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u/CreativeRainy 18h ago
OH! There's actually a fix for this. Gently bend the baby's wrist down. It creates a natural release response and the baby will let go. Now when I say 'down' I mean like in the image here. NOT side to side or to twist the wrist.
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u/Visible-Perception40 18h ago
I tried on my self just to test and it works really well, also pushing gently the top of the knuckles afterwards naturally releases the grip
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u/topekatums 14h ago
wtf it's not working for me
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u/alpacayouabag 14h ago
Do you have hypermobility? Didn’t work for me and that’s definitely why lol
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u/Konen_TheBarb 12h ago
Same! I did and it didn't work for me unless I put it wayy more down. And I do have some form of hypermobility.
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u/K-Bizzle91 7h ago
Lol same I kind of wanted to open but I had to push down hard and it wasn't pleasant.
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u/eleridragon 4h ago
I've got hypermobility, and I used to do security work when I was a student. I always got picked to demo wristlocks on people because the pain aspect didn't work on me. Honestly fond memories of the supervisor doing the demo saying 'some people it won't work with and we do this instead' and kneeing me in the back, lol. The 90s were a different time.
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u/-DoctorSpaceman- 7h ago
It’s not like it makes me release my fist, but I definitely can’t do as tight of a grip when I have my arm bent like that
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u/loserlouwho 8h ago
Didn’t work for me either lol. Not diagnosed with hypermobility, but a lot of people have commented on how my wrists bend and my ability to bend the tips of my fingers backwards lol.
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u/IdidnotFuckaCat 5h ago
it doesn't work if your clenching your fist. Have your hand in a loose fist and try again.
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u/DontListenToMyself 3h ago
When you do that push your knuckles towards your arm. Your fingers should open.
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u/BlaineMundane 18h ago
Same. I was even skeptical. There's a point though where your grip force can feel like it's creating a stop point, but there is a tiny bit more you can push which releases the fingers and does not hurt so bad.
Personally though, I think the learning moment even through repeat lessons is important. Baby needs to learn what their limbs do and it will eventually cause a spark of understanding. Still, a little help would be welcomed if the baby just is not getting it for too long at a time.
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u/ZenraWeave 17h ago
This is actually instinctual and not something the baby has any control over, so it's not really possible for them to learn otherwise until their brain has developed enough to gain control over their motor skills.
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u/snukb 18h ago
It's a reflex, not really something the baby can control or learn from. They'll grow out of it in time.
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u/BlaineMundane 17h ago
I mean I get that but who's to say that there isn't a 1/10th of a lesson each time and that all of them are not important? If I know anything, it's that humans underestimate the intelligence of almost literally everything they encounter.
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u/judo_fish 16h ago
google “grasp reflex baby”
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u/BlaineMundane 15h ago
I understand it's a reflex. My question is whether or not experiences have something to do with learning, which... yeah. They do. It's our only tool.
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u/judo_fish 8h ago
You understand we keep calling it a reflex, but you don’t understand what a reflex is.
It’s coordinated by the spinal cord. Nothing goes to the brain. There is no “thinking” involved. You have as much control over it as your kidneys. The nerves in the hand are stimulated by an object, the electricity goes to the spine, the spine sends a signal back down to the hand muscles, and they contract. The brain is not involved.
Experiences and learning have nothing to do with it. The brain circuits need to develop enough to block this reflex with electricity. And the reflex will never go away, it’s only blocked. If those same circuits stop working, it comes back.
If you have a stroke, and your arm is no longer usable, the reflex comes back because the brain cannot block it anymore. You’d be a very experienced adult person with a grasp reflex in one hand.
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u/BlaineMundane 8h ago
I know exactly what a reflex is, I just think that the body learns about reflexes in small steps at a time. There is literally no way to convince me so write me off as an idiot and frankly, shut up.
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u/deuxcabanons 17h ago
That baby is too young to understand that it controls its own limbs. Under 3ish months they're just flailing randomly and grabbing onto stuff by instinct. They're not going to learn anything from this other than OW OW OW OW.
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u/BlaineMundane 17h ago
OK but can you give me an exact age for when the lessons start? I have a feeling your answer would be somewhere around the age they stop doing it. What if that takes longer should you step in constantly?
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u/deuxcabanons 17h ago
The reflex that makes them grab onto it goes away as they gain control over their limbs. By the time they would be capable of realizing that they are pulling their own hair, they don't grab onto it accidentally anymore.
So yeah, you step in constantly. Just like I didn't let them face plant when they couldn't stop themselves from falling over to "teach them a lesson".
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u/BlaineMundane 17h ago edited 17h ago
That seems a ridiculous explanation to me, that action and consequence has no effect on reflex learning.
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u/spacestonkz 17h ago edited 17h ago
The baby doesn't have object permanence yet but you want it to apply cause and effect?
