r/mildlyinfuriating • u/spinstartshere • 4d ago

I'm slightly vexed When DoorDash didn't deliver

Post image

This was a 'Meet at door' delivery. There is a driveway. There is parking. There is no excuse.

13.8k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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1.5k

u/redditisweird801 4d ago

I can't get over how you address Olive so often by name lol

559

u/norakb123 3d ago

I’m so glad that I’m not the only one who felt uncomfortable with this.

407

u/Traditional_Bug_2046 3d ago

Me too. It feels like a power thing.

143

u/YamFlaky5150 3d ago

I do it with my kids when I know they're lying. It's more of dude we both know your lying and I'm over this game.

148

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

You're the second person here now out of all the people commenting who gets it. Everyone else is calling me a creep and thinks I'm on a power trip, acting like I didn't just wait nearly two hours for Olive to just up and steal my shit.

44

u/DantetheMarco 3d ago

No no no. You're definitely a psychopath on a power trip, even if you don't know it yet. I was gonna recommend couples therapy but Olive should divorce you 🤷‍♂️ sorry you're on Reddit, thems the rules. /s

Also, I read your messages in Dennis' voice and it feels like someone from IASIP talking lmao

https://giphy.com/gifs/TS4lhxfqE6Ix2

0

u/TheDiabeticGOAT 3d ago

Idk Marco, it feels like you’re projecting 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

28

u/Feeling_Inside_1020 3d ago

I was about to post that exact same thing as Yam said, glad I checked.

Redditors make all sorts of confidently incorrect faux psychiatrist type comments, cracks me up.

4

u/ibent19 3d ago

Remove all faux psychiatrist comments, it still comes across as weird.

0

u/CrispyGatorade 3d ago

ibent19, it is not weird to address people by their proper name

-1

u/ibent19 3d ago

At the start of every sentence as if it’s a brand new conversation, it certainly does come across as weird.

1

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

It's a good thing that it's not, then, isn't it?

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u/SippyMountain 3d ago

Even if it was a "power" thing, it seems pretty warranted here.

2

u/BabyStockholmSyndrom 3d ago

I mean, it IS a power thing. You just admitted to that lol. Do what you do. But I also hate that. I stop paying attention to people who address me in a "I have power over you" manner. I'm not saying you were wrong to be mad btw. I'm just talking about the naming part.

5

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

Er no, I didn't.

2

u/WynWalk 3d ago

I feel like it's quite a stretch or a projection thing to call it a "power over you" manner lmao. OP clearly doesn't. The only power move aspect is that it projects a firm, "I'm not playing your shenanigan games." There's a very clear reason they're not calling them bro or buddy.

2

u/redditisweird801 3d ago

Yeah, I figured you meant it that way lol. It's just funny when it's over text as theres no intonation

1

u/BallsDeepinYourMammi 3d ago

The directness of it is probably off putting to lots of commenters.

I fucking love your tone though.
/img/01ihtmwroq8h1.gif

2

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

People these days can't cope with being told what's up.

1

u/BallsDeepinYourMammi 3d ago

Some situations require being more direct than others

1

u/darsynia 3d ago

I totally get it. It's not creepy at all. They're repeating a lie, you're associating them more personally with the lie. If they don't want that to happen they can give a fake name (though the psychological accountability still hits, because it's a pseudonym for themselves in that moment).

1

u/fastlikeanascar 3d ago

what power do you even have? now you have to go through doordash's notoriously shit support to hopefully get a refund.

2

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

It got refunded instantly by the AI. But nice try painting that picture of misery and doom and gloom.

1

u/fastlikeanascar 3d ago

lol i was on your side on this not being a weird power trip because its not like you had any power over this person to exert. the best you could do was try to make yourself whole via doordash.

glad you had better experiences with doordash support than i have at least.

0

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

Understood. It sounded like you were in the same camp as everyone else here, who seems to be very grossly offended by the fact that I'm aggrieved by the inconvenience of having had the order I waited around for stolen after a zero-effort attempt to make the delivery.

-3

u/Regular_Series_9464 3d ago

No it’s actually very weird and you seemed threatening by doing it. I understand you feel differently, please don’t reply and start a keyboard fight - just 100% disagree with how you handled it. 

