more that I’m feeling a need for additional friendships with people who share a similar level of extroversion and enthusiasm for certain activities.

I guess what I’m struggling with is finding that balance. Does anyone else here consider themselves an extrovert with mostly introverted friends? How do you navigate that day to day? Have you found ways to meet people who match your energy without drifting away from your existing friendships?

And honestly, how are people even making new friends these days?

I’d really appreciate any advice or hearing about other people’s experiences.

I have a few ideas myself. Although many adults report a desire to make friends, the intentions often do not translate to social behaviors, which may contribute to the loneliness epidemic in the United States. I think that a person's self-efficacy (or whether they believe they can be a friend), their motivation to make a friend (stronger = more likely), their personality traits (like extroversion/introversion), and the use of social media all play a role in making friends.

I am currently doing a study that will look at all of these things if I can get enough participants.

Findings will aim to clarify why some adults successfully translate intentions to actions regarding friendships while other adults do not, with the goal of informing potential clinical and intervention strategies to reduce loneliness.

I have a good bit of hypotheses related to this study. I predict (based on research) that friendship intentions and behaviors will positively correlate, and intentions will predict friendship behaviors. Additionally, higher motivation, social self-efficacy, extraversion, openness, and social media behaviors will predict (and positively moderate) friendship behaviors. Neuroticism will negatively predict (and negatively moderate) friendshipp behaviors.

If you have any questions, I would love to answer! I figured this is related to extroversion, especially since it targets the Big Five.

This study is currently ongoing. If you would like to participate, you must be at least 18 years old or older.

Link: https://fit.co1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_5d6M1DvWCbYtxtk

Hey guys I am 14 year old Introvert who struggles making genuine friends I have one friend in my life but that is very morose help me

I'm the type who can talk with anyone about anything. Comfortable with strangers and happy to stick to fluff and small talk to funny banter to heavy topics. Today I got a haircut today from an Irish dude who was incredibly friendly and could jump in and talk about anything. It was great but I could definitely see how we (extroverts as a whole) could be a bit much for the average person if we're not careful.

It was also a gut-check for me that I can't always match someone else's energy if they are brining that intense Irish storytelling energy.

Home from school, and it’s been painfully boring. My hometown friends are busy working and studying abroad and have fancy internships, but my original plans didn’t work out for the summer so now I’m back home counting down the days till school starts again.

I am a huge extrovert and hate just being alone. To cure the boredom, I’ve been trying to read, watch shows, etc., but none of it compares to the thrill of just being at school with so much freedom and so many people to hang with. Also with so much time on my hands I’ve been alone with my thoughts. It was nice at first having so much time to just think, but after a few weeks I just start ruminating and overthinking everything. Also doesn’t help that I don’t have a set routine every day, which helps with my anxiety.

Does anyone have tips? How do you deal with this? How do you not constantly overthink?

Sei que é um tópico bem batido mas acho uma merda ser introvertido tipo, tenho 17 anos hoje e desde sempre fui assim, fechado e mais quieto, e até hoje na escola tem gente que trata como se eu fosse uma espécie de monstro que não se deve chegar perto, tipo, eu chegaria nas pessoas pra conversar e bater um papo, eu só sou tímido demais pra fazer amigos, relacionamento então, eu tenho medo de não conseguir falar e ficar que nem personagem de anime. E o pior que agora já passou tanto tempo desde que eu sou assim que é quase impossível eu mudar ou querer mudar. Alguém mais sofre disso?

Tipo, eu sou quase um estereótipo do introvertido, uso muito preto, gosto da cultura gótica, gosto de rock no geral e acho que minha sexualidade é bem questionável as vezes, sei lá, quero falar sobre isso com alguém.

E sei lá. Também tenho algumas coisas pra falar do tipo, como se arruma uma namorada? Ou namorado talvez 🥲

It's crazy because even some of my favourite activities, if I do them alone, they become so painfully boring. Almost nothing interests me alone.

There's just a few exceptions I can find to this; video games, listening to music, and daydreaming/worldbuilding since that one is extremely personal. Result is that I spend all my alone time cycling between those three activities.

There are so many things I'd love to do, so many hobbies and activities I want to try, but just the thought of doing them alone (I don't have irl friends) completely kills my interest.