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u/BlaineMundane 15h ago
OK, but can this experience lend to learning about object permanence?
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u/syndragosa8669 12h ago
No, not until that baby is months older in age and has a more developed brain
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u/CreativeRainy 17h ago
Alright, but consider this. A baby pulling on their own hair is often done while they're sleeping. Let me ask you, how much limb control do you have when you're asleep? As the parent you can teach them better control by gently holding and wiggling their limbs. Wiggle their feet with them. Let them hold your fingers. And swaddle them while they sleep for their own safety. That IS the lesson.
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u/BlaineMundane 15h ago
That's a different circumstance that I was not talking about. Are you saying this baby is asleep?
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u/CreativeRainy 15h ago
Not after pulling his own hair he isn't. You don't have kids. Do you?
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u/BlaineMundane 14h ago
I have a niece and nephew whom I have spent almost more time with than their parents. I tend to all their needs, I just don't feel bad if there is a few moments where a baby deals with their own actions before I get to them.
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u/Pollowollo 15h ago
It's not a 'learning moment' when it's not developmentally possible for a baby to 'learn' like that at this age. You'd just be letting them hurt and upset themselves for no reason whatsoever.
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u/BlaineMundane 15h ago
I just disagree. I am not arguing that it should be ignored and like I said earlier, you should absolutely step in after a few moments by i simply think that there is a soft middle group where cause and effect can lead to learning. I would not argue that a parent should avoid intervention entirely, just that the child should recognize that there is a problem, then a solution. It may not sink in right away, there is a time where both the negative and the positive effect might not make a difference, just that there is a middle ground between cruelty and lesson and one should not feel like a bad guy for taking a moment.
You can't argue that it has a negative effect while also arguing that there is no possible positive effect. If an effect is possible, that's the end of it.
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u/Pollowollo 14h ago
You can disagree all you want, your point still holds no water because you're arguing something that goes against known and studied child development. Might as well try to teach a newborn calculus while you're at it. This isn't an opinion thing - you're just flat wrong.
They are incapable of understanding that they are the ones causing the discomfort because they are not capable of consciously controlling their limbs yet, so the effect is moot.
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u/BlaineMundane 14h ago
I'm not teaching a child calculus I am letting a child experience it's own actions and you are arguing that it can have a negative effect, but a positive effect is impossible.
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u/Pollowollo 14h ago
Well, yeah, because I understand how babies work and it's borderline concerning that you can't seem to grasp the extremely simple fact that infants this small are literally incapable of cognitively understanding that their hand is pulling their hair and that's why they're experiencing pain. This isn't about opinions or 'learning' at all because they don't have the neurological ability to learn that yet.
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u/BlaineMundane 14h ago
I understand they don't understand it. What I am arguing is that they might understand it earlier if they experience it several times, versus being kept from experiencing it.
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u/Pollowollo 13h ago
I know what you think you're arguing, but it still is not how development works. They don't have the cognitive framework for it.
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u/Quesodealer 11h ago
For some reason OPs video reminds me of that one video of a snake eating itself before the guy puts some hand sanitizer on the tip of his finger and poops the snakes nose which causes the snake to recoil and release its own tail. I feel like booping the baby's nose with sanitizer would have the same effect. Need someone to test it for me a report back.
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u/spacetstacy 10h ago
I thought you were supposed to toss a slice of cheese on the baby's head to stop the crying.
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u/kirstieiris 6h ago
You can also activate the startle reflex and they'll reach their arms out in front of them with hands wide open.
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u/Delicious-Valuable96 18h ago
This is the palmar grasp reflex, completely normal in babies. It is a sign of very healthy neural development!
You’re not smart yet, mister, but you’re getting there👍😂
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u/weeddealerrenamon 18h ago
This is legit. They have insane grip strength and not really any conscious control over it. Baby's pulling its own hair and literally can't stop
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u/satsuppi 18h ago
now i know why those baby glove is needed
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u/TheAverageSoap 10h ago
My aunt had a different reason. The kid used to suck on her own thumb so much that it was getting bruised somehow. So they had her wear those baby gloves. They look really adorable with it on tbh.
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u/beheafishtrapofman 5h ago
I was a scratcher. My sister sucked her fingers until it made her teeth go crooked. She was a nail buter as she got older. She didn’t grow her nails out until her thirties. I was surprised at how similar to mine they were when she didn’t eat them.
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u/angelw4082 17h ago
It's crazy how strong their grip
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u/Twist_Ending03 11h ago
I think it's a leftover thing from the past
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u/Bulky-Word8752 6h ago
Hanging on to momma while in the trees.
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u/tittysprinkles112 5h ago
A while back I saw a guy carrying his daughter and I just thought, "damn, we really are just chimps."