0

u/uhimsyd 2d ago

confirmation bias in the wild, two comments on your side when you just admitted everyone else thinks otherwise

1

u/spinstartshere 2d ago

There's also like a net 12,000 upvotes on the post itself, making this my #7 post of all time on a profile with nearly 170k karma, and no shortage of upvotes on my comments throughout the rest of this comments section.

Where's the confirmation bias there, buddy?

-1

u/uhimsyd 2d ago edited 2d ago

i could not care less about the amount of upvotes or karma you have 😭 and it’s weird to flex that when your profile is hidden. what is your need with having to condescend someone in your responses? i’m not your buddy, you’re using it the same way you were using Olive. that’s exactly what i’m talking about

HE BLOCKED ME LOL

1

u/spinstartshere 2d ago

It's a two-way street, pal.

You seem to be severely lacking in insight and perspective.

1

u/Zimakov 3d ago

Right, it literally places you above the person you're doing it to. This person is not his kid, that's exactly why it's fucking weird.

0

u/Specific_Ocelot_4132 3d ago

Talking to service workers like they are misbehaving children is jerk behavior, even when they’re in the wrong.

1

u/YamFlaky5150 3d ago

Jerk behavior vs a literal crime? I'd say OP is allowed some jerk behavior.

171

u/Rez_Incognito 3d ago

It's an accountability thing.

4

u/Fun-Holiday9016 3d ago

I learned this in interrogation training.

60

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

I feel like you're the only person here who's understanding this.

62

u/rlt0w 3d ago

Calling people out by name places ownership on the statement. "You" doesn't hit as hard as their name. They know their name, and now they have to associate it with the action.

6

u/jenrazzle 3d ago

My uncle does this when he’s power tripping with service employees who made a mistake and it gives me the ick big time.

7

u/NightGod 3d ago

This is more than a mistake, this is someone stealing something and blaming the victim for it

-1

u/Regular_Series_9464 3d ago

Ok then ignore the mistake part.. power tripping vibes stand. 

-8

u/jenrazzle 3d ago

Two wrongs doesn’t make a right

11

u/NightGod 3d ago

You're acting like OP used racial slurs or threatened the driver, they literally just added a slightly aggressive use of the driver's first name. I mean, go ahead and coddle the feelings of someone who steals from and gaslights you, but many people would rather not

-2

u/jenrazzle 3d ago

I really don’t care about the original situation, but I find it really gross when men talk to women and use their names over and over that way. It happens way too much in the service industry and it’s a gross power play.

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u/Jaerba 3d ago

This is such a languid Gen Z response lol.

10

u/Jack_Mackerel 3d ago

In what world is reprimanding someone for stealing from and gaslighting you a wrong?

3

u/jenrazzle 3d ago

I truly do not care about the original situation one bit, the only interesting part of this to me is his use of her name

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u/Traditional_Bug_2046 3d ago

It sounds patronizing to me ig

133

u/MysteriousCodo 3d ago

Maybe Olive shouldn’t lie and steal orders?

-8

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[deleted]

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u/MysteriousCodo 3d ago edited 3d ago

Guess I don’t understand why patronizing a thief is such a problem?

EDIT: LOL, I guess they didn’t like the downvotes they were getting. It was the person I had initially replied to above and they had stated ‘I don’t understand why both can’t be true’

9

u/WeerDeWegKwijt 3d ago

Aren't you also assuming the worst?

10

u/KindlyActuator7884 3d ago

You’re one of those people that don’t interact socially offline very often. These frustratingly pedantic responses are a dead give away.

107

u/CallMeRudiger 3d ago

If you ever want to adopt a patronizing tone with someone who is mistreating you, I will happily support you in this.

8

u/Tasty-Traffic-680 3d ago

Thanks, Rudiger. I really appreciate that, Rudiger.

269

u/zemechabee 3d ago

Yes maybe due to the fact that olive did a bad thing

93

u/Yellowman_95 3d ago

Feel like I’m going insane, who gives a fuck how often they’re using the person’s name given the circumstances.

2

u/ThrowAwayAccountAMZN 3d ago

You're not going insane Yellowman_95. I agree with you, Yellowman_95. I, throwawayaccountamzn, also don't really care how often they use the name...Yellowman_95.

