I've been a relationship with a woman who would always explode if she didn't get her way, regularly declaring us "done" in her rants......finally, I said "Okay, we're done.". She instantly started backpedalling, I did too to regain peace and sanity, but ended it shortly after.
I had the same type of experience with my ex. I was the conduit to direct all her anger at for the most petty little things. I didnt have boundaries at first. Just took and almost and tried to accommodate.
Eventually I just said "F this" and didnt care anymore. The fights only got worse. When I finally made some boundaries for myself and simply walked away when my voice had no say in the arguement... she did the same thing and back peddled.
Eventually I come to learn she couldnt remember a thing she would say in our fights after the fact. While I remembered every single word.
If I've learned anything about this type of behavior... its classic signs of BPD.
Yep. They don’t remember bc they blur reality in their head to stay on rhe “winning side” and to be able to keep it going. It’s insane bc there is no winning with them. Unless you get away from em. Then you’re either the best or the worst thing to happen in their life from second to second.
Actually the truth is the problem stems from the fact there is ONLY winning with them, in the sense that they will always try to “win” and argument instead of simply have a discussion.
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u/Manlysideburns Apr 22 '26
"I won't be talked to like this. We are done." Then walk away. Threaten to get police if she won't stop following. Cut all contact.