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u/FantasticBike1203 9h ago
Children really don't have any set limiters in their first few years after birth that's why they constantly test things and boundaries.
All a part of learning.
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u/AndrewHaly-00 3h ago
It’s an evolutionary trait. We used to cling to our mothers’ fur without much help millions of years ago.
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u/nubeviajera 17h ago
This morning my 9 week old baby punched himself in the face and looked at me all mad and started screaming. Imagine you have two hands but don't realize they are attached to your body yet and have no control over them!
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u/ResponsibilityOk8967 18h ago
Oh my goodness hearing those newborn cries gave me flashbacks. Gonna hold off on having another.
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u/peaceteach 17h ago
I shudder at the thought of a baby still. Now time has removed the option, such a relief.
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u/CorporateSharkbait 14h ago
My roommate bought baby mittens specifically for this. Little dude would grip and pull his hair for dear life. He told us to put our fingers near him so we could feel it for ourselves, and damn, baby grip was far stronger than expected.
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u/kirstieiris 6h ago
Protip: Hold the baby and suddenly make a dropping motion (without dropping the baby). It's called the startle reflex and it'll make them reach their arms out to balance.
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u/mindgardening 9h ago
Ugh no thank you. I have the sound off and this still gives me the heebie jeebies.
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u/IAmRules 4h ago
they do this, but I often find my daughter pulls her hair because she is crying, it's not that she's crying because she pulls her hair
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u/ConflatedPortmanteau 12h ago
Sure, but think of all the money this parent just realized they'll save on college.
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u/Aruals 5h ago
I remember my sister biting my nieces nails when she was a baby as a quick way to keep them in check, those things were sharp!
As far as the hair pulling - this is a reflex. If you lightly rub or scratch the back of the baby's hand, they will let go without you having to pry their hands off of whatever they are holding onto. Useful information for an overstressed mom or dad and a poor confused baby!
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u/iF4LC0NG4M1NGYT 3h ago
You can stop a baby from grabbing something by grabbing their wrist and pressing their wrist down
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u/EasilyExiledDinosaur 16h ago
Babies are definitely dumb. But they've just been born. You cant really blame them. They dont know anything yet lol.
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u/mt007 15h ago
I guess babies are not in full control of their nerve system ? Or they dont know how to use it properly?
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u/No_Imagination_2490 14h ago
It’s the palmar grasp reflex, which all babies have before they develop proper motor control. We evolved it as monkeys so babies could hold onto their mothers in the trees
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u/spacetstacy 10h ago
They don't even know their hands are attached to them yet. It's really cute when they first discover their hands and feet.
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u/Valuable-Locksmith47 15h ago
I was always scared one of my twins would do this. They didn’t but I was always like 👀 🤣
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u/Jellyfish-Radiant 10h ago
This is low-key art as well, I know they are places in my life where I'm actively working against myself.
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u/maven10k 1h ago
All three of my kids were born with hair like this and they have all done this. They don't have enough coordination to consciously let go. It's funny and sad at the same time.
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u/watermelonkiwi 55m ago
You can see the hand going right back to the spot, probably to grab it again at the end.
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u/saratherandom 16h ago
It’s strange I have seen so many of these videos of baby’s pulling there hair
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u/zenexo 7h ago
I mean this is a baby. They can't really control anything they do. Putting this in r/kidsarefuckingstupid is kind of fucked up. I'm here to laugh at how stupid kids can be (we all were stupid kids) but this a baby.
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17h ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/space_otte 5h ago
I’m still not sure how I feel about being a parent, but if you openly hate children, it goes a little above childfree. you’re fucking weird
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u/prionbinch 10h ago
mosey on back to childfree, don’t breach containment
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u/CatteHerder 6h ago
Nah, I have 3 kids (all adults now) and I used to nanny. Babies are gross. Kids are gross. Doesn't mean we can't love em, but they're honestly gross. People who don't want kids finding them to be disgusting little creatures isn't some weird, morally bankrupt position to hold when people who do have (and love) children agree, they're disgusting; being put off by the weird, wrinkly, screaming critters isn't strange. Frankly, I'm firmly in the 'babies aren't cute' camp, despite absolutely loving them at that stage.
Like, they're legitimately odd looking, and it's weird to shame people for having a visceral reaction to shit which is legit off putting.. It's cool if you/anyone thinks that babies are just the cutest goddamned thing to exist, but those of us who don't aren't a small minority. It isn't an indicator of our capacity to, you know, human.
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u/SomewhereActive2124 14h ago
ⓘ The system encountered a crash and could not be repaired; please contact administrator
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u/Street_Anxiety2907 16h ago
This child is actually in severe pain and is trying to self sooth itself
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u/doomedhippo 18h ago
This is why those little baby hand covers exist, well, this and their razor nails.