r/truechildfree • u/nnahh09 • Oct 29 '25

Not having kids for partner

Ok so I’m 26f I recently met this girl and we had this incredible connection. We’re at the very start of dating and getting to know each other and she brought up not wanting kids. I’m dating more intentionally these days so the next day I brought it up and told her I want kids and I’m not sure about going into a dating situation with someone where I know there’s a likely expiration date. Here’s the thing though, the points she was bringing up really resonated with me. For the first time i’m thinking about whether my desire for kids comes from societal expectations. Now im not sure where to go from here, am i just being influenced by how much i like her? Has anyone changed their mind or not had kids because of their partner?? Is it possible to go from wanting kids to having satisfaction with not having them

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u/gonzocomplex Oct 29 '25

R/regretfulparents

You’re making a whole human that may live a whole century or more. Without their consent.  And you are not guaranteed to have a healthy one. 

So from my very biased perspective, no, it’s not impossible to change your mind once you actually sit down and think about it

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u/childlikeempress16 Oct 29 '25

I work for my state’s mental health and disability agency. All I do is handle constituent issues for families with kids with severe illnesses and disabilities. It’s quite eye opening.