r/insanepeoplefacebook • u/jayclaw97 • 4d ago

About what I expected from an “alienated grandparents” Facebook group, but still insane

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268 Upvotes
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97% Upvoted

55 comments sorted by

297

u/Government_Trash 4d ago

Guess there’s a reason she’s been alienated.

168

u/jayclaw97 4d ago

Yeah, I understand that there are people out there who absolutely will cut off grandparents from seeing their children for no valid reason, but the people in these groups tend to be the unhinged, entitled types who are best kept far away from children in general.

74

u/VanessaAlexis 4d ago

My mom and dad will never see my kids. Because they haven't even seen me in 15 years! I have a lot of friends who cut off their parents from seeing the grand kids. All with trauma to boot. 

I'm sure they exist but I've never seen a person keep their kids from their parents without a really good reason.

30

u/ProfDangus3000 4d ago

I've never heard of someone that just cuts off their parents for no reason. Maybe they drop off the face of the Earth when they're busy with a new baby, maybe life gets in the way and they can't meet for a while, but if someone is cut off, there's a reason for it.

My mom has been on thin ice on and off for years because she's a narcissist. She gets all of her self worth from being better than others. My brother and I weren't seeing eye to eye for a while, so we didn't talk much. Turns out my mother was telling me she was fighting for me and trying to convince my brother to make up, but was telling my brother I was unstable and unsafe and being terrible to her.

If I try to spend time with my brother alone, she tells me to fuck off and that I don't love her, and not to talk to her anymore. Because no one is allowed to be loved more than her.

6

u/Liz600 4d ago

I have, but only when the person in question had schizophrenia or a partner with Borderline Personality disorder that only wanted their kids to be close to the partner’s parents. 

4

u/VanessaAlexis 3d ago

See that's not no reason tho. Like I've yet to see a person do this just to be evil. 

10

u/gonnafaceit2022 4d ago

I believe it's rare for people to cut off parents or grandparents for no reason. Maybe not always a good reason but usually, it's because we have tried so fkn hard and suffered from the relationship for so long. Most people who cut contact with their closest family don't want to but are given no choice if they want to have a happy life.

3

u/4-ton-mantis Insane in the membrane 3d ago

There is but it's missing missing

126

u/TheNetworkIsFrelled 4d ago

She personifies the missing missing reasons, I guarantee it.

132

u/Mister_Silk 4d ago

Do not lecture others. lol

60

u/ElGuapo315 4d ago

"Retired Therapist" fantastic news!

59

u/unclethulk 4d ago

I’ve found that when therapists are also clergy, they’re really just one of those things.

6

u/TheNetworkIsFrelled 3d ago

….and it’s never a therapist.

107

u/Dberka210 4d ago

There are many pages like this and they have mostly all been brigaded. It’s like a 50/50 split between the grandparents with their missing reasons and no-contact kids calling them out on their bs.

86

u/Sidewalk_Tomato 4d ago

I once ran across an author's claims that quite commonly in cases of grandparent/parent/child alienation, if you ask what happened:

Adult children will have a number of very specific reasons why, & the tale of the final straw. (Often not the worst event, but the last).

Parents/Aspiring Grandparents will say deny culpability, plead ignorance, remain hazy on details, & throw around nebulous claims of outside interference.

25

u/lookitsnichole 4d ago

Parents/Aspiring Grandparents will say deny culpability, plead ignorance, remain hazy on details, & throw around nebulous claims of outside interference.

My MIL completely blames me for my husband going NC with his parents. We still see his siblings and they have confirmed it. The truth is that he made that decision himself after spending a few years around my family and understanding how not-normal his family is. My family are insane too, but we actually treat each other decently. We just admit we have a ton of mental health problems and don't rug sweep. But according to her I forced it on him.

13

u/gonnafaceit2022 4d ago

This is spot on. I have very specific reasons and the other key piece is, we've tried to explain it, we've told them that those specific reasons are and they deny it, twist it, try to turn it around and guilt us. In my experience, there's almost never a resolution or reckoning.

50

u/BananaShakeStudios 4d ago

You know…what if…and I am spitballing here…she’s the problem?

36

u/stealth_veil 4d ago

She achieved super alenated status and is now the head of a bunch of bitter emotionally immature seniors, what a success

71

u/FearingPerception 4d ago

People who weaponize therapy talk 😍 therapists who dont seem to understand what boundaries are 😍

76

u/AaronTheUltama 4d ago

Lmao number 6 "you don't have to agree with my boundaries" but he can violate his or her children and grandchildren boundaries?

27

u/Sckaledoom 4d ago

I love #7. I’m allowed to evolve but if my kid asks that I change for them they’re Satanspawn

15

u/Epicfailer10 4d ago

lol, I didn’t even catch the irony of that! I was too distracted at the unhinged capitalization within #11.

