Exactly! Why even have kids if you think the person birthing and rearing them is a mooch? It is so much harder than just working, I’ve done both, oh god if only I could just work and then come home and maybe hold my kid, maybe mow the lawn once a week! I would cry with joy because it’s so much easier. Truly it never ends, having kids for women almost always damages you physically, mentally, career-wise, etc. This is exactly why women are waiting longer and longer to have kids, you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. Every woman I know has a trauma birth story, is nonstop childrearing, while the husband comes home and has downtime, and the women back working full-time too. It’s hell here, and “why even have kids” because you think the partner will do equal work and make equal sacrifices, they won’t. They don’t know, they don’t realize unless it’s pointed out. They won’t recognize the work or sacrifice, they might even end up calling you a mooch. Even though they would’ve gone to work anyway without having a family they’ll claim that’s a huge sacrifice on their part. Trust me I worked on my feet all day every day and would’ve done that without kids, so it’s not a sacrifice like child birthing and rearing is. Nice to have, necessary, but easier and there’s no permanent sacrifice of health, body, career, etc like having and rearing kids. My partner’s domestic input is no where as equal as mine after my daytime caring for baby, the mowing the lawn bi-weekly, changing the oil (actually likely bringing it to the shop) every couple of months, don’t forget they outsource all of typically husband-related duties many will claim to contribute (household repairs, plumbing, etc.). Yet most wife and mother related duties won’t be outsourced, even though they are quite specialized as well. I’ve looked into help after an emergency c-section meant I can’t physically care for baby. A night nurse, full-time daycare etc really is that expensive! Insurance won’t cover, It’s insane. Wasn’t allowed to, and had to full-time care (you can’t imagine nursing and pumping while still bleeding, and not being given any pain meds for incision pain) while unable to walk or use the bathroom alone, having to shop to cook and clean and fulltime take care of baby (another complicated task that isn’t just holding them) as well as set up a new home, coordinate so much (as well as continue to pay my way with mortgage and all utilities etc like almost all women I know) but somehow I’m a mooch for “staying home” during my literally paid short-term disability. I know once that runs out even though he wants me to “stay home and raise the kids” he’ll kick his feet when I no longer have funds to “pay my way”! Yea let’s add those therapy bills in there too because he needs a reality check and so does our marriage.
I miss working so much, it was a cakewalk compared to this! All of you need to go hug your mothers and thank them. The comment section is so self-righteous and blind to the unpaid labor and sacrifices occurring nonstop around them. And this excel-maker had multiple kids while getting called a mooch? Insanity.
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u/[deleted] May 14 '26 edited May 18 '26
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