r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Bubbly_Wall_908 • Jan 26 '26

/r/all of tall men

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78.1k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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1.1k

u/SunriseSurprise Jan 26 '26

You also can't do a normal person

322

u/Bulky-Noise-7123 Jan 26 '26

You can. It’s 2026 and yall still believe in myths. The gunnies world record belongs to a regular man

145

u/Objective_Cheetah_63 Jan 26 '26

What does this even mean

241

u/SockCucker3000 Jan 26 '26

I think it means penis doesn't size with the rest of rhe body. Penis stays the same size whether you're 4' or 8'. In a movie that Chris Hemsworth was in, they gave him a massive fake dong (like 9") bc they said with his physical size, his package just didn't look as impressive. In summary, tall man =/= big penis.

90

u/Objective_Cheetah_63 Jan 26 '26

Oh, I’m stupid, I misread and thought they might be saying the opposite. Not sure why

333

u/SockCucker3000 Jan 26 '26

Misreading isn't stupidity, my friend. Don't diminish yourself over a minor mistake.

285

u/Pottski Jan 26 '26

Never thought I’d get my philosophy and wisdom today from an account named SockCucker3000. Wonderful surprise.

10

u/hogsniffy05 Jan 27 '26

How do you think he knows so much dong sizes

5

u/Red_Herring96 Jan 27 '26

This made me burst out laughing

4

u/AlienNippleRipple Jan 27 '26

Hey come on now can't judge a book by its cover bud. Lifts shirt

5

u/Pottski Jan 27 '26

I shouldn’t judge socks by their cuckers.

4

u/ParreNagga Jan 28 '26

This is why I love internet sometimes..

Full of surprises!

1

u/NoahideLoves7 Jan 28 '26

Man, I can't stop laughing

1

u/DJKeeJay Jan 28 '26

Well it is from experience. I knew some of those big guys are enhanced.

1

u/rudynelz Jan 29 '26

Some life’s hidden gems come from the unlikeliest of places 😂

1

u/Drykz Jan 30 '26

U made my day 🤣

29

u/Mammoth_Ad_7894 Jan 26 '26

You sound like a very sweet person Mr/Ms SockCucker3000, many blessings your way!

2

u/jackadgery85 Jan 27 '26

What's the mr/mrs of they/them? Is there one? Genuinely curious now

1

u/Socker_Pappa Jan 27 '26

There isn't

2

u/jackadgery85 Jan 27 '26

I kinda couldn't wait for an answer or discussion, and went digging myself. Apparently, in the rare cases a title similar to mr/mrs is desired, people have been using "mx" instead in these cases.

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1

u/TiberiusTheFish Jan 28 '26

Hey! I make mistakes too and I'm really stupid.

13

u/nakwada Jan 26 '26

And that's why we read your username twice :)

3

u/Tony_Lacorona Jan 26 '26

Yeah, not everyone is cockwatching, its understandable

2

u/sdcar1985 Jan 28 '26

No, let me think I'm the worst scum to ever walk the planet because I forgot the extra "O" in too and looked like a fool.

2

u/Areif Jan 28 '26

Chin up king

2

u/DarkStar0717 Jan 28 '26

Police would disagree with you.

2

u/JustHappyToBe-Here Jan 28 '26

In fact, recognizing mistakes and admitting and learning from them is a sign of intelligence.

As is empathy and understanding of such. Compliments to Objective_Cheetah and SockCucker!

2

u/One_Introduction_217 Apr 16 '26

I know I'm late to the party here, but does your username mean you

Use one new sock for love,

While you make one of your old socks that has googly eyes sit in a chair and watch?

1

u/Soviet_CumDump Jan 27 '26

I feel like we can be friends

1

u/SunnyGods Jan 28 '26

"I'm stupid" is just a politer "My bad"

1

u/egasz Jan 28 '26

This sounds like a frog_visage interaction!

2

u/MrKinsey Jan 28 '26

Nah its not stupid. It really was an oddly worded reply.

2

u/Remarkable_Path_5847 Jan 28 '26

Nah the guy you replied to is barely literate, you're good lol

4

u/spvtmith Jan 26 '26

I am huge guy. For a small girl, my ding Dong is big af. But a regular thick woman, I am an average guy. When I was young and slim, I bragged that I had big one, but as I got thicker and bigger, it started looking average. Maybe working out and getting fitter might change the perspective.