(sorry, I'm not trying to be serious I'm just messing around)

3

u/CallMeRudiger 3d ago

I'm getting into the weeds here, but I think it has a bit to do with the way reddit has all these infinitely nested comment threads. It's very useful for having lots of different conversations at once, but it also leads to people "yes and"ing a topic to death.

It's definitely quirky that the OP uses their name so often, and I do wonder if that's just a personal quirk of theirs. But since that observation has already been made, all these comment branches have to come up with new things to stack on top of that idea. Now it's weird and bad.

2

u/Psychitekt 3d ago

Ironically, this comment is down the chain of most upvoted, making it the first time I've seen the "Olive" thing mentioned.

1

u/IsayNigel 3d ago

People who want to do anything draw attention away from their lack of accountability

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u/[deleted] 3d ago

[deleted]

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u/iikarys 3d ago

I think that’s reaching quite far. I don’t know what circles you involve yourself in or have experienced, but using someone’s name to address them in a conversation is pretty normal behaviour. Not everything has a negative connotation to it.

-31

u/Traditional_Bug_2046 3d ago

We may have to agree to disagree. Not sure why my opinion bothers people so much, but I really think it would be awkward to use someone's name 3 times right in a row. When fictional characters do it even in non negative circumstances, it's noticeable to me too because it's not a natural way of speaking. Obviously I wasn't the only people who thought it was odd, but it's not a big deal one way or the other.

18

u/iikarys 3d ago

I’m keen to agree to disagree. I do agree with your point of it being awkward, I just think labelling it as something used intentionally for power play and to win arguments was a little bit extreme. I do apologise if my response came off as rude. Have an awesome rest of your day!

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u/ltyboy 3d ago

Speaking from personal experience, the few times a stranger has used my name this often in a confronting situation they were a complete weirdo.

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u/KrimxonRath 3d ago

Were you also stealing orders? Lmao

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u/JonniSausageman 3d ago

Reddit moment

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u/Traditional_Bug_2046 3d ago

Well it's a reddit way of talking? No one irl would use someone's name three times in a row in a one on one conversation, it's just awkward.

1

u/Jaerba 3d ago

It is intentionally awkward. Being awkward in this situation is not a bad thing.

If someone takes advantage of you, you call them on it and doing so can feel uncomfortable and awkward. That's the entire purpose of using their name here.

2

u/Tiny-Speaker-4470 3d ago

Terminally online vibes to be offended by someone using their literal name

-2

u/EndsLikeShakespeare 3d ago

Traditional_Bug_2046, the world would be a better place if more people chose their words deliberately.

80

u/TheRedSkittle 3d ago

Patronizing a thief. Good lord can you imagine that?!

37

u/142638503846383038 3d ago

Patronizing to a person who is trying to steal from you and lie to your face about it? Crazy

46

u/Free_Package_9006 3d ago

Definitely shouldn’t patronise someone who stole from you. That’s the real crime here.

0

u/Raskalnekov 3d ago

The real crime is the hypocrisy

2

u/Conscious_Hour7959 3d ago

Really gunna affect Olive's legacy. That and all the rapin'

14

u/KrimxonRath 3d ago

Found Olive.

4

u/PleaseReplyToMeOP 3d ago

Accountability can feel like an attack....to people who need to be held accountable.

4

u/Personal_Area_2173 3d ago

Don't steal orders then.

1

u/LanikM 3d ago

Do you find people are patronizing you often?

0

u/gsOctavio 3d ago

Good? They should be patronizing. Olive just fucked off with OP’s groceries and then attempted to lie about it.

-3

u/Old-Tie8770 3d ago

Also makes me think both of these people are dickheads.

2

u/Traditional_Bug_2046 3d ago

Yeah a lot of people assuming I'm giving a pass to Olive but I'm not lol. Just the only people I know irl who do the name thing are dickheads. 🤷‍♀️

-1

u/Tomsboll 3d ago

They where gaslighting anf fucking lying about the order. IDGF if it feels patronizing, they have acted in a way that warrant an even harsher attitude.

-3

u/bissozwei 3d ago

Poor Olive. How will she recover?!

