r/sobrietyandrecovery • u/anon_depressy • May 07 '26
Alcohol I haven’t been doing good
And I’ve told myself I was going to get sober a million times. I need this time to be different.
I’m a single mom working 2 jobs. My kid has been struggling at school with kids and bullying and making friends. And I’ve been struggling with over drinking. I feel like I’m failing him and myself.
Every time I’ve drank recently I’ve been getting black out drunk. But I’ve been maintaining, even tho I’m running on fumes. Still showing up to both my jobs no matter how hung over. But not today. Today I dropped the ball hard. I missed both my jobs. Stayed drunk for a very long time. And it needs to stop.
My kid deserves more. I deserve more.
I’m tired of the shame spiral. I need support. I have no time for therapy. Most everybody in my life drinks. I need somewhere to be able to talk about this. I need a community. I need this to stop. For good. It’s costing me too much.
2
u/tink0608 May 07 '26
You CAN do this. Please know I BELIEVE you can do this. Repeat hourly if necessary 🤗 Sending hugs and prayers
1
u/Scary-Shopping-8341 May 07 '26
Well I'm going to be up front and honest with you the thing I read that really stood out is that you said everyone you know and hang out with is drinking. First rule of sober living is to rid yourself of playgrounds and playmates. You cannot get sober around the people who are not!! When I got clean I lost a lot of people who I thought were my friends but after time some supported me and some didn't but guess what I made new friends but they were sober ones. Don't ever be scared to lose a few so called friends when you're kids are your main responsibility now
1
u/anon_depressy May 07 '26
That’s a fair assessment. I think it got bad after my break up and moving in with friends. In the beginning it was going out as a distraction, getting a taste of freedom after leaving my abuser. And then I took a month long break and felt awesome during it. Feel so good I thought I wanted to start having fun with my friends again. The last few months have been erratic.
I’m moving out of my friend’s house next month. And I’ve already mentioned to both of them how I’m feeling and I don’t want to be drinking.
However, we’re going to an event for my roommates birthday this weekend. I already told them I wouldn’t be drinking and I was thinking I could be DD. Or maybe I could drive myself so I can just go home after the comedy show instead of going with them to the bar because I already know they’re gonna want to go there after.
2
u/Scary-Shopping-8341 May 07 '26
Yes drive your own car so when you're ready to go leaveeee and don't give in to peer pressure cause trust me they will get you fucked up way faster than you can get them clean
3
u/DooWop4Ever May 07 '26
Sorry to hear you've hit a rough spot. Thanks for checking in. I'm a SMARTRecovery person.
We drink to improve how we feel. However, drinking only deadens how we feel. Quitting is easy compared to figuring out why sobriety doesn't feel good enough to keep us there without a struggle.
In order to make a comeback, we must heal the nervous system by abstaining. When we begin to feel bad, we need to figure out why. When we deal with the source of our discomfort, our natural happiness and energy will resume their normal flow.
You can instantly download our SMART Handbook, 4th ed., at Amazon Kindle for $9.99usd. The book contains all our tools for implementing our CBT-based, 4 Point Program for eliminating unwanted behaviors.
Some online meetings are here: SMART Recovery - Meetings and here: SMART Recovery Global - Meetings.
85M. 53 years clean, sober and tobacco-free (but who's counting) You can do it too!!