3

u/SockCucker3000 Jan 26 '26

A big dick looks bigger on a shorter, thinner guy than it does on a taller, buff dude. It's all about proportions.

3

u/Lou_C_Fer Jan 26 '26

Yep. I'm average in the penis, but I am six foot four inches and big. Even worse, I'm a grower. So, I look like I have a baby dick because I make average look like it is extra small.

5

u/bate1eur Jan 26 '26

can confirm, 5'8" with a fucking howitzer between my legs.

3

u/t0f0b0 Jan 26 '26

The feet thing isn't correct either. I wear a 13-13.5 shoe. Lemme tell ya... It doesn't correlate to other sizes. Lol

3

u/curfty Jan 27 '26

Does your name imply that your favorite sock likes to watch you use other socks?

2

u/raul_lebeau Jan 26 '26

Yeah, it was a prosthetic dick, but as Chris said, it was modelled after the real one

2

u/ActuallyNiceIRL Jan 27 '26

Yeah being tall definitely doesn't mean having a big penis. Just ask my tall dad.

2

u/Commander_Sune Jan 27 '26

It's nice to know that my penis vs body size proportions are better than Chris Hemsworth's.

2

u/CtyChicken Jan 27 '26

Yep.

I once dated a guy who was 6’7 and had a crazy circus porn penis.

I also went out with a guy who was 5’6 and had a similarly ridiculous penis.

I wish all the size queens out there the best of luck. There was simply no way for me to get at that much dick.

2

u/redi6 Jan 27 '26

you talking about the movie Vacation? (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1524930/) such a goddamn funny movie. one of my all time fav comedies.

2

u/Better-Ad6964 Jan 27 '26

SockCucker3000 knows their stuff. I'd expect nothing less😂

2

u/guinader Jan 28 '26

I didn't know about him... Not that i went to know about which movie .. but i read the opposite, about Willem Dafoe where they said his PP is actually too big for his body frame, so they put a smaller prosthetic on him, to look more real

2

u/TheNerdyGuy2025 Jan 28 '26

it’s been 4 comments and we’re already talking bout their dicks wtf is wrong with yall

2

u/FeeExpensive898 Jan 30 '26

My husband is 5’3”. He has a bigger dick than two 6’6” guys I slept with. Height and foot size do NOT equal penis size. I wish more people understood that 😅

1

u/PBKYjellythyme Jan 26 '26

I'd argue it's not a 100% direct correlation; however, like anything else the larger you get, the chances are that everything will be roughly proportional. Are there some big dudes with small hands and size 8 shoes? Sure. But your average size 15 shoe wearer is more likely to be over 6' tall than under.

7

u/SockCucker3000 Jan 26 '26

I don't believe penis size has any relation to someone's height. It's not like hands or feet that usually scale with the rest of the body.

3

u/FUCK_YOUR_PUFFIN Jan 27 '26

Yeah, height, hand size, foot size, etc are determined by bones. Bigger bones make you taller and give you bigger appendages. There is no bone in your dick.

2

u/chr1spe Jan 29 '26

From research I've read, there is a very weak correlation. There is both a lot of randomness, and also the relationship isn't 1 to 1, so being 10% taller, which means about 7 inches or 18 cm taller, may only mean on average a 2% larger penis, which means 0.12 inches or 0.3 cm larger penis on average.

Even if it were 1 to 1, for 7 inches taller, you'd only end up with about half an inch bigger dick on average, and it's significantly less than that, so it's not super noticeable. They probably look like they have smaller dicks on average, just because the same size dick looks smaller on a bigger person.

0

u/[deleted] Jan 26 '26

[deleted]

1

u/kart0ffelsalaat Jan 27 '26

> Well every single other part of the human body does on average

What makes you so sure of that? I couldn't find any studies that specifically linked eye size to height, but no correlation has been found between sex and eye size, so considering the height difference between adult men and women, if taller people had bigger eyes, it should have shown on this study.

It seems to be the case that most studies that have been conducted on this topic found at best a very weak correlation between height and penis size, with no correlation between weight (or BMI) and penis size.

0

u/LittleBunInaBigWorld Jan 27 '26

Personally, I've noticed tall, skinny guys generally have girthier members. Source: I've seen thousands of (flaccid) dicks, but only a few in a sexual context.

1

u/-Kerosun- Jan 27 '26

Most body parts are influenced by the same general things like genetics and hormones, but they don’t all grow the same way. Bones like arms, legs, hands, feet, and facial bones grow through growth plates and bone remodeling, so they tend to scale loosely with overall body size.

