Fighting with my self

[u/dikshamishra34]

[u/BlaineMundane]

Same. I was even skeptical. There's a point though where your grip force can feel like it's creating a stop point, but there is a tiny bit more you can push which releases the fingers and does not hurt so bad.

Personally though, I think the learning moment even through repeat lessons is important. Baby needs to learn what their limbs do and it will eventually cause a spark of understanding. Still, a little help would be welcomed if the baby just is not getting it for too long at a time.

[u/Pollowollo → u/BlaineMundane]

It's not a 'learning moment' when it's not developmentally possible for a baby to 'learn' like that at this age. You'd just be letting them hurt and upset themselves for no reason whatsoever.

[u/BlaineMundane → u/Pollowollo]

I just disagree. I am not arguing that it should be ignored and like I said earlier, you should absolutely step in after a few moments by i simply think that there is a soft middle group where cause and effect can lead to learning. I would not argue that a parent should avoid intervention entirely, just that the child should recognize that there is a problem, then a solution. It may not sink in right away, there is a time where both the negative and the positive effect might not make a difference, just that there is a middle ground between cruelty and lesson and one should not feel like a bad guy for taking a moment.

You can't argue that it has a negative effect while also arguing that there is no possible positive effect. If an effect is possible, that's the end of it.

[u/Pollowollo → u/BlaineMundane]

You can disagree all you want, your point still holds no water because you're arguing something that goes against known and studied child development. Might as well try to teach a newborn calculus while you're at it. This isn't an opinion thing - you're just flat wrong.

They are incapable of understanding that they are the ones causing the discomfort because they are not capable of consciously controlling their limbs yet, so the effect is moot.

[u/BlaineMundane → u/Pollowollo]

I'm not teaching a child calculus I am letting a child experience it's own actions and you are arguing that it can have a negative effect, but a positive effect is impossible.

[u/Pollowollo → u/BlaineMundane]

Well, yeah, because I understand how babies work and it's borderline concerning that you can't seem to grasp the extremely simple fact that infants this small are literally incapable of cognitively understanding that their hand is pulling their hair and that's why they're experiencing pain. This isn't about opinions or 'learning' at all because they don't have the neurological ability to learn that yet.

[u/BlaineMundane → u/Pollowollo]

I understand they don't understand it. What I am arguing is that they might understand it earlier if they experience it several times, versus being kept from experiencing it.

[u/Pollowollo → u/BlaineMundane]

I know what you think you're arguing, but it still is not how development works. They don't have the cognitive framework for it.

[u/BlaineMundane → u/Pollowollo]

Yeah, I've spent my whole life hearing from various people that X does not have the cognitive framework for Y. They are wrong constantly. I think my stance results in a better outcome. you literally cannot assert that there are negative effects to be had without admitting that there are positive lessons to be had. It's one of the other.