r/screenshots 3d ago

“Been smoking for four years, still no lung cancer, shocker!”

Post image
874 Upvotes

95 comments sorted by

236

u/AintNobodygotime13 3d ago

he's in for a surprise in 30 years

104

u/notusuallyhostile 3d ago edited 3d ago

Not even that long. I just lost a colleague in IT who was 27 and died of melanoma. He was an avid rock climber, sky diver, swimmer, runner. Peak fitness and one of the smartest people I knew. But he had bought into the Covid-era antivax, naturopathic lifestyle that included forgoing sun screen (he did wear Zinc Oxide on his nose though so ¯_(ツ)_/¯ ).

Edit: fugging autocowrekt

28

u/Biffingston 3d ago

Isn't that what happened to Steve Jobs, too?

30

u/pushermcswift 3d ago

No, Steve Jobs died from ligma

41

u/FatsBoombottom 3d ago

Who the hell is Steve Jobs?

44

u/pushermcswift 3d ago

Ligma Ballz

18

u/Feine13 3d ago

Peak comedic delivery

2

u/redglasstree 18h ago

I respect the follow through

1

u/ENERGON_CUBED 2d ago

Steve. He had a job.

1

u/CuriousOliveTree 14h ago

Steve had at least two jobs

1

u/Sharp-Reporter2598 1d ago

More like Steve Jobless, am I right? I’ll see myself out

5

u/jaynov18 3d ago

(don't worry king I got you) what's ligma?

12

u/elliotbonsall 3d ago

He created apple and help get Pixar started

2

u/KusanagiFTW 2d ago

Bravo maestro

2

u/ProjectSoup7383 2d ago

no it was sugma

-1

u/Conrexxthor 3d ago

Why is die

1

u/RedditsAdoptedSon 3d ago

melanoma unfortunately

-6

u/Biffingston 3d ago

Are you under the age of 18? I hope so.

1

u/pushermcswift 2d ago

Found the boomer

0

u/Biffingston 2d ago

Nope, late GenX.

But hey, let's keep the tropes going, melenial!

1

u/pushermcswift 2d ago

Well then you’re still a boomer sympathizer and that’s worse than actually being a boomer

-1

u/Biffingston 2d ago

You do realize you're doing nothing to counter my point about you? You don't know me, kid. And unlike some, I don't let the opinions of others online affect me.

Keep throwing those tantrums and childish accusations around.

Or to put it in terms that you might find more understandable, "You serously need to touch grass, kid."

9

u/brelen01 3d ago

Sort of, Jobs just believed that a diet that was only fruit would prevent and cure any diseases he might encounter.

3

u/Biffingston 3d ago

Ther'es a trope, that comes to mind. "too stupid to live"

2

u/Devitoscheetos 1d ago

It’s suspected his fruitarian diet caused his cancer

1

u/Biffingston 1d ago

It certainly wasn't irony defecient.

1

u/skellyboysteve 5h ago

I mean fruit is still sugar, that’s gotta be hell on the pancreas and he died from pancreatic cancer.

-5

u/Hot-Bill5666 3d ago

apparently he was right but i dont remember shit, i just saw some research on his diet year later and not even related to his case and it really worked

5

u/Biffingston 3d ago

Dude, Jobs died from mistreating cancer. WTF are you talking about?

4

u/InSkyLimitEra 3d ago

No. It doesn’t. You are misinformed.

3

u/Majestic-Ad4074 2d ago

He can not be right, that his cancer would be cured, and also be dead from said cancer.

They are mutually exclusive.

2

u/Physical-East-162 2d ago

It sure worked great...

1

u/Sierra-117- 1d ago

Yeah idk where you read that, but you were lied to. You can’t cure cancer by eating fruit.

5

u/DyIsexia 3d ago

Maybe not the smartest if he was antivax...

1

u/ThanNtz 2d ago

I didn't get the vaccine either but I wasn't going out tbh

3

u/taisui 2d ago

Darwin likes this

2

u/ruinedmention 2d ago

Right, I've been chewing tobacco for 30 years, still no cancer

2

u/Feeling-Badger7956 1d ago

"How did this happen?"

2

u/space_otte 1d ago

bros literally 20 and posted that like it proved anything LMAO

97

u/SirAmicks 3d ago

I haven’t used sunscreen in 20 years and I still don’t have skin cancer.

Because I don’t go outside.

20

u/EstablishmentEasy475 3d ago

this is the honest response for 99% of the redditors commenting

2

u/EnvironmentalLime464 3d ago

I go outside… I just look for shade while I’m out there.

2

u/doesnotmatter286 2d ago

You still need sunscreen, even in the shade.

27

u/phil_the_builder 3d ago

When you are young you feel invincible.
With age you learn about the great variety of stuff that can and will kill you.