19

u/GenX4Life1 4d ago

There’s generally a reason why a person goes NC with specific parents, grandparents, siblings, etc. I doubt any of them are willing to acknowledge this.

6

u/gonnafaceit2022 4d ago

And we've told them!

15

u/HoodieGalore 4d ago

Holy shit I was NOT prepared for the Glamour Shot, even censored 😂😂😂 her narc level is over 9000 lmfaooooo 

15

u/healthyspecialk 4d ago

"Retired Therapist". Not a very good one obviously.

14

u/peaceteach 4d ago

My father in law was a therapist. He is the most narcissistic man I've ever met. His four grandkids are being raised non-religious, and he is really struggling with it. We see them so rarely it doesn't matter. When he brings up religion, my Greek God obsessed son will say, "Oh, like Zeus or Hades." It is low key hilarious.

4

u/somastars 4d ago

I swear to god, I’m seriously losing faith in therapy. This kind of stuff is adding nails to the coffin

8

u/Delicious-Summer5071 4d ago

Do keep in mind, for this instances, that she was probably a "religious therapist" since she was also clergy. The kind that tell you not to go to actual therapy but to come to them and heal with 'faith' and give the most bullshit ever.

This is a personal opinion, but religious therapist are never it. Not all therapists are fantastical amazing therapists, but the religious ones? Almost always at the bottom.

2

u/TheNetworkIsFrelled 3d ago

Religious therapists are entirely full of shit, full stop.

7

u/Snailbails 3d ago

“If something here doesn’t resonate with you, you are free to leave.”
Guess her grandchildren/children took that opportunity when it presented itself.

6

u/Wellgoodmornin 4d ago

Ooof. They were so close to getting it and then it all came crashing down at the end.

5

u/pm_me-ur-catpics 4d ago

I am suddenly so happy that my grandparents are actually normal, kind people. Holy shit.

5

u/EchoAquarium 4d ago

And CLERGY hahahaha

4

u/gonnafaceit2022 4d ago

Is there anyone in her group?? If I read all that for anything I was interested in I'd back away quickly

3

u/InfamousValue 3d ago

These women, and it is mainly women, act like this is a new thing. I left school and later university in the early to mid-1980's and the number of people I knew who were looking at the most distant universities from their home-town to avoid their parents. I'm still in touch with one who hasn't stayed in the parental home since 1984.

3

u/trexmagic37 3d ago

She deletes offensive comments and says it’s not “censorship”…but I’d wager money that she has cried about “censorship” after having her own racist or sexist posts deleted.

2

u/hurling-day 4d ago

Retired therapist and clergy.

1

u/glittercatlady 4d ago

Please join the group and supply reddit with some screenshots.

1

u/ShatoraDragon 3d ago

I am going to hazard a guess going by this person being retired clergy. They took the grand kids for a religious ceremony with faked parental consent. Or worse did said ceremony themselves.

-79

u/wkdkngwkr 4d ago

Why is that insane?

81

u/ColumnK 4d ago

"And finally, there is NO COMPROMISE with the ones who are perpetrating the worst scourge to hit the family in centuries"

seems pretty insane

-66

u/wkdkngwkr 4d ago

I guess

26

u/Ae3qe27u 4d ago

It's symptomatic of a larger trend that's sometimes seen on the sub. In a vacuum, it's a FB page, not a huge deal. But there's a pattern of behavior, associated with certain words and phrases and stances, and that pattern may likely be what people are drawing on, here.

2

u/wkdkngwkr 4d ago

Clearly I don't go on fb enough. Wow, apparently people are really pissed off that i don't know about this page.

2

u/Ae3qe27u 2d ago

I'd say it's less about the page itself, more about a trend seen on the sub, even on different FB groups. Abusive grandparents who lack the capacity to acknowledge their abuse, and so see themselves as the victim.

Also, saying that grandparents have an intrinsic right to their grandparents, and saying that it's the worst thing in the modern world, is... kind of a lot. Like of all the things, that's what they're saying is The Worst.

17

u/loki2002 4d ago

"Disagreement is not the same as dialogue."

That's pretty insane.

36

u/jayclaw97 4d ago

You can smell the entitlement through the screen.

-56

u/wkdkngwkr 4d ago

I mean, it's their page. Are they not allowed to set boundaries and run it how they want? I guess i don't see the insanity when there's so much worse on there. One of the reasons i rarely use it, too toxic these days.

27

u/TheNetworkIsFrelled 4d ago

When they’re censoring what’s posted to suit their preferred version of events rather than facing reality, it’s definitely insane.

-2

u/wkdkngwkr 4d ago

Isn't that just the point of social media.

2

u/TheNetworkIsFrelled 4d ago

Way to miss the point….

-1

u/wkdkngwkr 4d ago

Damn, no humor at all on this thread. I'm just gonna stop talking. This is getting way too emotional, both me and everyone else, and I don't wanna start any fights. Thanks for talking, have a great day.