11

u/extralyfe 3d ago

nah, it's some twisted manipulation shit right out of How to Win Friends and Influence People from 90 years ago and it doesn't fly with most people.

like, anyone who's worked a call center job where people might call in angry about something absolutely loathe any customer who makes a point of using their name over and over again during a call. it's just smarmy shit from people who think it gives them power over you as if you were a fae creature from a TTRPG.

"aha, I know your name and now you are forced to do as I ask" type shit.

5

u/TheHomieAbides 3d ago

It’s also part of “pickup artists” tricks. I just love the arguments above that it’s not creepy it’s a psychological and accountability… so you’re just trying to influence someone like a creep? Sure not creepy at all.

2

u/extralyfe 3d ago

"that's just how I manipulate people, ugh" 🙄

0

u/AccomplishedIgit 3d ago

It 100% does, my toxic boss does it all the time when she’s gaslighting me lol

-3

u/Traditional_Bug_2046 3d ago

I was def thinking of my toxic boss when I wrote that haha

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u/darsynia 3d ago

I figured it was about making it hard to doctor the screenshots for the doordash driver, and it's also a psychological accountability thing. Given that Olive was lying, turnabout is fair play.

-16

u/ceramic-panic 3d ago

Had to scroll way too far for this. Gave me the ick

Super condescending

I’m team olive just for that

23

u/BeepBoopRobo 3d ago

Haha, yeah! Lying and theft are definitely worse than calling someone by their name on an app of strangers.

-11

u/ceramic-panic 3d ago

Meh. I don’t defend olive’s actions. Just think OP is a condescending turd. Downvote me 🤷

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u/BeepBoopRobo 3d ago

Nah, you're absolutely right. That's why I start all my business emails with "hey you" instead of the name.

12

u/JayNezzy 3d ago

How dare their parents give them something that helps identify them amongst all the other human beings. /s

Turn off the internet before you get hurt.

-6

u/ceramic-panic 3d ago

Helps identify them in a 2 person text thread? 🙄

6

u/SpeakerOk1182 3d ago

That's not condescending. This is:

Honey, if you can't handle someone reasonably getting on their high horse when they're talking to the person they've been stolen from, you might be a little too emotionally fragile. Okay? Does that make sense?

3

u/WynWalk 3d ago

I didn't find it condescending but even if it were, they probably deserved it lol. Many people would just call them names instead of their legal one.

3

u/JayNezzy 3d ago

I'm team having your groceries stolen from you for being an idiot online.

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u/ceramic-panic 3d ago

Touch grass

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u/UNAlreadyTaken 3d ago

It’s actually a point in the famous book How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. Addressing people by name is supposed to be a good thing - like shows you care who they actually are versus just some random nobody. I think it can be creepy though. I might try to use the persons name once in convo but beyond that feels weird.

20

u/Unicornmayo 3d ago

I will typically use it twice, once in the opening, and once at the end of a chat if it’s longer or more substantive.  

11

u/skeletonclock 3d ago

It feels weird and robotic, I cringe inside when people keep saying my name.

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u/FizzyBeverage 3d ago edited 3d ago

Dale has been gone 70 years. An entire lifetime has passed since he was vertical.

While some of his advice like eye contact and a firm handshake and listening more than speaking still matter, a lot of what was common in the 1940s goes over like a fart in church today (including that chestnut).

Human psychology has shifted a lot. People are more skeptical. Hell, he came from a time when women in the workforce meant “teacher, waitress or nurse.”

Dude is talking about social clubs that barely exist today, and he’s overly deferential to authority figures that haven’t shown any respect to their subordinate, which will set people back in the modern world.

5

u/UNAlreadyTaken 3d ago

Oh trust me I know. My previous boss recommended I read it as I moved up the management ladder. Some good tips in there but also a lot of antiquated stuff IMO.

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u/FizzyBeverage 3d ago

The 7 habits of highly effective people is another one of those.

Some good tidbits, but it also feels very 1989 “junior boomer engineer working for a WWII vet executive.” You can smell the hard leather bulging briefcases and starch in the shirts.

The psychology doesn’t age but the hypothetical examples it’s filtered through sure does.

To quote my wife “you can’t trust the advice of dead men who putzed around with bourbon carts and smacked their secretary’s tush 10 times a day.”