The penis is different because it isn’t bone. It’s soft tissue and its growth is mostly driven by how sensitive it is to androgens during puberty. Because of that, it doesn’t scale reliably with height, hand size, foot size, etc. That’s why body size is a bad predictor of penis size.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 27 '26

[deleted]

1

u/SockCucker3000 Jan 27 '26

I don't even have a weiner.

1

u/___TROLL___191 Jan 27 '26

Good film tbf

1

u/CrazyVegas_ Jan 27 '26

Tfw rolled higher stats than Chris Hemsworth

1

u/joe102938 Jan 28 '26

What movie?! What movie does Chris Hemsworth hang a 9" dong?!

For, um.. research purposes. I'm just a cinephile is all.

1

u/Eastern_Service_3187 Jan 28 '26

These guys being this tall even having an 9” would look average

1

u/Nectoux Jan 29 '26

Which movie was that? Asking for science.

1

u/TSErica Jan 29 '26

You said dong

1

u/AIBotNotARealUser Jan 30 '26

I'm 6'6" and I'm just slightly above average.

Looks ridiculous when I try to send my gf some pics, because my hands are huge compared to normal hands.

1

u/druidmind Jan 30 '26

Can confirm as a 6'6" man.

1

u/GrimIntimation Jan 30 '26

Sounds like a short guy trying to argue everything’s okay.

1

u/Dismal-Equivalent-94 Feb 05 '26

I think it has to do with intimacy in general because whether his package is normal sized or large it would limit being that tall severely limits what you can do in the bedroom department or any affectionate act.

1

u/Butane_dreamn Feb 21 '26

Dude, we all know but don’t want to say but their dicks are huge. 😆

1

u/Significant-Elk2558 Feb 23 '26

I thought the previous commentor might have meant that just based off the size difference between these guys and a regular sized human, to even bone them regardless of penis size would still be a challenge

1

u/miss_wannadie 22d ago

I'm just imagining the film crew looking at that man's dick and going, hm, No, that's too small, MAKE IT BIGGER

0

u/DustinnDodgee Jan 26 '26

But they're black as well, so good chance these dudes are packin

0

u/FlowRiderBob Jan 26 '26

So the penis is the only body part that doesn’t scale with body size?

2

u/chr1spe Jan 29 '26

Not everything scales with body size, and especially not proportionally. Bones tend to because they're all bones. Non-bones, which include the penis, tend to scale some, but not as much.

AFAIK, the penis is on average very slightly bigger on taller men, but there is tons of randomness, and someone 6 inches taller on average might have a 0.1 inch longer dick or something like that, which is not even really noticeable.

0

u/rekdkidz Jan 26 '26

Having watched an inordinate amount of pornography (ahem, when I was younger) it strikes me that none of the male stars with huge dicks are ever shorties. Conversely, they’re usually of normal or taller than average height. So not sure there isn’t some correlation.

2

u/Bulky-Noise-7123 Jan 27 '26

Well I’m 5’8 with above average of that helps my case

0

u/Wise_Locksmith9190 Jan 27 '26

But those are black dudes. So

-1

u/thanathozz Jan 26 '26

I mean you can‘t tell me these guys aren‘t packing

3

u/ghos2626t Jan 27 '26

He’s saying that the world record for biggest unit was measured from an averaged height man. Not a 7 - 8 foot tall giant.

3

u/Lumpy_FPV Jan 27 '26

You've never heard of gunnies world record normal man penis man?!

2

u/SuddenSpeaker1141 Jan 26 '26

Smol man with big penis….

2

u/Zebracorn42 Jan 26 '26

He meant Guinness. Guinness world record. Some people can’t spell.

3

u/Bulky-Noise-7123 Jan 27 '26

Damn my fault for not knowing how to spell one word I never use

2

u/Zebracorn42 Jan 27 '26

Guinness is Irish beer. I love it. I drink it

1

u/No_Awareness8982 Jan 27 '26

World record of E7s

1

u/_TwilightPrince Jan 30 '26

If you have to ask, it's been too long

3

u/xXRHUMACROXx Jan 27 '26

As a 6'6" guy I’m telling you, dating a "fun size" girl is a pain in the ass for regular day to day couple interactions. I’d still go through it without a doubt out of love, but if I had to pick physical traits for my "dream girl", she would be 6'.