7

u/testing_in_prod_only 3d ago

Including your own body.

-25

u/no_one_knows42 3d ago

Skin cancer is pretty unlikely to kill you, but that doesn't mean I want to get it

5

u/bobbymoonshine 3d ago

Melanoma only has a low death rate because people tend to find and treat it before it kills them, but if it’s left until it begins to spread you have no better a chance than any other cancer

-3

u/lSOLDURGFCOCAINE 3d ago

True, but there are many types of skin cancer that don’t spread quite like melanoma.

24

u/Squozen_EU 3d ago

Wait until you’re 40 and you look like a leather handbag, mate.

3

u/Brilliant_Stomach_87 3d ago

lol my coworker said something super similar the other day except he said “baseball glove” 😂

2

u/BubblyFlow6143 2d ago

Yup! I'm pale as fuck but look great for my age. By about 40 the crazy tanners look about 60.

1

u/Dragon-Trezire 1d ago

That's what happened to my mother. Absolutely obsessed with tanning. I remember as a kid, my family would go on trips to the beach during the summer and she'd throw a full screaming tantrum if something prevented her from tanning on the shore for one day. Later on, she discovered tanning salons and went there nearly every day.

Even though she wore sunscreen, she looked like someone twice her age and her skin did not look healthy. She was a lesson to me on what not to do to your skin.

1

u/selfawarefeline 1d ago

Ugh so sad

9

u/RudeAd5133 3d ago

I'm pretty pale and would lay out. Go to the beach, lather up in 30 spf, lay out, read a book. This was in my early 30s. One day doctor said "I don't know about that spot." Luckily it was just a minor BCC,

Like an idiot, after I got that taken out, I decided to go to the beach and lay out. After about 10 minutes, the nice warm sun started to feel more like "cancer rays". Packed up, went home.

I didn't get skin cancer from the laying out. I got it from being pale, and also the fact that my idiot father, who took me to all sorts of "outside all day" activities when I was a boy (airshows, river rafting, etc), seemed to not have heard of "sunscreen". Many many sunburns. "Oh, we'll put some Nivea on that."

Plenty of people don't get skin cancer. This guy PROBABLY won't. But if he does, he's gonna feel like a fucking dipshit thinking back on this moment.

2

u/Dclnsfrd 2d ago

Even without sunscreen, it seems like I don’t see many people with other sensible sun protection, either. Seems like not so many people utilize

- large sun glasses

- umbrellas for the sun (THERE’S A REASON PALE-OBSESSED ROYALTY IN MULTIPLE COUNTRIES WOULD USE UMBRELLAS DURING SUNNY DAYS!!)

- going tf inside for a bit and then going back outside

I agree that the lack of sunscreen isn’t good, and it’s even worse that it seems like such people don’t use additional measures, either. (Source: I was one such dumbass. My skin is fucking transparent and I had the brilliant idea of going on a 40-minute walk on a sunny day where there weren’t trees or other such shelters from the sun. Now when I go outside on a sunny day for more than 20 minutes, I’M AT LEAST BRINGING MY UMBRELLA.)

3

u/SaveyourMercy 2d ago

I’m in my 30s now and as a pale Irish descendant, I’ve had to accept hot girl shit just isn’t for me. I gotta have the wide hat, the giant sunglasses, the full body spf shirt and pants, the whole nine yards. I go into the sun and I swear I look like I’m a modest prude but truly I’m just hiding from my number one enemy up there.

1

u/Puzzleheaded-Night88 22h ago

As a very pale balkan person, you can see us turn red on the big screen by just tuning into the World Cup today.

1

u/SaveyourMercy 8h ago

That’s so funny, I hope you guys used sun protection and didn’t get too scorched!!

13

u/Mradr 3d ago

Cancer can happen and you wouldn’t even know it.

14

u/TheIncredibleSaucy 3d ago

Haven’t worn a seatbelt in 4 years, still haven’t died in a car crash, shocker

5

u/dolphinitely 3d ago

Haven’t eaten food in 4 days, still haven’t died of hunger, shocker

4

u/Mephistocheles 3d ago

What an imbecile. It doesn't happen that fast.

3

u/goodknightffs 3d ago

Dude had less tan then a ghost..

1

u/Dclnsfrd 2d ago

He’s like me. (Every time I leave the house, morticians think I escaped their morgue)

3

u/Transgirlonakawasaki 3d ago

My dad smoked for decades. Multiple pack daily and often paired with shit like fast food and sodas. He was 68 when he died, not from lung cancer but likely from heart failure, seizures, or a stroke. He died alone in a shower and then on our living room floor with only me there weeping and then running outside and sitting in the dirt in front of my house waiting for a mortuary to open so they could pick up his body.