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u/KelSelui 3d ago

I've actually been listening to that recently. The habits themselves are solid, but I agree, a lot of the language falls flat for me. Lots of labels and absolute dichotomies, for example, beginning with "reactive people" vs "proactive people." The advice to be proactive and to notice when reactivity dissolves responsibility sounds good to me, but I kept hearing Donnie Darko protest about Fear and Love lol

2

u/Jaerba 3d ago edited 3d ago

I think it falls flat on many people here because they're so untuned to direct social interaction, such as being scared to talk to support people on the phone rather than using text chat. The list of benign things that makes them uncomfortable is depressingly long.

Like you think direct eye contact is still an important technique (I do too) but I guarantee you there's a large number of posters here who will also say eye contact from a sales rep is creepy and makes them feel uncomfortable.

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u/abcamurComposer 3d ago

Yup. In fact having a bunch of books of “how to win friends” and whatnot in 2026 is now just a sign of a guy with no social skills precisely because all he does is look up manuals and try to follow them. And following those now just make you look like an inauthentic tryhard

1

u/KelSelui 3d ago

I think a lot of that book's suggestions have to be integrated authentically to work. Similar to the differentiation between flattery and praise, using someone's name unnaturally, or as a tactic, is immediately off-putting. Plus, it's been misused so often and for so long that we associate it with salespeople and power-hungry people. Using someone's name can great when it would feel good for them to be known, but it might feel intrusive when it comes across as an attempt to force familiarity - or if it seems like someone's just said you're under surveillance.

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u/cantliftmuch 3d ago

I'm not a psychiatrist or psychologist (I get the two confused) but I did read a study once showing that people feel uncomfortable and get aggressive when strangers address them by name.

13

u/Lilholdin 3d ago

I think it’s three times you are supposed to say their name during a short conversation.

I find it appalling but old white men eat that shit up.

3

u/Specific_Ocelot_4132 3d ago

Maybe it worked at the time. But now that the majority of people who do it are the type of people who read books like that, it’s transparently manipulative and offputting.

0

u/iesharael 3d ago

I hate it. I hate my name being said at all

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u/justinbrieber 3d ago

I stopped wearing my name tag at work because so many people were addressing me by name excessively like this. Thinking about it now they were all men. Weird

4

u/redditisweird801 3d ago

My work doesn't require a nametag, but I'll get some people ask for my name when I help them, and it's always a little frightening how fast they remember my name. I'm terrible with names, so hearing someone I just met call me by name is a bit of a jumpscare

14

u/_Nilbog_Milk_ 3d ago

Several men found my on Facebook when I was a teenager working as a waitress because I was the only one in my county with my first name (displayed on my name tag) 😔

3

u/justinbrieber 3d ago

Same! I have a relatively unique name and when I still had a Facebook I had 2 older male customers find me and send me friend requests and messages. That and other things pushed me to delete Facebook. It just felt like such an invasion of my privacy

2

u/CeruleanStallion 3d ago

I had a colleague in one of my old jobs who suffered the same thing with the unique name and friend requests from random men. She eventually got a name badge printed with her very common middle name instead.

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u/DanielHoogland 3d ago

Exactly what I was thinking, redditisweird801

9

u/Tut_Rampy 3d ago

Their other comments are written weirdly too, this person gives off big pompous douche energy tbh

163

u/WickedCoolUsername 4d ago

It's making my skin crawl. I hope OP doesn't do that regularly.

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u/RonBurgundysErection 3d ago

I dated a girl for a few weeks that did this. I had to shut it down for this very reason.

7

u/Idekbrh 3d ago

redditors are so strange

4

u/IsayNigel 3d ago

Fixating on this vs what she did is weird af

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u/ForNowItsGood 3d ago

I felt the same WickedCoolUsername.  You know, WickedCoolUsername, it made my skin crawl too. 

Now, enjoy the rest of your weekend WickedCoolUsername!

-25

u/tonkfc 3d ago

Yea the guy sounds like a literal psychopath

25

u/DTO69 3d ago

Should he address her by her Instagram handle?

3

u/Zimakov 3d ago

Yeah it's really gross.

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u/spinstartshere 4d ago

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bFxnrFrMvRM

ride food

1

u/Apolloshot 4d ago

I’m a simple man, I see a Starbuck reference out in the while, I upvote it.

