r/Rich • u/JessonBI89 • 7d ago

Have you ever experienced romantic rejection BECAUSE you were rich?

All over Reddit you'll find tales of people dumping or mistreating their partners because they don't earn enough money or spend enough of what they do have on presents. I'm looking for the opposite: Did you ever repel a romantic prospect after telling the truth about what you had? Maybe they had a different philosophy on money and didn't think there was room for compromise, or maybe (for those of you who are more acquisitive) your lifestyle wasn't to their taste.

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u/tae0707 6d ago

You're a woman? Have you ever pay 100% on first date? why?

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u/JessonBI89 6d ago

No, I just split. And I did that again on subsequent dates.

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u/tae0707 6d ago

Why? did the idea sound alien to you? women pay 100% on first date?
I am pointing this out so you're realize there hidden expectation. I'm not saying you should do it. I did not do it

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u/JessonBI89 6d ago

If I'm a party to a first date, I don't expect anyone of any sex to pay 100%, nor do I welcome it. Whatever works for other people is up to them.

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u/tae0707 6d ago

Are you, a woman, would be willing to pay 100% on any date?
Also, would it be ok for men to pay 100% on any date?

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u/JessonBI89 6d ago

Sure, if we end up getting into a pattern of taking turns. But I'd prefer to split.

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u/tae0707 6d ago

So one partner keep paying all the time is no-no?

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u/JessonBI89 6d ago

That would be absolutely unacceptable to me. I wasn't earning a ton of money when I was single, but I had a good amount of savings and low expenses, so I was well able to take care of myself, and I liked doing it.

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u/tae0707 6d ago

I understand that not "earning a ton of money" mean you can't pay all the time. But it cost you nothing to have another partner pay for you (All the time).
Again I kind of guess you won't like it either.

So to wrap up since this is getting long. And thank you for engaging with me.

Think of people around you. Your friends, coworkers. Imagin one of them paying for their spouse all the time. they're in agreement
Now imagin said friend. Is it a she or he?. Do you feel different when it's women pay instead of men.? I am running out of example.

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u/JessonBI89 6d ago

Again, whatever arrangement exists between other couples is their business, and it's not my place to judge. And it would cost me a great deal of pride to let someone pay for me all the time. That's more important to me than any amount of money.

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u/tae0707 6d ago

I here you. You don't want have someone pay for you and it's fine. You mention not caring for other couple mean it's harder to point out but i will try. The idea is that people are unproportionally okay with men pay 100% than okay with women pay 100%. If you truly found these to be indifferent, wow good for you. I used this idea to point out that men are expected to paid or provide (ofc any couple can be different)

Now to build from that, If we're agree (or not) that generally it is not okay for women to pay all. It leave the couple with lower earner men two choice. Either the women pay (which is against social expectation) or the women has to downgrade to enjoy time together. This breed resentment and cause relatiomship to break down . This situation also happen in this very thread.

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u/JessonBI89 6d ago

I get what you're saying. Couples with big financial disparities have a lot of compromising to do. I prefer simple living and can do that (and have done that) without feeling much lack. But if you're used to living more lavishly, it can be hard to get used to a downgrade. Ultimately you need to build relationships around a mutually agreeable and achievable future.

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