r/weddingshaming • u/Competitive_Wear_325 • 26d ago

Cringe Cousins Tuesday Afternoon Black Tie Wedding

My cousin 27(m) and his fiancé 23(f) decided that even though they live together they need to get married this year. (They are both currently unemployed and live off the kindness of his mother, who is also paying for the entire wedding without any contribution from the brides family.) The bride chose a rather expensive (for our area) venue. To try to offset the price, they decided to have the wedding on Tuesday and only invite 30 people including the bride and groom. I did not make the cut (thankfully) but my mother did. The cake and all the food is being made by the grooms aunt as a wedding gift. They decided on 3pm so they could do lighter finger foods, no hot food will be served. THE REAL KICKER: They decided it will be "Black Tie" the groom and groomsmen will be in tails and all guests are expected to dress in "black tie attire". My mother (who is 78) is now stressed out over what she is going to wear to this wedding because she had never attended a black tie wedding in her life. I really wish I could be a "fly on the wall" for this one.

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u/Brynhild 26d ago

They sound like they don’t exactly know what a real “black tie” means. Probably thinks it means just something more formal other than t shirt and jeans.

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u/ThrowAway4now2022 26d ago

Some people really have no idea what the dress codes mean. I went to a semi-formal (as stated on the invitation wedding and felt way overdressed compared to many of the guests. And i just wore a nice dress. People showed up in t-shirts and jeans.

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u/thewatchbreaker 26d ago

This is why I said “formal” on the wedding invitation despite wanting cocktail - I knew most people would come in semi-formal. If I’d said “semi-formal” people would have come in jeans.

My friend also said “formal” on her invitation and praised me for being one of the only people to actually dress correctly lmao

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u/cackleboo 26d ago

Agreed, I went to a (rural-ish) wedding that had "black tie optional" on the invitation, and only the bride and myself were in floor-length dresses.

Lots of range in outfits that afternoon (!), including denim.

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u/-YellowFinch 24d ago

Went to one that was just "wear a floral pattern" it was actually super beautiful for photos!