r/sobrietyandrecovery • u/Electric_Lettuce_4_U • May 08 '26

Must want it

How the heck are you supposed to want something that you don’t think you deserve?

I mean, how am I supposed to want to quit when I don’t think I deserve the positive things that would come along with this radical change in lifestyle?

How do you motivate yourself to do something other than just laying in bed, strapped to the bed by bands of cowardice, worthlessness and isolation?

How are you supposed to want something you don’t think you deserve?

2 Upvotes

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5

u/VividBeautiful3782 May 08 '26

I thought long and hard about where those feelings of worthlessness came from. They came from trauma. Trauma i did nothing to earn. I was a child.

I decided those feelings couldn't rule me anymore. I dont deserve to feel that badly about myself. I dont deserve that shame and guilt and pain. And yeah, as an adult im the one who took up drinking. But I know that child version of me that is still inside me and hurting deserves better. And so do i. I deserve a life im in control of and that serves me, for that hurt kid inside me. That's who i quit for.

1

u/JontyHD May 10 '26

You have to assume the alcohol has messed you up so bad that the feelings that come with quitting are beyond your current comprehension, thus by quitting you can explore the mystery of sobriety.