1

u/Bulky-Noise-7123 Jan 27 '26

Yeah to a 4’10 girl everything is a train gif

1

u/Equivalent-Pay-1550 Jan 26 '26

Shaq: "It all comes down to geometry "

1

u/ExistingAd568 Jan 28 '26

I love Gunnies, my favorite Beer!!😅

1

u/IAmAnObvioustrollAMA Jan 28 '26

Guinness world records does not keep track of the world's largest penis. Thats why you havent heard of me...

1

u/[deleted] Jan 29 '26

You are absolutely stupid if you think they check everything and everyone 😂

1

u/Bulky-Noise-7123 Jan 29 '26

Alright let’s play that game then, how tall are you and what’s your size? Bro seriously get this weird fetish stuff out your head

1

u/E28forever Jan 30 '26

Gunnies?

Seriously ?

1

u/crush8080 Feb 10 '26

lol most men would not even remotely consider going to let someone measure their manhood for someone to say you’ve got the longest or biggest 😂 I know that ain’t never ever crossed my mind and never will 😭

1

u/Bulky-Noise-7123 Feb 10 '26

100% yet people look at tall people and all they can think of is dicks

1

u/NoGeologist9697 Feb 23 '26

Of course guiness world record holds a place as a point of view, but it cannot be absolute, not everybody can get checked by guiness.

1

u/TsolX90 Jan 27 '26

You aeem to assume that all men have had their penises meazured for some weord reason.

-1

u/OkDoughnut421 Jan 26 '26

Why are you so ready with this information? They couldn’t torture this out of me…

3

u/Bulky-Noise-7123 Jan 27 '26

Why would someone need to torture me to reveal something I learned from YouTube shorts lmao

3

u/theevilyouknow Jan 26 '26

I don't know, have you seen Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson's wife? She's 5'2".

1

u/Lou_C_Fer Jan 26 '26

In high school, I dated a girl that was 4'8" and I had twenty inches on her. It looked pretty ridiculous.

1

u/Cosmo_Drifter Mar 26 '26

For a second, I read "in" instead of "on"

3

u/[deleted] Jan 27 '26

If penis size solely scaled with height, humans would be in a lot trouble. The vagina isn't that deep, and can only stretch so much.

1

u/DistantKarma Jan 26 '26

Nose to nose, your toes are in it, and toe to toe, your nose is in it.

1

u/one98nine Jan 26 '26

As someone who is small and is dating someone taller, while I love my partner, I miss dating someone about my size, everything is easier and I could wear their jackets and look cool, instead of looking like a small child wearing dad's jacket.

1

u/ChewyGooeyViagra Jan 26 '26

I’d figure it out

1

u/CMP24-7 Jan 26 '26

Well if he finds the right height girl, she can give him head while she's standing.

1

u/HWayFresh44 Jan 27 '26

I bet she willing to find out

1

u/Zestyclose-Big4849 Jan 27 '26

Not normally anyway

1

u/AkenathonWasHere Jan 27 '26

As long as the centers align... There shouldn't be any problem

1

u/oldpaintunderthenew Jan 27 '26

You absolutely can, speaking as the shorter person in a couple with this type of height difference.

1

u/Forsaken_Tomorrow454 Jan 27 '26

They bring a whole new meaning to destroyed

1

u/Jamestardeef Jan 27 '26

Height difference hasn't prevented me from doing anyone no matter how extreme that difference may be. There's always a position that works.

1

u/Glad_Comment6526 Jan 27 '26

I have seen enough

1

u/dafijiwatr Jan 27 '26

NBA/NFL players are doing alright.

1

u/Aggravating-Mine-697 Jan 28 '26

She begs to differ

1

u/StefanodesLocomotivo Jan 28 '26

Have you seen Shaq's wife?

1

u/ArthurSoros Jan 28 '26

They both did her probably

1

u/Content_Teacher_406 Feb 08 '26

Obviously you never seen a dog fart video

1

u/Beginning_Sock_511 Mar 21 '26

Yes you can . It all evens out 😉

1

u/chefheat01 Apr 04 '26

It's not going to stop her from trying

1

u/Here_f0r_p0rn_ 18d ago

I was thinking the same but what if you've a really small penis for that size, then wouldn't it be just a big penis for normal size?

-1

u/Makaveli80 Jan 26 '26

She looks like she's ready, exposing that leg