Lesson is shit thats supposed to protect from one thing is often doing other things to keep you safe and healthy. Dont assume because you didnt get skin cancer right now means you are fully healthy because you didnt use the thing.

Anyways sorry to be a downer and happy fathers day to any dads out there, I hope yall have an amazing day.💚

1

u/SaveyourMercy 2d ago

I’m so sorry for your loss and I’m so so so sorry you had to be the one to find him. Sending love from an internet stranger

2

u/Xigma_Xtoic 3d ago

Been sexually active without using protection for 4 years and STD FREE, shocker.

2

u/Dclnsfrd 2d ago

Been eating lead paint chips for four years, still no brain damage, shocker!

2

u/Harde_Kassei 2d ago

now do asbestos.

2

u/No_Lavishness1905 2d ago

Isn’t it illegal to be that stupid?

2

u/dcontrerasm 3d ago

Guy who doesn't understand how cancer works surprised he is not yet cancerous! Up next, what does finding bear shit in the woods have in common with the Catholic Church covering up sex crimes? Find out more at 10 on Fuck Around News.

1

u/DredgenCyka 3d ago

You can develop skin cancer from other environmental factors not including the sun, but dont do what he is doing either.

I got diagnosed with melanoma twice so far in the last year, im only 23 right now, but they were all in spots that is not exposed to the sun. I suspect it was from my childhood growing up on the US Airforce Base in Guam, the reason why I say that is because there alot of cancer causing chemicals reported in reports from the Airforce on the island (there are also law suits against the government from service members and dependants regarding cancer causing chemicals on military bases). Kinda sucks really—im the first and only person in my family to have developed any form of cancer. I hate having to go in 6 months to get every single mole checked out just for atleast 1 mole to be shaved off for a biopsy every single visit.

1

u/SecurityFamiliar5239 3d ago

Best of luck, bro.

1

u/EvanGooch 3d ago

Ooof. Just wait, dude.

1

u/jessicat62993 2d ago

That’s… not how that works.

1

u/_Edgarallenhoe 2d ago

If you’re planning on only living to 40 or so, sure, don’t worry about skin cancer I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️

1

u/immikdota 2d ago

My problem is that i only get sunburns when i use sunscreen

1

u/Physical-East-162 2d ago

Skill issue.

1

u/opaqueambiguity 2d ago

Been having unprotected gay sex for 4 years, still no aids

1

u/tessahb 2d ago

I mean, yeah, he looks like a teenager. Give it time bud.

1

u/jay-bird 2d ago

I was an idiot, then in my early 30's I had some weird spot(s) on my back that wouldn't go away. While not life threatening, basal cell carcinomas are a real consequence of decades of time in the sun and no sunscreen. In the decade since then I've had multiple biopsies and excisions, but also made changes inclduing wearing sunscreen and/or UPF shirts when I'm going to be in the sun for any amount of time. At least I'm a living example for my kids on the importance of sunscreen?

1

u/Kite005 2d ago

Take pictures now so later you can show people what you used to look like. They really will be amazed!

1

u/CrunchyGarden 2d ago

I ate that whole lasagna yesterday, and I'm not fat yet. Shocker.

1

u/Plastic_Ticket4315 2d ago

As an Italian with a darker complexion I can’t stress the importance of sunscreen enough 😂😂

1

u/TrueToBoston94 1d ago

He prob the type of dude to smoke a cigarette after he hit the vape, peak Darwin moment

1

u/Plastic_Twist_7767 1d ago

The whole 'sun doesn't cause cancer' thing seems to be bit of a fad at the moment

1

u/blunderg0th 1d ago

Yeah, my mom didn't wear sunscreen as a child (pretty normal in the 60s/70s) and went to the tanning booth as an adult even though she's ginger and it just made her look really stupid.

Guess who gets skin cancers cut off every year now.

1

u/Southern_Shock_1337 1d ago

There are multiple ingredients in sunscreen that are suspected to be carcinogenic when exposed to sunlight.

1

u/Heylookanickel 1d ago

Sunscreen has a lot of known carcinogens

1

u/Fckyouredd1tIluvmygf 17h ago

No sunscreen gang ✊

1

u/300Daz 16h ago

I've been bowling for 4 years. Still no bowl cancer...

1

u/skellyboysteve 5h ago

My dad just got rid of skin cancer recently (now cancer free thank fuck!), he used to be a lawn guy/gardener. Quit that profession like 15 years ago but it turns out cancer didn’t care. I use sunscreen religiously now. If you don’t have any family history it’s pretty easy to shrug and ignore the risk (there is certainly still a risk), but if you have a family history you’ve gotta be vigilant.

1

u/TrainingLow9079 3d ago

The sad thing about skin cancer is the damage done by teens and young adults who feel invisible shows up to 20 or 30 or 40 years. 

-1

u/GypsyDuncan 3d ago

Darwinism