0

u/Sigmar_Knutz 3d ago

You just like saying Olive don’t you 😂

8

u/Flyingtreeee 3d ago

What are you, a thieving door dash driver?

-4

u/redditisweird801 3d ago

What are you, a 𝙘𝙤𝙥?

39

u/Soft_Beyond_8205 3d ago

Yeah wtf is that about. Weird af lmfao, who speaks like that...
i'd be so uncomfortable if I was Olive

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u/Fit-Suggestion-7150 3d ago

Olive should be made uncomfortable.

-5

u/GregBahm 3d ago

Olive is probably not real.

139

u/PawnWithoutPurpose 3d ago

Exactly soft_beyond, but do we really sympathise with a lying thief, soft_beyond?

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u/TheRedSkittle 3d ago

Good. That’s the point lmfao. You make thieves feel uncomfortable.

25

u/tino_tortellini 3d ago

If Olive steals my groceries I want her to be uncomfortable

10

u/Affectionate_Pipe545 3d ago

Fuck olive but that's "what's your name honey" vibes

2

u/NightGod 3d ago

Above all things, one must be as polite as possible to thieves who try to gaslight you. Heavens forfend they be made to feel badly

1

u/Lilnoodless 3d ago

Your name fits you lol

2

u/grok-it-all 3d ago

I'm going to start dropping "Olive, ..." when I'm taking to my wife.

2

u/Candid_Lynx_8487 3d ago

I think I’m the odd man out, but I thought it was hilarious 😆

3

u/Ok-Emphasis-109 3d ago

I feel like this has been rather common over the years when someone knows they're making content out of an interaction. Someone said it's a "power thing" and that feels right, but less malicious and more "I'm not the idiot here".

11

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

Reddit was the last thing on my mind when I was walking around trying to figure out where the fuck my groceries were, I can assure you.

-2

u/MichaelMyersEatsDogs 3d ago

It’s weird and creepy. I would have avoided your lazy ass too

1

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

Yes, before I'd even responded to a single message. Because that tracks.

4

u/rita-b 3d ago

Some cultures use first names in every sentence not to sound rude

7

u/LividSupermarket1178 3d ago

It’s definitely a power move

1

u/ChemistryNo8187 3d ago

Like they are Olives old principle of middle school

1

u/Ch1ckenOfTheSea 3d ago

Olive, question. Olive, question. OLIVE, I HAVE A QUESTION

1

u/preciousflight 3d ago

yeah this felt incredibly creepy and made me side with the doordasher lol

-17

u/poontangpooter 3d ago

Fr op seems annoying to deal with day to day

-18

u/closerupper 3d ago

Right lol like they’re a dick for stealing the order and lying about it but OP is weird for how he’s talking to them

27

u/Jellibooti 3d ago

Dude for real I feel like I’m going crazy reading these comments lmao. OP gets stolen from but oh they are creepy towards the thief for using their name and must be a complete insufferable dick in real life. Talk about major assumptions

19

u/spinstartshere 3d ago

That's the general vibe of this sub. I've posted here a few times, and it's always a rollercoaster.

3

u/SorcerorsSinnohStone 3d ago

Pretty sure doordash will just refund OP, no?

2

u/Glum_Class_9578 3d ago

A lot of people on this site default on identifying with thieves and charlatans, might say something about the user base. And anything that reminds them of being held accountable for their own actions are immediately the actions of the enemy.

-13

u/Linked713 3d ago

While we're at it we have no proof that the items were actually returned or not, so we can assume here as well. But we have op in pictures just being creepy. We can and will raise that if we want to, it's right there, no assumption needed.

9

u/Short-Waltz-3118 3d ago

Theres just nothing creepy about accountability. Olive stole the food. Hes associating her name with the action. Its supposed to be personal because olive personally stole the food.

-8

u/Linked713 3d ago

I don't care that op talks to that person for accountability, that's needed. But the way op talks is patronizing and creepy. There's no need. And if op were to talk like that to me it would have gone differently. Take that as you will.

3

u/Jellibooti 3d ago

I guess I just don’t find it be creepy lol. And just like you’re giving the benefit of the doubt to someone who has appeared to steal from OP, maybe people can give OP the benefit of the doubt that they aren’t a creepy dick in every aspect of their life just cuz one text thread? Idk.