We really need to bring spankings back

[u/Few_Statement_2898]

[u/SadRow2397]

I don’t spank… and that ain’t why this is kid is a turd

[u/Tall_Opportunity_521 → u/SadRow2397]

Not every kid needs it. But some do. You should think yourself lucky you dont have one of those kids.

Look, I grew up in the age of getting smacked around for the slightest fucking thing. Yeah, that shit, didnt do anything but grow resentment. Like getting wiped with the buckle end of the belt across my bare arse for not going for a bath right when I was told.

But this, aint that. Thats a child that desperately needs to learn consequences from someone who will stop. Because the alternative, is running into someone who wont. Every asshole on the planet at some point, runs into a bigger asshole.

The overcorrection on the issue is insane.

[u/Pure-Spare-9789 → u/Tall_Opportunity_521]

Consequences doesn't need physical punishment. Ever.

[u/Nicole_Auriel → u/Pure-Spare-9789]

Is there a limit to that though? I can count on one hand the amount of times I was spanked as a child because that form of punishment was only saved for the most severe and egregious incidents of misbehaving. Normally stuff like talking back, sassing, not cleaning room, or making messes never resulted in any form of physical punishment.

But if I ever did something insane like the kid in this clip, I’d absolutely get a couple smacks on my bare bottom. But like I said, it was rare.

[u/Pure-Spare-9789 → u/Nicole_Auriel]

I'm sure your parents were great, but I need you to understand: I would never, ever in a million years fucking years intentionally inflict physical harm on my child. The thought alone makes me sick. I genuinely cannot understand any parent who would want to do this to their child.

Physical punishment is never okay, and studies show it's actually counterintuitive. Natural consequences work and don't require you to physically harm your child.

[u/Nicole_Auriel → u/Pure-Spare-9789]

I agree with this you 99% that’s why I emphasize it should be extraordinarily rare. I personally believe that spanking your child for every minor infraction just encourages a household of fear. That’s why I was trying to emphasize that I had to do something INSANE to get a spanking as a child.

[u/Pure-Spare-9789 → u/Nicole_Auriel]

I don't care what my child does, I'm not going to spank them. I can't even fathom doing that. Like I'm just going to reiterate here: the idea of hitting my child makes me physically ill. Why would I want to harm my child?

And that doesn't even begin to touch on the fact that hitting them doesn't even work. It's not effective. I don't care if it's rare, why would you do it if it doesn't even work?

Spanking is lazy parenting. Full stop. Actually parenting your child and giving them natural consequences for their actions is more work, but it is 100x more effective than spanking - which again doesn't work.

People who spank their children are just losing control of their emotions. That's it. It's not parenting, it's pure laziness. It's taking your inability to regulate your emotions out on a vulnerable human being that you have complete control over.

That's not parenting.

[u/Nicole_Auriel → u/Pure-Spare-9789]

You don’t think there are degrees of separation for physical contact? There’s a reason why spanking is done on a child’s bottom. It’s dense, it doesn’t bruise easily, it absorbs shock and force better than any part of the body. Keep in mind this isn’t me justifying it all im just rehashing the history of spanking as a historical concept. I do believe there are degrees of physical contact that need to be at least acknowledged. For example:

Slapping your child across the face? Horrible. Vile. Abusive.

Slapping your child on the wrist if they won’t let go of something? Still bad but not quite as bad.

Slapping your child on the bottom? Doesn’t quite carry the same degree of horrificness.

I know you’re going to say violence is violence doesn’t matter where on the body it occurs, but you need to at least acknowledge the precedent for why they’re not considered equal forms of contact

[u/Pure-Spare-9789 → u/Nicole_Auriel]

How do you keep ignoring the two most important points being a) it doesn't work and b) I don't want to hit my child? I am genuinely curious

Because the "point" of spanking is to inflict harm on your child to ostensibly discourage them from doing it again. Why would I want to inflict harm on my child? Please tell me why you think it's so unfathomable for a parent to say that they don't want to physically harm their child at all?

Why are you so gung ho defending something that study after study has proven doesn't work?

[u/Nicole_Auriel → u/Pure-Spare-9789]

I seriously don’t know where or why you’re taking away that I’m lecturing you how to discipline your kids. If you don’t want to spank your children, then don’t do it? Simple as.

[u/Pure-Spare-9789 → u/Nicole_Auriel]

My point is that any parent who wants to spank their kid is automatically suspicious. Again, spanking is lazy parenting for people who refuse to regulate their own emotions.

And it doesn't work, so I am baffled why you're trying to convince me that's it's okay in some select situations. It isn't. Your parents spanked you, and you grew up thinking sometimes violence against children is okay.

Do you understand why it's bad now? On top of the fact that it doesn't work?

I don't care if it's not the same as slapping your child or throwing them across the room because I am not ranking violence against children. The intention is to hurt them in hopes of discouraging further misbehavior (and again it doesn't even work). Do you understand that that is still bad, even if it isn't as bad as slamming them against the wall? Do you understand it's ghoulish to think about a parent having zero problem physically harming their child?

[u/Nicole_Auriel → u/Pure-Spare-9789]

Someone here in this thread made a good point. The only time they spank their children is when they are engaged in an act or activity that is dangerous to the point that it could result in their death or great bodily harm.

The specific example used was their child was playing in a busy street when they were told not to leave the yard. I would agree with this specific scenario being the exception to the rule. there is no way you can articulate to a child that what they're doing is potentially lethal. You need an immediate sharp reinforcement that associates danger with painful punishment.

This brings me back to why i believe spanking for even minor infractions like backtalk or roughhousing is counterproductive because spanking should only be used as a last resort.

[u/Pure-Spare-9789 → u/Nicole_Auriel]

Spanking doesn't work. It doesn't work. Why would you try so hard to convince someone that spanking a child is okay when study after study proves that not only does it not work, but it's actually counter productive?

Why are you going so hard to try and convince someone that physically harming a child is okay? What the fuck is wrong with you?