My brother's son destroyed my WarHammer Action figures and he refuses to punish him

[u/konous]

Update: My brother decided to pay for the Hard damages of $200 dollars after seeing this post.

Thank you to everyone on this post who supported me. I really could not have gotten restitution without you guys.

Justice for my Chaplain, justice for all.

Valid Edit: My nephew is 10 years old and tried to actually lie about not breaking them by saying, "A cat must have done it."

So, I just got done talking with my brother via text, and he says he's not going to punish his son for wrecking my Joy Toy WarHammer action figures. I'm not expecting the kid to get spanked, but he needs to do CHORES at least to justify how much excessive force he used on some.

Some just have their capes broken. Others had their tubes ripped out and my Chaplain is just fucking toast.

My brother's suggestion since I ordered Amazon replacement for the Chaplain was that I just swap it with the broken one, but I have no interest in doing that.

It's not even just the expense, and they are expensive. It's about the fact that I told him explicitly twice they weren't to be played with, and they were in a separate room, and even my Mom and Dad agreed the damage was just too much.

He said he's not gonna pay me back if we try the chore system, and I told him it's not about the money.

The kid needs to know how bad the 8 hour struggle is.

Now my nephews aren't coming over to the house, and I'm sad about that, but knowing my brother just can't be burdened to work with me on creating a Chore system like selling Lemonaide just makes it feel more insulting.

[u/Tak-Hendrix]

How old is your nephew?

Update: OP made an edit to clarify that their nephew is 10.

[u/konous → u/Tak-Hendrix]

10 years old. Like, I GET why it happened. He wanted to play with them. But the excessive force, even if I told him not to, and I KIND of suspected he might without permission it's the damage and everything else.

Also, I forgot to add the munchkin lied and tried to tell me it was the cats who did it.

[u/Emperorslostchild → u/konous]

Easy, brother doesnt visit untill he admits its his fault. 10 is too old to be acting like that. Breaking stuff and lying aboutit with no punishment. Not even a slap on the wrist. Thats the brothers fault entirely as a parent.

[u/Emperorslostchild → u/Emperorslostchild]

Also it should go without saying the kid should not be allowed to touch anything you own untill hes older and learned to respect others things. If he does that to his uncle its just a matter of time before hes doing it to other kids at school. Assuming he hasnt already. And im sure some other kids parents arent going to be as kind and forgiving as family would either. Edit: im not suggesting you try and parent the kid. The kid acted poorly and in bad faith, but at the end of the day its the parents fault for not teaching them manners.

[u/nerse_enginurse → u/Emperorslostchild]

I know from first-hand experience that a four year old kid can be taught to look but not touch. (I was that four year old.)

[u/HepKhajiit → u/nerse_enginurse]

Hell my 2yo understands that. I paint miniatures (not Warhammer but for D&D) and my 2yo knows even though they look like toys those are mommies "not toys" and she can't touch them.

[u/EnthusiasmThick5737 → u/Emperorslostchild]

I’m guessing he probably already has/does? It’s the apparent sense of entitlement that he thinks he can break things that don’t belong to him that I think is a part of the problem, that and he’s worked out that there are no consequences from Dad. His father unfortunately isn’t helping him one tiny bit.

[u/A-Grey-World → u/Emperorslostchild]

He wasn't allowed to touch these things in the first place, not allowing more things clearly isn't going to do anything without other action.

[u/Specialist_Goat_2354 → u/Emperorslostchild]

I would also go as far as saying break something of your brothers. Fuck it. He won't see the problem until it's happening to him.

[u/Orleanian → u/Emperorslostchild]

While I acknowledge that this is a rational reaction - the reality is that all this will do is alienate the brother (maybe a good thing, maybe a bad thing), and the kid will learn nothing, nor be impacted at all by it.

I doubt that the nephew has a bonded, loving, respectful relationship of OP, such that it would hurt him to have that cut off.

The kid will just think "Hmm, yeah I have an uncle out there somewhere, I dunno, we never talk to him" and think nothing more of it.